I AM NOT GONNA MAKE IT! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

>>3408 Did the old one already reach its bump limit? Damn. We really feel a lot. Today I lost ten Euros, but my friend took over the pay for the food. What a nice guy. A shame that he's very blue pilled.

Wait, it's seven months into the year? I could swear just the other week I was telling myself how 2021 would be the year I started art. I want to get into a groove but can't bring myself to lay off the vidya.

>>3418 This year has gone by uncharacteristically fast, much like the previous year felt as if it were just crawling along at a snail's pace. Stop playing vidya friend, games went from being art and entertainment to being designed from the ground up to be cheaply produced mental prisons. At least stick to single player games with comfy art and stories.

>>3419 > Stop playing vidya friend, games went from being art and entertainment to being designed from the ground up to be cheaply produced mental prisons. At least stick to single player games with comfy art and stories. This nigger smart.

>my interest payment has gone up $20 a month on average since taking out the loan in March Am I missing something here or what have I gotten myself into? At this rate I'll be paying $200 in interest alone a month by the end of the year heh.

>>3418 Then don't lay off the vidya, just negotiate with yourself what you must do before you can boot up the vidya.

>>3423 Not to pry, but it's pretty hard to parse if I don't know the terms of your loan. What exactly is your interest rate on the loan, as well as the size the original size? From personal experience I can say that depending on what week you pay the monthly payment, you pay more or less. To swing 20$ that wildly though seems a touch odd. Is this a car loan? There's the ultra-nightmare scenario of mortgage payments penalizing you for paying the principal early(which you appear to be doing), but that only exists for housing loans as far as I am aware.

>>3428 I'm wondering if I made a mistake with the terms of my loan. However, I do know that my APR is 9.x% and my initial loan was $10,000; it's a personal loan so not a car or something like that. Frankly only paying $40 is lower than I'd expect but the fact it's rapidly increasing is curious. I need to figure out if it's actually charging me more for "overpaying" by the paltry sum I have been because if it is and they refuse to amend that I will refinance immediately. I wonder if I could lump this personal loan in with my car loan which has a significantly lower interest rate. I really wouldn't want to fuck with my pristine credit score too much though.

>>3427 Assuming you don't already know and just don't care, one day you'll realize that modern multiplayer vidya is a scam, and that all the numeric and graphical baubles they'd embedded into their software in mere minutes and have enshrined to your personally-identifying account to enslave and ingratiate you to their software program aren't the symbols of accomplishment they portray themselves as. The only question is do you realize and act on it now or 15 years from now? At what point do you think stopping or greatly moderating your current trajectory will be more painful? It's really something to think about. I was a fairly competitive Counter-Strike player for well over a decade, every day I would come home from work and do nothing but FRAG and it was honestly the greatest shit. I've been there, but the realization hits you later-perhaps too late-that you could have and should have shaved several hours off of that self-indulgent behavior working on yourself in a more holistic way every night, as you could end up feeling very bad about it later while finding yourself ill-equipped for a variety of reasons to make up for that lost time. It's not just the time spent either, but it's the habits and the very real chemical dependency on instantaneous reward being formed that has the potential to ultimately subvert any future attempts at self improvement in other areas that ought to be taken into account. Maybe you don't care about this now and think I'm being a pretentious fag for making this huge post about all this and I don't blame you, but it's only because I've lived through this scenario and am still coping with the fallout to this day that I have so much to say about it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vXj71r-WrQk

>>3431 Not him, but I agree. I probably wasn't as dedicated to videogames as you were, I never played competitively, but I did play for what in hindsight was far too long of a time, most of that time I now think as wasted. Two things in particular usually stick out to me when I think about it, the first being 'cosmetics', typically TF2 hats and shit. All of that is just an obvious dick-measuring contest, and I think I always had that in the back of my mind when I was fucking around with cosmetics, but for some reason I still wasted some of my time trying to get some, just to make myself feel cooler. All of that though? It's all utterly worthless when you inevitably stop playing. I wonder if this sort of feeling will hit CS:GO players after a while, especially those people who freak out over 100$ virtual knives of all things. The 'economies' of the games are a joke too, as the only one who ever makes money or wins in the end is Valve, and nobody in the 'trading community' is capable of recognizing this. The other is that I just got tired of working my ass off to ultimately complete nothing. There's a lot of games where you could try for hours, not having any fun along the way, only to struggle up to finally beating it. Maybe the endorphins make you feel good for at most a day or so, but then you either end up forgetting about it (at best) or feeling like shit that you wasted all of your time doing something that was ultimately pointless in every concievable way. You didn't have fun, and it just feels like you did a pointless chore for someone else. Hell, sometimes this even extends to just getting games to run the way you want them to, like when some terrible old game is forcing mouse accel. I haven't played videogames at all recently, aside from taking 5 or 10 minutes to look at small indie games since the effort put into them tickles me pink. I don't think there's any cure for videogame addiction aside from giving the addict exactly what they want. You can't force yourself to quit, eventually you'll just want to and being distracted by videogames won't be a problem anymore. When you become conscious of how worthless the effort really is, it's only a matter of time. Perhaps you might find a reason to come back, but it won't ever go back to being an addiction.

>>3429 To be fair, it should be called a fee on your statements if they do have that prepayment penalty, as opposed to an interest hike. Casual calculation tells me that your interest payment for a month should be about 75$, it's as odd it was 40$ for a bit as much as it is that it swung up to 100$. I'd wait one more month to see if it increases again and at that point figure out what the hell is going on. >>3431 The fact it's shitty multiplayer vidya is irrelevant to my point. He could be huffing cocaine or an alcoholic for all I care. Waiting one day to quit cold turkey so that you finally feel good enough to start drawing is retarded. Just fucking sit down with yourself and ask yourself "alright, how do I not feel like today was a complete fucking waste of time? How productive do I need to be before I kick back relax and play vidya? How much drawing do I need to do so I don't feel like a lazy guilt-ridden sonovabitch?" Then whatever you decide is appropriate for that day, fucking do it, and enjoy the rest of your time playing vidya. Sure, you didn't spend 14 straight hours dedicating yourself to your craft, but you didn't spend 0 on it either, which is what he is doing right now. The cold turkey method can work, but most people are retarded and need to take things one step at a fucking time so they're not disgusting with themselves and can flex their delayed gratification muscle.

>>3437 I agree. It was getting really late in the night for me when I made that post and I didn't get the chance to emphasize what I'd said earlier in the statement after burying it in several paragraphs of histrionics. The goal isn't to stop doing something you like doing entirely forever by any means; I still play video games myself on occasion, but the idea is to just be able to see through the aspects of it that are meant to get you to play compulsively rather than enjoying the game for the game's sake-and that includes emotional blackmail from friends. My word choice definitely lent to the idea that you should just stop everything and do anything else in the world other than enjoy yourself doing "X", but that wasn't my ultimate intention and in fact I think that kind of thing would be harmful overall.

My feels right now are anger and shame for no fucking reason. I fucking despise my perfectionism, and I hate how it makes me quit so much. I just want to draw for fun, I want to feel good putting lines down. But no. my mind wants to achieve something that doesn't exist in human art because he was raised with two parents who don't even consider the idea that perfectionism is ruinous to your entire fucking life. I try to put something out, I fuck it up, and I >greentexted, and then I attract parasitic fuckheads who one-up me by telling me it's shit, and then offering to do it for me. And then my will to draw is killed before I even put the paper in front of me. I loved drawing as a kid. I loved that time when I didn't give a shit about how good my pencil drawing looked, and how dirty the lines were. I didn't quit every time I go a single step out of line on just the guidelines, I didn't stare at a reference while completely ignoring where my pencil is going on the paper. I didn't have process anxiety or stupid-fucking tunnel vision. I want to draw humans but if the guidelines look even the slightest-bit fucking wrong I give up, my mind wants me to give it all or nothing and I'm so fucking tired of giving up. One anon's advice said to practice circles but my fucking arm won't let me draw a square-sized circle. It's always some stupid fucking oval with a jaggy angle in it. Now? I don't even know if I really have a physical problem with my arm, or it's my stupid fucking perfectionism making me overthink the actual fucking problem. I just want fun to come back and draw beautiful girls and relatable men- and it's so fucking easy to say "just do it anon" but my fucking brain. And then there's the fucking trap I fell into that got me into this giant fucking artistic rut in the first place - hype. I fucking hyped myself up and got high on the thought that I would be seen as decent, not even perfect- just decent. And then I got fucking shat on, I disappeared for months, and now I'm here. I don't want perfect anymore. I want good enough. I just want good enough and I want to be happy with that, why is this so hard?

>>3408 This post isn’t really related to drawing, but I finally found the pdf I was looking for, about 8chan. I remember seeing it on google in 2019 a few months after 8chan died but I forgot the name of the article. Feeling a bit happy ngl. https://arxiv.org/abs/1909.10259

>>3446 Man do I know this feel. That little thing in your brain that tells you if you can't do it the level of the people you idolize then you should just stop doing it entirely that accompanies every flippant line you make on the canvas.

>>3436 >>3431 >>3437 I play vidya too, and used to have issues with them eating up too much of my time. However I lost a lot of interest in them as I got older. Maybe it's age or maybe I built up a resistance for endorphin rush from video games. At this point I only play games that feed my creativity. Things that have interesting art direction, good stories, are fun to explore, have interesting mechanics, novel gimmicks, or gameplay that looks and feels good. All of this gives me at least some inspiration and in turns pushed me to draw. If a game gets tedious, I just drop it or find ways around the tedium. >>3446 What worked for me is re-framing drawing as not something to master at all costs, but mainly as a hobby to distress where you will always have something new to learn and master. Don't fall for being stuck in constant excericise mode. Remember to draw for fun, but also try implementing things you are trying to learn while doing that. Ironically, I started seeing better progress after doing this. >>3448 Thanks, this is an interesting read.

>>3446 >>3456 Can't say I know the feeling, what I am working towards is too important to get caught up in guilt tripping myself every step of the way. >I don't want perfect anymore. I want good enough. I just want good enough and I want to be happy with that, why is this so hard? Just to clarify, are you wanting to pursue art as a hobby or as something else?

>>3465 >Just to clarify, are you wanting to pursue art as a hobby or as something else? Vidya. To avoid giving my privacy away too much, I am working on a vidya project based off an existing animu-style universe and characters. I want to do this myself mostly because I want to go the studio-pixel route of doing mostly-everything myself. I feel like if I hire someone else to do art, I would have to risk the "what ifs" of "are they good enough for this?" "Are they gonna keep up with me?" "am I gonna keep up with them?" "What other dysfunctions am I gonna deal with?". I want the knowhow to see what it actually takes to get shit done, that way, if I do a group project, I can have the foresight to understand the difference between people actually being late because of things taking longer than expected, or if the person is an incompetent fuckwit trying to lie to save face. I know I have issues. I'm trying to meditate to deal with these emotions, but fuck, I'm tired of feeling like I'm going two steps forward and three steps back when it's more likely the other way around. >>3462 Alright, thanks anon. I'll try and see if I can get my mind to adopt this mindset.

I'm tired of the Chinese cringe AIDS

>>3467 >Vidya. To avoid giving my privacy away too much, I am working on a vidya project based off an existing animu-style universe and characters. Okay that doesn't answer my question though. Are you doing this for fun, or are you doing this for some other reason?

>>3462 >Thanks, this is an interesting read. You are welcome. I'm mainly using the information for a story I'm writing in my spare time. Also these 'waiting for validation' captchas suck dick.

>>3469 The cases aren't going down anytime son bro

>>3476 Yeah, and we all know why. Anyone that goes to the hospital for any reason has a substantial chance to be declared "covid positive" no matter what their "covid status" might actually be and have their lungs blown up like a basketball with a ventilator until they explode by our healthcare heroes. All in exchange for a fat government check written out to the hospital's administration for their service.

I WANT A TAN TOMBOY GF WITH BIG BOOBA AND I WANT ONE NOW!

>>3514 The girlfriends were a lie, anon. It was all a ruse by the corporations to keep you placated. Keep them wanting. Keep them working. Keep them buying. But there is no hope, anon. There never was.

>>3515 That's not true! THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE!

>>3511 Honestly I thought covid and lockdowns was going to end last year but it's probably going to end in 2022. I don't trust Boris when he says that lockdown is going to end.

>>3517 https://youtu.be/0-Ic4EN0io4 https://youtu.be/yy-yj3kFrV8 https://youtu.be/FRPF-Iz0bJg

>mfw covid passports are real https://youtu.be/tX2MKX7elUc

WEAR *clap* YOUR *clap* MASK *clap*

I lost $753 leverage trading. Rate.

>>3528 >crypto and stocks aren't volatile enough, I want to get wiped out even faster! I feel like you really have to be lucky to not get totally fucked leverage trading. >just bought 1000 more BAT at $.46 last night btw

>>3408 For some reason some dude on /b/ is sharing cp under the vauge disguise as being some anti pedo crusader. Not really feels, I just find it wierd. Pic unrelated.

>>3529 >I feel like you really have to be lucky to not get totally fucked leverage trading. It's not luck but skill. I'm currently practicing with small amounts so losing isn't really a big deal but I do plan on pouring in more capitals once I get better at it. >>just bought 1000 more BAT at $.46 last night btw I don't know enough about BAT to talk about it.

I haven't had wet dreams in over a month. I will now try to coom biweekly. My plan is to coom as rarely as possible while managing to avoid wet dreams. Rate.

>>3552 That's going to be a "based" from me, compadre.

>making thing on drawpile, going pretty well >server starts niggering and won't let me reconnect >motivation status: lost Guess I'll finish it up locally and maybe copy over the difference later, but man, it's just not the same.

>>3408 trying the easy peasy method. my art and life is stagnant enough. it's doable, right bros?

I lost over $4000. I had a few runs with $1000 in unrealized gain but I would always get too greedy and end up losing it all. Looking back now I think the main reason for my losses is that I get too emotional so in order to combat this I wrote a program and a few algorithms to help me trade. I did some backtesting and they are quite profitable. Now instead of looking at the candle chart all day I can have my machine lose all my money for me. I can at last focus on improving my drawings skills WHILE gambling my money away. I have no regrets. Rate.

>>3565 I watched my fat BAT stack go from over $100,000 down to like $35,000. Feels detached man, I have no intention to sell any time soon, but knowing that I might not "make it" until I'm literally 40 or older if ever is depressing

>>3566 You are gonna make it for sure. Buy and hold is one of the most effective strategy. HODL beats most of my algorithms.

>>3565 Not gonna ask you your standards for you algorithms, but what are you attaching your algorithms to that allows automatic trades? Binance?

>>3568 I use my exchange's api.

>>3571 Which exchange is that?

>>3574 >guy loses a shit load of money playing around with bots and leveraging >"Dude tell me how you do that"

>>3574 Binance Bitfinex and Kucoin are all good for this purpose and allow high frequency trading. >>3576 $4000 is nothing. I still have a lot of money to invest.

>>3576 4000$ isn't that much in crypto-kiddie land. Maybe if he lost 5 figures in a single move like >>3566 I'd be concerned. I've traded in cypto, but didn't know I could automate it.

>>3584 I didn't lose anything, that was nothing but unrealized profit. The only time I'll sell is if in doing so I won't have to work anymore, otherwise there's no point. What am I going to do? Buy a new car or computer? I can already do that with my existing salary.

How do you justify not giving up? I used to want to make art for my own vidya, but it increasingly feels like by the time I git gud if ever there won't be any niches or openings left for people who haven't been industry-grasping or SNSfagging for the past 7-10 years. It might be different if I were younger, but I feel like I've missed my chance.

>>3598 Are you me? Also I don't know, man. I haven't drawn on a consistent basis for well over a year now outside of one day a week on the drawpile. I am completely demoralized and despondent. I refuse to formally "give up" though, my schedule at work is loosening a bit and I'm optimistic things will change for the better, soon.

>>3598 >How do you justify not giving up? Because I only have this one life, and I have my directives clarified. There's nothing better I could be working towards, and conversely, nothing worse I could be running away from. >I used to want to make art for my own vidya, but it increasingly feels like by the time I git gud if ever there won't be any niches or openings left for people who haven't been industry-grasping or SNSfagging for the past 7-10 years. It might be different if I were younger, but I feel like I've missed my chance. If you make something good, people will come. Cruelty Squad looks like a child vomited all over a N64 cartridge, but people are all in a (indie-sized) tizzy over that. There is no "timing" concerning these matters. If you think you can be doing something better in your time (not for any bullshit moralizing reasons, you, personally, feel like you could be spending your time better) than do that instead, keep doing that until you find the one thing that doesn't feel like it could be a better use of your time, and by definition it is the best use of your time.

>>3598 >fulfilled a request on /v/ and made some anons happy >made a silly comic that made some friends laugh >anytime an anon says something along the lines of: "nice progress, keep it up" I can't give up, I gotta do it for them.

>>3604 based and comfy goals-pilled

>>3602 >There's nothing better I could be working towards, and conversely, nothing worse I could be running away from. You're objectively right, but it's still hard to avoid comparing, especially since it helps find where I need to improve. >>3604 I wish I could be carefree in that way, but I have a specific point I want to reach and I'm too much of a perfectionist to settle.

>>3607 >You're objectively right, but it's still hard to avoid comparing, especially since it helps find where I need to improve. I didn't say anywhere in my post not to compare yourself, but you are the only person that has your genes, the environment you were raised in, and has made all the choices you have made is yourself. If you find someone else whose personality or creations interest or make you admire them, articulate to yourself what you are finding admirable, and figure out how to get you yourself to get those personality traits or those parts of their creations you find admirable in your own work.

>>3598 I am getting old. I need to get out of house and make friends, need a hobby that allows me to relax and avoid computer screens, and want to have at least one thing outside of work that I can excel at. Drawing ticks all of these boxes despite decline in my abilities due to over a decade of neglect. >>3607 >You're objectively right, but it's still hard to avoid comparing, especially since it helps find where I need to improve. Learning from others is the only benefit of comparing yourself to them. Other than that it is not healthy too overdo it. What stopped me is realizing that sooner or later there will always be someone better, that while they are goo at art they might be shit at something else I can do, and the fact that people tend to only post their best work while hiding all fuckups, shortcuts, and lying to make themselves look better. Only person you should compare yourself to frequently and try to outdo is your past self. That's the only valuable yardstick for how good you are, and what progress you are making over time.

Holy rubber gloves batman, do I need to study hands.

Why does this site look like total garbage all of the sudden? I feel like it looked normal when I was using my tablet computer earlier.

>>3651 It seems to have fixed itself, thanks mods crisis averted.

>Man I'll never git gud >look back at drawings from a year ago >mfw I guess there's always hope after all

>>3703 I feel the same. Truth is that you have the potential. Many of us have it. Its just that we can never force ourselves to be at our peak. We lack pic related. When you genuine tryhard you can achieve greatness. Sometimes you just have to clench you buttcheeks and go all out. Just to have peace of mind you are as good as you like to believe.

>>3703 I involuntarily winced at artwork someone showed me in person before. Feels badman, I usually try to be supportive but I think for some reason I had set my expectations of what I was about to see too high and when it was super beginner stuff I couldn't hide my disappointment.

I really enjoy drawing and painting the academic nude. I really do. I love observing the folds and shadow shapes of the body, and seeing how body parts like the "flank" of the oblique squashes and stretches. I love noticing how skin reflects sunlight, the various greens, blues, pinks, yellows, and reds on White people I can paint, it's all very fascinating for me. I don't care if it's a male or female figure, I just like drawing the nude body. But everyone I see commenting on my works just say things like: "he's hot," or "that ass." The people that want to commission me have messed up ideas like expansion fetishes. I try to be reasonable and say I just don't draw explicit content. But I don't know if what I'm painting is contributing to their sick minds. It reminds me of a thread on cuckchan where anons were posting artists with "barely disguised fetishes" and they posted Bouguereau, Joaquin Bastida, Henry Scott Tuke, etc. I'm tired of it all and it makes me want to stop. I'll have to just cancel my current client's commission since what he wants is borderline NSFW, and all his bookmarks are explicit content.

>>3887 There will always be degenerates on the Internet anon, keep your chin up. Continue drawing the beautiful human figure, it is a magnificent part of Creation and you are right to marvel at it. The fact that they consider your work attractive shows how attentive you are to recreating the human figure. Never give in to their coomer cravings, but accept that a true illustration of human anatomy will always make somebody somewhere go awooga.

>>3887 DEHUMANIZE YOURSELF AND FACE TO FURSHIT But in seriousness, maybe start putting these people in sweet landscapes or something? If you want to avoid leches, it might be good to distance yourself from them in some way. Since most porn artists are either lazy or inept in other areas of painting, you'll likely be able to avoid their clientele by using proper settings and not just pretty bobs and vagene in a void. This is admittedly just speculation, though.

>>3887 Set your selling price to draw inflation and other shit at 1 million. If fuckers can't afford, fuck 'em, if fuckers can afford, you have 1 million.

