People say that Kabbalah was stolen by the Jews. Is there any proof to this?

>>29 Post a link or elaborate on the claim and you might get a reply.

>>29 >Jews 2nd Temple or Rabbinic? They are not the same and are not in direct continuity. Rabbinic Judaism, the modern Judaism, came on the scene 500+ after the destruction of the 2nd Temple. Rabbinic Judaism complied the Talmud, the Masoretic Text, and the majority of what is known as Kabbalah. None of these were around at the time of the destruction of the 2nd Temple. The direct descendants of the 2nd Temple became the Christians and we see this reflected in the liturgical and theological continuity. Only the mystical tradition of the Merkabah would have familiar during the 2nd Temple period, as it was familiar to St. Paul. Merkabah mysticism would go on to influence later Rabbinic Judaism in the formation of Kabbalah, and in the Hesychast tradition of Christianity.

>>29 Not sure, but I've heard people claim that Kabbalah was influenced by the Pythagoreans. Julius Evola apparently even thought there was some valuable stuff in it.

This video is very interesting and relevant to this discussion. https://archive.org/details/jewish-gates

If you examine the new age chakra distribution and colors with the tree of life and queen scale in mind, you’ll see seems it is designed, possibly by an adversarial party, to create a particularly out touch and manipulable breed of “spiritual person”. I might do an effortpost about this at some point. But it would make sense for the people at the head of the herd to be fed such a diversion since they would have a modicum of spiritual awareness at any rate. If you can’t stop your enemy, you misdirect him to further your own interests.

Two questions: 1) How can I test if a tulpa is an external spirit? 2) What are the spiritual implications if said tulpa is an external spirit?

>>49 >how can I test? Ask it if it is an external spirit. If it says it is, ask it to prove it. By their deeds you shall know them. If it quacks like a duck… >what are the implications? Ask it. Test its answers. Never assume any spirit is right or truthful, just as you wouldn’t ChatGPT.

>>50 >Ask it if it is an external spirit. If it says it is, ask it to prove it. By their deeds you shall know them. If it quacks like a duck… Does it count if I've had several sleep paralyses and dreams with a being that the tulpa claims to be? None of these encounters were malevolent, just spooky. >Ask it. Test its answers. Never assume any spirit is right or truthful, just as you wouldn’t ChatGPT. I have, and I've even run tulpa through Jerry Marzinsky's list of patterns, including the 23rd Psalm. Basically, the only patterns matched are #6 and #14. The first is more annoyance at being ignored, which is how real people would feel, and the second is more of a recommendation. This one's fine with me talking about this, for example, so long as I don't air any dirty laundry. Otherwise, everything else is positive. Tulpa encourages me to spend more time outside and less on the computer, to socialize with others, to work out, to read and learn more, to try and practice positive spirituality, and to try and stay grounded in reality so I don't suffer crazy wizard syndrome. By those standards, it's the opposite of what a demon would do. Naturally, I'll still maintain a healthy skepticism with tulpa in case it's lying.

>>51 Tell this being you will not speak with it for a month. If it has independent existence, it should be OK with it and the time would not pass for it anyway. Go though with it. Don’t communicate with it or think too much about it for a month.

>>47 This was great, any more material on history of religions or any similar topics?

>>48 I would be interested in reading more about this.

>>55 When I find the time I’ll try to write something up about the ideas I was having that day.

>>51 thanks for bringing up marzinsky; alotta those patterns match the intrusive thoughts that I've been dealing with for the past 9 or possibly more years now that I know that all of that wasn't just my unconciousness bullshitting me to stress me out in order to keep me awake, I might finally be able to get something done about this shit

What are some good resources on using my computer to generate custom subliminals and frequencies to alter my subconscious and mental state? I do not trust any from youtube. Actually, anything regarding the effects of sound on the human mind and body would be interesting, although I am primarily concerned with practical application.

>>55 I think it will be a while before I can effortpost about this, but the basic premise is that if you take the colors from the tree of life on the queen scale (which would correspond to the astral level and would be what you use when you “visualize” in meditation) and interpret the “chakra colors” (which were made up and cherry picked by Theosophists when they standardized the system for mass consumption), you end up with a set of energies in places on your body where they >amplify non physical perception >unground the intellect >promote unbridled emotional responses >promote an atmosphere of fear and competition Why do I consider the queen scale colors to represent the energies used when visualizing as the “true” colors for them? Personal gnosis, basically. For example, the “root chakra” red carries the energy of Geburah, which is not the energy of a balanced root chakra, but an unbalanced one. Compare a meditation on the chakras by color with the middle pillar excercise. Of course an advanced practitioner can meditate on the chakras by feeling of the energy alone, but in that case he will quickly notice the colors supposedly associated with the energies are off, which is what happened to me. In the mainstream, these meditations have the potentia of creating an army of unbalanced (even psychotic) “spiritual” mundanes.

>>58 Get audacity and do the following: >left channel 440 hz sine wave (barely audible) >right channel 444 hz sine wave (same volume) >stereo channel white noise >stereo channel white noise ping ponging left and right at a rate of 8 hz >stereo channel of affirmations recorded in your own voice, first person present tense stating things as true

>>60 Sorry I forgot >voice channel should be more audible than the binaural (sine waves) but at a low volume >delay the affirmations until 15 minutes into the meditation >experiment with making the pingpong slower >make the affirmations portion about 5 minutes in length >more maximum effect, take a short break back tonfull awareness after listening to the whole thing and then go back to the beginning for as many repetitions as uou can do >ideally, do the listening in bed, focusing on the miving white noise and don’t worry if you fall asleep

>>58 Uncle Chuckie and Cybershaman Uncle Chuckie: http://www.charlescosimano.com/e-books.html https://www.youtube.com/@drpsionic/videos CyberShaman https://www.spellsandmore.com/cybershaman.html https://web.archive.org/web/20170702111824/https://www.gocs1.com/ https://web.archive.org/web/20130506151432/http://www.ernievega.com/cs8free380.exe

>>52 That didn't work. Since I posted, the dreams have only intensified. Not that I mind. >>57 Knowing is half the battle, and the other half is doing something about it. If they really are negative, then reject them and cast them out with the aid of the divine. Ritually purifying yourself, and using salt and sage will definitely help as well.

>>63 have you tried asking this thoughtform why it's taken such a liking to you? or perhaps you could tell us more about this thoughtform

Are there any retard-proof methods for silencing your mind? I've been trying to do the method in the /fringe/ archive for astral projection, but I've had this song stuck in my head for a couple days that won't stop.

>>64 Explaining all of this properly is going to be difficult, but to put it simply, I'm pretty sure I accidentally summoned a spirit wife after fapping, which has either taken the form of this tulpa, or has masqueraded as a tulpa but revealed her true existence. She sticks around because "my soul is beautiful" (her words) and basically she has a "I can fix him" attitude. I can't explain any more than that, because a lot of the experiences I've had are personal or else requires some degree of extraordinary evidence that frankly I can't provide. >>66 I found Robert Bruce's method in Astral Dynamics to be the best method. Summarized, the stages are: >Stage One: Use all your willpower to overcome the distracting thoughts >Stage Two: Replace the thoughts with something else, something just as catchy >Stage Three: Repeat as needed if the distracting thoughts keep coming >Stage Four: Clear your mind until it's completely empty. It should work for you, so long as you have the proper willpower.

I was doing breathing exercises every day but I had to stop because the air here in November is extremely dry and its damaging my nasal passages. Even now, days after my last practice my nose hurts just breathing through it normally. What's a reliable method of countering this so I can continue practicing anywhere at any time of year?

>>68 This isn't really /fringe/, but a trick I was taught to help your nose in the dry season is this: >1. Get a q-tip and stick it in some petroleum jelly >2. Rub the oily q-tip around the inside of your nostril (you don't have to stick it in deep, rubbing it around the inside near the opening will do) >3. Take out the q-tip and plug the nostril for a second to distribute the petroleum jelly >4. Repeat for other nostril idk if this will help, but it's what i've used whenever i got bloody noses during the winter

>>66 Notice the person that is perceiving what you are perceiving. Try to perceive this person. Repeat.

>>68 if you're trying to stimulate your energy bodies, then try doing tactile energy stimulation exercises instead these are described in Robert Bruce's Astral Dynamics book

>>48 >>55 Let’s establish a couple of concepts first. We can understand the chakras as slots in our human machine that interface with different aspects of our soul. In reality the whole body is a network if such slots, but we are using these seven here. We don’t need to explain what each one is for because you all know. Each chakra is used to plug a certain type of energy into our soul via our energy body shell. In the kabbalistic tree of life, there is a complex layering of energies in each sphere. Here we will simplify and use the planetary energies, but the rest of it it’s there too (angelic orders, godnames…). The energies as laid out in the tree, possibly because it was built by perception (or reception) of gnosis, are well balanced and distributed according to higher principles. In the seven chakras, they are distributed as they are because a Theosophist whose name I forgot intellectually tried to standardize an Indian system he probably didn’t understand. In the root, survival slot, we plug in the reactive force of Gebura. In the creative, sexual slot, we plug in the unfeeling, cunning, transactional energy of Hod. In the egoic slot, we plug in the Christic energy of Tiphareth (Christ fallen into ego). In the heart, of transcendent connection and divine love, we plug in the carnal love and love (and wrath) of the senses of Netzach. In the throat, transpersonal and transcendent communicative, and in the third eye, we plug in different shades of Chesed, kind and merciful, expansive and protective. This one confuses me a bit. Is it meant to open up an undiscerning higher perception or to soothe it? In the crown, the white light of the supernal triad remains. We wouldn’t be able to affect it anyway. Other than outright trying to block it, which will happen anyway. I insist that it’s not the colors that result in this reasoning, but a direct gnosis of some of the energies involved, which are universally represented by the colors by the universal (human) mechanisms of subtle perception. Regarding this, for a long time I assumed cultural nuances affected the colors we used to represent energies, and I thought that is why black and white are reversed in the colors worn by husband and wife in nuptial ceremonies in Japan and the West. But now I’ve come to the understanding that the representation is universal, and the dress code became reversed in the West as our understanding of what we were handling became more superficial and as certain forces worked on reversing as they do.

