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King of Shitposting

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WWE Comic Thred #3 Boliever 02/22/2018 (Thu) 10:38:55 Id: 8041bc No. 99160
New thread for a new nightmare. Old one takes too long to load now and why not have a clean BREAK. It's over here if you want to see (most of) The Shield arc and other nonsense >>58119 Issue #14, the start of the new arc where we get to see how Stephanie invented women's wrestling. Isn't that great news! I want to die. Better yet it looks like we're going to be concentrating on Booley for the time being and how much of a geek she is. On a side note, why the hell is tennis mentioned? It's been a big women's sport for decades.
Oh god, we're not ready for this.
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Fun fact, this thread took 9 fucking attempts to make because of how captcha works
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We've buried her on the main roster and dammit, we can retroactively bury her in NXT as well
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Not a single baby from Dusty, bullshit. Also sad John
Goddamn, I can hardly read it. I can get that they don't want to draw their women aesthetically, but if you aren't going to draw nice looking things, draw things with decent anatomy. The panels are filled with comic exaggeration proportions to try and make things attractive on the page, but it means nothing if the characters look like poorly shaded, uninspired men with "tits" (and I really stretch to use the term in some of the panels) and female hair.
>>99164 >Doing this to Dream's legacy Now I get the tumblrfags when they describe themselves as shaking with anger in their chair.
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>complaining about match length while pretending it's a shoot More Booley burial. Can't just say "we need talent in NXT to train the rookies", nooo, gotta make her a geek.
>>99167 >Scream loud enough and they will do anything So, when can we get pudding matches and lingerie models back?
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>>99165 It legit took me 30 minutes to read this first time through, it's just so dense with stupidity. It's one of the worst comics I've ever come across. Here's the backup, where the entire women's division is retarded and Asuka uses her ring gear as underwear. I admit the last part appeals to me.
>>99168 I damn near pissed myself laughing when I read that line. As we move to Roman's latest mega push.
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>>99163 >Heel Carmella >Ignoring that she was a babyface in NXT and was Booley's best friend Meh I just skimmed through the thing, like hell I'm actually going to read it. Sad Cena is the only good thing about this issue.
too much booley in this comic have some alexa
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>booley gets buried even in the comics
QUEEN ALICIA AT THE TOP WHERE SHE BELONGS
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>>99177 RUDE.
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>>99160 Is that supposed to be Alexa Bliss on the cover? It looks like Rene Young cosplaying as Alexa Bliss.
>>99185 It's natalya.
>>99185 It's someone better ya jew lover
>>99184 >says booleyfag that likes jewby riottttttttt
reading through while waiting for njpw and its basically Booley getting btfo all comic >>99185 this is the goddess and caramel being best bullies
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God, this feels like it was a lifetime ago. Issue #15 starring Geek of the Year Booley. And already >Most Improved trophies This fucking comic.
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Remember if you're not on the main roster no one knows who you are. Please ignore the massive pops Booley got at first.
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Wait! Izzy knows who she is so it's ok! Also her brother apparently works for Creative.
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Just think, if they had matches this good on the main roster people might actually care.
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Booley's greatest triumph, she's not a geek!
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And the weird Asuka backup continues. Booley's not even pinned on panel, just another loser selling. Well that was short lived.
>>103794 I try to read these thread. I think I got part of the way through the one where Rollins steals a motorcycle or something. I just can't finish. This shit, and it is a steaming pile of shit, makes my head hurt. Fucked anatomy, perspective, composition, palette, and that's not even getting into the wet fart of a story. I mean why does every internal monologe sound the exact fucking same. BOOley in the op and Asuka here are thinking the same way. Sure they are describing different things but it is the same voice describing them, the author's. This is not hyperbole when I say this: you have to be autistic to read this shit and think that these are characters. Somehow the author has managed to reduce characters played by real people down to shallow reflections of themself. They have take what already existed as a charicature to be easily consumed by braindead cattle, found writing even in that voice too difficult and, reducto ad absurdum, we have the author playing the part of every character as themselves. Slap a wig on boys we are done. Only an autist, or possibly some kind of TBI case, would be so insensitive to the subtext and subtly of language, the art and artiface of personality, that they could read this shit and think, >That's Asuka because it is the Asuka character speaking that is BOOley because the BOOley character is speaking. Even when I was reading WWFHoly shit I had to correct that to an F. They finally got me to unconsciously think of them as WWE comic back in the 80s I remember the characters having character. The Bushwackers would enter into a resturant and do Bushwacker things like bust the chops of the Nasty Boys when they interupted their steak tartar and caviar, but their voices and characterizations were different. This shit reads like the author grew up reading FanFiction.net and using TVTropes as a guide to prose composition. As long as it checks a list of things that need to happen in order to be cosidered a "good" story as decided by a bunch of literal autists and childmolesters than it is automatically a good story. Fuck I don't know. It's the middle of the night, I am drunk as fuck and I can't sleep because I watched a Great Muto no rope electrified explosive match and am all hyped right now. I'll go shitpost on /tv/ some more and stop shitting up your board.