>>3889 Thanks, I needed to hear that. I figure that once my art is out there, it's basically open to anyone to their own interpretation. So someone will value qualities such as line, shape, color, and value, while another will value things like feet, eyes, the face, or anything they may have an "attraction" to. >>3890 You make a good point. I'm starting to put my figures in minimal backgrounds with repeating patterns, drapery, or environments. I think that'll help the porn-addicted normalfags think: "Okay, maybe this isn't fap material." It's worth a shot.

>first day of live figure drawing >never done this shit before >completely overwhelmed >busting garbage out like mad >learning so god damn much If my arm weren't in agony working 2 hours straight I'd be on Cloud 9 right now. Can't wait for what it feels like when I'm actually good at this garbage.

>>4024 Lemme so thos' figgas, nigga

>>4026 Can't today, left them in storage and too lazy. I'll take another look tomorrow and post any not objectively awful.

>>4024 King.

>Be me >Go to art school >Yeah I know how dare I fall for the degree jew >Really just want to get out of the house because: >Have retard parents >Mom tells me campus won't be open because Corona >The problem is that Universities and such all expect students to be competent enough to not need to have everything spelled out for them >Unfortunately she is >She took two weeks to apply to a grant because she was too stupid to just apply online and thought they needed a phone call first >You didn't >"WELL I GUESS WE JUST WASTED TWO WEEKS OH WELL" >Haven't applied for housing yet >Not even sure if housing is covered by all the loans I've already taken out >Get an email not even sure when just looked at the content and died inside >The teacher literally starts with >"See you in class IN PERSON NEXT WEEK >Not sure what the fuck to do now >Not sure whether or not it's viable to even do anything >Or if in the worst case scenario I'll even get offered online substitute classes because I LIVE CITIES AWAY FROM CAMPUS I FUCKING LOVE THE AMERICAN SCHOOL SYSTEM I FUCKING LOVE MY PARENTS ''I FUCKING LOVE THE FACT THAT MY LIFE IS LITERALLY JUST A SADIE BROTHERS SERIES OF UNFORTUNATE EVENTS RAPIDLY HITTING ME IN THE FACE WITH ZERO CLUE OF WHAT THE FUCK I SHOULD BE DOING'' ''THANK YOU GOD''

>>4032 I warned you about art school bro I TOLD YOU DOG

>>4032 You should withdrawal and get a refund retard for the love of God.

>>4032 >college housing Enjoying retarded faggots and niggers who are just there to party getting black-out drunk and blasting music, playing sports in the hallway, and getting into loud arguments and fighting late at night.

>>4032 I waste at least 2 hours a day commuting so you have all of my sympathies. Unfortunately our only hope at this point is for the delta variant to strike and trigger another lock down. I really hope the schizos who keep freaking out about delta variant are right. Another year of lock down and work from home would be great...

>>4032 Not gonna lie my man, but you should tell the idea of college to fuck off. You'd probably do more art by buying a computer and fucking off to a hipster small town for 3 years. If you do need a degree to sneak past HR, make it a super short 1-year/2-year degree and that's it.

>>4026 Posted in practice thread. >>4042

>>4032 If you want to go to college, don't go for art. Total waste. People that go to art school are massive faggots with no skill or talent. You can go for a real major and do art on the side or just don't go and spend your time building a portfolio. Art school is for people who can't motivate themselves to try a bunch of stuff so they can "build" a portfolio with a gun to their head. In some cases, art school makes you worse by ingraining bad, but trendy, habits.

>>4032 Reminder that you are statistically *less* likely to work in Art if you do go to Art School instead of just ignoring college entirely, or getting a degree in something else.

>>4050 this tbh fam. I just learned that even Dave Rapoza was self-taught as well. https://daverapoza.carbonmade.com/about

>>4041 Legitimately preferable to my current living situation. I'd sooner live next door to a literal crack house full of the mangiest motherfuckers alive if it meant I get my own room. You have no idea how bad things are. >>4044 >You'd probably do more art by buying a computer and fucking off to a hipster small town for 3 years. I suck at digital art and cannot afford to move to a small city short of walking 50 miles on foot. >>4051 Freelance Illustration+Cartoon are not what I'm looking to do. If you cut them out you'd probably get less than "1,200,000" working artists to a far far smaller number, sub 500,000. More importantly you didn't read the reason I listed in my post. On that note I guess my choices are to ask whether or not housing is open in tuition costs, but at this point I doubt it, I apparently paid 10k less than I need to for semester and that must have been housing costs. Honestly at this point things have gotten so bad that I hope some True Romance shit goes down and conditions from corona, bureaucratic systems, and my parents all collapse so horribly that I make it out somehow in the crossfire, but I expect things to get worse honestly. I could also just ask now but I don't know how to inquire about that without sounding like an ass.

>>4052 Concept artists are in demand and what they do isn't illustration or cartooning. Working artists also includes actors, poets, novelists, anything that is not a "traditional vocation". If you want to leave the house either go to college for a real degree that can at least help you as a back up career, or just bite the bullet and get an actual job. If you're not into digital you don't even want Art School then. Find an atelier to take your sorry fucking ass and teach you how to wipe it.

>>4052 Get a job and live in a van (unironically) or get the cheapest, shittiest apartment ever. I'm old and I still live with my parents because they have health (and psychological) issues that makes my living with them pretty necessary-I also take care of the dog. I love them but they're retarded, starting fights with eachother over nothing regularly, it's very distracting and absolutely fucking pathetic behavior that I'm pretty much forced to stop everything to mediate. It's not 100% bad by any means, but in my years prior living alone or with roommates things were much better for me as far as art and my own mental health goes. You're not wrong for wanting to be independent of your rowdy retarded boomer parents, but you'd probably be better off getting a job and taking pay-as-you-go drawing and painting courses instead of a formal college. It's too late now though it sounds like so just try and make the most of it by getting an art gf. >>4052 >Find an atelier to take your sorry fucking ass and teach you how to wipe it. This but in a less rude way. Ateliers are good even if I don't have much to do with the methodology, myself.

>>4053 >Concept artists are in demand and what they do isn't illustration or cartooning. https://www.artbreeder.com/ For now. That bubble pops once mass media becomes so corporate they get replaced by AI or babby's first digital modeling program, it's already happened for the car industry, or mass media like the MCU and video games dies out in the end anyway. And quite frankly I'd rather not spend my time listening to some studio executives regurgitated demands for decades onward until the inevitable collapse and just copy Ralph McQuarrie and Blizzard style over and over. If we're talking about demand then everyone here might as well just become a hentai artist. I can't unfortunately as I cannot put any eroticism in my work even when everyone is fully nude. My art is very mannerist, there's zero ecstasy or emotion in my work and I've stylistically been building that up intentionally. No chance there. >Working artists also includes actors, poets, novelists, anything that is not a "traditional vocation". Yeah meaning the numbers are even smaller like I said, literal filler information. >If you want to leave the house either go to college for a real degree that can at least help you as a back up career, or just bite the bullet and get an actual job. If you're not into digital you don't even want Art School then. Find an atelier to take your sorry fucking ass and teach you how to wipe it. A college degree majoring in what? Next you'll tell me all college is a scam and to join a trade, then some faggot will tell me to invest in crypto, then some other fag will tell me to just get a job at McDonald's. I suck at STEM, I hate labor and nowadays even basic labor needs an engineering degree, there's no way I'm even touching medical school, and regarding politics, well as Hitler taught us all, we need even less of a education to do great things there as Juris Doctorate in political sciences is likely the most worthless degree I can think of, I can use the 12 years it'd take me to get it to overthrow the US government and implement myself as dictator within 6 then die within 4 after the Israeli-Eurasian allies storm the America's. > If you're not into digital you don't even want Art School then. Find an atelier to take your sorry fucking ass and teach you how to wipe it. I'm good with traditional and there's nothing that an atelier can teach me to do at this point, I'm in NY so right off the bat the one atelier in the state is straight up as costly as any one university and from what I can tell, does not even take grants. Ateliers are mostly just strict life drawing classes anyway, I excel mostly in the opposite. Now knowing you, you're likely saying >Wow it sounds like you have the perfect storm of benefits and downsides to have the perfect clusterfuck that can go nowhere. I know. There's no real way to fix this thus far I kind of just have to accept death. Which is good as I am very open to the idea of death, it has gradually become more comforting as the years have gone by. I'm 500% certain I will be dead before age 23 if not from starvation, most certainly from suicide. Honestly I'm just hoping I get Van Go'd when I die as lost potential. On the upside if I end up having to travel 30 miles back and forth daily then at least I'll have multiple chances to throw myself in front of a subway or something so I can just end it all immediately. But honestly dude at this point I'm just chilling, I guess if there's nothing I can do I'll just starve myself until I die or something I don't know, it gradually becomes harder and harder to think of any other solution besides defeatism of the highest order and just leaving this realm entirely. >>4054 >Get a job and live in a van (unironically) or get the cheapest, shittiest apartment ever. I might honestly, at the cost of severe sleep deprivation and malnutrition though. At least It'll kill me without suicide though. There is honestly nothing more promising at this point than involuntary death coming over me when I least expect it, honestly at this point I just really really really want to fucking die. >It's too late now though it sounds like so just try and make the most of it by getting an art gf. Oh yeah funny thing, literally everyone at the school is a non white foreigner. Even if admittedly speaking /pol/ and this cancerous shithole hadn't drilled me with years of anti miscegenation information influx then it'd be hard to so much as speak to one of them anyway. The one white woman I have met thus far was significantly older than me and was like two years ahead academically, then proceeded to talk down to one of the foreign students who drew girls in bikini's for her art project for 5 minutes giving a unironic "SJW EPIC COMPILATION #54890 BEN SHAPIRO COMPALATION" tier speech about how drawing a bikini is objectifying and demeaning to women. The person who drew the girls in bikini's shooting guns by the way, was a female themselves. I'm not going near any of them with a 10 foot pole. So to recap: >My social future is dead >My economic future is dead >My academic future is about to die Honestly if there's anything logical I've deduced from this thread thus far is that I should just kill myself when I go on Tuesday, I should honestly just lay flat in a position that puts my head over the train platform so last second so the train crushes my skull when it comes I hold no real reason to live, everything has been gradually taken from me and I'm not even mad, I've just become so numbed to everything that suicide is really the only logical choice left.

>>4055 >I've just become so numbed to everything that suicide is really the only logical choice left. Shut the fuck up right now! As someone who was once suicidal themselves in a college filled with evil bitches just like the ones in yours, I can safely say that suicide is the most retarded solution to any of life's problems. You and I both know how much we love having pity parties. You hate the situation you're in, but it feels almost good to beat yourself up for it. It almost feels good thinking about how you want to kill yourself, as if that would be a just punishment for your failure. That's what I felt back then, and I'm sure you're feeling that too some degree too. Well, that pity party stuff is retarded and bullshit. Existence on this Earth is badass no matter how much it sucks, the last person who should be taking you out of it is yourself. Separate yourself from what's making you miserable, no matter the monetary cost. As long as you can eat, drink, sleep, and bathe somewhere, you're golden and can live life as you see fit. Don't adjust your perspective to fit in the sick world we live in, it will only leave you in the agony you feel now. Take back the reins, even if they're laced with thorns. Live, anon. Live, with the goal of of one day leaving this world satisfied you've done something worth living for.

>>4032 Why are you blaming your mother for something you should be applying for? >>4055 >I'm 500% certain I will be dead before age 23 if not from starvation, most certainly from suicide Anon, I've been there. I'm willing to bet a lot of us have. This line of thinking is poisonous. It encourages us to wallow in our misery instead of even attempting to make our position better. The truth is, should you be lucky, that those "I'll be dead by XX" numbers come and go and for a variety of reasons we end up adding a bit to that number every time we pass it, only to be in a worse position than we started in due to that line of thought. Instead, I want you to think of what you want and how you'll get it in 5, 10, 15, 20 years. Please anon. I realized the only thing my misery was doing was snowballing into more misery late into the game and thanks to that I had been twiddling my thumbs at the at the starting line when I should have been running. Even if you fail the worst that can happen is that you starve to death, which was your original plan.

>>4057 >Instead, I want you to think of what you want and how you'll get it in 5, 10, 15, 20 years I can't because what I really want I'll never get. As for everything else I guess it's feasible but won't bring me any joy.

>>4058 What do you really want, anon? I'll tell you what I wanted, I wanted a family. A loving wife and a busload of kids, I wanted this since I was a kid. I got hurt really bad at an age where I was too young to handle it and I convinced myself that what I wanted was impossible and other miserable fucks on the internet reinforced these thoughts. I gave up for years, just wallowing and progressing absolutely no where. But I swear to you anon, I'm gonna make it even if it kills me. It's hard, it's really hard to pull yourself out of the impossible pit. The first step is working out how to resolve the barriers that make your dream "impossible".

>>4059 >What do you really want, anon? Something illegal. Anyway it's pointless to meander on about this kind of stuff, it doesn't help the situation at all.

>>4060 >Something illegal Please tell me you're referring to drugs.

>>4061 No. Anyway, how do I go about asking as to what housing options are and if it's already included for tuition without coming off as a desperate asshole to my university? Should I do it in person or online?

>>4055 >And quite frankly I'd rather not spend my time listening to some studio executives regurgitated demands for decades onward until the inevitable collapse and just copy Ralph McQuarrie and Blizzard style over and over. Okay, well then, I'm done playing guessing games with what you actually want to do, other than kill yourself. Tell us, exactly, what it is you fucking want to do. >A college degree majoring in what? I can't think for you moron, use your fucking head what is the most bearable option. >Next you'll tell me all college is a scam and to join a trade This would also unironically be a good option if your only goal is "do not live at home" you piece of shit. >then some faggot will tell me to invest in crypto One step above gambling but sure probably a better investment than Art School. >then some other fag will tell me to just get a job at McDonald's. Still better than Art School. >I'm good with traditional and there's nothing that an atelier can teach me to do at this point >doesn't want to do digital >already good at traditional Now I seriously don't understand your fucking problem, you're telling me you're trained up enough to be a working artist but have decided to take even *more* schooling you don't need? So what? You can "network" with people? >In NY LEAVE NY THEN >>Wow it sounds like you have the perfect storm of benefits and downsides to have the perfect clusterfuck that can go nowhere. Well yes that's what life looks like when you're ready to kill yourself. Remove the wow because your story is typical not special retard. What exactly are you trying to do that Art School will help with other than >not live with parents because there are far fucking cheaper options. >Honestly if there's anything logical I've deduced from this thread thus far is that I should just kill myself when I go on Tuesday, I should honestly just lay flat in a position that puts my head over the train platform so last second so the train crushes my skull when it comes I hold no real reason to live, everything has been gradually taken from me and I'm not even mad, I've just become so numbed to everything that suicide is really the only logical choice left. I legitimately could not care less that you're suicidal. I would prefer you not, but I can not care less. I can't give you reasons to live. I can't tell you life isn't going to be one horrendously painful problem after another, under all circumstances. All I can offer is to listen to you bitch, and give you advice if you want it and how to solve the next fucking problem. Because the problems you have are yours, only you can save yourself, and all I can do is offer an ear, and solutions. Which do you want right now?

>>4060 Drugs? Mass murder? Pedoshit? All in Minecraft of course. You're on an anonymous imageboard my guy. Grab a tor node if you're paranoid about the feds.

>>4062 Just fucking call them. It's their job. Do you have a phone? If not borrow one and call them. Do they not have a phone? Sounds like a scam university. t. is currently in Uni with a spouse in Uni >desperate asshole Why the hell would anyone care that you sound desperate? What are you projecting onto these other people you socially anxious retard?

>>4063 >Okay, well then, I'm done playing guessing games with what you actually want to do, other than kill yourself. Tell us, exactly, what it is you fucking want to do. So much of a cluster fuck that it's honestly hard to explain. Paint. Everything? >Now I seriously don't understand your fucking problem, you're telling me you're trained up enough to be a working artist but have decided to take even *more* schooling you don't need? So what? You can "network" with people? Yes. I am economically fucking illiterate I don't know the first thing about selling paintings or any work then get mad when I see modern works that I could have done better in 15 minutes at the British Museum. >>4065 >Just fucking call them. Unlikely since I'm already anxious enough I guess I'll just have to ask by email but fuck upon further introspection I don't think I'll even get a definitive answer and just get fucking sent to a general link, the general answer to housing questions has always been two sentences.

>>4066 >Everything? Yes. Everything. I don't care if you give me a mound of verbal vomit about how much you love drawing donut anuses and hyper dicks, just stop being coy you utter faggot. >Yes. Well now we're making progress. Okay, so you want to network, let's start with the most important problem, what do *you* offer other people that makes it worth *their* time to interact with you? Do you know how many social gatherings you need to attend to network properly? How many people you'll need to keep track of? And you can't even pick up the god damn phone to ask the university if they properly charged you 10k$?! Let's start small shall we, hope about you practice calling a person whose job it is to give a shit about you and then we can discuss networking after you've mastered that basic social interaction. >I am economically fucking illiterate I don't know the first thing about selling paintings or any work then get mad when I see modern works that I could have done better in 15 minutes at the British Museum. They don't teach you that for art school, for definitive proof, observe this retard's thread >>3967 who is going into a PhD in Art. He doesn't know the first fucking thing about selling art and he has a fucking Master's for all the good that did him. This is your fucking reference point for what Art School teaches you. >Unlikely since I'm already anxious enough I guess I'll just have to ask by email but fuck upon further introspection I don't think I'll even get a definitive answer and just get fucking sent to a general link, the general answer to housing questions has always been two sentences. This is why email is bad option, so you've got two options. Stew in your anxiety, and let it get worse and worse and worse as times goes by, or, you can call them and clear it up right this minute. Every minute you don't make a decision is just you choosing the former to let the anxiety get bigger. You are always choosing the former until you choose the later. So make a fucking decision, how do you want your anxiety to go away? By calling them, or making it bigger over time?

>>4067 >hope about *how about

>>4062 God have mercy on your retarded soul, you mentally ill wannabe artist

>>4055 >I'm in NY Enjoy getting fucking shot.

>Actually no tuition does not include housing >Good luck with taking the train to school each day, don't be late. :^) >Alternatively you can swap out all your classes for the only 3 that are online, enjoy. It's over. All I can think of doing right now is getting a job with only online classes, I cannot fathom a single job available that lets me not work from 9 to 5 on a daily basis for school. Ok well I guess I can, nightshift and such, but I'd have to look them up, I guess I can be a grocery stocker. Hopefully they'll let me remove all the classes I just got thus far even the required one's. I'll end up getting maybe 3 hours of sleep a day, but this is fine, if mangaka can do it, I can too and might as well start now. I guess I might not need to even change classes as my outcome is the same. >>4070 Actually the shot is literally negatable in this situation but honestly at this point I wish we went in lockdown again. >>4067 >They don't teach you that for art school, for definitive proof, observe this retard's thread >>3967 who is going into a PhD in Art. He doesn't know the first fucking thing about selling art and he has a fucking Master's for all the good that did him. This is your fucking reference point for what Art School teaches you. So where do you learn that shit? >>4069 Not thus far, no.

>>4073 >doesn't say what he wants to do in detail Fuck you. >All I can think of doing right now is getting a job with only online classes, I cannot fathom a single job available that lets me not work from 9 to 5 on a daily basis for school. None that pay well of course. >I'll end up getting maybe 3 hours of sleep a day, but this is fine, if mangaka can do it, I can too and might as well start now. I guess I might not need to even change classes as my outcome is the same. >wants to work a full time job and go to classes >can't even call a university to give him an answer to a basic question Have you considered becoming a functional human being before exploring this endeavor? >Hopefully they'll let me remove all the classes I just got thus far even the required one's. They do. Take a look at the college calendar, should have a "last day to withdrawal and get a full refund". Hint: This is your last day to withdrawal and get a full refund. >So where do you learn that shit? Actually attempting to sell it and learning as you go. There's some books on the subject of selling in general, but it's an art (heh) not a science. Anyone who can regularly sell art doesn't need to teach others for pay now do they?