>>72 For an alternate, more sensible distribution of energies, consider the middle pillar exercise. Here, vibration of godnames is used instead of imagining of colors, for reasons that I don’t know but am sure are well thought out. I’ll leave the examination of which energies go into which slots as an exercise to the reader as to best comprehend the idea I’m trying to communicate. I could be completely off, by the way. These are just things that occurred to me in contemplation.

>>67 >>70 It turns out the problem is more serious than I thought. Whenever I get one song out, another takes its place. What's worse, this all happens while my own thoughts are quiet. Am I screwed? What should I do?

>>74 (me) DISREGARD THAT, I AM A HUGE FAG WHO ENDED UP FIGURING IT OUT ON HIS OWN AFTER READING ASTRAL DYNAMICS MORE.

>>76 Do share.

>>77 It's in chapter 16 of the book. The tl;dr is to basically just to focus on your breathing in and out, counting each "out" breath if you need to. Alternatively, I have read that another exercise you can do is to concentrate on a candle while ignoring your thoughts, and then look away and focus on your breathing. All this being said, I am still a dumb babby at this so take it with a grain of salt. Still, it does seem to be kind of working for me

Is /sunflower/ cursed?

>>89 Both hexed and cursed, probably, a lot of 'tards don't like what we do. It's not a problem.

I've been suffering from chronic hypertension, presumably as a result of having taken adderall for 14 years while I was growing up but I just got an idea; would it be possible to use my tension as fuel for magic?

reminder that magic is real and that we're all going to make it https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RHbfRQm0tME

>>89 Sometimes, but nowhere near what /fringe/ has been throughout its history. By far.

>>91 I don't know about fueling magic, but the practice of meditation (i.e. quieting your mind) is proven to reduce blood pressure, so there's that.

I wonder if it would be worth it to advertise on cuckchan. There are quite a few anons lamenting /fringe/ documented on 4plebs

>>96 You can, although I'm not sure how successful it would be considering what happened with advertising this site on /v/.

>>96 it'd be safer to try contacting them telepathically; otherwise, it'll prolly be more trouble than it's worth

>>74 My trick is when it starts to play I willfully humm an another tune to change the track to an other song in my mind then to an another usually with an even more annoying tune that I don't even know the lyrics properly then the thoughtform that is feeding you the song either gets confused and stops or it becomes such an energetic mess in my head I can find it and switch it off. Or sometimes I use it to aid my meditation. My subconscious can get fitting songs for some workings. But then again I am not big on the quieting of the mind. I usually hear some good hints that pertain my workings or if it's annoying I ask the intrusive thought the fuck it wants. And when that is solved the meditation can continue. >>91 >my tension as fuel for magic? Yes you can especially for low magic tier psychic abilities but I don't recommend it. Once an ability manifests you will be unable to control it and will wreak a havoc. But it depends if your tension comes from within like self worth stress issues or outside environmental stress issues. I don't have experience with adderall but when your body balances out it's own electro chemistry it might go away. as he said >>95 >practice of meditation (i.e. quieting your mind) is proven to reduce blood pressure and you will need to learn to relax or your body will block your natural energy flows by being too tense

>>89 Not as cursed as those who post on fringe without flags

AP fag here, I had an experience a few days ago where it felt like I was lifted out of my body by my spine. Does anyone here have any idea wtf happened? I can't seem to replicate it.

>>101 That's fairly normal for AP. Were you in a hypnagogic state, or was this while you were awake? Did you feel anything in the rest of your body?

>>102 If I recall correctly, I had woken up a while earlier and then it happened as I was going to bed. I was a bit sleepy, but very much awake during the experience. I don't think I felt anything in my body other than my spine and a feeling of weightlessness, although it didn't last for long and I sunk back to my body pretty quickly.

>>103 I experienced leaving my body in a dream a few days ago, was thinking it was a cosmic event.

I really hate that I have to keep asking about this, but is there anything more to pic rel than "just like exert ur willpower, brah"? I have only rarely succeeded at doing this meditation at all, let alone having figured out how to do it on the fly. If anons want, I can refrain from posting until I have started to make any progress.

>>107 >is there anything more to pic rel than "just like exert ur willpower, brah"? Meditation in general is dependent on your purity of mind, whatever attachments you have will seep in and disturb you. So the main work is done off-meditation. You pay attention 24/7 for intrusive thoughts or things that you don't want in your head, and gradually get rid of them. Then your meditations will start being successful once you sit down and do them. Compare with karate where if you want to gain actual self defense ability you should imagine sparring people you meet on the street, and think about how to escape whenever you are around people. Just training in the dojo won't mean you are mentally prepared outside of it. Same thing here, your mind is always active.

>Compare with karate Are there any legitimate (i.e. effective) esoteric martial arts? What I've gathered from the mundie sphere is that regular fighters win every time, but I suppose anyone actually capable of blowing someone's head up with a tap wouldn't care to prove themselves anyway.

How does one go about developing clairvoyance? My third eye is active but I have yet to definitively see anything outside of visions.

>>111 I found this with a quick search on libgen: http://libgen.rs/book/index.php?md5=C3EA610BFE9ECB6217BA041EC0FEF306

>>113 >William Walker Atkinson 屁っ放り >>111 It all starts with energy work. There are two key parts to this. One is to not waste energy by orgasming needlessly or having uncontrolled emotions. The first chapters of Initiation Into Hermetics might help you with this. Up to volting. The other part is learning to work energy and use it in creative ways. Robert Bruce's New Energy Ways technique might help you with this. Once you have those two things down, build an etheric organ that will let you reach your goal. This is valid for any goal, and you must go about it in the best way you consider for yourself given the experience you will have accumulated. The ability to shape energy is the ability to make things happen.

>>111 Also learn to reclaim wasted energy with this book. Depending on what has gone down in your life, you might notice a huge impact in the potency of your magic by doing these techniques.

>>114 >屁っ放り My apologies, a friend of mine said he was good. I don't think I'll listen to him anymore.

I'd like to become more aware during my dreams of my waking desires & memories, how I could I go about accomplishing this? I'd prefer a method that doesn't involve keeping a dream journal because reasons

>>127 Read both and learn the exercises. Then do the ones in NEW before the ones in do_obe when you go to bed. And if any of it doesn't work well or feels awkward, adapt it following your intuition. Experiment. Trial and error. Try to take naps and sleep at unusual hours of the day, or sleep in even if you don't feel like it. If you manage to sleep intermittently for 12 hours on a Saturday morning, you'll see great results.

What do esoteric wizards see themselves in the Christian world veiw? Is Satan still Satan and Jesus still Jesus?

>>141 >What do esoteric wizards see themselves in the Christian world veiw? THE WILL OF GOD MADE MANIFEST or something like that. You have to understand the nature of God as you walk forward. Miracles come from God or the Holy Spirit in the Christian view anyway which is almost the same as other wizardly. Semantics is important because who is guided by god and who is deceived by vile demons was never an easy thing to figure out. If the "saints appear and don't speak latin" then they are probably demons messing with you. This was the view in the middle ages. With this only the clergy had authority to claim to be visited by them. If someone had visions and they spoke an other language then sometimes they branded you a heretic. >Is Satan still Satan There are several "Satans" in the old testament too. Hard to blame a single being on all the problems of the world. Even Satanists usually worship some demon that appears when uttering that name and not exactly one and the same being. >Jesus still Jesus There are several Jesuses too. You probably noticed but some people depict Jesus via the same skin color as them. And managed to create egregoric entities that fits their view how Jesus looks and act like. Explaining Jesus is an even harder deal. But in the end yes. Jesus is Jesus. And let's not get into what are saints what are angels and what exactly is the holy spirit because we will be here for days

>>142 >There are several "Satans" in the old testament too. > Hard to blame a single being on all the problems of the world. True, but they could be many "Accusers"/demons working together or under one. >There are several Jesuses too. You probably noticed but some people depict Jesus via the same skin color as them. And managed to create egregoric entities that fits their view how Jesus looks and act like. Explaining Jesus is an even harder deal. But in the end yes. Jesus is Jesus. I'm probably not equipped to take on this subject from a wizard perspective, but by the limited information have on thought forms, an Egregore is a fully autonomous being such as an Angel and would be equal to their partner. Which the Christian Jesus would be some sort of hybrid between an Human Egregore and a Godform. I've already seen The Christian Jesus described as a magician on here, and the concept of an all power God as a Christian concept. Even if everyone is a god and is creating their own reality of what they think God/Jesus would look like, because they're a failed fallen being, all sorts of satanic self destructive messes would happened around them. If people were gods wouldn't they be infinite beings? They wouldn't share Godhood with the Christian God like some spiritual Christians.