>>103795 I agree they've done a great job making it product accurate.
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when i read these i look for meme panels
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I love these comics. They're so bad they're good.
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>>103821 Whoever draws these is fucked, holy shit. The first pic kind of looks like Booley, second doesn't and the 3rd and 4th look more like a young Steph. >>103822 3rd picture looks like a child. This is some deviantart tier shit. Funny to think these are official comics.
>>104424 She looks like that with her hair down.
>>104424 >>104426 This is it, this is what saves her career. If Vince sees her with her hair down she'll be champion forever.
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>>104426 >>104497 It is absurd how tall I had to make this image to fit both her forehead and chin. You people have objectively bad taste, but I guess someone has to fuck the ugly bitches.
>>104540 You missed the point pretty hard there. Remember why Michael Cole has a job?
>>104426 hair down heeley when?
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>>104426 She… actually looks great!
We interrupt our regularly scheduled geekathon for Wrestlemania. Another four story special but sadly no wrestler writing this time. We start with the Miz… why
WHY IS THE ART SO BAD
WHY WAS MONEY PAID FOR THIS
The sequel to the Macho Man story in the previous thread >>92719 Not quite as deranged but it's still a lot of fun
Why can't these comics be like this all the time?
More Macho Man, played completely straight this time.
>what if we repeat the Miz story, but actually do it well
You knew it was coming. WE'RE MAKING STEPH A STAR, DAMMIT!
I do love how she comes off as this sad, middle-aged crazy person. That's your fill of bullshit for this week.
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>>105540 goddamn i read these in machos voice YYYEAAAH I DIG IT
>>105539 Why can't they draw women well at all? It's almost insulting to the beauty of Sherri and Elizabeth. Also, why is Sherri white?
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>>105556 <dem missed quads Was just about to mention this, why the fuck did they draw her white lmao To be fair there are a few pics of Harlem Heat where the comparative blackness of Stevie/Booker makes her look almost confusingly Caucasian, but I hardly think they'd use a photo or two as reference points. Some frames she looks like Michael Jackson post-vitiligo doing a Cruella de Vil cosplay.
Max filesize is 16 MB. How big are PDFs of these issues? I'd prefer to download and read them if anyone can fileshare.
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THEY DIDN'T MAKE ROMAN LOOK STRONG ENOUGH!!!!!
>>106029 They're in CBR/CBZ files CDisplay and a few other readers are out there, which are really just renamed rar/zip files so you can take these pages and assemble them yourself. You can find them in halfchan /co/ archives easily enough too. Size can vary from 50Mb to over a hundred depending on who made the file originally. I usually have to reduce the quality slightly just so uploads don't take 20 minutes a post. Considering how shitty the art is you really can't tell. >>106030 That was surprising. Could of easily replaced the horrible Miz story with the first Roman/Brock match. More build for the current match. But it's WWE and they never do anything that makes sense. I mean sure no one actually buys these things sales are sub-5k but if you're doing it anyway.
>>106063 >sales are sub-5k my sides
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It's that horrible time again. Issue #16 and it's more geekdom with Booley. Hopeless being shit doesn't seem to understand Hunter's a babyface in NXT but I'm going to pretend it's because not even baby Uncle Haitch thinks well of her. Notice how the first 7 pages are done by a different artist this issue. The fuck is happening with this book.
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There are 10k words in this comic, her brain never shuts up. Personal blog note, I have a new internet connection and my upload speed is now 41x faster. This no longer takes over half an hour of my life.
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Time for fat
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What is happening with Booley's life in these
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What a fucking geek. And the backup with a lot more words than usual. Turns out Asuka's injury was only boredom. Following what the main roster did with her I guess she vastly overestimated herself.
>>112477 Oh fuck there are too much good frames to just pick one for a banner.
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>>112577 >7777 <Being Booley is confirmed suffering from god
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>>112844 > 112577 > 11(2+5)77 > 5 + 2-to-left (1+1=2) = 7 > 7777 Glorious autistacular digits!
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Issue #17 and it's all Booley all the time. Honestly surprised at this, thought it'd jump around to all the women like The Shield arc did. Oh well. We begin with Booley lamenting how easy failure comes to her.