>>4074 >>doesn't say what he wants to do in detail >Fuck you. Oh right sorry I guess I was too busy wallowing in self despair to give a shit. I suppose everything. This then that. I'd like to be a painter in the classical vein, sell paintings that'll be exhibited, do fresco painting on the ceiling, sell whatever I can including drawings although that seems harder. I would at some point like to make an expedition into serialized comic/manga works in my own art style but that part is years ahead. Take whatever opportunities I can get, be a jack of all trades. >None that pay well of course. So let's say I drop school. What the fuck job does pay well? I have all of 0 skills or education out of art. >They do. Take a look at the college calendar, should have a "last day to withdrawal and get a full refund". Hint: This is your last day to withdrawal and get a full refund. I'm not sure if I'd want to fully drop out, I've had fun thus far there, but at this point my mental sanity is wholly reliant only on my living situation. >Have you considered becoming a functional human being before exploring this endeavor? Now that is the most unlikely outcome of this entire situation. >Actually attempting to sell it and learning as you go. WHERE THE FUCK DO I SEEL ART EVERYONE SAYS "JUST SELL ART JUST SELL THE ART YOU DOUBLE NIGGER" BUT WHERE DO I SELL THE ART WHY ARE YOU MAKING AN ABSTRACT STATEMENT LIKE I'M SUPPOSED TO KNOW WHAT THE FUCK YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT WJHAT TEHE FJUACK AARE YUO TAALKING ABBOUT CWISTOPHUH

>>4075 >I'd like to be a painter in the classical vein, sell paintings that'll be exhibited, do fresco painting on the ceiling, sell whatever I can including drawings although that seems harder. I would at some point like to make an expedition into serialized comic/manga works in my own art style but that part is years ahead. Take whatever opportunities I can get, be a jack of all trades. This seems like a reversal of order. It would be far easier to monetize a comic and then really get into painting then vice versa. Furthermore I'm pretty certain modern architecture and labor laws means no one pays anyone to paint ceilings. I can't think of any religious institutions that do these days, and anything corporate is going to go full modern. >I'm not sure if I'd want to fully drop out, I've had fun thus far there, but at this point my mental sanity is wholly reliant only on my living situation. Withdrawal from classes is not withdrawing from the school entirely, it just means you aren't taking those classes specifically. If you are 100% committed to online school, go ahead and add those. If you don't know how to do any of these things, stop being an autistic fuck and call the school asking for any to help your sorry ass. They actively want your money so they *want* you to ask questions if you're a retard. >What the fuck job does pay well? >I have all of 0 skills or education out of art. Hard labor if you have zero skills. I would also recommend moving out of the shithole that is NY as you'll get lower rent prices too. >Now that is the most unlikely outcome of this entire situation. It doesn't have to be. >>4075 >EVERYONE SAYS "JUST SELL ART JUST SELL THE ART YOU DOUBLE NIGGER" BUT WHERE DO I SELL THE ART WHY ARE YOU MAKING AN ABSTRACT STATEMENT LIKE I'M SUPPOSED TO KNOW WHAT THE FUCK YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT WJHAT TEHE FJUACK AARE YUO TAALKING ABBOUT CWISTOPHUH You say you dislike digital, so I'm assuming you don't want the easy way of drawing poon and getting pervert dollars. If you have physical media. You have options, you could approach galleries to show off your shit. You could also set up an online store to sell physical copies, though the logistics of people actually finding/caring about your site is low. Some hipster restaurants will hang up people's art with a price tag in case some dumbfuck thinks it's worth keeping. You could actually make a social life for yourself. Consider extorting friends and family first or at least getting feedback from them why they don't give a shit about your art.

>>4076 >This seems like a reversal of order. It would be far easier to monetize a comic and then really get into painting then vice versa. Furthermore I'm pretty certain modern architecture and labor laws means no one pays anyone to paint ceilings. I can't think of any religious institutions that do these days, and anything corporate is going to go full modern. Not sure how to monetize a comic. >No one pays anyone to pain ceilings. Well not with that attitude. >Withdrawal from classes is not withdrawing from the school entirely, it just means you aren't taking those classes specifically. If you are 100% committed to online school, go ahead and add those. If you don't know how to do any of these things, stop being an autistic fuck and call the school asking for any to help your sorry ass. They actively want your money so they *want* you to ask questions if you're a retard. True enough I guess. >Hard labor if you have zero skills. I would also recommend moving out of the shithole that is NY as you'll get lower rent prices too. What does that even entail I have zero skills from what I can tell even hard labor requires high school level math knowledge so you don't fuck up a building. I don't even have that. >If you have physical media. You have options, you could approach galleries to show off your shit. Well how do you do that, I'm not sure how to cold approach galleries for that kind of stuff. The rest is just unlikely, I have no friends or extended family, do not know the first thing about having an artist website and frankly hate the idea, the last thing I've thought of is just doing what Basquiat did and painting illegally on walls to market myself or make a giant fuck off painting on a sheet and hang it over a sky scraper after trespassing.

>>4077 >Not sure how to monetize a comic. Patreon, twitter whoring, paying for a website, selling physical copies. Takes a long time to pick up steam usually though. >Well not with that attitude. If you can find them go ahead, I'm not saying they don't exist I'm saying I can't see anyone who hires anyone to do that. You can make it a passion project, but those cost *you* money. >What does that even entail I have zero skills from what I can tell even hard labor requires high school level math knowledge so you don't fuck up a building. I don't even have that. First off, you didn't graduate High School but you managed to get into college? Second, I don't know if New York is different from the rest of the world but construction, janitor service, etc. doesn't require anything past High School and may not even require High School. Second moving entails moving, which means gathering all your things and moving to where jobs are instead of living in a shithole. >Well how do you do that, I'm not sure how to cold approach galleries for that kind of stuff. Well duh, you wouldn't be here if you didn't. Here's a hint, fucking try. >The rest is just unlikely, I have no friends or extended family, do not know the first thing about having an artist website and frankly hate the idea, the last thing I've thought of is just doing what Basquiat did and painting illegally on walls to market myself or make a giant fuck off painting on a sheet and hang it over a sky scraper after trespassing. Then fucking do it faggot. Go, do it right now. You sound like you have a better plan go do it.

>>4055 >A college degree majoring in what? Get a cs degree. You will take a few math courses but they are manageable even if you are iq 89. Go to a college with internship partnership with big companies so you can start getting paid internship in your second year. Paid internship will net you at least $10k per year. >then some faggot will tell me to invest in crypto You should unironically invest in crypto in around 20 days from now. That goes for everyone btw. I do not know why you are in an art school when you are so poor. Art should be pursued at your own leisure when you have ample free time and money.

>>4082 Why 20 days specifically?

>>4082 I fucking suck at computers though dude, I got an F for my required digital arts class because I couldn't manage to use Adobe programs, imagine how bad I'll do at trying to code. Everyone says "Do STEM" like everyone has the capacity to STEMcel like no tomorrow the way they do. The one thing I can do on it is play games, and it's only some games. Are you telling me to become a e celeb or something then? Because your statement is forcefully reduced to that by default when speaking to me. >>4081 >Patreon, twitter whoring, paying for a website, selling physical copies. Takes a long time to pick up steam usually though. I fucking hate digital distribution and is not what I meant at all. I'd sooner wageslave for capeshit before I degrade myself to webcomic level. >Then fucking do it faggot. Go, do it right now. You sound like you have a better plan go do it. But as a last resort. I'd much rather work with a gallery obviously but where the fuck do I apply to have my work showcased.

>>4089 >I'd much rather work with a gallery obviously but where the fuck do I apply to have my work showcased. I don't know, perhaps, the galleries? Ever considered calling one and asking them questions about this?

>>4089 >I fucking hate digital distribution and is not what I meant at all. I'd sooner wageslave for capeshit before I degrade myself to webcomic level. As opposed to "can not call a university about a 10k$ purchase" or "ask another human being how to apply for a gallery" level of degradation? I'm sorry pal I think you need to realize how low you currently are. As a question will you refuse any payments outside cash or check because those rely on digital networks too? You sure are giving yourself one hell of a problem set.

>>4090 I'm not totally certain I can even get a check up on my works to see if they're worth selling by anyone I'd call, at best I'd get a referral. >>4091 >As a question will you refuse any payments outside cash or check because those rely on digital networks too? You sure are giving yourself one hell of a problem set. I don't even have a bank account but, no?

So it seems I found a way to weaponize my boomers. Instead of hiding in my room like the NEET I wish I was I just work right here in the living room with them 30 feet away. Love them as I do they're annoying as fuck, but being in a constant state of agitation from their boomer hijinks has made me 100% more productive than I'd otherwise be hiding from them in my room and even makes their endless, constant stream of interruptions more manageable because I don't have to yell back and forth from my room with neither of us understanding the other until a long time has elapsed. This is truly, sincerely awful, but I'm more productive now than I have been in a long time so I think this is how it's going to have to be for the foreseeable future. God have mercy on my soul. They're blasting Kiss and Doobie Brothers at mind breaking volumes and asking me to give them the abridged life story of every band member, if you'd like some context for how my life is going right now. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o1BqHjNafRk

>>4094 For the record yeah I'm being a little hyperbolic and I am actually very glad they're in such good spirits. I enjoy my parents' company for the most part when they aren't bitching at eachother for no reason, but from the context of someone who'd never made it terribly far in any kind of discipline this lifestyle is much less than ideal. I don't think they're ever going to be able to live alone again though so it is what it is. It's not much worse than the roommate situations I'd dealt with in the past I guess.

Welp I might have to endure severe sleep deprivation but I managed to cut down travel costs at least and moved all my classes to one day, maybe two if my drop appeal for the shitty "required" one isn't accepted, that's something, or maybe it isn't. I will never know. It's probably a good chance to network in the city as well with galleries or if things get really bad start graffiti marketing like the street urchin I am. >>4094 Give me a minute.

>>4094 >>4096 Looking good, DaVinci Anon. >File size too large. Fuck off Acid.

>>4098 >8192x8192 image Isn't 32 MB the upload size limit? That's crazy high for an imageboard man, count your blessings.

>>4099 I thought it was 50, fuck you Acid. Whatever, when the time comes I can sell it full quality as an NFT or whatever to some scrub. The original is apparently 40 mb, the version you see now is believe it or not 6.

>>4082 >You should unironically invest in crypto in around 20 days from now. That goes for everyone btw. So buy on these days, does that mean if I am holding I should sell? Also, what is this based on?

>>4055 In regards to killing yourself by 23: I know how you feel. In college, I had a pretty specific plan in mind to kill myself, probably by the time I turned 25. Even though my life was going "as planned" on paper, I was immensely unhappy with myself and my situation. Things can and will change for you, and I believe they will change for the better. But you must work diligently and patiently on your life before that can happen. I ask you to procrastinate on any ideas of suicide. After all, there's no rush, so give life a chance and see what happens. >>4096 There was a lot of back and forth ITT regarding your situation, and maybe you got things figured out in between posts. Personally, I know absolutely nothing about "making it" as an artist in the current year. But I'm familiar with a handful of artists who seem to have a handle on it. Are there any artists that you know of, either on the internet or IRL, that do what you want to do? If so, then I would strongly encourage you to just email them and ask them how they got to where they are. Some of them might brush you off or not respond at all, but I think, more often than not, you will find that many of them are happy to give advice to people like you. It sounds like you have a broad range of interests, but are mostly interested in traditional, maybe you should check out Kendric Tonn. Here's a short video that introduces him: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yYfvOPgTa0E He's also got a website where you can find his work and contact information: kendrictonn.com Maybe the kind of work he does is similar to what you are interested in doing? If it is, I would encourage you to send him an email and ask him how he is able to be successful doing what he does. Ask him for the advice that he wishes he knew when he first started out. Or any other questions you have. In the meantime, you can still use school as an opportunity to meet people who might help you a LOT later down the line. My experience is different (CS grad), but I've been able to make a few connections that helped me in my job search, and can still be valuable contacts while I am working in the industry.

>>4085 I reached the conclusion that the last dip will occur around that time. >>4103 >So buy on these days Yes. >does that mean if I am holding I should sell? No. Swinging is dangerous without a good strategy at hand. >Also, what is this based on? Based on my algorithms and other people's analysis.

>>4106 >Watch video >He literally just asked a gallery to look at his work and they listened But how do you do this do you just ask someone about how to do this. Which galleries do I even speak to I don't even think there's a single museum that isn't the two biggest one's in NYC.

>>4109 >But how do you do this do you just ask someone about how to do this. YES YES YOU STUPID AUTISTIC FUCK. YOUR ADULT LIFE SHOULD YOU CHOOSE TO NOT OFF YOURSELF WILL REVOLVE AROUND *YOU* NOT KNOWING THINGS AND OTHER PEOPLE KNOWING THINGS AND YOU WILL NEED TO FUCKING ASK. SOMETIMES RULES WILL BY EXPLICIT, MOST OF THE TIME THEY WILL NOT. GET OVER YOU FAT FUCKING SOCIAL ANXIETY COMPLEX YOU AUTISTIC PIECE OF SHIT AND REALIZE YOU NEED TO TALK TO PEOPLE TO MAKE THINGS FUCKING HAPPEN. REALIZE YOU NEED TO DO THIS EVERY SINGLE FUCKING TIME YOU ARE CONFUSED, OR OFF YOURSELF, I DON'T CARE WHICH, BUT THIS THREAD CAN NOT EXPLAIN EVERY SINGLE FUCKING STEP TO YOU ABOUT HOW TO LIVE YOUR FUCKING LIFE. God you are so insufferably retarded. Relying on your parents to fill out paperwork *you* should be filling out retard. Not being able to call a person whose entire job it is to encourage you to give them money. Not even considering the finances of the situation you're putting yourself in. There will come a time when no one can fucking hold your hand through every tiny fucking thing you need to do and you, yes you, will need to either kill yourself or realize you are an autistic retard and you will have to ask people autistically retarded questions about how to do mundane fucking tasks and appear autistically retarded for the world to see and get the fuck over it. God you piss me off so much.

>>4109 To be clear, I wouldn't expect it to be as easy as suggested in the video. In fact, I suspect Tonn had visited a number of galleries before finding one that both had available space and was interested in displaying his work. (Say, there's an idea for a question you could email him) nudge nudge >How do you do this Not to be as explosive as the other anon, here's what I would imagine: You literally walk in to a gallery and say something like: <Hi I'm anon, an artist from [insert home city], I'm interested in potentially showing my work in your gallery. Could I meet with some of your curators to review a selection of my work and discuss possibilities? Alternatively, you could also email the gallery. Email is convenient because you could include a link to your portfolio or website. That way, whoever reads your email can quickly tell that you are a serious artist. I have no idea what the galleries in your area are like. The easiest way to find them is to just search Google maps and look for some contact information. FYI, you might encounter some people who are tremendous assholes and will tell you to fuck off for even having the audacity to cold-call them. You might meet some genuinely decent people who are enthusiastic about showing a new artist in their gallery. No matter who you meet or what they say, don't get discouraged. The moment you throw up your hands and say "I guess I won't try," you've already lost. In my experience hunting for software jobs, I have had to send out literally hundreds of resumes through listings on job websites, email people I've never spoken to about possible openings at their company, reach out to friends of the family, and so on. Out of all the job leads I pursued, however, only one needed to work out. Now to be fair to the other anon, you are probably going to have to "get over yourself" and just take the plunge. If social interactions aren't your forte, then you are probably going to have a hard time. The video I linked also talks about how the artist is able to make connections with clients, models, other artists, the curators. No matter what you do for a living, it is immeasurably helpful to "know a guy who knows a guy." Chances are that anyone who is interested in buying your art will have friends who are also interested in art. If you have good people skills and make a good impression on buyers, they will probably want to refer their friends directly to you. The same applies to pretty much every single person you interact with as an artist.

>>4110 Thanks. But you should know I'm doing what I can on my end I never said I wasn't. Just today I had to keep setting up my schedule but the bureaucratic system is hard to navigate, I had to fill out tons of forms and mail people, just to get no real gain, I might get a downgrade in my classes actually, but hey I'm doing something. I've also already started job searching but I have to know what my final schedule is first and that requires waiting, so yeah, not my fault. >Your adult life is built around not knowing things. That's not particularly helpful. >>4113 I suppose I'd have to look them up then, but in all honesty I expect nothing when I do approach them due to the fact that NYC has this stingy attitude towards people even among the lowest independent parts, even if it's like an artist union gallery in an abandoned building I expect the people in them to go >Sorry not street level enough. Or things of the sort. You know what's funny is that you get immediate gallery exhibiting opportunities set up by being in my school, but it's very hard to keep pushing through life in general under these conditions. The government should really give a handout program to people like the National Socialists did for anyone willing to start a family, but for people working on just getting on their feet. I miss Hitler.

>>4114 I'm going to tell you something that would have saved me five years of pain and misery. You sound young, socially awkward, and have a lot of issues probably from not having someone in your life to guide you or even ask you questions about what it is you want out of life. I've been there, done that. And I'm telling you right now - give up. For your own benefit, through everything you've just described from living in a third-world state where your governor was just exiled, to not having your own bank account, give up. You don't have to quit art forever but realize that this dream of being a classical painter will not happen for a long time. I'm an Rx Tech because it pays better, covers dental/health/life, can pay rent, etc. My commissions don't do that. I don't buy new cars, I get beat-up, used Chevy's from Craigslist. I don't take out loans or credit on things I don't need and I can't pay back. You need to start thinking smaller, much smaller. Everything I'm telling you right now I try to think: "How will this help me be more self-sufficient and not reliant on others." This is not something that happens overnight, this is a mindset that will develop over time. >I miss Hitler. There's a lot of irony here. Because artists like Hitler and Jack Kirby had to put a pause on their career (on in Hitler's case, completely end his art dream) during WWII. During a crisis where people are not paid a living wage, there's a mass labor shortage, meanwhile low-skill, high-crime rate immigrants are still flooding into this country, you have to ZOOM OUT and really think: "Is this the best option for me right now?" You may never be that imaginary artist you dreamed of in your lifetime. But let God open up a window as this door closes for you.

>>4114 >But you should know I'm doing what I can on my end I never said I wasn't. Congrats on trying, I'll be fair, most haven't gotten that far, but my issue with you isn't that you're trying. It's that you're an austistic retard with zero knowledge of how the world works and yet your opinion of yourself is so high. >oh, I could NEVER deign to do digital distribution, I am too good for such things >I get so angry seeing shitty art in museums, that I know I could do so much better Maybe actually learn how to be a functional human adult that can support it's own existence before harshly defining what it is that is or isn't beneath you. If your weren't an autistic retard living with your parents I wouldn't take issue with your bullshit, because at least I know you're not 100% dead weight, but as it stands, you are, for all everyone else cares, a dog turd on the side walk. Barely noticed and actively avoided. Maybe be someone Hitler would actually want to work with before missing someone who probably hates how you function with every fiber of his being. >I've also already started job searching but I have to know what my final schedule is first and that requires waiting, so yeah, not my fault. You are 100% correct it is not your fault, big fucking whoop. It is your responsibility to deal with that. It's not your fault that you were born into this world but it certainly is your fucking responsibility now that you're here. It is not 100% your fault your life is shit, it is 100% your responsibility to make your life less shit. >That's not particularly helpful. Really? You're the autistic retard who didn't know when to submit his paperwork. Didn't know how to apply to a gallery. Didn't know whether or not his college took his fucking money properly. It sounds like the first fucking skill you should learn is how to know things.

I did it GAMERSI got my vax exemption denied now I only have to take online classes and can get a real job instead. I'll also work on paintings and shit so I can get stuff to submit to an exhibition. >>4118 >There's a lot of irony here. Because artists like Hitler and Jack Kirby had to put a pause on their career (on in Hitler's case, completely end his art dream) during WWII. During a crisis where people are not paid a living wage, there's a mass labor shortage, meanwhile low-skill, high-crime rate immigrants are still flooding into this country, you have to ZOOM OUT and really think: "Is this the best option for me right now?" You may never be that imaginary artist you dreamed of in your lifetime. But let God open up a window as this door closes for you. I'm dealing with sleep deprivation right now so I don't think I read that right but if you're asking me to become Hitler 2: I'll try. This time I'll do it right and win. >>4064 The third. Ironically enough not for anyone sexual reason, just because it's become increasingly unlikely that I will ever find a single woman to date. I mean I Just missed out on another year of going outside with motivation to do something, women in this shithole state are all ugly, and the one's in my school are all foreign and now reduced to being computer screens presumably permanently. I have essentially lost out on the final years to really find a woman I like enough to marry while she's still unsullied and you know, not a whore, everyone memes that women after age 12 are all non virgin sluts, but no really the percentage drops off from age 19 from being like 50% being virgins to a hard 0.1%. My chances of getting a woman good enough to date are gone chief. I have as such developed the idea in recent years that I would perhaps be able to view the potential a girl, and I mean girl, would have to not only fulfil that purity virgin complex, but also sculpt and influence her into being the woman I always wanted by getting her on good dietary and exercise habits, as well as good mental education for the type of woman I'd always have wanted. One on my level. The power couple that I've dreamed of being, and if I'm unfortunately older by a decade or three so be it. Literal grooming not just to make her fuck me, marry me, but literally grooming her into the human being I want her to be and not who she would have organically been, all for my personal gain at the expense of her autonomy and hymen. I suppose you can say I wouldn't need to break the law to do this, but better to be safe than sorry. >Wow that's really fucked up, quite possibly the most fucked up thing I have read on this website thus far, I mean you might be an actual sociopath or psychopath or some shit dude, like we've all been calling you an insipid retarded autist this whole thread but there might actually be something deeply wrong with you. Thanks I know. Not really my problem. Don't worry though I'd never act on it obviously it would require too much labor and calculation on my end to engineer a human being from such a young age into my ideal woman then marrying her even if I did want to act on it. For all it's worth it's just a long story short way of saying I'll never really be able to have the idealist relationship I've always wanted. I will die alone and loveless. But I'll be damned if I don't die loveless, while also looking good and being accomplished. >>4119 You are 100% correct it is not your fault, big fucking whoop. It is your responsibility to deal with that. It's not your fault that you were born into this world but it certainly is your fucking responsibility now that you're here. It is not 100% your fault your life is shit, it is 100% your responsibility to make your life less shit. I never said it wasn't I simply am stating I'm using the feels thread for what it's made. To vent because life keeps piling unwanted responsibilities, blockades, and straight up closing roads I wanted to go down constantly on me. You're not wrong, my inaction hasn't helped improve things, but you're acting like I can do something here aside from just accept that I won't be able to do certain things I want. I hate it too I know, but there's only so much I can do apart from raping women mentally and physically or making equally as bad medical and financial decisions.