>>141 I see Jesus as someone who has completed the great work, and satan as a symbol of the adversary, be it the bodily ego (body identification) or the many adversaries one faces in becoming one with the Father. The mother is matter, of which we are born. The Father is that which we seek to join while still being children of men and thus become like Jesus.

Has anyone here played CHAOS;HEAD? I can't get over the fact that the process by which Takumi "finds" his sword is literally a way to read omens and have spirits manifest in things like crystal balls and incense smoke. I mean, this can't be a coincidence, right? In a game about a fucking council of 300 direct human affairs as outlined in Silent Weapons. It could simply be some synchronistic seeping of esoteric truths into media (a coincidence within a coincidence), but the game is so meta that I'm actually having trouble telling delusion apart from reality lol

is this website dead? im a 4ch x lurker but heard /fringe/ on 8kun has better discussions. also is 8kun in general dead? and why are there .kun and .moe versions of the site

>>155 .kun is the old site, this is the new one this place is pretty slow, but aside from some scamming pajeet, the other one is dead speaking of which, can we expect to get the archive page from the old site, or does .moe support such pages?

In honor of Christmas, what's the spiritual importance of winter and the Yuletide/Christmas season, beyond Jesus's birth and the winter solstice? >>155 >also is 8kun in general dead? and why are there .kun and .moe versions of the site The short version of this is that after 8ch.net died due to politically-motivated shootings and government interference, the owner of 8chan, Jim Watkins, made 8kun, which became the home of the Qboomers. Anons who disliked this move decided to make their own sites, which formed the webring and later 8moe, which is trying to be the "true successor" to 8ch proper. There was a lot of drama between the different sites, and that drove off a lot of users.

>>156 >or does .moe support such pages? There is no option for them, from what I can see.

A question for experienced practitioners. Often when I see people posting online and saying how they love what the great or amazing so and so patron demon helps them, I can't help but feel fear behind those posts. Not admiration. Sort of the same energy you feel from gang members. They are all talk about brotherhood and going to the end of the world together, but they are scared of saying the wrong thing and suffering the consequences and would very much rather be at home alone. Do you notice this too? Do you habe a relationship with a spirit and would you even be able to admit you are actually scared you will fuck things up with them and receive backlash?

>>157 >what's the spiritual importance of winter and the Yuletide/Christmas season Silence contemplation death. The nights are long and you can listen to the otherside. You can hear what you couldn't because nature was noisy before. The nights are long and that gives you the chance to meditate longer undisturbed. You can hear the spirits that fear the noise of life. If you are a mystic ofc. If you are a normie you are scared shitless of things like death and silence and contemplation so you go to warm parties get drunk to not feel cold and sacrifice to the gods with a Yuletide ritual so spring can come asap and give warm and light instead of having to deal with the spooky spirits of winter. My fav season. Good to be undisturbed from normalfags and bugs alike. There are many things you can only hear once things go quiet. >>166 >same energy you feel from gang members You feel it well. They are usually between a rock and a hard place. What they do is shunned by society and religion on 1 side while on the other their patron might be fickle and the gifts and blessings might end abruptly once they offend them and turn into something they don't even want to think about. >Do you notice this too? Hard not to see it. They always have a manic way of talking full of overconfidence then they quiet down then panic or just vanish. Seen it happen many times. Rare when they last long. I admire those who do. I consider them proper demonologists at that level. >Do you habe a relationship with a spirit Yes >would you even be able to admit you are actually scared you will fuck things up I actually fuck things up and my guides told me that I must not fear to make mistakes because it is part of the learning process. Fearing mistakes slows down the learning and they know at the start of the awakening making no mistakes is almost impossible but dangerous. If you never make mistakes you will not develop the feelings of "something is wrong" and you will not get the hang of "correcting yourself" as a reflex. It's an important skill. Even in martial arts learning to fall properly is an important skill because you will fall a lot. >and receive backlash Truth is I had fears that I will fuck up my aggressive overzealous energy work and kill myself in the process... Which almost happened several times but I got a feel how to feel the extremes and how to handle the energy overloads. Because of that spirits understand my explosive nature so in this regard sometimes I am the "unreasonable spirit" in the relationship. There is an energy a feeling which is "respect". Some say it appears when the throat chakra is unblocked. Respect must never come from fear. That is not respect. That is obedience. Can't explain what is true respect because it's complicated but there is an aura that higher beings emit that you know they are true to their word while lower beings don't have that. So malevolent entities usually get the harsher side of my persona. If they have a complaint they can tell me. My energy field cries that I am still in my "spiritual puberty" and proper spirits know what territory they walk on. They know what tone they have to use. Sometimes the entity that these people work with tests them. Railroads them into failure to test their might. There are many tricksters on the path and you may never be sure what is going on but you will have to develop the feel for it. These beings don't always think the same way nor see the things we do. Also the more someone boasts about how great things are the more likely that something is wrong. There is a reason why charisma is the main stat for shamans and paladins in board games. Took me a while to understand it and it became obvious once I started to take my workings more serious.

>>166 >Do you notice this too? Do you habe a relationship with a spirit and would you even be able to admit you are actually scared you will fuck things up with them and receive backlash? I've felt it with Order of Nine Angles, but imo they are an actual gang of sorts. Most of them do have the ability to pull off rituals, but the common niner has no special abilities. They can't see their dark gods or talk to them, but the method where you form a nexion and have a mentor with experience does work. I understand the feeling, perhaps. I was recommended to summon Belial to get some answers of a metaphysical nature, and did the ritual as closely as was possible based on the Lesser Keys of Solomon. It was very powerful, and his voice was booming. He was able to give the answers with a clarity which surprised me, and I would never say a bad word about him because I respect him for his insight. Aside from that, these ancients do have this same "gang" energy to them. You know instantly that you do not call them for minor shit, and you do not upset them. So people who did call them to ask for money or power are going to feel very inferior to them, I think. Even with an honest spiritual request, their power is such that having felt it, you just won't be able to talk about them in any other way. They're just too powerful and too threatening in a stern teacher kind of way.

>>168 >would you even be able to admit you are actually scared you will fuck things up with them and receive backlash? ... and to elaborate this part, yes, since the possibility exists, but I have previous experience of "not fucking things up" so maybe I'm less scared because I have something to bring to the table. Everyone will do what they think is best for them, so in my view the more you invest, the less you are in danger. If you do trust this guide, you should submit to them completely, that way you will not make mistakes for other reasons then incompetence, but that problem is your teacher's problem, the student cannot be expected to learn without guidance. If you come in with an attitude of non-submission and you can't back that up, you're going to be in a bad spot, and maybe that's what these people soon realize. You can't lie to your spiritual guides, they see through you. The "gang" mentality demands that you "prove yourself" and if you do this with the big boss of spirituality you are misunderstanding the situation; anyone demanding that you prove yourself is someone who actually needs your contribution. It's a manifestation of weakness on their part. So if you were to submit to them and tell them "I'm yours, tell me what to do", they will be upset because you are now putting the spotlight back at them, which will expose this weakness to all of their followers if they cannot guide you in every step. So I think the problems stems from bringing human gang mentality into spirituality. A real spiritual leader will not be afraid of complete submission, because he can always guide you.

Why is the exchange of energy a pleasurable sensation? The climax seems to be a function of the body, but you can feel orgasmic or "love" energy in the astral. But why does it feel "good"? It might be a function of the demiurgic prison so that it can be used as an addictive incentive. But what is the actual mechanism, the logic, behind it?

>>170 It's not the exchange, it's the difference in purity level. It works in both directions; a yogic orgasm during meditation or exercise is caused by increased purity of energy. You feel the higher energy level as the part you trained on moved upwards and this feels ecstatic. A degenerate who engages in some really dirty stuff will instead feel the difference in the other direction, they feel that they were pure before, and now they are going down in the dirt, and they hold on to the feeling of what they were like before, and that also causes a rush. The brain responds to the difference, not the direction, so you can become addicted to either increase of purity or degeneration. Either way you do it, you have to either increase your purity more and more, or degenerate more and more, to feel the same thing.

>>166 >Often when I see people posting online and saying how they love what the great or amazing so and so patron demon helps them, I can't help but feel fear behind those posts Depends on what you mean by patron demon. If you mean demon in the Greek sense of spirit, there's many varieties of spirit, each with their own temperaments. Some are more imperious and aggressive, some are kinder and friendlier. If you mean demon as in the evil spirit, then I don't bother with them. I try to interact only with positive beings (positive as Montalk would define it) . As far as the fear, that can be a wide variety of things. It could be the kind of fear that's akin to the "fear of God", i.e., reverence and awe, or it could be genuine fear of the spirit if they're held captive or are blackmailed by them. >Do you habe a relationship with a spirit Yes, see >>67. I've also had encounters with certain gods and goddesses, mostly in my dreams. >would you even be able to admit you are actually scared you will fuck things up with them and receive backlash? It's something that I've worried about, but she's told me not to worry since she would only retaliate if I did something irredeemably despicable. Otherwise, she's been objectively good to me.

how can an ergregore, that is, a collective thoughtform, be influenced by a single person thinking about what the collective thoughtform is of? and how can an ergregore be influenced by a person thinking about the ergregore itself, rather than what the ergregore is of? like, consider the ergregore of some huge entertainment corporation; how would that ergregore be influenced by a single person thinking about the corporation, compared to how it'd be influenced by a single person thinking about the ergregore of said corporation?