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Reminder that Asuka learned everything she knows in NXT.
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You'll note the art's taken a drastic turn again, as once again the usual artist couldn't muster the will to draw this shit in its entirety.
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>Mick Foley This is a sitcom script.
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Then your dream died a death. And the pointless Asuka backup, which notably has Finn post-Jinder elbow.
>>116081 This whole series the author has taken a lot of liberties with the actual timeline, rewriting moments which happened at different times just to fit his story. Boy these sucked. >Next the kevin and sami show Won't expect anyhitng but at least should be better than this wymns revolushin shit
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>>116096 >Won't expect anyhitng but at least should be better than this wymns revolushin shit Spoiler, you were right. We're back in what feels like six months passing with issue #18. More historical revisionism! But rather less terrible than it has been. There is something rather hilarious about this comic. Once you notice it, it's impossible to ignore.
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>wearing the hat even to a wedding For fuck sake, Sami.
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>dammit! >you made my daughter look middle aged and crazy, never again! I laughed and laughed and laughed. The fucking ego of Vince.
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I keep expecting a bird to fly past to block Shane's face.
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HAPPY RUSEV DAY! Lets hope they haven't completely missed the boat on that like everything else. That's it, somewhat better than usual. This may be the least stupid issue of the comic written so far come to think of it. Which is a shame because that's the whole point of posting these. Thankfully the art saves the day.
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As the comic book industry continues its downward spiral into oblivion WWE comes to the rescue! Wait, no it doesn't, this is boring. So boring I kinda want to post the Ultimate Warrior's comics instead. But hey, it's issue #19 and we've come this far. In this issue, Sami looks feeble and Randy refuses to wash himself properly.
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Yeah fuck you Sami for stopping a middle aged man with a death wish from shattering your friend's rib cage.
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Bizarre art directives continue.
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Babyfaces are awful.
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Gosh that was exciting. Charlotte backup is kinda nice, I guess.
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Issue #20 anOH MY GOD IT'S SHANE'S FACE
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And it's gone again.
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Gosh this is exciting.
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Well that's another issue. We saw Shane's face. I'm this close to posting Warrior comics now..
>>125379 So Shane's face is visible on the cover and in one panel, but then goes back to the chin-only height. Seems logical.
Well this is interesting. It seems we have a new weekly WWE comic in NXT Takeover for the next month. This one is subtitled The Blueprint and it's about Dusty. And in a shocking turn of events it's actually good. It's still Hopeless so it's full of timeline mistakes but fuck it, I enjoyed this. Even the art's good for once.
Jobbing to an elderly Dream would be a step up for Jinder's career.
Making sense of vignettes.
This artist really likes cowlicks.
The fucking pancakes explained in a single page. No backup, which is for the best probably. Next week is Finn, at least if that article I read holds true.
>>126963 >And boy… she hates being called diva False, who wrote this shit? Not to mention she is on Total Divas and completely acts like one. >“As much as before I came here I was like ‘I wanna change that,’” She said, “When you think about a WWE Diva, you think of us girls in WWE, not like the girls that are in the indies, the girls in TNA or in other different companies. So yeah, the word Diva means a lot to me. Just redesign the Diva belt, because that butterfly sucks.” https://www.sescoops.com/add-paige-to-the-list-of-people-who-really-dont-like-the-divas-championship-belt/
>>126972 Dusty's a fucking time traveler in this and knows about the current brand split. Hopeless is hopeless.
This one is called Proving Ground and is about Joe, not Finn. I'd call the comic book press idiots but for once they didn't fuck up as you'll see. You'll see the art is back to the usual bland shit and the story itself isn't that interesting. But it's not actually bad. Be funnier if it was.
Would of loved that previous guy to have drawn The Demon.
As you can see in the little preview thing on the last page, they said this one was about Finn. They also said Triple H was in the first one and I don't think he was even mentioned. BOOM are liars basically.
NXT Takeover - Into The Fire. As you can see the art's improved again and the story itself is better than last week but that's not saying much.
99% of the time it's the main roster that fucks up talent. But for Ember it was NXT.
The fuck are these colours
I wonder where this is going.
Once again a comic book explains WWE booking better than WWE.
>>127904 I wanted to stop reading right after that first panel. Jeez.
>>127909 Someone got paid to draw this.
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>>127910 This too.
>>127915 >>127910 I can't shit on this art. Detail and anatomy take a backseat to style but it's dynamic and expressive not as much as the Dusty issue but I'll take it. Two things the usual art lacks. Hell, something the whole rotten industry lacks right now as they hire blue hairs off Tumblr.