>>4122 >inflated sense of self worth >naivety about how to function around other adults >social anxiety <pedophile Checks out captain.

>>4123 >Checks out captain. Well yeah, after all...

>>4122 >can't call a university to ask if they charged you correctly <desires to mold a child into his ideal human being Nigger you can't even get yourself functioning how the fuck would you ever make anything good let alone fucking ideal?

>>4125 I have a broken phone that cannot record audio properly anyway, but more importantly there were just more factors that just led me to use email instead. It wouldn't have changed anything anyway but I'll call too from now on just to make you happy, random Anonymous person on 8chan.moe. I'm still not sure why you're so mad about that in specific. Did your life get saved with a payphone or something in the 90's, so you felt grateful to phones forever, and have become resentful of not only me but everyone born after 1993 for using online communications instead of telephone communications for general networking like generations of old? Serious question.

>>4122 >all that political justification for diddling children I'm glad you finally got your political thesis on why only the purest of 12-year-olds will do, at least it properly explains the rest of your posts and the way you approach the world. >>Wow that's really fucked up, quite possibly the most fucked up thing I have read on this website thus far, I mean you might be an actual sociopath or psychopath or some shit dude, like we've all been calling you an insipid retarded autist this whole thread but there might actually be something deeply wrong with you. Don't fucking kid yourself, this isn't close to the most fucked up thing I've read on an imageboard. Compared to self-actualized pedophiles who make the world actively worse you're nothing but, again, dead weight. At least they actually do things, you're just refuse. >You're not wrong, my inaction hasn't helped improve things, but you're acting like I can do something here aside from just accept that I won't be able to do certain things I want. Well you aren't doing that, if you did you wouldn't be going to Art School. You'd accept the current state of affairs as >>4118 and realize you aren't going to be living the idyllic life of an artist. >I hate it too I know, but there's only so much I can do apart from raping women mentally and physically or making equally as bad medical and financial decisions. You could choose neither and become a functioning member of society since you obviously missed the boat when it came to being a genius going through Art School. Geniuses don't come out of their parents house at 23 ready to face the world. You obviously don't sound well off, so I'm imaging the "abusing my wealth to network" angle is also cut off. So I'm not seeing any good reason to make the retarded moves you're making other than pride. >>4126 >I have a broken phone that cannot record audio properly anyway Well that's certainly a different story from here >>4066 >Unlikely since I'm already anxious enough I guess I'll just have to ask by email I was making fun of you for thinking how much above Hollywood and the money laundering high art scene you were when get more anxious from needing to make a phone call. If your phone's broke just say so next time retard. "I'm anxious" is something no one but your spouse (that you don't have), friends (that you also don't have) or family (which you don't get along with) give a single utter shit about. It's not a good reason to avoid doing something.

>>4127 Go back to Reddit immediately.

>>4128 And you should fuck off to discord, gotta start early to groom that perfect Aryan waifu.

>>4122 Stop with this nonsense. The internet has completely disconnected you from reality. Try getting off the internet for a week or two to detox your brain. You made a mistake by going to art school. You cannot get a job with an art degree and there is no glory in being a starving artist. I strongly suggest you take a year off to fix all of your personal problems such as the relationship with your parents and your social anxiety. Assuming your parents are not in huge debts they are still crucial for your financial independence by providing housing thus saving on rent and other expenses.

>>4127 >Compared to self-actualized pedophiles who make the world actively worse you're nothing but, again, dead weight. At least they actually do things, you're just refuse. >you're just refuse. You've* Also did you just try to incite me into breaking multiple laws in over 100 different nations over your can do philosophy? Hmmmm... >>4137 >You cannot get a job with an art degree and there is no glory in being a starving artist. Rembrandt. Van Gogh. Fragonard. Caravaggio. Vermeer. Yeah... Yeah there kind of is, I'm kind of exceptionally cool for being poor and lonely now, I'll likely give away my fortune and set my works to the public domain when I die without giving a cent to my kids or family, and yeah I'm dying penniless and miserable too. And yeah... you can't stop me. I'm going to be self destructive and a cancerous violent human being who's equally as much of an asshole as he is a genius like all artists of old were. You forget that these people got their noses broken for insulting other artists, killed and assaulted other human beings, and often died alone, sick, depressed, penniless, and bitter. That's cool. That's pretty cool. I'm kinda cool. Yeah... I'm pretty cool. So true. Still not breaking any laws short of becoming Hitler's top guy and leading the revolution to destroy Israel if I need to though FBI, nice try.

>>4141 Also *refused Also check em'.

>>4141 >Also did you just try to incite me into breaking multiple laws in over 100 different nations over your can do philosophy? No, I said at least those guys are respectable purely on the level of going for it. I at least want to properly strangle an actual kiddie diddler to death, with you I just want you to finally off yourself where I can't see you because you physically make me ill as opposed to angry. >You've* When I say, you are just refuse, I mean you are just refuse. I am using this definition. >noun. ref·​use | \ ˈre-ˌfyüs , -ˌfyüz \ Definition of refuse (Entry 2 of 3) 1 : the worthless or useless part of something : leavings. 2 : trash, garbage. I would kind of expect a pedophile who can't understand high school math, thinks Art school is a good investment (in the US) to not be able to read well though. >You forget that these people got their noses broken for insulting other artists, killed and assaulted other human beings, and often died alone, sick, depressed, penniless, and bitter. >You forget that these people got their noses broken for insulting other artists, killed and assaulted other human beings, and often died alone, sick, depressed, penniless, and bitter. You get social anxiety asking questions, and you're comparing yourself to these guys? >Still not breaking any laws short of becoming Hitler's top guy and leading the revolution to destroy Israel if I need to though FBI, nice try. Give me one good fucking reason Hitler would want you to be his top guy you retard? Why would Hitler want anything to do with you?

>>4144 >Give me one good fucking reason Hitler would want you to be his top guy you retard? Why would Hitler want anything to do with you? I got into art school he didn't.:^) But no seriously though, I never share art online but I've made tons of OC across the web (that I never monetized for obvious reasons) which would help spread the cause for one. Probably more reasons too. Can you say Hitler would want you to fight for him? >No, I said at least those guys are respectable purely on the level of going for it. I at least want to properly strangle an actual kiddie diddler to death, with you I just want you to finally off yourself where I can't see you because you physically make me ill as opposed to angry. That means a lot to me, thanks. But I don't think even on an ironic level you can call going though with breaking the law and mindbreaking a kid respectable. >When I say, you are just refuse, I mean you are just refuse. I am using this definition. >noun. ref·​use | \ ˈre-ˌfyüs , -ˌfyüz \ Definition of refuse (Entry 2 of 3) 1 : the worthless or useless part of something : leavings. 2 : trash, garbage. But "You are just refuse" seems like a incorrect way of saying it even if you're going for moespeak or doing it intentionally. It should be "you are refusing." Listen, there's only one way to settle this, we need to call an expert linguist who has studied everything from Latin, to old English, to modern Ebonics, because I am certain under no circumstances does that make grammatical sense. >You get social anxiety asking questions, and you're comparing yourself to these guys? If it makes you feel better I did ask the question, anyone would feel anxiety under these circumstances, and I'm not anti social, just socially violent.

>>4141 >Van Gogh. To starve with paintings that will be worth millions in a few centuries is equivalent to Greg Schoen selling his 1700 BTC at $0.30 except you do not even get to 5x. It is the ultimate cuckoldry. >I die without giving a cent to my kids or family You will not have kids or family if you continue like this. >often died alone, sick, depressed, penniless, and bitter. That's cool. Suffering for no reason other than pride is cringe. >I'm pretty cool. Being a poor art student is cringe. >becoming Hitler's top guy and leading the revolution to destroy Israel if I need Hitler is dead.

>>4146 >Can you say Hitler would want you to fight for him? No, because unlike you I can tell I'm not a decent enough human being for that yet. >But I don't think even on an ironic level you can call going though with breaking the law and mindbreaking a kid respectable. Compared to you they are, what does that say about you? >But "You are just refuse" seems like a incorrect way of saying it even if you're going for moespeak or doing it intentionally. It should be "you are refusing." "Refuse" as an noun is not something refuses, it is the trash that is tossed out of something. The ocean is a great example with gross plastics, dead kelp and fish parts. Here, I have attached a picture example of ocean refuse so you can better understand how I view you. If you wanted me to be wordy, I guess I could call you "The refuse of human society". Would that make you feel better? >If it makes you feel better I did ask the question, anyone would feel anxiety under these circumstances, and I'm not anti social, just socially violent. Normalfags may feel anxious about not knowing the current situation, but they do not get anxious about asking. Because the average socialfag experiences stress-relief when talking to others.

>>4146 >I'm not anti social, just socially violent. Nigger, you can't even call the university to ask basic questions, let alone submit your work to a gallery. You aren't "socially violent," you're socially inept. Get off your high horse and put your feet in the mud. Get through school and actually put some effort in so you can get something worthwhile out of the experience. Stop idolizing Hitler, he fucked up and lost a perfectly winnable war. He's a loser. Deal with your Madonna/Whore complex. Chances are you aren't actually attracted to twelve year old girls (have you ever even spoken to one?), you just have a totally warped image of what you think women are supposed to be. Women are just people, some of them are decent, some are not, like everyone else.

>>4032 >>4052 >>4055 >>4066 >>4073 >>4075 >>4077 >>4089 anon have you ever considered doing furry porn

>>4141 Why don't you actually go outside and do something interesting instead of larping on a Taiwanese basket-weaving forum you absolute sperg.

>>4152 I cannot make erotic art. If I could I would make hentai already, tons of it, but I cannot. I just can't. I have done studies of horsecocks before but I just can't fucking make it erotic. >>4149 >Hitler is dead. Post discarded. >>4151 >Deal with your Madonna/Whore complex. Chances are you aren't actually attracted to twelve year old girls (have you ever even spoken to one?), you just have a totally warped image of what you think women are supposed to be. Women are just people, some of them are decent, some are not, like everyone else. But I hate people. Also yeah I have, 12 year old girls are annoying, women in general at any age are, but you're lying to yourself if you think life isn't a numbers game, and the younger the woman, the higher the percentage for potential isn't there in such a hypothetical situation. >>4150 >"Refuse" as an noun is not something refuses, it is the trash that is tossed out of something. The ocean is a great example with gross plastics, dead kelp and fish parts. Here, I have attached a picture example of ocean refuse so you can better understand how I view you. If you wanted me to be wordy, I guess I could call you "The refuse of human society". Would that make you feel better? Oh right. I have never heard of anyone outside of the British use that term in that fashion, which is unfortunate that HItler didn't take them out. The anglo saxons are truly a subhuman race. Rational human beings you see, only view the term refuse as a verb, it literally comes up as the first definition on the internet and most dictionaries. The British of course, are not rational human beings. >>4153 I have the spare time to do so for one. Why don't you?

>>4154 Tell me about your horsecock hentai ideas, anon.

>>4154 >The anglo saxons are truly a subhuman race. Rational human beings you see, only view the term refuse as a verb, it literally comes up as the first definition on the internet and most dictionaries. 100% agreed, you have a point trogolodyte? You're a 56% face and you're going to bitch about anglos?

>>4155 I have none, I just said I only did studies and they came off as flat, unerotic, I cannot draw anything sexual. >>4156 >You're a 56% face and you're going to bitch about anglos? Well I'm not of the generic American descent. I have mostly Greek ancestry actually, but the USA has been bitching about the British since at least the Civil War when they backed the Confederacy to destabilize the country. How can you not expect resentment of the British?

>>4154 >I just can't fucking make it erotic. Draw wholesome, non-erotic horsecocks then.

>>4157 Still got your studies on hand? I'm sure someone here can give you some tips on how to zest it up a bit.

>>4158 But I can't draw cartoons or stylized art either. >>4159 Fuck I don't think so they were done 3 years ago or so, I would have to look, or worse, ask my mother, I might have thrown it out and despite being-- I'm not going to say an idiot, but was never fit to be a parent, she's still my mom and loves my art so she collects all the art I throw out for not being good enough. Maybe she's holding out on the idea that I succeed one day then she can sell them all and make enough money to retire off me. >Wait so your mom might have drawings of horse cocks you made? YES Maybe, I don't know, they're likely gone forever because I might have thrown them into some box somewhere.

>>4160 Post your work already.

>>4161 >implying anyone who bitches this much has work to post

When your homeless and trying to sell your work but everyone wants a portrait. And I'm not a portrait artist Fml Aha anon reporting in

>>4169 >>4161 If either of you are serious and not just shilling a shit /ic/ cuckchannel meme, I will not post any of my physical work without payment because I'm not scanning it for posting because it takes too much work and I cannot be half assed to wash my hands, pull out my storage folder, and post even my basic sketches much less my serious work, but if you want something here's a meme drawing that I made digitally in 16 minutes days ago. >>4098

>>4173 you might not be a master atelier, but you are a master of excuses.

>>4171 Welcome back frond; good to see you again. Sorry to hear you're going through some sh*t rn tho

>>4173 >won't show his work for free <will pay 10,000$ to show professors his work Checks out

No bulli

The fuck did I just read in the last forty posts? LMAO I love you guys. You're all so wholesome in your own rights.

>>4197 >forty Admittedly I haven't slept and wouldn't trust myself to count my fingers, but I think double that number is closer to the truth.

I finally made back all the money I lost during the short squeeze. I am back in business. Rate.

>>4201 >tfw went from 6k to 1k back to 6k between first and second short squeeze iftf

I just finished registering classes all to be online and specifically around my schedule. Now not that anyone gives a shit and you shouldn't, but I just realized something: I am fucking terrible at scheduling, oh my God I am fucking terrible at scheduling. I just looked through a list of classes I couldn't attend because they were full even if I had been able to go in person and there were no vaccine shit. I got irrationally angry because so many of them were just simply shit like going to museums and stuff I already do in my spare time as hobbies. It would have been the comfiest, easiest shit, easy A. Of course they were all full because everyone power grabs the easiest classes like I would have if I weren't such a dense fucker. I would say it's not fully my fault, but no it really is. I gotta make a note to take it upon myself to register early next year because I don't wanna miss out on the free win easy classes next year. Even with the classes I had set up previously they were almost all annoying to just hear their descriptions. It would have been a shit year anyway and in retrospect this is an improvement. I have to read Crime and Punishment and fucking Jekyll and Hyde now instead of Machiavelli and Plato so I wouldn't say it's too much of one, but it is just barely. I should ideally get an online only job too. If not I'll have to get one at night because I'm just naturally a night owl and sleep 9 hours during the day. If not, honestly? Night time jobs are probably easier, worst case scenario I get shived walking back home. Oh yeah you'll all be glad to note I'm working on a series of paintings, which is really just one but I won't elaborate further, to ever sell in a gallery, as well as getting a job just in general like mentioned above. Ideally I'll have 3 by the end of the year, just to maximize profit give me your best advice on tax evasion now.

I recovered from my leverage trading losses and am even in profit. Now that I have gotten a pretty good hang of how the market works I am finally ready to invest the bulk of my capital. I will stop talking about trading unless I get rekt again because there is nothing more boring and annoying than someone making money through crypto. Meanwhile whales losing their money is always fun to watch. >>4206 >tax evasion >US citizen LOL

>go to work a substitute teaching job >they moved two vending machines into a bathroom

>Search for jobs online >Work from home >It's all either a bunch of gibberish or "tech support" >look up night shift jobs >it's all just medical work >Most of them ask for a GED or highschool diploma equivalent >Even the supermarket jobs I expect to get are jibberish asking for what is basically 12 jobs at any time you're called to do it because fuck you I'm not sure where to even apply for a job at a local store for night shifts if any night shifts even exist anymore thanks to COVID schedules. I'm planning on just asking one of the employee's straight up where to apply for work after walking in. I don't expect to get far because I'll likely just get rejected from lack of qualifications or find there isn't a schedule I can work with. But wait there's more >University actually has a pretty detailed job program >Oh sick, there has to be something here I can do right. >GRAPHIC DESIGN >GRAPHIC DESIGN >GRAPHIC DESIGN >GRAPHIC DESIGN >ILLUSTRATION >GRAPHIC DESIGN >GRAPHIC DESIGN >FUCK YOU The only job that stood out to me was >Art Studio Assistant But I don't even know what the fuck you do there, from the one description I got you're supposed to offer critical help with the artists process and help with networking calls and management. The problem is I can't manage anything so I can't do the secretary part of the job, and I can't really offer critique because I just hate criticizing other people's works. Even if I did know what the fuck do to I'm still too far away to do it without spending money on travel. Whatever, worst case scenario I end up having to deal drugs or try to and get caught in a fed honeypot, but at least then I'll go to jail and actually network with criminals, get better living conditions than my current one's, and by the time I'm out I'll be able to at least sell my paintings as a tax evasion scheme for mob bosses, and cocaine trafficking by infusing the cocaine into the paint so my paintings will actually be inherently worth something. Things can only go up from here. >>4213 At least you have a job. At least your job provides a bathroom and food. Now you can shit while eating a chocolate bar.

>>4214 You sound like a faggot.

>>4215 ok

>>4214 You don't sound like a faggot to me, but you sound like someone who underestimates what he's capable of. You can easily find jobs and have a good life if you're likable. You don't even have to attractive for that. Just be positive and thoughtful. Working on your mental state and inherent happiness is the greatest asset you can develop.

>>4214 What is graphic design anyway? It seems like it's just about making shitty alegria style vector art.

>>4219 Not that anon, but I've given my hand at trying to learn graphic design for give-or-take four months before deciding it wasn't really for me. It can be a variety of things - mascots, icons, user-interface and web design, logos, etc. A lot of graphic designers will learn more than one of these things to increase their skills and chance of getting work. It's not the worst idea in the world for a creative person, but I lost motivation just looking at what passes for graphic design in modern advertising and brand design. Ask yourself this, how many companies even want a recognizable mascot anymore? A lot of fun, quirky character art is obsolete because it would draw negative attention. If your brand is focused on being inclusive and diverse, you can't have a mascot that represents your company values. Alegria is a part of this problem because it attempts to be the most inclusive and diverse style for brand design by making its "people" unnatural skin colors and with limbs and shapes purposefully out of proportion. CD jacket designs that had paintings with intention and movie poster designs where artists where hired to paint the models are all gone in favor of absolutely abhorrent photography or bad photoshop jobs. Advertising art and graphic design isn't entirely dead but it's absolutely soulless.

>>4222 >Advertising art and graphic design isn't entirely dead but it's absolutely soulless. Yeah and that's why studio assistant was the only one that stood out. I still have no clue what to do regarding jobs, it's hard to get one as of now, but by the end of the week I'll just ask at every grocery store in town I know of if they have night shift openings.

>>3448 What a piece of shit paper. Time and time again I am utterly appalled at how fucking shit academia tends to be, especially in fields such as sociology.

>>4219 >What is graphic design anyway? It seems like it's just about making shitty alegria style vector art. <What is science anyway? It seems like it's just about making shitty algebra style mathematics equations.

>>4141 In case you haven't noticed, this website is rife with halfchan/reddit/twitter normalfags. I suggest you also not use their slang even ironically, even words that may have been fine but became popularized by them (such as glownigger after Metokur made that video on Terry; really interesting that that only became a meme after the video, isn't it? almost like these sites are full of idiots who don't belong who need surrogate fathers to dictate for them). You seem like the kind of person who cares about improving yourself, so I'm sure you'll listen. Also, stop masturbating. Niggers tongue my anus.

>>4236 >even words that may have been fine but became popularized by them How would anyone even know what lingo halfchan/reddit/twitter are using without visiting those places? Have you been browsing them?

>>4236 It's hard to keep up with the times and filter out what was or wasn't just cuckchan lingo vs original slang. >>4239 Because you cannot go five seconds without seeing it on any other website like YouTube.

>>4240 I don't watch Youtube either.

I am thinking about taking the J&J vaccine because it seems like the safest of them all. I have until next year to do it though and I am pretty sure covid would have ended by then. Rate.

>>4250 If you're concerned about mRNA vaccine tech and have a year to wait, you can just get Novavax instead when it comes out. It's a traditional vaccine.

>>4251 >Novavax Looks like the safest vaccine by a long shot. I will be getting that then. Thanks.