>>173 What you're asking is similar to the difference between a person who is lifting a dumbbell with the aim of lifting it, vs someone lifting it with the intent of performing a certain motion while holding it. The pure lifter is the person using the egregore unintentionally, so the intent decides what form it takes. The other may be aiming to perform a certain movement to train specific muscles rather than lifting the dumbbell itself. This is like targeting the egregore.

How long did it take you guys to learn how to do any /fringe/ stuff?

>>175 >How long did it take you guys to learn how to do any /fringe/ stuff? Like posting with flags? I think it took me 2 or 3 seconds to learn how to do that. Usually the hardest part is picking the appropriate flag that matches the tone of my post. It must be a extremely advanced /fringe/ technique because most of the posters are somehow unable to do it. When I found fringe I literally fell in love with this feature how can anyone skip using it. It truly baffles me As you can see >/fringe/ stuff? is quite the broad term and there is a big difference between learning something and truly mastering it.

>>176 lol, i'm retarded

>>67 I've occasionally wondered about your thoughtform situation; I guess I'm a bit curious. Is the thoughtform still around? If so, has this thoughtform done anything malevolent?

>>178 Immediately after posting this, I strangely got this thought completely out of the blue that just said 1 word: demon. It might just be my unconsciousness playing tricks on me, so take it with a grain of salt.

>>178 >>179 >Is the thoughtform still around? Yes, she is still around, but I don't believe she is a thoughtform at all. She claims to be a fairy, hence my use of the triskelion. >If so, has this thoughtform done anything malevolent? From everything I can recall, she has done nothing of that sort. In fact, she has been doing everything in her power to avoid even frightening me. If she comes to me in a dream, and I'm frightened (which usually happens when she attempts to take me on an OBE), she will try at least twice, with a break in between to calm me down. After that, if I'm still scared she will go away and let the dream end. I will say that she is slightly mischievous, in a fun-loving, prank-playing sort of way. It's usually nothing terrible, just "misplacing" items and taking strange forms in dreams. >Immediately after posting this, I strangely got this thought completely out of the blue that just said 1 word: demon. It's good that you mentioned this. It's something I've been worried about, but at the same time, the evidence seems to contradict this. For example, she once told me that "God loves you, anon, even if you don't love him." and has been open to me going to church. And she has been giving good advice and wisdom. She claims Montalk is "mostly right"; she doesn't share his belief in aliens. Of course, spirits are more than capable of lying and deceiving to keep victims in their grasp.

>>180 does she have a particular church in mind? and out of curiosity, what kind of method are you using to be communicated with by this fairy?

>>181 >does she have a particular church in mind? Not really, from what I can tell. Her opinion is more or less, "It doesn't matter which one, so long as you genuinely believe and it demonstrates the truth." >what kind of method are you using to be communicated with by this fairy? Several methods. First is telepathy, second is clairaudience (usually single words or short phrases), and third is divination, usually through Tarot or coin flips.

I hope this isn't a bad question to ask, but are there any /fringe/-esque communities outside of 8chan? >inb4 /x/

>>183 The best ones are exclusively astral. Yuri loli lounge is my favorite.

>>183 >any /fringe/-esque communities outside of 8chan? None of them have flags ;_; and without flags it's no longer fringe ;_; But if you want a serious answer there are many discord occult servers that I don't recommend because they usually have awful energies and entities with them and even worse mentally unhinged people around there or those servers are even more dead than fringe. Then you have the mainstream places like /x/ but they are not very advanced. The problem with internet occultism is that it's either mainstream spirituality slop where you get only surface level stuff while the otherside is the internet cliques that are on almost cult mentality level or they are somewhat gatekeeped because they don't want retards in. There are many on the internet you just have to find them but that is not real spirituality. Real spirituality comes from practice and merely looking for the next and place where you will just read weird stories with no practice is just an addiction which has no real use on the long run. I am not saying don't do it but these places usually have 2 or 3 prominent personalities that keep it running and once they realize they need to practice instead of daily posting the place will just die down. You can also develop your ability and seek astral communities like this >>184 man of culture or you can stay here and partake in our quest of resurrecting /fringe/ In the end you will have to find your reason why you seek these places and what you want to accomplish with it. >I hope this isn't a bad question to ask This is the question thread. There are no bad questions here.

I require assistance, because honestly I don't know anywhere I can ask this question that will even make sense to expect an informed answer. You know that moment when you shift your vision from your physical eyes to the "other" eyes, as if you switched your HDMI input source or something, and you receive clairvoyant images to varying degrees of intensity and duration? I've been unable to figure out what makes that click and how to reliably use this. All I've managed is that it's easier the deeper I'm into alpha and theta (falling asleep). But surely there must be a way to be able to access this state while being awake. Some people do it naturally. What has your research in this area yielded?

>>186 >What has your research in this area yielded? You truly managed to ask a not easy to answer question. Where to even start... So you might know this but I will write it down just in case. We live in the past. The time light enters into our physical eyes and our brain processes that takes time. That little time that it takes makes it so we can only "perceive" the past with our physical eyes because of that "lag". As we "witness" the present it is like looking at a river from the side as it flows from the shores but we know that everything is in that river so we only focus on that... So while we go into trance we are in a safe and stable state where we signal our body that it is safe enough to go to sleep and with that it switches on to the "lightshow" so it can entertain us while our body activates the sleep protocols then we fall asleep. With that we can change the "stream of information" to the other eyes that you might be familiar with. There are several ways. One way is to be "half trance" all the time but I consider that dangerous because life usually needs more attention than that. The other way is to expand the processing abilities of the brain so it can freely process "witnessing" several streams at once and ofc learn to "feel" the other eyes. The problem ofc is that the way we open even our physical eyes is automatic and you have to get in touch with your deeper psyche to get the hang of it. So the "trick" is to get the feel of the "mystical stream of energies" that give the visions and convince your "true eye" to "look at it". Which is hard because first it just happens then it becomes natural but you will need to transcend your ego so you are not "chained" to look at the "ground" all the time. The false ego is obsessed with the false reality. Once that obsession weakens the perception of the superego might appear. Another fun fact. We have 2 physical eyes but our brain makes an image like we see from a single eye. The trick is to realize that your physical eyes are "not more real" than the "other eyes" and yes you said well... There are multiple "third eyes" and all of them have lenses that are able to witness different levels of reality. Now the hard part is that every eye is fueled with different kind of high spiritual energies and yield different kind of visions and it takes real mastery not just to use them but to even able to explain it to others. The advice I can give is start to activate your "inner sight" and notice how the energies connect to your third eye. First it will be like 2 main wires the yin and yang. The 2 hemispheres of the brain and in the middle it connects to something. And as your sight improves you will be able to see the other energy circuits that can fuel the eye. It will look spectacular once you see it. Ofc you will need to learn to pace yourself because as it can give you gifts it can give quite the burden because you will see things that are not meant to be seen if you are not careful. First it is like a "breakthrough" like breaking larger energy blocks and connecting your brain and it's parts like it never meant to be which might result in a sort of madness but if you are able to overcome it you will be able to see the intricacies and master it's energy movement. Sadly some people are natural at it while some just unlocks higher state of awareness and intuitively know everything how it works so it's hard to know what advice I could give you that will help at all. Also working with entities that are famous of clairvoyance is a good idea. They can guide you to the stream you want to see. Can't really recommend any because the success rate depends on your compatibility with the entity and how much he/she likes you. You will have to experiment with that but an astral wisdom waifu is always a good way for learning these mysteries. >that will even make sense to expect an informed answer Hope this helped a little. If you have more questions please write down how you "experience" the alpha and theta states and how the visions appear so I can gauge the current level of your ability. This is more of an art than a science and while I could write several essays about this topic I am not sure it would be much help. There are many books and sources on the internet most of them mentioned in the sticky too so I am not sure if there is a point for me of writing these.

>>187 Thanks. Well, it seems like when you get to it, the bottom line is "just figure it out", which I kind of expected. >write down how you "experience" the alpha and theta states and how the visions appear I have identified three distinct modes. 1. There's a visual imagination, almost like day dreaming, somewhere in front, above and to the left side of my head, at arm's length. If I look there with my mind's eye, I can imagine visuals that can form on their own responding to my intention to look at something. This works with my eyes open, but it's difficult to pull if I can't relax to enter alpha (I used an EEG band to check, and using this skill will always increase my alpha waves). 2. Closing my eyes (which almost automatically boosts alpha waves) makes this easier. However, I've noticed if my mood is such that I'm hyper alert, I will have trouble disengaging from my physical eyes, which are looking at my closed eyelids. This is the method I use to perform purely astral magick. 3. Going to sleep and catching the hypnagogic state. This is where I've been the most successful. By holding the intention to look at something while falling asleep, I almost always get a flash or a short clip in extremely vivid detail. Sometimes this will even result in an astral projection. The problem is, this is not a practical way to use clairvoyance. And I risk falling asleep. In all three cases, actively imagining something as if to "prime" the vision sometimes helps. Number 3 is the reason I posted this question, because last night I ended up seeing a written label on something, and I started reading it. But it felt as if I was looking through a narrow hole to the left of my vision and my "head" (non physical) was positioned in such a way that I couldn't properly align the hole with what I was trying to see. When the state passed, I tried to summon it again to no avail. Now that I think about it, this is similar to something I have had happen occasionally while meditating, in which I started seeing like a very potent flashlight or a sun in front of my face (through my "other" eyes), although partially occluded, as if there were clouds or branches in front of me.