NXT Takeover - Redemption, closing out a month of NXT comics. A decent issue staring Aleister Black. Slightly late because the comic industry has gotten so fucking awful even the pirates are losing interest. Imagine people too fucking stupid to even work for WWE Creative. They make up 95% of comic book writers now.
Full kayfabe on the entrance.
I wonder how much artists hate the modern trend of everything being covered in tattoos.
Regal is strangely adorable in this.
Sucks he got injured. Next month is AJ, so looked forward to fucked finishes.
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>>128242 >Those first two pages >Aleistar Black in this whole comic A bigger edgelord than actually portrayed in NXT.
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Next month turned out to be next week. WWE #21 and the comic became interesting again. This issue covers AJ's entire career leading up to WWE. Yes all of it. Minus a lot of details.
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Still weird even after all this time.
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I always drink and stare at my truck when I'm sad.
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NEVER SAY THE NAMES
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Wonder how pointing out how out of touch Vince is got past the WWE censors. The backup returns and while it started well… certainly captured Roman's promo skills.
>>128616 This was ruined by half-assed anachronisms. >>128617 >Modern Toyota hybrid bubble taxi in what's supposed to be 2001, when they'd either have Crown Vics or Caprices >Old Nitro logo, even though WCW changed its appearance 2 years prior >>128618 >Going through all the trouble drawing a period-correct ABA/Big Evil Taker >Only to draw current year Kane and Big Show in their modern attire >Cena cutout, months before Cena had even been called up to the main roster let alone developed his Thuganomics gimmick Plus it was Jakked or Metal or whatever that he appeared on, not Raw. Though I guess that was changed for storytelling purposes.
>>128620 Who the fuck wants to read this? Styles is one of the best WWE have now but who the fuck wants to read a comic about him whining like this? My family, my loneliness. It's not even a cool story line it's just a dude whining. If I was in WWE I'd want to be left out of the comic. All it's doing is destroying story lines.
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>>128620 >The weak should fear the strong
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Issue #22 and oh my god that cover. Maybe this book has finally BROKEN me but I liked this issue. A drastic improvement from the previous issue at any rate.
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If this series just turned into The Club's antics on the road it'd be the best wrestling comic ever made.
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Not pictured, the Good Brothers doing Stone Cold impressions for 8 hours straight while AJ goes insane.
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I'm pretty sure those coats are wrong.
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What a nice ending. Now what the fuck is going on with this backup?
>>130643 Pretty decent issue for once. That Cesaro short there looked wack, I have way too much to say but I simply can't.
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Issue #23, not as good as the previous issue but still fairly inoffensive.
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Surprised WWE let them remind us of Jinder.
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>cares more about hunting and fishing than wrestling Well he captured Brock's personality.
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AJ's dad is secretly Shane.
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Oh AJ. Backup is decent too. Next week, terrible branding and ball shots!
>>131994 Or next month I suppose.
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>>131994 >Soyboy hipsters were the NXT fans that hated Almas kek
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#24 with more of AJ's title reign, now with 1000% more ball shots. Another perfectly decent comic from this arc.
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So many ball shots
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The cheeky shit went into business for himself. Backup is boring but hey you can't have everything.
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>>133017 lmao wtf kind of ending is that, kek
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>>133021 >that image.
>>133283 Looks like Pillman.
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>>133496 Looks like Omega
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Another special, this time it's WWE Forever. The first few stories feel like a series of oversized backups but it gets better later. We start with some very questionable art.
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So the story is Jimmy Hart is clairvoyant.
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This looks like some kind of occult story from the style.
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Now it starts getting fun with 90s Clark Kent.
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Another good one with The Brain this time.
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Poor Weasel.
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That's it, a strong finish. Next week is AJ vs Joe because what the hell else are you going to write about.
>>134561 Jimmy conveniently left out all the bad stuff that would fall upon the Harts
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Issue #25 and it's the last one of both the arc and this series.In this issue Joe is creepy. Creepier than he looks on the cover even.
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So AJ married a McMahon.
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AJ should have just stayed in the hold until he was crippled.
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Next time Joe will bring his van full of toys.
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TWIST! He actually married Nakamura. That's it, no backup this time. God only knows what comes next, I'm not in the comic loop enough anymore to know. Might see more specials, might see another series starting at #1 for the sales bump. But god damn what a way to end it.
>>134772 >AJ's rivalries are all set up under some weird pretense of putting up good shows A little too self aware here
>>134773 I'm more horrified everyone AJ is close to manipulate him "for his own good".


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