>>4250 I'm basically not going to take it (the vaccine) Ugh...I know. I know! I'm SORRY! ...but I'm just not going to take it is all. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Fuck am I tired. It takes serious labor to do an under drawing for a painting that's 6x6 feet on the ground, fuck I wish I knew where to buy giant fuck off canvases. I had to seriously stop after a while and just sit down and drink a glass of water Jesus Christ that was astoundingly shit. Next time I'm just going around town and asking them if they'll let me paint on their walls for free or just go full graffiti and do it unauthorized because I am not doing that standing while the paper lays on the floor, my body holy fuck, on the hottest week of September too FUCK YOU END THE HEAT ALREADY IT'S MID SEPTEMBER WHAT ARE YOU DOING GOD Still haven't found a job either, I'm just going to have to go out scouting physically because I have absolutely no idea where to go. I would ask for which places don't mind hiring unvaccinated people but my town has a fuck ton of local businesses thanks to liberal middle class gentrification allowing for non corporate but even more expensive businesses to take over and fight off McDonalds and Walmart no literally, they removed them from town years ago so asking wouldn't yield answers unless you live in my area and it sounds like no one here does. >>4254 Me too. Given that it apparently doesn't stop the spread of corona at all I really wish those of us who already had corona and didn't die can go back out with the same privilege's I mean shit, if the vaccinated can't even prevent themselves from getting it then at the end of the day we're superior if nothing else. Or well I'd like to think. In all likely hood I would have ended up getting fucked over anyway and being able to go outside wouldn't have made any difference in how I could or could not improve my life. Upon assessment of all prior information I would have still been forced into living the way I am but just slightly able to socialize more at the literal cost of budget sacrifice that I wouldn't be able to afford. I mean the majority of my classmates are all foreigners, and the one's who aren't are all butter faces, there was like 3 total white women I've met thus far, and two are, like I said butter faces, one isn't even fully white, and has hair dye. She just screams "Frida Kahlo wannabe." Which I can't blame her for but anyway, point being I hold zero reason to socialize at this point. I just got to focus on the grind.

>>4254 >I'm basically not going to take it (the vaccine) >Ugh...I know. I know! >I'm SORRY! >...but I'm just not going to take it is all. >HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

>>4250 I wouldn't recommend you to let yourself be injected with nanobots that will be remotely controlled through 5G towers. (Although it would probably be cool for a moment to have a magnetic spot on your body.) I recommend believing in Jesus Christ as your savior.

>>4260 >muh schizo fantasy muh sky daddy That's crazy bro but how am I supposed to avoid the vaccine when they forbid unvaccinated people to enter the building?

>>4261 Don't go in the building retard.

>>4266 >>4266 Nice dubs but I have to. Work from home ended weeks ago. I just boughted btw.

>>4272 Welp, if your job is that important to you then I can't stop you. Honestly I'm lucky to have entered education and start looking for work during the pandemic, it sets up very low expectations and even better, I can just turn down job offers that force me to get vaccinated before I ever commit to them as well as school.

>>4279 >Welp, if your job is that important to you then I can't stop you. It's my best bet for retiring in my 20s so I am willing to tolerate the inconveniences. I could probably switch but all the big places are super globohomo so it makes almost no difference. >I'm lucky to have entered education and start looking for work You're gonna make it.

>>4280 >oy vey I'm chasing a ludicrous jewish fantasy because I was told it's possible >oh no now the ZOG has made it impossible for me to do the thing they lied to me about being possible in the first place >muh stabby jab is worth this delusion continuing! Absolutely fucking pathetic.

>>4281 The ZOG is fine with retirees as long as they still consume. Only absolute retards are forced to work due to lack of forethought.

>>4281 >ludicrous jewish fantasy Retiring early is perfectly doable though. I am doing very well compared to my peers and have a pretty good idea of what I need to do to achieve my goal. >muh stabby jab I have already thought it through and taking the vaccine is but a bump in the road to financial freedom. I don't want to end up like the med school graduates who lost their job as a practitioner because they were too unyielding to take the vaccine. >Absolutely fucking pathetic. To retire early and not having to worry about money in your old age is absolutely fucking based.

>>4283 Enjoy the potential health risks that come with the vaccine. By the way should I wait for my parents to see if they can help out with my job search or should I just apply for a work from home one that likely doesn't pay enough to live off of but is worth risking.

>Found a job worth freelance applying for >It's one of those "Online work for a corporation and maybe work hard enough to make barely 1k a week" jobs >Whatever sure I need something >It requires paypal >try registering paypal >It needs a card >Have never had a card >Never even had allowance because I was always a non materialistic person but now I need a room to live in which costs more than anything I have ever wanted before I know this isn't the best place to ask but what the fuck do I do. Do I join a credit union since I hear they're better? Just apply for a card from Visa ASAP online because I need to see what this job entails? I don't know what to do here /loomis/ I have never done anything like this in my life before but I need to. I don't know where to start. I know, it's become exceptionally pathetic treating this thread this way since this probably can't even be considered venting any more but I'm completely lost. I'm scared and desperate, I haven't been able to exercise regularly in 3 weeks, and my heart is on the verge of suicide by rupture or heart attack at the rate I've been going. I need to be self dependent by the end of the year or I'm just backflipping off the nearest skyscraper or my own building. Please help. How the fuck do I become a functioning adult. I would have needed to ask anyway in the end because any job requires some sort of account to send money to but I have none.

>>4288 I assume depends on the country you're in. I don't live in America (thank you, lord) but here you can open a bank count at any bank. If you're younger than an X age you don't even have to pay fees, because they pray on you staying with them once you have your bank account. Your job ain't going to pay cash, so you probably just need "a card" as in, a place where they can send you your salary. Just go to a bank (or banks, if you want to choose around. And you should, given some banks may have better or worse deals) and explain to them your situation and what you need from them. It may cost a small fee (or it may be a monthly thing), but that depends on the bank and whatnot. Opening a deposit with a credit card shouldn't be a big work, or at least, it isn't here. Banks literally make money out of having clients deposit money in their vaults afterall. People there work for you and, while, they're trying to sell you a service they're literally paid by mr.money to hear any sort of autistic question you may have. From there doing a paypal account is quite easy. Just a website thing. Don't get scared Anon: take a big breath and pet your cat.

>>4288 Go into a banking lobby and ask for help setting up a checking account. They actively want to help you store money. Take your SS card and birth certificate with you. They will give you a card by the end of the day, and hold your hand through the process. Again, the steps are >get SS card and birth certificate >physically go to a bank >ask for help setting up a checking account >answer all the questions the person asks you

>>4290 I HAVE NO PET CAT >>4291 Shit do I need my birth certificate with me? Can't I apply for a card online now without a cosigner?

>>4292 Just fucking go talk to a bank dude. They'll tell you what to do and what to bring and probably how to get what you need. Don't be retarded and apply for some random card online (if you even can) that may not be able to accept payments because it's only a debit card. Hell, here in europe you can open a pseudo-bank found even at the post office, you don't even fucking need a bank.

>>4293 The problem is I need a copayment before age 21 because of the card act here in the USA. >Consumers under the age of 21 must prove that they have an independent income or get a co-signer before applying for a credit card. Another gay retard law made to protect people from capitalism only to make capitalism worse to live under seriously full on socialism or anarcho capitalism is the only way a good society functions meaning I either need a cosigner or a job first, but this job needs a credit card first, and my parents refuse to cosign before I get a job or worse, in general because they're assholes. See the problem here? Whatever I just improvised and found some wagie job at a grocery store during the night shift, I don't think a resume is required, and I have none, should I just freeball it and fill out the fields they let me fill out then just apply? I mean what are they gonna do, reject me?

>>4294 Actually ignore this post I've chosen to just go and ask physically because I don't want to apply for a job that just ends up having shit requirements like say a mandate for the vaccine. They are owned by Amazon after all. I'm still not sure of what to do with my life here since I'm already pretty lost but whatever in the end, at the end of the day if every single place rejects me for whatever reason I can always just apply to a gallery or auction house despite my low self esteem from sheer desperation or just go into the woods, I know for a fact once you start going between Albany and the lower New York area there are secluded area's with nothing but tree's, deer, and sasquatches. Legally speaking no one is allowed to go in the woods onto land you haven't paid for to cut down tree's and build your own house, but at the same time those fags won't be able to locate a cabin covered in miles of tree's, there are area's with no phone coverage so there's no way they'd be able to find me if I go off grid. Worst case scenario I meet a bigfoot, or dogman, or interdimensional forest demon who rips me apart and imprisons my soul in the 5th dimension for eternity with never ending pain and I go missing forever and completely forgotten having disappeared at the atomic level. The sad part is that things have gotten so bad that both that and death no longer sound like unwanted things.

>>4294 I'm sorry a credit card? No credit card, you want a Debit card. Credit card is for making purchases you intend to pay back at the end of the month.

>>4296 Can I hypothetically take out a rent on an apartment on credit and then pay at the end of the month? Also yeah the Card act still applies to debit cards I believe.

>>4297 >Can I hypothetically take out a rent on an apartment on credit and then pay at the end of the month? Theorhetically yes, but you will be charged additional fees for using a card to pay for rent as opposed to directly out of the account.

>>4297 Card Act only effects Credit Cards, it has zero things to do with debit cards.

>>4294 Other anons have beat me to it but... You sure it applies both to credit and debit card? I can understand why they'd want people under 21 and without a credit not to be able to purchase a debit card. But I don't see why you wouldn't be able to open a bank found. Also I don't think a debit card would help, as far as I know you can't receive money on most of them

I met up with some old friends. We went to a restaurant and I was the only one who could not enter because I was unvaccinated. They did not want to leave me behind so we ordered takeout instead and ate somewhere else. I felt like a burden but they said that it was alright and that the vaccine card requirement was messed up. Turns out they were worried about me because I lost contact with them for so long. I told them what I have been doing during these years and they said I have 5x their combined net worth. They congratulated me on my success and we left a few hours later. I have always thought of the world as a hostile place where no one would care even if I die but turns out there really are people who care about my wellbeing aside from my parents. It feels very heartwarming. I never really considered anyone my friend so I did not gave a second thought when I deleted all my social media and went tinfoil hat mode a long time ago. I feel guilty for ghosting them but at the same time I value my privacy above everything else. Either way I would like to find a way to stay in contact with them for at least 10 more years. Rate.

>>4300 The debit card is required to open the paypal which is required to receive the payment from the possible employer.

I'm getting set up in the woods and it's going forward. I won't have to deal with gobberment annoyances for another year, so I can focus on getting set up over here. I hope that Drawpile doesn't eat too much bandwidth, because I will need to buy some kind of prepaid internet card if I want to access the Matrix out here. I love it here. I love the cold air, working outside while it rains and being soaked and cold. Choppong wood in the cold, because it's the only real source of heat out here, except for my own body. I love harvesting the fruits andbvegetables, which taste so much better than anything you could buy in the city, that it's impossibly hard to discribe with words. The air is fresh, the soil is rich. Everything is so visceral and real. This is what I call real reference for my art. Unspeakable and yet undeniably valuable for my art.

>>4303 that's great but consider you don't need the internet that bad, hit up a mc donalds once a week or some other place with free wifi. Personally if I had it my way and could live like that, I'd just leave this shit behind altogether. it's not that important, at the end of the day.

Well I finally did it and completed my application screening. I may or may not have fucked it up at the end by double clicking the "Continue" button only to get 404'd. I hope hope that it was an intentional disconnect on the company website part because the link served it's purpose. Seriously though I'm praying all goes well. I doubt I'll be able to exercise or anything until I get adjusted to both work and school schedules which is going to be hell until I get an apartment as soon as possible, which is why I'm more than open to just jumping head first into debt to get one. Also unrelated but >Went out to buy copic markers today >Got pic related as final product Absolutely unacceptable. The color just doesn't do good for skin tones at all, I'm thinking of sending back in specific the YR00 I got because it's too orange, and is already dry and scuffed as all hell. Pic related was a 5 minute sketch but already I can tell I need to send back that one at least. Because of that cunt who made the "Le epic shoplifting comic" too I couldn't draw with them to sample which one's to get immediately, they're locked behind panel glass with locks and you can only pick them out and buy them instead of using them freely. Honestly though thank God I didn't, it would have been embarassing to put up even small art next to other people's on the small 5x5 paper sketch pad they have out for testing with these colors. I mean all the other art on it was tumblr tier shit made by 12 year olds riffing off Jamie Hewlett but shit if I wouldn't look just as bad thanks to this. If I ever see that bitch I am beating her to death, I am almost certain she caused this with her garbage comic. Remember kids, shoplifting does nothing to destroy capitalism you just make life worse for everyone else. Fucking goobers. At last I understand why Hitler banned degenerate art, it's not just "I do not like modern art, it scares me" these queers and their practices directly affect everyone butterfly effect style with their mindsets and need to actually be suppressed for everyone else not to suffer. Can someone please tell me which copic marker model numbers are actually the best for skin tone? >>4298 How much are the additional fee's? >>4299 Doesn't matter if I can get an apartment using a credit card to go in debt by $1-1.5k a month before even getting my first check I'd do it. A debit card would help less.

>>4305 >Doesn't matter if I can get an apartment using a credit card to go in debt by $1-1.5k a month before even getting my first check I'd do it. A debit card would help less. This would sincerely be a better move than going into debt for a art school, and i say that with a straight face. Most apartments however won't take you in without proof of income however, so that means it's impossible to float rent on a credit card until you get a job, you need the job first. Nor does this cover the fact with zero credit background you'd probably qualify for a 300$ creditcard at best.

>>4305 As a digicuck I might've just gotten this mixed up, but I thought the entire point of copics was that you can layer them very well. Have you tried basically mixing through opacity? Harassing the company because "x color doesn't work for the task I mistakenly tried to put it to using the worst conceivable approach for the medium" seems really absurd. But maybe I misunderstood the problem.

>>4307 Shhhhh, he's really smart and going to be a great painter some day, you shouldn't point out he was using his tools wrong.

>>4307 No, the colors are quite literally too far removed from human skin tone even with mixing or blending of any sort. In addition if you look at the image I posted closely, the ink seems to be way too dried on the YR00 anyway, it leaves too many white spots, it's noticeable if you study it under a microscope or in this case, a scanner. It quite literally justifies a return even if blending could have salvaged the colors themselves. >>4308 But the tools I was using were literally incorrect to begin with, and I wouldn't have this problem if I could have just used them myself before buying them. Instead of being a smartass who tries to devalue everything anyone else says maybe work on understanding posts first before getting involved in a conversation. >>4309 >Your grasp of how skintone works appears to be fundamentally flawed. I agree. So what in specific is wrong with it? Apart from the color choice being inherently incorrect to use for human skin tone in addition to the lack of ink fucking up the effect completely. Because I'm hearing 50 complaints from you motherfuckers and 0 pieces of helpful advice barring one 2nd hand remark made by someone who has good intentions but isn't helping in the end. You literally dedicated your post body to mostly insulting me instead of elaborating. >>4306 I am getting a job before I get a card. It shouldn't be a problem if it's that's the case. The only problem might be stingy landlords who would find it too little income even if I only go to the cheapest apartments.

>>4305 Your marker technique looks amateur. >Honestly though thank God I didn't, it would have been embarassing to put up even small art next to other people's on the small 5x5 paper sketch pad they have out for testing with these colors. I mean all the other art on it was tumblr tier shit made by 12 year olds riffing off Jamie Hewlett but shit if I wouldn't look just as bad thanks to this. >markers are locked behind the case <there's a testpad you can use to test the markers out Which one is it faggot? Or did you do that narcisstic autist thing where you felt "too embarrassed" to ask a store employee to open the case and let you test?

>>4309 In addition Mr, Now Deleted >Scared to put his art on a sketchpad to test things Not the case, they don't let you use the markers for testing, you need to buy them immediately, this is because they're not just going to stand there and wait for you to test each marker until you find the one you want to make sure you don't steal. You either know you buy what you want is what you want or you don't. >>4311 See above. >So how did other people do it? They used colored pencils which they don't give a shit about people stealing, they lose maybe a dollar if someone does. Copic markers on the other hand are worth almost 10 per marker because of some dumb reason.

>>4305 >Honestly though thank God I didn't, it would have been embarassing to put up even small art next to other people's on the small 5x5 paper sketch pad they have out for testing with these colors. I mean all the other art on it was tumblr tier shit made by 12 year olds riffing off Jamie Hewlett but shit if I wouldn't look just as bad thanks to this. Nobody cares about this but you, nobody is critiquing the fucking test art here except you narcisstic autistic asshole. >>4310 >But the tools I was using were literally incorrect to begin with, and I wouldn't have this problem if I could have just used them myself before buying them. Did you ask anyone if you could, or just assume you couldn't? >So what in specific is wrong with it? Human skin tone is not one color, despite what all the anime you've watched has told you. Skin is semi-translucent, which is most obviously when looking at the veins on your hand or wrist. This means light passes through it at oblique angles, but gets scattered when hitting it directly. There's also the blood vessels to consider as well. With the three colors you've acquired from the store you can make a good skintone, but it would require layering which you do zero of. >You literally dedicated your post body to mostly insulting me instead of elaborating. That's because I hate you and people like you with every fiber of my being. >>4312 >Not the case, they don't let you use the markers for testing, you need to buy them immediately, this is because they're not just going to stand there and wait for you to test each marker until you find the one you want to make sure you don't steal. Did you ask or did you assume this was the case?

>>4313 >Human skin tone is not one color, despite what all the anime you've watched has told you. Skin is semi-translucent, which is most obviously when looking at the veins on your hand or wrist. This means light passes through it at oblique angles, but gets scattered when hitting it directly. There's also the blood vessels to consider as well. With the three colors you've acquired from the store you can make a good skintone, but it would require layering which you do zero of. ONE OF THE MARKERS IS BROKEN >Nobody cares about this but you, nobody is critiquing the fucking test art here except you narcisstic autistic asshole. THAT'S CRAZY BUT YES MULTIPLE PEOPLE DO TUMBLR ART IS GENERALLY CONSIDERED BOTTOM BIN AND MY POINT IS I'D BE ON THERE LEVEL AFTER THAT >That's because I hate you and people like you with every fiber of my being. I LOVE YOU TOO ANON >Did you ask or did you assume this was the case? >Did you ask anyone if you could, or just assume you couldn't? THE EMPLOYEE IN SPECIFIC TAKES THE MARKERS YOU TAKE OUT RIGHT OUT OF YOUR HAND THE MOMENT YOU TAKE IT OUT AND GOES DIRECTLY TO THE REGISTER WITH IT I NEED TO CLARIFY THIS IN RED TEXT BECAUSE IT SEEMS NONE OF YOU ARE LISTENING TO ME >>4314 Nigger.

>>4319 >THAT'S CRAZY BUT YES MULTIPLE PEOPLE DO TUMBLR ART IS GENERALLY CONSIDERED BOTTOM BIN AND MY POINT IS I'D BE ON THERE LEVEL AFTER THAT Yeah tumblr art is garbage, that's not the problem autist. The problem is giving a single fucking shit about it when it's on a 5x5 pad. I don't disagree with you that it's bad, it's the narcissistic "I am above these loser" mindset coming out of someone who has never had a fucking job. The problem is literally feeling embarassment using a testing pad for it's intended purpose because another autistic judgemental asshole like you might come along and think that anything on the 5x5 sketchpad in a fucking shop fucking matters. >THE EMPLOYEE IN SPECIFIC TAKES THE MARKERS YOU TAKE OUT RIGHT OUT OF YOUR HAND THE MOMENT YOU TAKE IT OUT AND GOES DIRECTLY TO THE REGISTER WITH IT DID YOU FUCKING ASK OR DID YOU NOT FUCKING ASK? DID THE WORDS "CAN I TEST THESE MARKERS?" COME OUT OF YOUR CHEETOH DUST COVERED MOUTH OR DID YOU JUST GET MANDHANDLED LIKE A LITTLE BITCH?

>>4320 >DID YOU FUCKING ASK OR DID YOU NOT FUCKING ASK? DID THE WORDS "CAN I TEST THESE MARKERS?" COME OUT OF YOUR CHEETOH DUST COVERED MOUTH OR DID YOU JUST GET MANDHANDLED LIKE A LITTLE BITCH? You know what? Just for you when I go back to return that marker, I'm going to explicitly ask them to let me, just for you. But no, I didn't, because it took 5 seconds for the whole thing to happen, they literally take the markers out of your hand before you can open the cap.

>>4323 >Just for you when I go back to return that marker, I'm going to explicitly ask them to let me, just for you. Good, fucking finally. Maybe this retarded autist might just be teachable after all. >But no, I didn't, because it took 5 seconds for the whole thing to happen, they literally take the markers out of your hand before you can open the cap. Yes, vendors are lazy and want to do their job fast, if you have a need fucking voice it. They can't read your mind and they don't even need to be nice.

>>4327 back to cg

>>4329 hurtcore

from my observation, skin tone is made up mostly og yellows, oranges, violets, pinks, and reds. You might throw in a bit more blue for veins or yellow and white for bony parts or more red for more blood filled parts. In addition to there are all the colors of the light reflected from the surrounding and the light source which leads to a sumphony of colors. P.S. What's up with those trigger posts? Are Feds now focusing our little gay drawing corner?