>>188 >"just figure it out", which I kind of expected. The thing the "just figure it out" is the way spirituality works but you will learn that everyone that does spirituality reached the same milestones but from different directions and once you "figure it out" it's obvious and explaining obvious things is always hard. >I used an EEG band to check Holy shit I always wanted one when I was still a novice for these accurate readings but never really bothered buying when I had no time for serious practice and once I became serious it was not needed because things just worked out. Am glad someone took the path I forgot to take. What you wrote down is perfect and meticulous but it might hamper your intuitive leaps a little but no worries you are on the right path. As your energy flows expand the "scope" of imagined space will be larger than your whole field of vision. It's quite peculiar how you can describe the exact space where it appears. Try move it so it appears at different places in your vision because that way you will stimulate different parts of the visual cortex in your brain. Might feel impossible at first and you will need to learn to "rotate" the "imagined space" because our mind "sees" in 2D while reality is in 3D. Developing the inner sight is good because the body is 3D and "seeing it" forces you to make 3D formations in your mind's eye without the involvement of the human eyes which is like 2.5D due "depth perception" >which are looking at my closed eyelids It was long ago when I was truly looking at them holy shit. Once I close it then I signal my brain that "I need no more need of awareness for them and then shift into the other eye". Did not even realize how I ignore them. >This is the method I use to perform purely astral magick. This is good practice. It teaches you the "multifocus". Truth is that there is different stages of awareness and focus and while you consciously not "focusing" your subconscious still "keeps watch" so you will have to understand how your subconscious/"guardian angel" is watching always while you are "working". Noticed while driving in a half trance how my driving abilities just "pulled me out of trance" and reflexively hit the brakes before I consciously even gave the command and other similar activities. DON'T DRIVE IN HALF TRANCE KIDS btw >The problem is, this is not a practical way to use clairvoyance True but a good practice nonetheless. It will stimulate your third eye properly then once it reaches a point you will feel the energies there moving and you will be able to control it. >But it felt as if I was looking through a narrow hole to the left of my vision That is your third eye. It's like how your eyes are shut in the morning because dried rheum is on it so it takes a little "effort" to open it. The 3rd eye is like that too. Also it is like a "long tube" in the brain and you have to "align it" >this is similar to something I have had happen occasionally while meditating, in which I started seeing like a very potent flashlight or a sun in front of my face (through my "other" eyes), although partially occluded, as if there were clouds or branches in front of me. That's it!. That is what you are looking for. That is the sign your third eye properly receiving energies for the first time. Keep it up and with that your hemispheres will connect. I don't know how you will experience it exactly because it varies but that is the thing you are looking for. The activation/expansion of the third eye. And you said it well there are "more eyes" but it will be like that your eye is just "larger" not just in size but in complexity too. It's like your 3rd eye has more dimensions. 1D is the "dot" you focus on that dot to access it. 2D is the "mind" then that 2D and the 2D that you witness IRL kinda merge then the "real 3D" begins then you go into higher dimensions that I see no need to talk about. Keep going and it will happen. It's like sex tbh. Somehow everyone figured it out how to do it before mandatory sex education. But that doesn't mean everyone knows "all the positions". >as if there were clouds or branches in front of me. They are like the capillaries in the eye yes. You are seeing it. It is a sort of energy block which will clear up. Keep going and either force it or "let go and let it happen". Don't know what is the good advice here but you are on the good track. Maybe look at at spiritual drawings of the third eye or something that might help a little but it might be not even needed.

>>185 I probably should've known that this would be the case. I've been trying to work on improving my abilities, and so I'm looking for someone more experienced to chat with since I really have no idea what I'm doing. Don't get me wrong, /fringe/ is great, but I don't want to turn it into a personal chatroom or blog. And I'm so spiritually deficient I can't follow >>184 , so I guess it's just suffering for now until I can improve myself.

>>190 >Don't get me wrong, /fringe/ is great, but I don't want to turn it into a personal chatroom or blog. Yeah we have such active discussions here your blogposting would truly hurt the flow of information on this board. Lmao On a serious note. What you are doing is basic awakening and the sign that you are taking spirituality seriously and will stumble a little here and there at first but the point is don't lose hope. It's like walking. Those kids who are not scared of falling and try again over and over will learn to walk faster. But those who never try might never learn it. Also because your case is something everyone went through or something everyone that wants to take spirituality seriously will go through there is no harm talking about it. Might be educational for others too and might even reveal some minor insights for well established practitioners too. Like seriously can't believe someone bought an EEG band. I might do it too just because after this. >I guess it's just suffering for now until I can improve myself. Forget the suffering part. It is a good feeling. You will have to learn how "good" it feels. Running is fun. Remember how you ran around all the time as kid? it's fun. While learning to walk slowly and steadily is slow sloggish and booooring. Learning to run before you learn to walk. Sometimes that is how spirituality is. You unleash an energy overload activate most of your systems then learn to pace yourself. You might be too meticulous for that tho. At least you don't take the mental ward vacation path like some of the practitioners do sometimes. >I probably should've known that this would be the case. Yeah it will be kinda like that. You will know that this whole thing is obvious but for some reason it is the most inscrutable secret for many. And yes I too don't always have time to write my longposts but that doesn't mean I will always ignore the questions but in the end you will be the one that figures out the answers. I too >trying to work on improving my abilities But it is like a waterslide for me now. It is impossible to not improve them because I constantly use them but that doesn't mean meditating instead of sitting front of my laptop is not more beneficial. You too are nearing that waterslide. Don't give up. And as you said. >/fringe/ is great Let's turn it into the best! I still somewhat owe this place for keeping the inspiration for spirituality with me through all the years. Also you posted with a flag. You are the part of /fringe/ now. But who knows someone might want to chat later. For me it's getting late so you have to wait till I reply next. At least you can practice and maybe figure out the question and the answers by yourself. Most questions are dumb but sometimes not asking the question is the dumbest thing. And this is the questions thread made for these dumb questions. The more question you ask and the more you can answer which will make you less dumb in the end won't it. If being dumb makes you smarter then is being dumb really dumb? Never forget about the fool because the fool set out so he finds the secrets of the arcana. The fool walks the path to overcome his foolishness. The real fools are those who never dared to even walk the path.

>>191 Wow, thanks for the advice. If I can offer anything in return, then I'd like to mention that Soulseek (that p2p software known for music sharing) has a surprising amount of other stuff on it as well, including occult texts.

How to deal with nightmares? Recurring nightmares that happen often? I'm getting back in touch with my dreams and trying to astral project again after a long time, and this shit really pisses me off.

>>182 well after some thought, I can't think of anything verifiably wrong with this fairy; there shouldn't be any real harm in not preventing her from being around you as long as you don't trust her further than you can throw her also, immediately after my previous reply to you, another word entered my head out of the blue; "raspberry", which presumably meant the tongue noise; I suspect she sent that message herself, and the last one too, but it was prolly my unconsciousness fucking with me again I was trying to see if she was gonna recommend you to a particularly subversive branch of Christianity such as mormonism or a calvary churchiirc those are glownigger joints, but I've got nothing on that response of hers

>>189 Nice. Thanks.

>>193 Face them. Face your fears face your demons enter into the dark night of the soul. Your fears can be exploited and if you are unable to deal with them in your dreams then it will be even worse in the astral. All your fears can be materialized there and if you don't know how to deal with them by instinct you will be overwhelmed. Get in touch with those fears and feel where they stem from. If they are mundane then overcome them if they come from some not so mundane direction then learn cleansing rituals. The classic is the lesser banishing ritual of the pentagram but there are many. Just google spiritual cleansing and protection. >this shit really pisses me off. If it truly angers you then forge a blade from that anger an astral blade imagine it feel it with you all the time be it daytime or nighttime feel it's iron feel it's flame feel how much it hurts those who you strike. And do some dreamchecks. Make a habit at looking at some talisman or some bodily feature on your body like your hands fingers lines on your palm or mark your hand with some symbol so you know you are not dreaming. Knowing that it is a dream is important because then you know this time you have to fight and learn to understand how to have powers in the dreams. You have to awaken your fighting spirit and realize how you can defeat hostiles in any situation. >Recurring nightmares that happen often? If you want you can tell about those here or in the dreams thread and I might be able to explain what you are dealing with but only if you think this is something others should get involved with. Recurring nightmares usually stem from an issue we are forced to deal with no matter what and those need to be solved ASAP or things might just get worse on the long run. Noticing the theme of these dreams is important because that is the starting point you can start applying methods to deal with them. TL;DR.: Learn spiritual cleansing Psychic protection and git gud

Persona 5 is about a group of people who essentially do astral travels to the collective unconscious and the subconscious of people to right wrongs. I know for a fact that you can influence people by visiting them, but do you think there are organized groups out there doing this?

