A /BRIT/ CHRISTMAS TALE!
All the boys were headed to Lapland for the feast of our LORD's nativity. Wessex lay in the North sea and allowed the westerly winds push his huge mass gently o'er the flood. The Bum Bum King had captured some highly lubricated nigger body builders to drive his noble purple sleigh through the air. Auslad had made a raft out of used tinnies. Bins was flying his enchanted bin. Dorset had tunnelled his way from the West Country with nothing but his little Dorset teeth! All the lads were coming!
22st had never been so excited. He had seen bins flying over his house and had waved at him. His first /brit/ meet up was finally happening! He was in his big white truck and jollily did he scream "nigger!" at the passers by!
"bbrbrbbrbbbbb" said the engine. "What's the matter, dear engine, hast thou a cough?" asked 22st. Black smoke began to billow forth from the hood. "heh, just like Auschwitz" chuckled 22st. Then, with an almighty bang, the whole engine gave up the ghost and wouldn't talk to him anymore!
22st was panicking . . . how would he reach the /brit/ Christmas party?? He paced and he swore. Why did these things always happen to him? He had promised panzie they would choke out trannies together but now all his plans were ruined! He sat down and began to weep as ice and darkness surrounded him.
Suddenly, a bright yellow light shone in the distance. 22st was startled. "A shooting star??" quoth he. Yet it split in two . . . and it was coming straight for him! 22st began to run as fast as his body could carry him . . . it was a minivan! "Wait", 22st said to himself, "are those . . . yes! It's full of refugees!"
22st turned and with a great huff he charged the minivan toppling it to one side and killing three people instantly! "We regret our lives spent serving world Jewry!" they cried in unison as 22st filmed them to later upload to the myriad of gore websites bookmarked on his mozilla firefox homepage. Then, 22st walked over and collected the survivors. Afghans. Iraqis. Even some Nigerians. "I need your excess labour " he cried manically as he strapped them to his truck. "pull!" he cried, the confederate flag dull in the Norwegian moonlight.
Pull him they did. Over mountains and through forest. 22st collected many ethnic minorities on the way to replace the ones who were dying. The wheels of his truck smashed them into an orange and red mass of gore beneath him.
He arrived at the Christmas party. The lads were drinking tinnies around the camp fire and dancing to Gary Glitter. One austist wanted to put on vapourwave but he was thrown into the flames.
Suddenly, a familiar figure emerged from behind schizo, who was dressed in his tinfoil suit and wearing a tinfoil elf hat. It was FATHER CHRISTMAS! "You have served the white race well 22st", what is your Christmas wish?"
22st looked around him: "It's already come true!" he cried as he embraced all of his /brit/ friends!
Dorset sadly passed away that night for unrelated reasons.