>>4350 >What's up with those trigger posts? Are Feds now focusing our little gay drawing corner? This. I have no idea what is going on or who these people are. Would be great if an insider were to clarify things.

https://copic.jp/en/color/ you can look at all the colors they have and the swatches are layered lightest to heaviest application. Compared to the scanned image I would say it's pretty accurate. I went and took a look at the markers contained in their skintone pack, which seems to be probably what anon was looking for. E00 is the lightest tone in the pack. Compared to YR00 which is the marker anon bought. E30 and E41 don't seem like bad options either.

How long should it take to receive a reply for a job application? I was told office people don't work weekends but I still feel uneasy. Anyway, I have 4lbs worth of cookie dough I won't be eating. Is there any way I can sell it? I hear people do that through doordash or whatever. It's close to 5 actually upon double checking.

>>4363 the N-word Also you should contact them again, it's kind of stupid but expected that (You) follow up rather than the HR roastie.

>>4363 nigga

>>4363 Who was going to say nigger?

>>4363 >Anyway, I have 4lbs worth of cookie dough I won't be eating. Is there any way I can sell it? What?

>>4368 Your faith in the son of G-d is strong

It took almost a month but I finally finished draining all my money out of the bank without getting my account frozen.

>>4369 Hang on let me give you a photo. >>4366 Contact who? I have only two contact links regarding email for the corporation I'm applying to work at through their online portal. A marketing account simply telling me to join their social media, and one specific link sending account for screenings that explicitly says "DO NOT REPLY." >>4371 Where do you put your money instead Mr, Jew Money?

>>4374 >>4369

Well there has certainly been an interesting development in the past two minutes. >Got mail >It's a fucking pair of checks for a total of 3k because of: >"Refund Fed Student Loan" >"Title IV Advance" Can someone tell me what the fuck this shit is for and if I can legally use it to just rent an apartment immediately And open my own bank account. I have no generative income just yet. I might be able to get a debit card and bank account for it first but maybe they would let me get a credit card too. But legally speaking I need to double check if I can use this stuff to just fund my personal lucrative income plan or not. Reportedly >If you withdraw from the university and have received financial aid, any refundable amount of your institutional charges (tuition and fees and/or university housing costs) may be returned to the appropriate financial aid sources. According to a Google Search the most likely explanation is that because I didn't take physical classes or some shit thanks to the vaccine now I have this money? But why on Earth would they give it back to me? Shouldn't it go back to the fund source from who ever gave it to the federal loan program then to me? Or am I just allowed to use this money for whatever housing I pick as of this time even if away from campus? Can someone help me legally figure this shit out? Can I just get an apartment now or should I just wait until I get a job first and discard this money because it might count as misplacement of funds that could be punishable by law? I know I'm essentially asking you to do my homework for me, but please help a nigga out. I'm still going to try getting a job obviously but ideally I'd like to use this to help me out.

And by the way I know this entire chain of posts sounds like a giant clusterfuck of larps that contradicts itself, and deep down I wish it was but I'm not joking about any of this.

You know we should really have a legal board for shit like this but since we don't >Student loans can be used to pay for room and board, which includes both on- and off-campus housing. So the short answer is yes, students can use money from their loans to pay monthly rent for apartments and other forms of residence away from campus. Answers that question, thank God. However upon just doing some basic research on bank accounts >Some might require a fee to open an account I'm still questioning on whether or not to join a bank or not, a credit union apparently has no monthly fees but I need outside opinions. As desperate as I am I don't want to make crippling financial decisions early on just because I'm in a rush and just got a handout. Well handout in a vague sense, personally in my opinion after all the labor I've put in my art 3k sounds fair as a return from the universe.

>>4378 Credit unions are generally better, but it depends on the specific union. Think the difference between a soulless corporation and a small local business.

>>4379 That' going to be quite hard to figure out because all my local one's have no reviews or mixed reviews except yelp does this shit thing where it lists a credit union near you but the reviews are for the chain nationwide and not near you in specific, how do I evaluate them?

This will probably be stupid question for a lot of you, but is an id required for a bank account registration?

>>4389 Or to be exact I have id but not photo id cards which my mother tells me I should have before moving out but I'd rather not get any and just register and move fast.

>>4389 >>4390 It is 100%, no doubts about it, legally required, that you have a government issued photo-ID for getting a bank account. If you are going to be living on your own, you need a damn photo ID. Get a damn photo ID ASAP. Today might be good.

>>4376 >>4378 Have you considered actually talking to FAFSA? Like pick up a phone and call them nigger? They sound like the absolute authority on the matter, so you should fucking call them, or if you still have issues with that, email them. Hey look what I found for you nigger. https://studentaid.gov/help-center/contact#all-aid-fsaic Go fucking talk to someone whose job it is to answer these questions so you don't get absolutely fucked retard. >Well handout in a vague sense, personally in my opinion after all the labor I've put in my art 3k sounds fair as a return from the universe. That's not how a loan works. At all, if you think this, you will bury yourself in a deep pile of shit very quickly. Those 3k dollars aren't a gift, knowing the fact you're an artist it will probably cost you 6k to borrow that 3k.

>>4392 https://www.investopedia.com/ask/answers/072416/can-student-loans-be-used-pay-rent.asp#:~:text=Student%20loans%20can%20be%20used,of%20residence%20away%20from%20campus.

>>4374 >Where do you put your money instead Mr, Jew Money? Somewhere that will not lose value due to money printer go brrr. >>4376 >it might count as misplacement of funds that could be punishable by law? To receive money by mistake is not a criminal offense. If it was a mistake they will simply ask you to give back the money. >Can I just get an apartment now or should I just wait until I get a job first You will have a hard time finding an apartment without a job because rentcucks like you are very high risk. You could use your parents as guarantors though if you think you can make it in time. >4378 >I'm still questioning on whether or not to join a bank or not, a credit union apparently has no monthly fees Are you a full time student under the age of 24? Most banks offer student accounts with no fee at all. They will even give you money for doing certain types of transactions. You will need 2 photo id and proof of school attendance.

>>4396 >You will have a hard time finding an apartment without a job because rentcucks like you are very high risk. You could use your parents as guarantors though if you think you can make it in time. What do you recommend I do then Mr. Jewstein, buy a house? Take out a mortgage? Because at this point I'm considering it. You were totally right all apartments I've checked thus far are 1.5-1.9k at the cheapest in my immediate vicinity, even worse that isn't the problem, the problem is leasing, if they don't offer a month to month lease contract then I'll be fucked by month 3 if I can't reinvest my time to getting higher paying jobs like I plan to, of course we all know plans don't always go how we want. Although the most annoying thing about this whole ordeal is that my mother just immediately told me off regarding the whole thing because she told me I won't find a month to month lease, I had to scream at her that it's at least worth going to see all those vacant apartments then just asking the landlord there and then if I can get a month to month lease. Shout out to the guy in this thread always trying to get me to speak to people. You will get your wish at last. I found a apartment for $900 in >Yonkers Which works well since I can stretch out my cash to 4 months there, and get a better job there. But I still want to see all my options. >Are you a full time student under the age of 24? Most banks offer student accounts with no fee at all. They will even give you money for doing certain types of transactions. You will need 2 photo id and proof of school attendance. This might be a problem, I can only present maybe one photo id, and can only provide online attendance.

>>4399 >What do you recommend I do then Mr. Jewstein, buy a house? Take out a mortgage? Banks will not give you a mortgage because: <You are a student <You have no job <You have no credit history <You have no bank account >if they don't offer a month to month lease contract then I'll be fucked by month 3 if I can't reinvest my time to getting higher paying jobs like I plan to Month to month is too risky for the landlord so an annual lease is pretty much the standard. You can find another tenant to replace you though if you want to leave early without breaking the lease. >I can only present maybe one photo id, and can only provide online attendance. Online school is fine. Give him a copy of your grade report. You need 2 photo id so you better get 2 photo id goy.

>>4401 >You need 2 photo id so you better get 2 photo id goy. That's a big problem I don't have a driver's license and I likely can't get a passport either. >You can find another tenant to replace you though if you want to leave early without breaking the lease. I guess I can try to include that in the contract or some shit but still you're fucking me up here jewman. >Banks will not give you a mortgage because: Actually they can, they just likely won't. That won't stop me from trying if I need to.

>>4402 I do not know what to say anymore. I am almost certain you are making a horrible financial decision but you appear to be beyond help.

>>4406 Objectively correct on a level you can't even fathom, and you are doing the right thing. I'm either going to end up living in the hood as one of the 3 white men in a building at any given time while working during hours that increase my chances of getting shot by 500%, or end up making a personal loan with unsavory people because despite what I said no rational bank, credit union, or mortgage broker would ever give me a loan, even if legally speaking, they can. Whatever their loss when they see the mafia getting repayed and they regret not financing my ludicrous and risky business proposition. I need to at this point because I promised myself I'd kill myself before December if I don't get my own place before the year ends.

>>4421 >I promised myself I'd kill myself before December I see you have already planned it out. I will look forward to that then.

>>4422 Yeah probably.

Ok I'm desperate and unlikely to find any handouts or even regular wagie jobs at this point. Whatever your loss you dumb fucking money grubbing chimp yuppies, you could have doubled your money just by giving me enough to rent out low income housing for a year or mortgage the cheapest home possible.I promise I will use whatever influence I gain from this day forward to burning down the system that brought you to power in the first place for this. Out of desperation I'm open to just applying for a gallery exhibit, my works if nothing else, are fuck off big, and should nab some money at least. So I'll just ask already can I get some tips on filtering out which galleries to go for. Keep in mind I'm in NYC and don't really want to just apply to the biggest one's immediately and then just get told "Sorry regardless of the quality of your work we don't just let anyone in here." You know before just having to do so myself and sending out 50+ applications then just saying which one's say yes.

Minute update but I managed to lose all $3k. Not like through gambling or the stock market, or getting scammed. I just straight up checked the last place I put >my money and it was gone. Exactly like that one joke in American Dad where Stan lost $20k on the bus. He just left it there and forgot. I either am misremembering, or someone took it and honestly I don't care. Wouldn't have helped anyway. I need to just dive head first into seeking out a showcase or get a job because as I said before $3k isn't enough to get rent in New York state because the landlord cucks in this state for everyone into a year long lease for retard reasons even with low income housing or whatever, as a matter of fact to even be considered for rent you need to make a specific amount a year, In essence screwing me over far more than before. Whatever, time to just apply already, it's not like I have anything left to lose, worst case scenario I die by taking my own life on November 27th.

>>4424 >>4433 fuck, sorry to hear all that dude. i'm in a similar situation. no income, bleeding what little savings I have dry just to get to the next day. fuck china, fuck biden, and fuck covid.

>>4434 Thanks man, you too, but for all it's worth, personally I think this would have happened even if covid hadn't. I hope you recover, because it hasn't and likely won't even begin for me.

>>4424 Shotgun application method is the only application method. You'd be able to bypass this if you had friend's but you don't.

>>4436 Nigger where the fuck am I going to buy a shotgun with no money?

>>4435 you too bro, even though we both suffer, we do not suffer alone. cold comfort I know, but in these dark times we take what little comfort we can get I guess. If the worst comes to the worst i'll see you on the other side brother. but I am preying (to whatever gods might be listening) that we (all) survive this fucked up time in history.

>>4438 Agreed, even if in the end I can't make it, I hope you do.

>>4437 Not suicide you fucking retard. You apply to all galleries everywhere that you can. You don't get to play smart, you only get to grind out rejection after rejection.

>>4438 >this dark age where I thought I could walk out of a house with zero ID, zero income and zero background and people would just give me a job, a bank account and an apartment.

>>4433 Have you unironically considered military service? Even they'll take you unless you're a cripple or retard.

>>4440 Oh. That's what you meant ok, see, I'm going through a very bad time so I hear the word shotgun and I immediately think "I should really fucking shoot myself." Don't worry I will apply to literally all galleries in a 1000 mile radius. >This wouldn't be necessary if you had friends Funny thing, I do, but only juniors at the earliest get gallery opportunities, sophomores like me get fucked. >>4442 Funny thing, I am too stupid to be a military boot, and can't apply for medical reasons so am essentially crippled too. I cannot walk long distances, so they would reject me.

Good news everyone, I've finally finished making multiple works unconnected to school and can finally send them in for gallery applications assuming they're not posh and queer enough to pre screen based on status and following in an application than view work directly. >Wait all that bitching and you didn't apply yet? Yes, I spent the last two days just improving work. Ironically it's been some of my best thus far. >Why I don't know if school policy won't let me sell works in specific made for school which a lot of mine were, I'll send one or two, maybe 3 in anyway just to test the waters and see if I get a cease and desist or partial claim of revenue on their end regardless. See what that's all about. I haven't even started my history classes homework yet and am also going to have to speed run it. I'll have to shotgun send applications first to galleries once I wake up, but I'll get it done by tomorrow hear me now. I won't even eat until I do. And lord knows I need to, I've been binge eating the past week out of stress ok we all know I didn't need to but I wanted to and no one can stop me. Here goes nothing, by the next time I post I'll have harassed one of the gallery agents by phone if I need to, to apply. They will probably reply faster than the goddamn wagie job I applied for will, still no such response just yet on whether or not I passed the screening for a part time grocery stocking job. HERE GOES EVERYTHING AND NOTHING BOYS IN 8 HOURS AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

>>4458 I've never heard of school having claim to revenue from students work they sell. There could be legal issues for selling copyist recreations of masterworks, but that's more copyright infringement than anything your school has to do with. Reading a little into the matter, galleries may not *be interested* in student work, as, if you have feedback from other students and a professor, they may not feel it is "representative" of your work, but that's not something that says you can't have student work in a gallery, they just might not be interested. tl:dr Your school has zero claim to any work you produce in the process of completing your program of study.

I have developed a huge resistance towards drawing. I subconsciously avoid drawing as much as possible. I find it unusual since I am very successful in my other endeavors. I have tried all kinds of methods to make drawing easier but none of them worked. The simplest explanation I could give is that things are boring at the lowest level of competence but as our ability rises the frustration lowers. Learning to draw without prior experience is just as unpleasant as learning to ride a bike when you cannot even maintain balance. This also explains why I enjoy activities I am proficient at despite things being much harder at a higher level. "Just draw and you will improve bro" is easy in theory but difficult in practice though and I really do not want to spend more time struggling. I started drawing during the covid lockdown but I feel like I am still in the beginner phase. I am not sure I want to put more time into drawing anymore because the realization that I am below-mediocre even after more than a year of practice is disheartening. Meanwhile I do not want to give up because I have already spent a lot of time and money on this hobby. I know that this is a sunken cost fallacy but I cannot help feeling this way. Since this board is full of professional artists I would appreciate if you could share your experience from when you were a beginner to help me make an enlightened decision.

>>4462 Do you draw because you enjoy it or because you feel something meaningful in the experience?

>>4464 >Do you draw because you enjoy it I do not enjoy the process of drawing. I find looking at the finished piece more enjoyable. I like watching live drawing too. >you feel something meaningful in the experience I picked up drawing because I was bored. Life was beginning to feel meaningless and everyday I would wake up with the feeling of emptiness in my heart. I decided that drawing would fill the void and make my life meaningful again. So I suppose drawing is kind of meaningful? It is not really a passion or anything though. Just a hobby to kill time.

>>4465 >I do not enjoy the process of drawing. Do you find the process physically/emotionally/mentally painful? Just boring? I don't believe you have to enjoy it per se, but is the experience negative? >I find looking at the finished piece more enjoyable. I like watching live drawing too. Have you ever enjoyed looking at your own finished product? Not even in a "it's a good piece of work" fashion, but, just comparing what you made at first to what you are making now? >I picked up drawing because I was bored. As good as anything to pick up I suppose. Recall why exactly? >Life was beginning to feel meaningless and everyday I would wake up with the feeling of emptiness in my heart. I decided that drawing would fill the void and make my life meaningful again. Decent strategy, good to keep doing something instead of nothing, you can try and isolate what you did find meaningful, see if it's really only in drawing or if it might show up in other places. >So I suppose drawing is kind of meaningful? It is not really a passion or anything though. >Just a hobby to kill time. It doesn't need to be a passion to be meaningful, it can just be a good guide to get you closer to something important, and if it's just to kill time anything will do, won't it? Now that I have more context. >>4462 >The simplest explanation I could give is that things are boring at the lowest level of competence but as our ability rises the frustration lowers. >Learning to draw without prior experience is just as unpleasant as learning to ride a bike when you cannot even maintain balance. >This also explains why I enjoy activities I am proficient at despite things being much harder at a higher level. This general rule applies to everything, you tend to be good at things you enjoy, but, you also tend to enjoy what you are good at. This isn't always the case, but in general, this is how it works. However, if you don't enjoy it, and you aren't good at it, then it's going to be tough fight getting to where you are actually good at it. Which is where the meaningful angle comes in. >"Just draw and you will improve bro" is easy in theory but difficult in practice though and I really do not want to spend more time struggling. That is not easy in theory, it is simple. Simple things can be incredibly difficult. No one wants to spend time working on things they assume they will never be good at either, it's an understandable feeling. >I started drawing during the covid lockdown but I feel like I am still in the beginner phase. Have you compared your work at the very start to where you are now, or are you comparing your work to where others are? >I am not sure I want to put more time into drawing anymore because the realization that I am below-mediocre even after more than a year of practice is disheartening. >Meanwhile I do not want to give up because I have already spent a lot of time and money on this hobby. I know that this is a sunken cost fallacy but I cannot help feeling this way. >Since this board is full of professional artists I would appreciate if you could share your experience from when you were a beginner to help me make an enlightened decision. Here are my thoughts on the matter. If you're just doing this to kill time, and you're not enjoying it, fuck off. Pushing yourself to do it will just make you resent the activity. I'm not saying you need "passion" to be good, but rather your frustration and resentment will build up faster than your skill if you force these types of situations, and you will actively sabotage yourself, as you have discovered. There is a very real and visceral possibility you will never be good enough to sell your work comfortable, or bar that, never even produce anything worth looking at. Over the course of thousands of years millions of others have broke themselves on those rocks having never made anything that anybody gives a shit about. I will say that drawing gets easier the better you get at it, that goes back to what I already mentioned. People tend to be good at things they like, but it's also true that people tend to like things they are good it, and the constant erosion of how shit you are can wear you down. The most important thing you need to realize though, at least diagnosing you from a distance, having only read two god damn posts with which to know you, is that you do not enjoy the "play" of making art, but I do not detect a single enjoyment or vision of what you want to do with art. Drawing as a gestalt is an activity designed to bring something into existence, the better you are, the easier it is to bring that something here. You can either enjoy the process, and not give a single shit about what you produce (porn artists who will draw literally anything fall here, the type of people to draw fanart go here), or, you can feel neutral or even hate the process, but feel there is something so vitally important you need to get out that it needs to be done or something awful will fucking happen. I can now only branch into the anecdotal. I hate how much I suck at drawing. Seeing myself physically failing to make something look good tears me into pieces. It grinds me down, and makes me never want to look at a page again. Yet, the crushing overwhelming feeling I have every single fucking day, is that if I do not try to get that much better, if I do not try doing something to improve at my craft, something terrible will fucking happen. I don't know what, I don't know why, I don't fucking know any of that shit. All I know is that if I get into bed, and I didn't do any drawing practice that day, I feel physically ill. Yet deep inside of me, if I git gud at what I am doing, if I get good enough, something wonderful could happen, something important could help, and the world could be that much better. Maybe my rambling hasn't touched you at all, maybe you didn't even read this shit, hell if I know. Thank you for reading if you did. It doesn't need to be black and white either, maybe you just need a short break to prevent burn out, maybe you never try again, there's no shame in leaving what is an incredibly painful thing to get good at. I leave the question up to you, why are you drawing? What are you trying to do? Or what do you actually enjoy?