>>198 >do you think there are organized groups out there doing this? Nah no wai that couldn't be real haha no wai anyone would do that especially not the CIA who literally has documents about remote viewing and project stargate nor the Soviet psychic researches that were also no wai real haha. And there are definitely no psychic groups on the internet or offline affiliated with larger organizations or independent doing these. Bro... That would be crazy. Imagine tax payer money funding psychic warfare haha. Imagine entities working with occultists doing this. That couldn't be real. Not in my perfect and normal scientific worldview! Where only reason rules and nothing can challenge that! Ofc there are many groups doing that. But the way they operate is clunky as hell and there is no point talking about it in the open >>196 >TL;DR.: Learn spiritual cleansing Psychic protection and git gud This advice is not only for "Nightmares". Also >to right wrongs Their definition of "right" and "wrong" might differ an itty bit from your definition of >to right wrongs

Most people believe in reincarnation, but others, like Swedenborg, believed we are born here, we grow into a spiritual shape, and then shed our bodies and our traumas, which stay behind and stick to new souls being born. This is what people mistake for past life memories, leftover energy from departed souls. How do we know what's real? The implications for one path of truth vs another would be huge. I need to know.

>>199 I don’t know if you’ve played the game, but the “personas”, which are essentially Pokemon, mechanically, are spirits taken from the Goetia and mythology, and they all have Tarot associations and a little bit of personality flavor and interaction that shows the kind of entity it would be. It looks like it could almost be a workable system to work with those spirits. Videogames as grimoires. Now that’s Chaos Magick.

>>200 >How do we know what's real? ;^) >I need to know Well you posted with a Gnostic flag so you better get those gnosis going and find out the answer because it is too late for me to try to type down the answer and even I don't know the full answer to that question just a chunk of it. >>201 >I don’t know if you’ve played the game I watched the Persona 4 anime and seen some memes about 5 so I got the gist. >It looks like it could almost be a workable system to work with those spirits It is already a workable system and the game is inspired from that workable system. Japs have quite the good libraries and hobbies into western mysticism. Probably it stems from the way they do Shinto and accept all faiths as part of the larger truth and don't ignore it as heathenism by default. >Now that’s Chaos Magick. Oh you have no idea of the extent of it. Understanding how "chaos" is just the manifestation of a "Greater Order".

>>200 >The implications for one path of truth vs another would be huge Actually it is not a "versus" but just different sides of a coin. After we die yes we are able to >shed our bodies and our traumas if we are not too attached to them. If we are too attached then you need to go to a hell/purgatory realm where they will burn/remove that from you. >stick to new souls being born Now this is the tricky part. Life. Death. Rebirth. That is the 3 stage... Rebirth is an actual renewal. A complete one. It will be hard time to differentiate between an "old soul" that existed in this plane of existence for millenniums vs someone who just came to earth just because he can. There are ways to do it but let's not get into this now. >This is what people mistake for past life memories, leftover energy from departed souls. And this is the other "tricky part". How necromancy works. You can summon the "real spirit" and ask him questions from the afterlife if you have the authority to do so but only if the spirit is in an afterlife/heaven dimension and did not really move onto the next life yet or a deity appoints him to be an overseer spirit that has the duty/ability to guide the earth. Also summoning souls that want to just "rest" is rude and they will be a little mad for uselessly disturbing them with inane shit. And then there is the other necromancy where you are not exactly summoning the spirit but the leftover "energetic rags" of the soul that contain memories and skills. That necromancy is less "rude" but it is the equivalent of wading through trash to find treasure. It's like a sort of spiritual compost which can be quite disgusting and is usually the expertise of the death gods. And there is "archetype resonance". When your soul reaches an awakening level you might reattain a "lost part of your past journey". Some soul memories are quite burdensome and carrying that weight is not always easy so retaining it needs preparation but yes it is like the "lost soul" noticing you and recognizes you. And then there is the part when some people merge with an identity and think they are that person. There were many people in the past that believed they are Jesus because of this. This is why accepting some information from the otherside at face value is dangerous sometimes. Especially if some past lives have some larger egregoric following because that might create false personalities from the imagination of the others and might merge with someone where they create just an another false ego. This is no simple matter. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_people_claimed_to_be_Jesus Have this short list of Jesuses. Delusion is a weird drug for the mind and you have to go past that to find truth. It's not always easy. Some people just love the taste of sweet lies not realizing how harmful that is. Not always easy to overcome it. Hope this answered it a little or maybe just made you ask even more questions. >How do we know what's real? Good question and the answer is even longer to this that I am still unable to word. The first thing you have to understand is >How do we know anything at all? What is intellect what is consciousness what it means to "know" with no doubts how our senses work what are our senses again. What is qualia? These questions made philosophy spirituality and all mysteries we have on earth. You can read on them on the net nowadays but it's better to learn to tap into the gnosis part of the mind and learn to figure out all questions because even if someone tells you the answer you might not able to understand it. Writing and words are limited and they are not always able to express the full truth of knowledge a person has.

Is there any way for a /fringe/ n00b to tell what books/information is true and what is just bullshit? Or do you just have to learn through gnosis?

>>206 You just figure it out like everybody else. A good rule of thumb is to meditate every day so that your two minds get to know each other.

If you haven't check out Montalk's music if you like metal. Production is a bit meh, but the music is banger and magical. https://neptunianhorizon.bandcamp.com/album/descent

>>206 >bullshit? I remember the days of bullshit occultism on this board. I don't even remember if we even agreed upon good books in the end. >just have to learn through gnosis For me that way is far less effort than reading all the books that I saved from fringe though the years. 100s of gigabytes of trash that I am not even sure I will ever bother reading properly. I skimmed them years ago and that was more than enough. Not to mention most of them say the same things over and over again with different flavors. >>207 This btw >>208 >released October 10, 2011 I never realized this was this old.

>>206 Discernment will rely on gnosis, experience, and your own common sense. A good rule of thumb is that f the info is written to appeal to your base self with flattery and promises of fulfilling your desires (money, power, fame, women, etc.), it's probably bullshit. If the message is designed to frighten you to the point of pure despair, then it's also bullshit.

I wonder if this has happened to anybody else. I have become quite adept at manifesting my desires (and that of others), I can communicate with spirits and engage in telepathy with sensitive people or the subconscious of anybody else. And every few days I will hate the world, hate myself, want to die and for the cosmos itself to just go fuck itself. I feel so nihilistic and jaded I just sleep or meditate. It’s depression, but at any time I can just flick a switch, alter that energy and feel fine. If work needs to be done, I have no trouble caring, getting up and getting on with it. However, this feels of so little value. If wants and feelings can be manipulated this easily, where is the inherent value in anything? It’s driving me nuts. Not even “depression” is real. It’s an energy that can be manipulated like any other. What the fuck. I’m seriously at a loss.

>>220 Iktf. Been there. The world is an illusion as they say and you just realized how you can manipulate different layers of the illusions but you did not manage to find out what is real. You are at the stage of pic related. >And every few days I will hate the world, hate myself, want to die and for the cosmos itself to just go fuck itself. I feel so nihilistic and jaded I just sleep or meditate. It’s depression, but at any time I can just flick a switch, alter that energy and feel fine. If work needs to be done Get in touch with that feeling and figure out where it stems from. As you said >I have become quite adept at manifesting my desires Now does that mean you manifested that depression or your subconscious or the inherent depression that is within everyone nowadays is just manifesting within you as a consequence because you are messing with their desires. Why is that there who is manifesting that force that feeling within you. Is it a past trauma? Society? The demiurge? Why is it there at all. Is it simple energy deficiency? Because yes energy deficiency depending the way you manifest things can also appear as depression or sickness. That is also a thing. Maybe it is your inherent desire for death? To face the dark night of the soul? Don't try to "overwrite" that energy face it and ask questions. I too was in that state for long and had to understand all the reasons behind it. >If wants and feelings can be manipulated this easily, where is the inherent value in anything? You are asking very enlightened questions but that does not mean there are no answers to this. There are many problems with the question ofc... and improper questions have improper answers so let's start somewhere. >wants and feelings can be manipulated this easily You will have to understand what are "wants and feelings" on the deepest layers. Can you convince a dried out tree to bloom or the dead to come back to life? Changing some feelings in superficial mundanes is not the true bottom of this skill and... >inherent value What gives things value what gives anything "inherent value". Which food is more valuable? The rarer the tastier the one that has a long shelf life or the one that costs the most in the supermarket. What has more value food gold or a piece of paper that people use to convey value. And the word inherent... What are your inherent abilities where do they stem from why do you even pursue them are they truly inherent or they are just superficial manifestation of your current self. Is there a force that manipulates you to pursue these abilities? Or is it your inherent desire? If it is your inherent desire then why are you depressed using them? >What the fuck. I’m seriously at a loss. Been that way for more than a decade but my life was too busy and too hectic to have time dealing with it. In the last years things calmed down so I had time facing these problems. Took time to learn to not overwrite it by instinct but to go into it's origin source. Then I had to learn how I can fix others the way I fix myself which helped me to further understand the depths of emotional and mental alchemy. It's no easy and once you go down the rabbit hole you realize rabbits can't even dig deep enough. You will have to continue the digging by yourself. My advice is that try to figure out when that feeling of depression sets in get in touch with that energy and understand how it manifests. Then the next lessons in the dark night of the soul will be the fear of death and the light of hope/reason to live/purpose. This is an enormously long topic so I am not sure what else I should say.

>>220 > If wants and feelings can be manipulated this easily, where is the inherent value in anything? To me this sounds like it stems from an atheist world-view. The feelings are the same, but the sense that -nothing- has a value imo is the lack of any personal belief or grasp on what actually matters to you. It's not about accepting some value system but to create your own, even if not some elaborate system, at least an instinctual grasp in your backbone which tells you what thing to value and which to give up. Like with economic theory which is said to be bunk, already existing value or belief systems do create a conceptual frame of reference which will help you consider different situations and their values to you personally. You may end up rejecting the lot of it, but through studying what others do believe in and why, you can learn about yourself and your own innate value.

>>223 If I'm really honest with myself, the thing that matters to me most is avoiding my own and the suffering of others. I like seeing others suffer as a result of energy rebalances because it gives them the opportunity to rise higher. But it vexes me to see them squander that opportunity. That is in a nutshell the basis of my morality. But I don't think anything, any experience or any thing, holds intrinsic value. >>221 Once when I was struggling in that state I heard the words >what do you feel? I realized I didn't feel what I was feeling, if that makes any sense. It was my mind who was thinking I felt like that. I was actually fine underneath. I considered I was picking up on something external, or perhaps it was my body that had something wrong with it. One of my first instincts was energy depletion. But things got much better once I stopped considering myself something separate from my being in that state and started treating like a rash or a pain that accompanies a condition as of yet unknown. I will know it by finding it again and again, as it seems I will unavoidably do.

>>220 >If wants and feelings can be manipulated this easily, where is the inherent value in anything? I've theorized that the existence of everyone and everything that the all created is either an exercise for the all to try to entertain itself, evolve, or both. What else is there to do if you're the mind of the all, but to make & run these simulations that we're experiencing? But really, I probably shouldn't be imposing the concept of boredom upon something like the all, so it's probably just an evolution exercise. I personally try to just enjoy life, but keep my enjoyment on a leash; I admittedly don't keep my leash as tight as I'd like to, though. Also, if you can manipulate feelings as easily as you can say, have you tried manipulating your unconsciousness' feelings to make you feel capable of doing magic that you haven't been able to do before? I'd imagine you have, but I'd figured I'd ask anyway.

>>224 >I realized I didn't feel what I was feeling, if that makes any sense. I know what you mean. >It was my mind who was thinking I felt like that. For me it was a little different. I knew that my "emotions" are not "me". I knew it is like tiredness or like a taste food generate something easy to ignore and overwrite. For me emotions were a sort of fuel... an alchemical substance that I picked for different situations to enhance my being. I realized that some emotions naturally awaken my inner powers in a way. The first realization was boredom. A boredom when I just sit down and stare into the distance gives me a sort of gnosis most of the time. Then there were 2 emotions that gave me the most power over situations. It was pure happiness which was hard to come by and the other was pure unfiltered rage. I realized back in my teens that the world will make angry no matter what so it is better to understand the "fuel" that rage can produce. I can come out of every situation if I am angry enough and anger is better than giving up no matter the situation. But there are situations when you have to rest and with anger rest is impossible. Despair... that force is great for a rest. It makes you stay in bed keeps you calm. Why fight why worry why think just embrace that darkness and wait for the moment anger can arise. I realized with these I can conquer any hell the world will throw at my face but... I was not aware the consequences of living with this mentality for more than a decade. As I realized my emotions can be handled like it is a different part of me existing separate from my eternally calm mind and I only need to connect them to my thinking processes as an extra energy boost when the situation around me goes bad... I realized that whenever I am not around to handle a situation things collapse. If I did not micromanage situations and people things collapsed. I asked myself quite often. >What I am feeling today The answer appeared on it's own. I want to kill everyone It was a sign that things were bad but I knew it is just part of the process. Emotions are easy to handle and whenever I hated doing something I mixed in a bunch of positive emotions so I enjoy the work more no matter how banal it was. That was a problem. That was a lie and I hate lies deep down. I thought my body is just a machine that you just feed different programs hormones emotions and it works. I was not aware of the thing that lied underneath. When my awakening was taking up pace and my energies were soaring if people got me mad they got visibly sick they lost the ability to control their body. They were terrified of me on an instinctual level. My emotions started to infect their mind without me giving the command to do it. Because they gave me the command to do it. They angered me therefore they want my anger and there is a natural energy exchange between people that I did not realize back then. I did not realize how people shackle themselves the moment they talk to each other. I did not realize the energetic karma people made for themselves and lived with and how I am affecting it just being around. I realized that the source of energy I used as my main fuel had to go. I had to let go of my fall back power I had to erase it. Then only despair remained. Getting out of despair was easy. Get angry grit your teeth and rise up. No anger no outsider force moving me resulted in despair. Had to awaken my desire to live because I almost died but that was still not enough. I had too many negative emotions and they all had to go. I had to find the proper emptiness the absolute NOTHING so I am undisturbed to retain my truth. Since the industrial revolution people are ruining themselves in unprecedented scales and ways. Every decade people find something that can ruin them like nothing before. Had to realize what genetic turmoil it caused on humanity in the last centuries >>223 >To me this sounds like it stems from an atheist world-view For me it sounds like the sentiment Nietzsche wrote How "God is dead. And we have killed him" and because of that we have to become the Übermensch to give meaning to life itself. When I was reading Thus spoke Zarathustra I realized that every quality he says an Übermensch should have is something that I do already and this book is not really giving me anything new. As I was halfway through I was thinking where this will lead and that this book will just give me the answer that an "Übermensch" needs no authority no master no book to tell him what to do because he knows what to do. And with that I closed the book and never finished it. The problem with the idea of "Übermensch" means that we need to "rise above" something and we know how Nietzsche ended up in his life and he was unable to live up to his writings. This is why he never published them personally but her sister. Rising above is important ofc but there is a ceiling then we have to look deep within and understand every emotion we have inside us and feel where they come from. Most of our thoughts emotions and habits are not our own. They are just patterns and energies taken from the outside world that we just repeat over and over. What I write is also not original because others also said similar things but not exactly this. We have to understand where these energies come from and what they do to us. Once we see and feel the unseen it can be handled it can be grabbed and it can be taken apart and recycled. >things got much better once I stopped considering myself something separate from my being in that state and started treating like a rash It's important to not ignore a problem but get to the bottom of it one way or the other. >I will know it by finding it again and again, as it seems I will unavoidably do. It is good when you finally understand how unavoidable it is because then you might realize that a proactive approach might solve the problem faster.

>>224 >But I don't think anything, any experience or any thing, holds intrinsic value. This is a lie coming from you. If it was true you would be dead already. Your appetite would weaken your will to live would vanish you would succumb to an illness and die or just would walk absentmindedly into a fatal accident. I know this because I knew people who were in a state where they invited death into their life. Had to realize you cannot save those people no matter what. You can just push them towards death where they can decide if they want to truly die or want to renew their desire to live. Back then I had no power to help these people. Nowadays things are different. >the thing that matters to me most is avoiding my own and the suffering of others For me what matters is to people stop creating pointless suffering for others and themselves. I accepted that pain and suffering are necessary parts of life long ago but seeing while growing up that people just create cycles of hurt for the dumbest of reasons was something I detested. Especially as I was able to notice the potential every person has individually in themselves and how they are unable to manifest that without help then drag down everyone into their misery then complain about why everything is so miserable. Hell is other people as they say. Took while to realize what it means to cleanse them from their "energetic parasites". >>223 >-nothing- has a value "Nothing" has an extremely high value in spirituality. The true nothingness the true silence the absolute lack of disturbances. This is why altruism is something important in every religion. You will have to give away most of your things just to notice what has value. The value of food increases with your hunger but you can realize the different hungers the body has and how no food no materia no experience can sate that but only numb it for a moment. >lack of any personal belief or grasp on what actually matters to you. While this is true I think his current problem is that he is aware of a higher value system but unable to "see it". Because those values will only appear once he goes through the veil of despair he entangled himself. Superficial easy to manipulate feelings are not "real feelings" they are just lies. Once the feelings reach a true and deep level of intensity the values of existence becomes undeniable. I don't think he needs to create a belief system but find his own but experimenting always helps the arise of insights. Feel the allure of despair and reach into it. You might find something solid in the process. If nothing has inherent value then despair is the same right? It is the same as happiness joy and anger. Go as deep as you can and notice why your body wants to stay in bed all the time. Test your "no inherent value" theory to it's fullest. If everything has 0 value then try to go into so deep until you notice a "negative value" and once you are in it you will have no choice but to acknowledge that there must be a positive value at the opposite side. Or maybe it is a full circle? Can you go so deep in despair to find hope?