>>4466 >you can feel neutral or even hate the process, but feel there is something so vitally important you need to get out that it needs to be done or something awful will fucking happen. I'd like to emphasize this point. This is applicable to any form of self expression. It could be a song that you have been writing in your head and must perform with an instrument, it could be a story with characters that you absolutely must write down, it could be an idea that you need to express in clearly written words. Whatever it is, there is a great deal of satisfaction in simply relieving yourself of the pressure that the idea was exerting on you. Now, returning to the original question >>4462 I found that once I began learning to draw, I could explore an entirely new way to express thoughts, ideas, feelings, etc. Mind you, my level of skill was not particularly relevant. It was merely the idea that I could express myself using images of my own creation. This is the core of why I continue to practice drawing: I am developing a tool that will allow me to clearly express myself. In the same way that a writer must have a concrete grasp of language to make themselves understood, I must have a solid foundation of drawing so that I can illustrate the thoughts inside my head. I found that being able to express myself, however crudely, was joyful. A simple gondola drawn in MS Paint was enough to make me feel a little glimmer of satisfaction. I might describe it as a childlike joy (note: childlike, not childish). Drawing didn't suddenly bring a great deal of meaning or give my life some renewed purpose. For a beginner, this struggle to articulate oneself is extremely frustrating. Take the language learning process, for example. I believe many adults (at least, American adults) give up on a second language because they are confounded by a lack of expressive ability. When you are first learning a new language (take French, for example), you will have the same ability to express yourself as a toddler. Because we are so familiar with our native tongue, we are totally unprepared for this reality. All of a sudden, we desperately want to ask a basic question, e.g. "How many kilometers away is the nearest gas station?" but we struggle to find the words. The same applies to drawing, only the question is not expressed in words. The beginner wants to draw a building that they have imagined, but without a proper understanding of perspective, the building is skewed and not realistic. The result is crude, and the beginner is frustrated because it is not at all what they envisioned. This is getting somewhat off-topic, but here is an interesting essay talking about the experience of "relief from an idea" https://eggreport.substack.com/p/wittgenstone-age-mindset

I have begun, the vague application process, to one one museum gallery. I'll apply to more over night because I need to, the one I applied to is literally among the top 5 in NYC which is weird, because every small, literally named after the owner gallery I checked didn't have an application process, and ironically this fuck off big one did. I have also found two more potential vague application emails. The first one is for a private buyer for this small gallery, I don't know how much I'd get paid if I just cold approached them to buy my work but I'm not even sure I can. It might just be only for agents looking to deal their artists work. I also found a "curator" email for a hispanic gallery, which I am of by the way, so I should be able to apply, but I'm not sure if a curator general email would count as a portal to simply state "Yeah is this where I ask to exhibit my work?" or "Aquí es donde pido exhibir mis obras?" but it can't hurt to ask right? I spent the past three hours looking through 50 galleries in NYC to do this by the way. Support the arts my ass, 99% of them had no direct application openings or even anything beyond very vague contact sections, one even had a "Please don't send unsolicited works for exhibition, we don't need any." Statement. Fuck you too C24. Now I need to look for open calls and shit. >Well why didn't you do that first? Fuck you, I didn't even know the term until minutes ago, and the few open calls I saw were asking for groups not one artist. >>4462 >Since this board is full of professional artists I would appreciate if you could share your experience from when you were a beginner to help me make an enlightened decision. Ha. But no really I don't know what you want me to say here chief, I have always just drawn since I was a child. I have literally 0 other skill sets. I have nothing else to do, I will literally fucking die if I don't get a job as an artist soon, I cannot function doing anything else, I have literally zero other things to do in life please God help me. It's not something I forced myself to do, I was forced into it. My recommendation is that if you don't enjoy the base experience and process of drawing you should reconsider. Looking at most art I've found, is always gayer than making it. >Drawing would fill the void and make my life meaningful again Funny, it did the exact opposite for me and made everything else in life devoid of meaning. >>4459 Never heard of≠Unlikely to happen. Like I said I'll fucking do it anyway, I don't give a fuck if I get a cease and desist, I'm testing it out. You're right though, it's unlikely that's the case, but I suspect some penalty would be in order like the school requiring you to have work made for them on hand even if you were already given passing credit for that class.

>>4468 >Hispanic jew Yorker art student praises Hitler Pottery

>>4468 >Never heard of≠Unlikely to happen. Sure, you know what would be definitive? You reading any legal documents the University made you sign. You did read those right spic? You didn't sign something you didn't understand right?

>>4466 >Do you find the process physically/emotionally/mentally painful? Just boring? I don't believe you have to enjoy it per se, but is the experience negative? It is frustrating because I cannot draw whatever I want due to my lack of skill. In order to get there I need to study the fundamentals but they are boring. Imagine trying to write a story in a foreign language without knowing a single word. Even after learning the meaning of the basic words you still need to learn the grammar and other intricacies which could take years. >Have you ever enjoyed looking at your own finished product? Not even in a "it's a good piece of work" fashion, but, just comparing what you made at first to what you are making now? I did make a few good drawings and I like looking at them. I do notice a considerate improvement from when I first began. I do not believe they are good enough though. >Recall why exactly? To keep it short: <life is too comfortable because I have everything I want <covid lockdown comes around and I get 6 months vacation <somehow instead of feeling happy I feel constant existential dread gnawing away at me <read self help books and get into spirituality <reach the conclusion that the only 2 ways to fill the emptiness in my heart is 1. meditation 2. creative activity <the only creative activity that comes to my mind is drawing because I like to look at beautiful illustrations >if it's just to kill time anything will do, won't it? I cannot think of any other creative activity I would enjoy doing. I probably will not get into music production or story writing. Plus I think in images instead of words or sounds so drawing is the most natural activity for me. >you can try and isolate what you did find meaningful, see if it's really only in drawing Sadly I have not found anything meaningful in drawing yet. It is quite effective at filling the hole in my heart though. >Have you compared your work at the very start to where you are now, or are you comparing your work to where others are? To other people. >you can feel neutral or even hate the process, but feel there is something so vitally important you need to get out that it needs to be done or something awful will fucking happen. I like the idea of expressing myself visually without being limited by my skill level so that puts me in this second category I guess? >Maybe my rambling hasn't touched you at all, maybe you didn't even read this shit, hell if I know. Thank you for reading if you did. Sounds like you have reached the higher levels of your craft. I have no idea how drawing feels like at your level of proficiency but as someone who has almost achieved mastery in another craft I can say that your intuitions are correct. Keep going and you will find new pleasures and insights you never even suspected before. I am not entirely certain about these answers myself: >I leave the question up to you, why are you drawing? To fill the emptiness in my heart and make life more meaningful. >What are you trying to do? To achieve mastery in drawing. >Or what do you actually enjoy? I enjoy being good at something and to have complete control over something i.e., mastery. I enjoy being able to make my computer do exactly what I want it to do. Which is why I think I will enjoy being able to draw exactly what I want to draw. I would like to thank you for your reply. While reading and writing a response I realize that the pleasure I would experience after mastering drawing will far outweigh the effort I am currently putting in. So I should probably stick to it. As you said I should take a break to avoid burning out. >>4467 I think your experience perfectly mirrors my own. Especially this part >The beginner wants to draw a building that they have imagined, but without a proper understanding of perspective, the building is skewed and not realistic. The result is crude, and the beginner is frustrated because it is not at all what they envisioned. Actually you are articulating my current situation better than myself. It must have taken you a lot of work to overcome the initial hurdle and reach your current skill level. I suppose if you managed to master drawing while sharing similar circumstances then I should be able to do it too. Thank you for the hope.

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>>4468 >I have always just drawn since I was a child. I have literally 0 other skill sets. I have nothing else to do Sadly I was not born with the sole task of becoming a successful artist. Looks like you were gifted with a natural inclination towards drawing so I cannot relate at all. >My recommendation is that if you don't enjoy the base experience and process of drawing you should reconsider. I am trying to avoid drawing as much as possible because the process is too tedious so you are probably right. >Funny, it did the exact opposite for me and made everything else in life devoid of meaning. How? I wish you good luck in your endeavors.

>>4469 Yes? Dude, we Hispanics are like the 2nd biggest group of Nazi's on the planet. They literally escaped to our countries post WW2. You jealous or something? >>4472 >How? I literally did not develop any additional skills unrelated to media. I literally just stated I got rejected for a minimum wagie job at a grocery chain because it's been 10 days and they haven't replied yet. I have literally 0 additional skills. It's over if I can't make it as an artist. That's not an exaggeration in any way. Nothing brings me any joy any longer if it's unrelated to aesthetics and art.

>>4472 >To other people. You sound compare to yourself as you were yesterday, a week ago, a month ago, a year ago. Sure, take a look at a masterpiece sometimes, hell, even try to copy what it does and see what you manage, but the majority of the time, what other people have done does not fucking matter. Keep your head down looking at where you were yesterday, and don't compare yourself to anybody else. >Sounds like you have reached the higher levels of your craft. Not even close kid. I got probably 35 years left to live and I haven't even taken the first step properly yet. >I have no idea how drawing feels like at your level of proficiency but as someone who has almost achieved mastery in another craft I can say that your intuitions are correct. >Keep going and you will find new pleasures and insights you never even suspected before. I'm well aware of what awaits me should I take that step forward, but, thank you for the encouragement. >To fill the emptiness in my heart and make life more meaningful. You might find something similar to drawing as well, leave the door open. I don't know how vague you're using the term, but you might be legitimately disposed to painting instead. It sounds like you need a creative outlet, but drawing isn't the end all be all. >To achieve mastery in drawing. Yeah, but why? Because you want to enjoy drawing process or because there's something you need to make? "I don't know" is an acceptable answer, but start thinking about it, the nuance is important for how you approach things.This response makes it sound like your goal is to "enjoy drawing", which is a bit of a shite goal because every moment you don't enjoy drawing is a failure, as opposed to you having any success states. >I enjoy being good at something and to have complete control over something i.e., mastery. I enjoy being able to make my computer do exactly what I want it to do. Which is why I think I will enjoy being able to draw exactly what I want to draw. Ah see, a programmer, you're one of those intellectual types that can think real clear and articulate well, but now you're faced with a task where your dumb muscles need to keep up with your head. Good luck friend, what you need is practice. It reminds me of one of Salvador Doli's interviews "I am too intelligent to be a good painter." >I would like to thank you for your reply. While reading and writing a response I realize that the pleasure I would experience after mastering drawing will far outweigh the effort I am currently putting in. So I should probably stick to it. As you said I should take a break to avoid burning out. Good idea. I will again state if you articulate to yourself either a clear goal that you attempting to progress towards, or a clear process you are attempting to improve each time you practice, you're going to find the negative walls easier to get over. You want to be honest with yourself, about what you currently are capable of, what you want to be capable of, and how you're going to get from where you are to where you want to be, in the most simplistic, small, practical instructions to yourself possible. The suffering gets a lot easier if you frame it as a means of progressing towards something. and you got to find that sweet spot between "not trying hard enough" and "absolutely breaking yourself against the process". It sounds like you're leaning into the latter a bit too hard.

>>4474 >Keep your head down looking at where you were yesterday, and don't compare yourself to anybody else. It is hard to focus with so many good artists online and on /loomis/ but I will try. >I don't know how vague you're using the term, but you might be legitimately disposed to painting instead. It sounds like you need a creative outlet, but drawing isn't the end all be all. I feel like drawing would allow me to replicate the images I see in my head with the most accuracy but I do plan to dabble painting and other mediums once I get past the beginner hell of drawing. >Yeah, but why? Because you want to enjoy drawing process or because there's something you need to make? I think it is a mixture of both but I lean more towards the final product because that is what I value the most. >Good luck friend, what you need is practice. I have already written a program to optimize my practice. I think I need to do more research on human productivity to further optimize my strategy and hopefully make drawing easier. >if you articulate to yourself either a clear goal that you attempting to progress towards, or a clear process you are attempting to improve each time you practice, you're going to find the negative walls easier to get over. You want to be honest with yourself, about what you currently are capable of, what you want to be capable of, and how you're going to get from where you are to where you want to be, in the most simplistic, small, practical instructions to yourself possible. The suffering gets a lot easier if you frame it as a means of progressing towards something. Ah yes the SMART goals. Somehow I managed to deviate my planning from these criteria. Now I definitely need to rethink my strategy. Thank you for your advice. This exchange has cleared all doubts over my hobby. I shall only concern myself with going forward from now on.

>>4472 >It is hard to focus with so many good artists online and on /loomis/ but I will try. Don't try, decide on how you will respond to future thoughts comparing yourself, and monitor if you are doing so. It's very rarely worthwhile to do so. What are you actually trying to gain when you do it? If you aren't gaining anything, why do it? >I have already written a program to optimize my practice. I think I need to do more research on human productivity to further optimize my strategy and hopefully make drawing easier. Mind sharing the details? I'm mildly curious. >Ah yes the SMART goals. Somehow I managed to deviate my planning from these criteria. Now I definitely need to rethink my strategy. Ehhhh, CGPGrey SMART goals have like, one piece of the puzzle. It's a good piece of the puzzle, but I don't think it's the full story. Better than nothing I suppose.

>>4476 >Mind sharing the details? I'm mildly curious. Nothing complicated. The program handles the execution and is a pomodoro timer with a checklist of daily tasks. The hard part is knowing what goal to set and how to increment them which is where all the self improvement theories like SMART goals come in. Aside from the task itself you also need to take into account external factors. Basically it is about creating a schedule and a workspace that facilitates the completion of the task while requiring as little willpower as possible. >What are you actually trying to gain when you do it? Looking at the finished product of people who are better than me motivates me to work harder and surpass them. I think they are useful for setting long-term goals but in the short-term they are counterproductive because reaching the artist's level of competency can take years and I would just burn out in the meanwhile.

Interesting textwalls. I read them all (not with complete attention, but I read them all.) While reading this a great poem came to mind. It was written long before our time by an entity called "chaddo of arto". It has the title "Jouney de artisé" and goes as follows: A cruel activity for those with doubt, a wonderful outlet for people without. How can you learn if you focus on others? That's a great question, let's talk with each other. You'll never shalt focus on a different mans work, unless it's to study the brush strokes he made. Only, once every full moon, it is allowed to compare them to you. Art is a struggle that's what people have told. But in truth that's only if it has to be sold. Otherwise, outside the realm of time you can only focus on what's thine. Because that's what it takes to become even better in creating the things that really do matter. Focus on learning and improving your craft, so failure becomes just another step on your path to ever greater heights. And whenever fear strikes, look it straight in the eyes and do the very thing it tried to restrict you from, that night. Let learning be your catalyst, then mastery will almost be missed the ver moment you've reached your goal, only to understand that there will always be more. This very thought for many daunting, is ones of the greatest joys of painting. So wield your brush like a majestic sword, and cut everything down between you and the Lord. Uhm... yeah. No idea where this came from. I just wanted to write a poem. It's a great way to explore a language. So back to the point of dealing with negative emotions in regards to drawing and painting. Understand that it's not always a given to be blessed with the ability to learn, to imagine things, to have arms to hold a pen, pencil or brush with. Just try your very best every time you sit down to study or create a finished piece. If you think it looks like shit, den figure out WHY. Be honest with yourself and you will understand what you need to do to resolve the issue. It might involve a year of work on a certain thing, but eventually you'll solve it. Fun fact, I was close to quitting art a few times. You know what made me different from the rest?

[Expand Post]

I didn't. Even during University when I was too drained to draw for over half a year, I always came back. Do you know why? Because I firmly believed that I will surpass all those people who quit, if I just stick to it. I don't have a dead line, there is no stress. Just the act of learing and enjoying your abilities to create something using your will of creation. You are a God who can make things become reality just by thinking about them. If you really want something, the pieces will start to adjust to your vision. You will start drawing and not quit. My positive mindset is my biggest asset. I just developed it a couple of yeats ago, but my progress skyrocketed because of that. The greatest catalyst is fun and lightheartedness. What else can I say. -t. artchad P.S. Do you know why I chose this name? Because I wanted to be an artchad. I wanted to become one. That's why I started to behave like one. Obviously I needed a certain amount of skill and creativity to be comfortable to dare calling myself that, but in the end I really started to feel like one, because I don't compare myself to others. I can enjoy there work, study their work, but then it goes straight back to developing myself and my unique abilities and visions of the world. P.P.S. I can only recommend people to move out of the city. Many people actually have close or distant relatives with land. It's just a matter of being a nice human to be around. I would even recommend it if youbare a scrawny little bitch boy. Tje physical work greatly increases your quality of life. I'm not really in the woods (although with manybwoods in the area), but compared to the babylonian metropolis I come from, it's basically back to the woods.

>>4479 Within the monochromatic blue tint of my room I behold a post bespoken of by a faggot, and come to a stunning realization: Prose is better than poetry. The focus on detail and ability to paint a picture properly through use of language no different than the layering of fine cremated pigment onto wood like camembert cheese is vastly superior to the final creation of an image within the heads of readers than the focus on word play and pointless attempts to harmonize the soul like a harpsicord ever will. I agree however, evading the smog and plumage of the overgrown sacrificial temple's of steel dedicated to Moloch is the only proper way of doing things but only once you can afford lordship under the system which is based around the extraction of capital in order to own worthy fertile land to live off of.

>>4492 I'm nout quite sure, but I think you've called me a faggot. The post was a nice read, although a comma here and there could help the reader to better grasp the structure of the text.

>>4492 Your purple prose is ass.

>>4492 >Prose is better than poetry. Well-written prose is nigh poetry; it's all in the rhythm. Also, if you are going to make such bold assertions, you would do well to have a strong grasp of punctuation.

YOU! Quick! Answer, don't ask, Christie's or Sotheby's? Just do it.

>>4519 You're a spic so obviously you belong working to your Scandinavian superiors, Sotheby's.

>>4519 You found a place willing to take your art pieces? Congratulations. You have greatly surpassed my expectations.

>>4520 Congratulations you're the only one who answered, you win, your reward will be knowing that if I fail or win at life it will be all thanks to you, let that bring you amusement.

Couldn't decide between this and the shitposting thread: Why the FRICK do I have to solve two captchas? Who thinks this is a good design? imho a captcha should function more like a "whitelist" and only be needed once until an ip gets banned (i.e. if someone gets a short ban for spamming they should have to solve a captcha again just to prove they're not operating under an automatic process). Unironically 4tranny-chan has a great captcha arrangement now where, while not my personal ideal, at least backs off after a few captchas are solved.

I ended up taking a break from drawing because of reasons. but I am starting again. Need to get in the habit.

I don't have any new art to show since the labor shortage has me working extended hours and has practically messed my drawing rhythm up. But I'd appreciate it if you all come visit my new board >>>/sig/

>>4583 Drawing is already the best way to improve yourself though. Of course money is everything but if you do not draw life will feel empty and you will have less will to make more money. Also is sig short for shrigma male? >sigma grindset rule #43534563465656434: kill random people

>>4578 join the inktober or weekly threads fren

I have to make a commitment and start posting on social media, I'm reluctant to do it though, even if I get in my own way. Anyway, is not as troublesome but posting to reassure me to do it. pic, is mainly about the body figure but as things are I did choose to draw a popular gacha

>>4612 CALL DA AMBERLAMPS

Just a single day away from art was enough to completely lose my footing. Looking at the stuff I've been doing recently I wonder if I haven't been regressing hard for the longest time and just didn't notice it because at least I've been very active.

>>4670 usually when I take a break feom art, my visual skillsndrop a lot more than my motor skills, which leads to me thinking things like "Hey, that's actually not that bad." or "Why did I think this was trash? This looks pretty good."

>>4670 >>4675 I think the stress of "drawing every day" gets pushed real hard on beginners and intermediates by a bunch of pros and old guys as a type of motivation without realizing what they're saying. It's a good idea to keep it a daily habit, I believe is what a pro would say - but don't stress out if you miss a day or two of drawing. If you feel like you "can't draw" because you missed a few days, just draw something simple and do some easy exercises like boxes in perspective to get back in shape.

How do you make friend with other artists? I want someone to draw with, but i don't want to sound like a kid asking for free comissions

>>4683 > How do you make friend with other artists? I want someone to draw with, but i don't want to sound like a kid asking for free comissions This site is already a good place to start. Drawpile helps you to get to know the people here. If you want to talk with people via voice chat...well...that's something else. I'm right now getting to work on my website, which I will spam all over the place. Then I'll make a peertube instance. Also I plan on streaming my process via some kind of JavaScript-free software, which I might have to write myself. Just give me a year and we can interact some more. lmao sorry

God I miss when my job was good brehs. Everything was so perfect just a few short years ago. If nothing else I'm certain the Pokemon card retard bullrun is winding down so I won't get a million card lards a day waddling in thinking buying a bunch of Pokemon shit is going to make a millionaire out of them, but I'll still have this ching chong security camera lurking over my shoulder at all hours a day, and a coworker who literally cannot stop talking long enough to get any work done. IT'S OVER

>>4800 While I sympathize, and don't mean to belittle your woes, it could be worse anon. You could be spending your days putting hotdogs in bread. Or cleaning up feces. It could all be so, so much worse. Once you've been at rock bottom for a while you gain a certain appreciation for not having to wear outfits designed to make you look inferior and washing your hands until they bleed, literally.

>>4801 Thanks anon, I know it could be worse, there's a reason I'm still working here after all. I've worked in food service (as a cook and a dish washer, I remember spending many days with red, raw hands) and in warehouses. Honestly I don't mind harder work at all-never felt oppressed by it-I'm just spoiled now and I'm butthurt I'm not even more spoiled. I'm just being a baby boo-boo nigga here because I rightly keep my entitlement to myself in real life. Only other artists would understand how great being able to draw at work would be even if it's a privilege they'd never enjoyed themselves, and subsequently how brutal having that ability taken away can be.

>>4800 Are you a 35 years old minimum wage worker at a small business? Many such cases

>>4363 NIGGER

>>4806 I'm a 35 year old wagie at a small business yes. I take home about $500 a week working 35 hours, like I said it's not so bad, the whole drawing at work thing has just been a privilege I can't help but lament losing because my circumstances at home are somehow even less ideal.

>>4808 "Clean it up wagie" tier jobs will always exist because to automate menial jobs is very expensive and only huge corps can afford them. Of course knowing how to program and work with hardwares will make the whole management process much easier but you still need wagies for the physical tasks. Operating a small business is very difficult and since you are in direct contact with your handful of wagies you will obviously try to squeeze out as much labor out of them as possible. All things considered it is actually surprising that your employer has not installed cameras earlier but then again looking through the footage even at 10x speed is exhausting and unsustainable. Personally I would never bother even glancing at the recording unless I suspect theft from one of the wagie because I am too lazy so I doubt your employer is constantly watching you like a hawk. You will probably be fine drawing at work as long as you and your coworker do the work well. Be sneaky obviously because there is nothing a business owner hates more than a wagie slacking off―a waste of money.

Came back from chopping and carrying wood as well as some other work. Currently eating chicken soup. It's incredibly tasty. The kitchen is super warm, because of the oven. I might be close to maxing out comfy levels in this moment. I'll draw the last 18 inktober submissions after I'm done eating. ehehehehe (They will be ultra high effort of course. ;p)

I am so fucking angry holy shit

>>4966 What's wrong my little pogchamp?

>>3408 I've been a complete mess for the last three weeks. I've been drawing everyday, and had a great session during my figure drawing today, but I feel a bit lost on how to practice a problem I have. I seem to have general issues with proportions, not purely in an anatomical sense, but in general. I've been doing live studies and that seems to help, but that doesn't resolve what I feel is a base issue I'm running into repeatedly where I just don't "see" how things relate to each other in space when drawing. I've practiced perspective and while definitely not a master, the problem that practicing perspective "solves" doesn't feel like the one I have. I think it's related to my issues with my handwriting too, where I've had horrible issues with consistent height and width of letters for years. Maybe it just boils down to "keep drawing faggot", but it's really eating away at me I don't quite understand what to practice and how. I don't expect overnight cures, I just "feel" an issue and I can barely articulate the problem let alone how to actually begin to solve it. I also have major issues "rendering"/"polishing" my art into something people want to look at as well, but I have a minor plan for that. I don't feel defeated, but I guess this might be called a "plateau"? I'm feeling that maybe.

>>4968 I am fine now. It went away after some intense exercise and a lot of sleep

>>4970 I hate that I want to honk that clown and see if her flower squirts.

>>4972 Based

Did someone in here say "loli"?

>>4974 You're hearing things, traveler. Perhaps I can offer you a fine Cheese Wheel in these trying times

>feel like I am shit at drawing >focus for like two miliseconds >get taken aback at what I am actually capable Remember, once in a while just try hard super fucking hard. You would be impressed at how good you actually are.

>>4976 Yeah, if it looks like shit, I usually just didn't care enough to make it look good. Although that's hampering progres... If one managed to try his very best on every piece, damn that would accelerate things. We have such incredibly high potential if we want. Just like I pumped out eighteen inktober submissions within four hours. Hahahahaha

>Someone's mistaking me for someone else >Decide to check it out >Guy on /ic/ participates in some big-ass drama >Posts his work >Happens to be a doodle from our drawpile >Part of one of my drawings is visible in a corner >People think I'm him because they don't know the context Fuck me, I can't take this shit. I've half a mind to dump my stuff there and ask for critique just to clarify that I'm not this retard stirring up flame wars so I won't have a legion of other halfwits associating my drawings with some pointless drama in a fucking porn thread. But obviously that'd only make things worse. I suppose basically brought this on myself, so maybe I don't have a right to complain. Hopefully nobody else gets similarly involved in something because of my idiotic decision to associate us more with that place. In that case I can only apologize.

>>4990 /ic/'s porn thread is full of some of the most rabid no-draw coomer arm-chair "art critics" on the entire website, most are probably just filthy immigrants from /co/ or /v/ going straight to the source instead of waiting around for a poor fool to fulfill an unpaid commission "request" elsewhere. These are the same kind of people who report our Drawpile invites on /co/ or /tg/'s drawthreads for "spamming", they are cripplingly mentally ill and not in the least worth engaging with. However, if you do feel the need to defend your honor and out the retard that's not a big problem either if you feel like it, I'm not sure what I'd do in that situation. As annoying as it is it won't likely cause any (real) issues. If you do say something just keep in mind that being too aggressively defensive often invites blowback because these subhumans have nothing but time on their bulbous hands and huge, easily bruised egos. Make no mistake that in either case you've done nothing wrong, you've helped bring new life and activity into the community, that's it. You have zero responsibility for the churlish antics of off-board coomers.

I have 6 figs in unrealized losses. My degenerately leveraged position is getting rekt. Rate.

I finally fixed that old Sony Vaio I installed Linux on. Harb would have been proud (at least if I'd had done it like 4+ months ago when I first started talking about it). I'll be bringing it to work tomorrow to mess around with in the back room, I already tested an Intuos 3 on it and it seems to work fine as far as I can tell.

>>5014 Good job

>>4990 >>4995 That's just the reality of things of putting your artwork on the internet. That's why I do not take it too seriously to begin with, and assume that sooner or later something I post will make rounds online without my involvement. Personally, I would not worry, and not bother with internet drama. Unless you are a major name, people in /ic/ will very quickly forget about your doodles, and this will have no lasting effect. From what I have seen, getting involved in internet slapfights only makes things worse, and is never worth it.

>>5015 I spoke too soon, I got it all set up but there's just no time, even a little sneaky drawing is better than none-but it's extremely close to being none even under ideal circumstances-and today it was none for all intents and purposes. It feels pointless really. I just have to hope I get a few days here and there where it's not the case, but today was super demoralizing. It was like my excitement for fixing the computer was thrown right back in my face.

>>5017 You have been complaining quite a lot about your job lately

>>5013 It could be worse anon. Money isn't everything.

>>5013 shoulda just bought GME fag

I was on a good art streak for months and even made some stuff I'm happy with but stuff happened that ruined my mood and I stopped for a bit. I'm getting back to drawan but, uh I forgot how to practice consistently....

>>5050 Holy shit I am laughing so fucking hard at this Thanks anon >>5051 GME chad... I kneel

>just busted out three drawings in three hours Holy fuck what a chore. I better win that damn contest.

I feel like a king right now. I have awesome food, don't need to work a lot and have a ton of spare time to boost the PPH of this board (from 0 to 1 LOL). I don't even feel bad to spend a few hours on the phone. ehehehehehe I started reading the holy bible and it's pretty interesting. I like how the action scenes are discribed in all their gorey details. Although I CAN'T STOP FEELING LIKE THERE'S SOMETHING i'm missing while reading it. Blogposting on image boards is so easy, that I don't even want to host a website for now. Soon I'll post two illustrations I've recently started. They are kind of weird as usual. I should probably start illustrating biblical scenes or my soul will be tormented in hell. I also tortured that mouse the other day by taking her by the tail and spinning her extremely quickly...shit that at least gives -100Karma for sure. Ok, here is a quick time event for the people who bothered to read through this. The first one to reply to this post with a reply containing the phrase "Modern anime is trash." will get some kind of art. You can add an abstract theme if you want. I will draw/paint what I want, so don't bother being too specific. I don't even care too much if anyone likes it. Here is the phrase of wisdom of the day: Speech and text are meant for sharing ideas. They are not meant to shape how you think. Try to think without words and only truth will be able to reply.

>>5056 Based and Chadpilled; lend us virgins your Chadly wisdom

My position is still safe thanks to my hedge but my unrealized losses is approaching 7 figs. I am only gambling with a percentage of my portfolio so the financial damage is minimal but the thought of losing $9.24 is too psychologically painful. I fell for the TA of some twitter faggot instead of sticking to my own battle-tested strategy and paid the price. I was too full of myself because I thought engineers can never lose at something made of numbers. I have no one to blame but myself and I will never make the same mistake again. >>5056 Modern anime is trash.

I had to close at 95% loss because of my computer's latest prediction. I was an idiot for trusting other people's analysis

Haven't posted in what feels like a long while. Not sure if I feel like blog posting too much, but the short of it is that things are good, or at least better than they were. I have more time for drawing, I have more time to spend with my family, I have a job that I actually enjoy for the most part. I thought that was all I really needed to feel good about life again, but I still feel bad most of the time. I seem to go through periods of being perfectly content, even joyful, and periods of being despondent and totally disinterested in things that used to capture my imagination. Is that normal? Is my brain all fucked up? Whenever I write something like this I feel like a whiny high schooler, so I'll move on. I'm starting to feel more confident with my abilities. I know I still have a lot to learn, but I got a pretty big ego boost from looking back at a couple studies I did earlier today. I realized how far I've come from drawing wavy noodle people. I'm sure that when I get around to posting them later, I'll receive some useful but sobering advice. Then I'll get back to the climb. On a related note, is too much experimenting a bad thing? I feel like my interests are all over the place, and I've been (briefly) trying a lot of different types of digital brushes and effects. But I can't help but think that I would be better off just picking a few things and sticking with them. Then later on I can branch out. >>5056 >I also tortured that mouse the other day by taking her by the tail and spinning her extremely quickly. Brutal

>>5069 > Whenever I write something like this I feel like a whiny high schooler, so I'll move on. Don't worry dude. We all have a whiny high schooler side as part of us. That's a fact. I'm wondering how many of the people who will read this statement are spiritually/mentally developed enough to understand that. > [...], but I got a pretty big ego boost from looking Watch out for that Ego part my friend. It's a double edged sword. > I'm sure that when I get around to posting them later, I'll receive some useful but sobering advice. I'm sure I will reply. > is too much experimenting a bad thing? So you're looking for absolutes? I guess you trust people on this board enough to lead you down a specific path with absolutes they'll give you. Alright, let me give you an absolute, within whichs illusion you can to further your artistic progress. Eventually you will have to stick to a worflow that achieves your expected results. Experimenting is invaluable for getting comfortable with a certain tool or new medium. I'd recommend every digital artist to start out using The Basic Round BrushTM. (I hope you know what that means.) You can also include an airbrush if you've seen that you're capable of rendering without. Don't use the air brush too much though.(With time you'll understand what's "too much". Same goes for the smudge tool. Learn to use them wisely.) This is a good base to start from. It's like the unofficial/occult fundamentals of digital painting. Just how you learn normalized human proportions, you'll learn sterile digital painting as a fundament to build your understanding on top of. (Textured brushes come later.) If you want to go a completely different way, that's up to you. I don't want to limit your divine capabilities of creating things not yet classified or publicly known. But I won't be able to aid you there as much. I'm just giving you a road map to my style of painting and a way to connect to your fellow artists on a technical level, because of the shared experience using this "traditional" way of painting digitally. If you feel like it, you can use a textured brush or some other special tool to create an illustration. It's important to be conscious of the tool you use. That means that you want to use a single brush/tool for the whole image and be very aware of cause and effekt. (What kind of movement, technique or whatever leads to which result.) Those images are practice illustrations/pieces. It will teach you the strengths and weaknesses of the tool. Where it's efficient to use and where it's cumbersome. Obviously you don't need to finish the illustration if you "get it" before. If you think you know the tool enough or have gotten the gist of it. But I recommend still finishing the illustration, because you can uncover tricks and techniques at the end. Then you can do an illustration using two or three brushes, using special purpose brushes for certain areas, applying filter, using layermasks or different arrangement of layers with alpha clipping or other modifiers. Add to that the sheer combinatorically vast number of possible brushes you can create with your brush engine, and you can quickly see how many styles of digital art you can produce. There is an innate style you have, which is based on your individual character, experiences, mental concepts, things you've learned and what kind of abstractions you use. It will show through in digital as it does in traditional drawing and painting. You can see what kind of teacher someone had by looking at their art. The teacher helped shape the students mind and style. The second factor that influences an artists style is his tool. But your innate style will show through the tool if your art piece is sufficiently complex. Don't worry or think about the first type of style. That one will naturlly develop as you learn. Trying to change your innate style will only breed sorrow and interfere with God working through you. That's why experienced artists tell their students to not worry about a style. They have one by virtue of being a human shaped by experiences and an individual core. It would be foolish to think ones speech limited mind would be capable of competing with God. You can try and see how it ends up. Spoiler: You will suffer or create something crippled. The point I'm trying to make is: Explore to your hearts content, focus on exploring individual ways of using the tools at your disposal one at a time and focus on the deeper principles of art just using your tools as the means of exploring that. Start at the "fundamentals", which are actually never mastered. What bitter-sweet pill to swallow >>5056 > >I also tortured that mouse the other day by taking her by the tail and spinning her extremely quickly. > Brutal Yeah, I feel bad for it. I don't judge Mao Zedong or Stalin, because I'm capable of the very same thing. If the time and circumstances would've been different, then I could've been one of them. But also a christ. :D It goes both ways.

>>3418 Checking in, still haven't done shit haha.

>>5060 You didn't give me a theme, so here you go:

>>5074 Thank you for the cool draw I thought you were going to ask for a theme before drawing lol. I was to ask for something that looks like this

>The simple act of drawing feels satisfying and not painful the past couple days >Today everything sucks and nothing turns out right Just one of those days, I suppose. There's always tomorrow. >>5071 Come on anon, take up the struggle. I can't promise it will be enjoyable, but if you stick with it, I bet it will be worth every ounce of sweat and tears. >>5074 That's quite pretty, now I kind of want a gondola tapestry hanging around somewhere in my house,

How would you feel about not showing your art to anyone? I'm still a beginner but I think my art will never be good enough to post it on social media lol.

>>5083 > How would you feel about not showing your art to anyone? Depends on why I make art in the first place. I make it to share my thoughts and connect with people. Not showing mu art would defeat the whole point. It doesn't matter how "good" or "bad" my art is, because it can always improve. I'm always thankful for harsh feedback if it comes from a sensible man. How do I feel about an artist, who don't share his work out of fear? I pity him. He will not be able to take advantage of other peoples points of view. Nor will he grow nearly as quickly as someone, who cheerfully shows his latest creations to others in the hopes of learning. You might regret showing certain art to the wrong people though. So be aware to whom you show your art.

Jehova our lord is watching over you my brethren. Thou shalt be viruous and just. Those that leave the narrow path to God for the indulgence in wordly thing, will suffer. That doesn not mean you can't enjoy things, but that you enjoy every moment to it's fullest and appreciate your life and do not throw it away chasing pleasue, because love and pleqsure are two very different thing. Pleasure comes from love, but please without love will lead to sorrow. Do not lust after your tulpa waifu, for she is not real.

You understood the essence of what you've read, even though I butchered some words on this digital phone keyboard.

I just realized that a lot of my art was satanic by nature. I drew for pleasure. Sometimes it was for a higher purpose, which gave me pleasure. I want to draw and paint with soul and love. Not for pleasure. Drawing for the sake of drawing is disgusting. I knew it back then, but didn't want to confront myself. If you draw for a higher purpose you will never be bored of art, as you won't be bored of speech when talking to another man. You will always have something to draw, because you could never possibly catch up with the vastness of your mind.

I also had the realization, that I'm pretty shit at art. My fundamentals are extremely lackluster. I'm pretty good at shitposting, but drawing beautiful things takes a lot of effort and discipline. I thought I was good at anatomy... now I realize how much more there is to learn. This will probably never end. That's just the nature of the endless struggle. But at least I can enjoy walkin. Enjoying the journey. The path is the goal and I've already reached, although I still keep walking forward. A master is relative to the one observing him. To many, Kim Joung Gi is a master. He himself sees other more skilled painters with the ability to capture more of the divine, and sees himself probably as a glorified stitposter. Just as I see myself now.

>>5089 >Drawing for the sake of drawing is disgusting. I think I understand what you mean, but this sentiment by itself seems wrong. A baby can only learn his mother's tongue by babbling just for the sake of making sounds. He has to train his mouth to form certain syllables, he has to learn and recall vocabulary, he has to be corrected constantly on grammar. If he only spoke up when he thought he had something important to say, then he would be constantly frustrated; he would never be able to find the right words and he would never be able to put them together in just the right way. He would fail to articulate his ideas as beautifully as he envisioned, if he were even understood at all. When we are learning to draw, we have to train our eyes and hands in a similar way. When we practice drawing for its own sake, we are building up our ability to communicate our vision. What's the use of drawing for a higher purpose if our results don't do it justice? That being said, I have met many people with mastery over English, and who, by all standards, should strive to only say things worth saying. However, there are some people who insist on talking so that they may hear the sound of their own voice. I would call them narcissists, and I think that's part of what you meant in your original comment. Perhaps we could amend the statement to: "Drawing for one's own ego is sin."

>>5086 convert to a .webm with ffmpeg and save bigly on filesize .webm related: [code]ffmpeg -i artchad.mp4 -c:v libvpx-vp9 -c:a libopus -b:v 1024k artchad.webm[\code] If I mess up my code tags again I'll look silly

>>5093 [code] test [/code] They aren't disabled entirely, are they?

>>5093 kek is that a christcuck book?

>>5086 Based and Chadpilled >Do not lust after your tulpa waifu, for she is not real. DAT WAS UNCALLED FO'! DAT WAS UNCALLED FO'!

>>5091 >>5089 That's funny considering most people on this board don't draw very meaningful things

>>5093 > ffmpeg -i artchad.mp4 -c:v libvpx-vp9 -c:a libopus -b:v 1024k artchad.webm Thanks a lot for saving me time. This little code snippet might be not very special, but it still means a lot to me, because I didn't find a good ffmpeg oneliner yet until now. >>5096 > kek is that a christchad book? Indeed, my friend. >>5097 > DAT WAS UNCALLED FO'! DAT WAS UNCALLED FO'! pic related. >>5099 > That's funny considering most people on this board don't draw very meaningful things Neither did I, but I want to start now. I'll post my two doodle-illustrations (highly rendered illustration baased on top of a doodle) and then I'll start to try my best to create meaningful art. I already thought of a way to circumvent the "no degeneracy clause" to allow me to draw explicit content, containing "immoral" sexual acts. Here is how the story goes: In a city, where a totalitairan Tyranny is reigning, we follow the life of a certain man. This man works as a butler for the Royalty and has the priviledge of being allowed to eat as much as he wants after his service for the day. But the royals don't know that he has a family in the city. It's forbidden to take food out of the palast for any butler. But how is he supposed to keep feeding his starving family? Escape is impossible, because of the incredibly strict control mechanism between sectors. So he saw no other way than to ejaculate in the his wifes and daughter stomaches on a daily basis as the means of nurturing them. But he couldn't do the same with his son, so the father also made sure to keep all furtile females in his family in a constantly impregnated state, so that the males would have sufficient amounts of milk to drink, in order to grow strong and powerful. The story end in the family becoming so big and influential that they manage to take down the ruling class of tyrants. END But then the question comes up. Why do I create art and tell stories through it? Is it just for escapism into another world, or is it to positively affect the real lifes of others. Did my degenerate mind just come up with this story to trick my brain into thinking that that kind of drawing is moral. Satan is after all the most intelligent and cunning of manipulators. The example above would probably only lead to arrousal and the proliferation of degeneracy. I want my art to have a real, positive impact on people. Again, the path of light is narrow. It's very very VERY easy to slip into degeneracy within the blink of an eye.

>>5091 It's as you said. It's hard to articulate your ideas, so that others understand it. Just as it seems that I wasn't careful enough with the words I chose to express my thoughts. > When we practice drawing for its own sake, we are building up our ability to communicate our vision. Do you see what you've just written? You draw for a higher purpose, because you want to learn to communicate better through your art. I'm right now struggling to express the very nuanced idea I wanted to convey. I see a child as a vessel of God - untainted and pure. That's where I want to go back to, with the only difference is that I would be more aware of what I'm doing. At least that's how I invision it. Your misunderstanding of my words was due to the several layers of information loss caused by language, as well as the fact that we don't see and feel each other in front of us. That means a lot emotion and energy behind certain words is lost. Why didn't Ted Caczinsky reach more people. This digital technology has gotten way out of hand. I just to want to live in a little village and have my peace. (I'm working towards that. I need to be patient.) > Perhaps we could amend the statement to: "Drawing for one's own ego is sin." That's a very good way to put it. Thanks for helping me express this more succinctly. Even so, someone who reads sucha statement without context will not understand it.

>>5099 what the damn is 'meaningful art'? more like meaningful FART haha owned

>>5102 DAAAAAAAAMN!

I'm so demoralized lol

This place needs to be life the rest of the internet and world is dead and most don't know or care about art as a whole they don't even do art. Fuck the comprising on our identities just for the sake of being in an active place they don't even care or want to participate in the conversation or the community.

>>5175 YEAH

>>5175 what?

>>5177 I wasn't sure either I was just trying to be supportive

>>5177 This is the only and last place on earth for the hopes of having an art board most on the internet are shitty this one still has hope

>>5177 This is the only and last place on earth for the hopes of having an art board most on the internet are shitty this one still has hope