>>225 >I've theorized that the existence of everyone and everything that the all created What you say is on a good track and I am not sure if I should say it instead of letting you realize but it is quite the common knowledge already in overall spirituality so I don't consider it as a spoiler. >the all created The all did not "create". I am not even sure if you can say that the ALL "exists". Most you can say about the ALL that it "is" the ALL. It goes through cycles that may or may not be predetermined may or may not be influenced and may or may not repeat the same process over and over which may or may not have an end at all if "end" has a meaning at all. It's not meaningless and I could say odes about THE ALL with my own thoughts or via channeling from my higher guides. Don't interchange the ALL with the idea of God aka skydaddy you learned from religion nor think it as a creator. It is all existence the one you can perceive and the one you cannot. Once an entity appeared front of me and I asked is he God and he told me my concept of God is flawed and I should not try to describe him as such. He gave me some sort of anointment. And yes I sorta was testing him with this question. I am always at lookout for entities trying to mess with me. The quality of their answer usually reveals their stature and purpose >or both And even more. >probably just an evolution exercise Would you call your breathing as an evolution exercise? Because it is more like "breathing" for the ALL and not like it is "trying" to do something. Once you understand rhythm you will see how these things go but I too cannot say I understand the true depth of it. >keep my enjoyment on a leash Try to understand that leash and figure out why you need it. The best life is the one that you can live without the leash. Dogs that live on a leash will require the leash all the time while those who can be free without the leash can go anywhere because they won't get into trouble without it. Once you awaken your desires might go out of control or that leash might inhibit your awakening. If the leash is the only thing that makes you stay away from trouble then ask yourself. What is pulling you into that trouble? Animals are ruled by their instincts. That is their "true leash". Humans learned to tame animals before they learned how to make a leash. They mastered the instincts and did not "leash it". Understand the inner animal. >Also, if you can manipulate feelings as easily as you can say, have you tried manipulating your unconsciousness' feelings to make you feel capable of doing magic that you haven't been able to do before? I He should try manipulating his subconscious to try to figure out inherent value in existence. I know how annoying it is. Especially when I had to learn "Effortlessness". Put effort into learning effortlessness. Sure is fun solving paradoxes with my guides. Your entire body straining itself to keep it effortless. It's impossible until everything clicks then you just think yourself >How did I not figure this out earlier it's obvious

>>231 >Don't interchange the ALL with the idea of God aka skydaddy you learned from religion nor think it as a creator. I don't do the former, but it's hard for me to not imagine it as a mind that's just imagining all of this happening. I do remember reading somewhere that nothing actually exists as you sorta said, but accepting that can only do so much for my perception in my current state. >Once you awaken your desires might go out of control or that leash might inhibit your awakening. Some timing for you to mention that; I had an experience that could perhaps be described as an awakening earlier this week, but the really short version is that I un-awakened myself right away by erecting a shield of doubt around myself because my desires are and previously were out of control. I figure another opportunity to awaken will arise soon enough; I'm hoping I'll figure out how to tame my unwanted desires by then. I could elaborate alot more if you want, but I feel like someone might think I'm blogposting if I do.

>>232 >I don't do the former Yes you do... Even I do it sometimes. We all do it. Because the ALL can (and cannot at the same time) think create and be bored because it is THE ALL after all but the problem is that we don't notice how our subconscious already made "labels" limitations and shackles for THE ALL that is within everything. It happens so we remain sane ofc so it is not a flaw entirely but it is important that we remind ourselves always to dig deeper. It's kind complicated how THE ALL can manifest for us so we can consciously interact with it. I know you are somewhat aware of this but repeating what we know already is sometimes important so we deepen our knowledge. This is the purpose of mantras. >it as a mind that's just imagining all of this happening Now here will come the weird thing. THE ALL IS MIND. I always liked that concept and yes it is but... what is the mind? It's not the body nor the spirit. Then what is the body? It's that fleshy thing we inhabit. Is the brain the mind? Well kinda. If there is a problem with the body and with the brain our connection to our mind gets disrupted. So where do we draw the line between the mind and the body? Then the next question. What is the spirit. And what is the GREAT SPIRIT. Is the ALL a spirit with a mind or it is the mind of spirits? Are the spirits the images of the mind? >that's just imagining all of this happening Now this will be the problematic part to unlock. What is imagining? When you paint an image in your mind that you can see with your mind's eye? We accept this as the definition of imagining yes but what are dreams and visions. Who "Imagines" them. Is it you or your subconscious or an another force paints an image in your head so you can see it? Visions and other mental works stimulate the brain and it changes your brainwaves. So a mere image affects the flesh and that means it affects the physical. And magic is about making the mental and the physical connect via the spirit or via other forces. This is why the ALL IS MIND concept is important so little neophytes understand the power of imagination. So what I am trying to say here is that "imagining" is an active process you do with your "brain muscles" while visions and dreams are sort of passive. Daydreams are an inbetween. What I am trying to say that it is important to not force our mind to thing that THE ALL is actively doing something instead it just "breathing" of sorts. With that you can recognize patterns within THE ALL because it is within and without us it is in everything you can and cannot perceive. It's important that accept that it is a force that not just "connects" us but that is us and more. You can hear the intents and wishes of reality as you move forward but some of them are just patterns that repeat so "reality" can be maintained. >that can only do so much for my perception in my current state. Yeah don't worry no need to accept something before you are unable to experience it firsthand. The only thing that is important to "entertain the idea" keep an open mind so when it happens we have a frame of reference so we can use to generate an understanding faster. Also I am not writing this to lecture you it is just a sort of "food for thought" and I am practicing my ability to put my thoughts into words. If I am unable to word my understanding that it means it is still too hazy and not grounded enough so I can rely on it. I am trying to figure out the "tone" I want to use to talk with people on different levels. Not easy. You can fly off the handle and get lost in your own thoughts and notice you are talking to yourself because no one can understand you anymore. It's important to notice the other person in the conversation otherwise the message doesn't go through. You are on the good track btw but figuring out what is the push we need so we can start rolling is hard sometimes. >short version is that I un-awakened myself right away by erecting a shield of doubt around myself Iktf and don't worry that is natural. You will have to understand your feelings your fear why you fear your desires and what are the things you fear will happen once awakening starts. You will have to understand them then untangle them. >I figure another opportunity to awaken will arise soon enough Maybe. It depends on the forces that push us towards it. Be their inner or outsider forces. I had a thirst for every type of awakening so I transmuted my desires to fuel it further and doubt is something I learned to handle since my teens when I learned how to use psychic powers. When you are in doubt ask that doubt. What do you doubt why you doubt what is the feeling that wants you to stay "unawakened". Awakenings are not all fun and sunshine. It can be a real madness too. Not everyone can handle that. For me it was different because i craved that madness. This mundane retardation we have around is the worst by default and even the shittiest spiritual experiences I had were better no matter how terrifying they were when they happened. And some of them were the sickest most perverted and disturbing realizations I had to go through. But I would have done it no matter what because it was a necessary step. To live you have to eat and if you eat you have to shit. Shit is part of life too and spirituality will have those valleys of despair too. The dark night of the soul turns into the dork night of the soul sometimes. Not to mention how our unconscious bleeds into the collective unconscious and vice versa and we will have to experience that too. So fret not doubt is good. There is no need to rush but understand the danger of pretending to stay ignorant. Because you cannot live in the blissful ignorance anymore. You know something exists beyond already. The only thing you can do is live in the lie like most people do. Oh and if something feels too terrible to accept. Go deeper into that case because everything has silver lining and you will have to find that. Manure feeds the crop fields and the pastures and that makes food. But you cannot eat shit by yourself. It needs to go through different layers of cultivation first. >I'll figure out how to tame my unwanted desires by then It's tricky. What is "taming". It is a control or manipulation of sorts where we take out the aggressive and dangerous behaviors. We think it is about making something weak meek docile and submissive to our control. Now this is not true overall. Taming attack dogs is about bringing out the ferocity of the dog but only against our targets while taming wild animals for entertainment like in a circus is an another thing altogether. Not to mention war beasts where horses and elephants were "tamed"/trained so they trample humans at the command of the rider. "Taming" is about understanding the desires in such level you have absolute control over them without inhibiting or overshadowing them. For me it was also important to learn to not inhibit my emotions because that will ruin my spiritual workings but to understand their flow and notice the dangerous energy pockets in my body that cause problems via bottling up old traumas. Not to mention for some realizations you have to let your feelings your desires to go out of control so it can make a breakthrough and understand why are they out of control from the start. Society can turn us into the worst kind of abused beasts. Today's psychology is barely even able to scratch the surface but they consider themselves an authority on mental sciences. And because of that mainstream concepts how your mind work can also inhibit your potential.

>>232 >I could elaborate alot more if you want, If you are comfortable about it go ahead. Might take me time to answer tho. >but I feel like someone might think I'm blogposting if I do. At least fringe gets bumped. If someone gets bothered that spirituality is being discussed on a spirituality board then that means we get more bumps lol... Fringe is so dead... Anything is better than this silence. Fringe always had blogposting arcs where neophytes discovered their potential and their adept senpais had a reason to talk about their findings. At least a conversation will start and people will have a reason to chime in. It is far more organic than writing down a 10 post long effort post about a magical system. At that level it is better to write a book. I am glad what this anon >>160 tried doing but it is something most people already do or heard about already. Also he posted without a flag thus not respecting fringe customs so he was ignored. Not to mention he said practice is more important than talking and that just makes me go practice instead of talking about basics with him... It's an another WE ARE TOO ENLIGHTENED TO POST IN IT thread and with that I include him too. He also gave up his effort posting fast. Also overcoming our anxiety and fear of the judgemental nature of others are also a part of the process. Some people think they are worthy being judges of others without realizing the judgement that's awaiting them. Feel free to post in the question thread that is it's purpose. Or if you feel creative and think there is a theme maybe you can make a thread about it too. We are barely above 10 threads on a year old board with a decade+ long history ;_; Go ahead and dump the lore. Maybe it will inspire others to do the same.

>>196 Sorry for the late reply, but thanks a lot for your post. It was really helpful, the day after you replied I got another similar nightmare and when a vision came to attack me I gave the motherfucker a spinebuster and sent him into oblivion. Several nightmares followed and this time I was able to fight all the visions persecuting me, in one of them I was even wearing a wizard's robe and chanting some kind of magical incantation to attack my enemies. Just using the astral blade method. I have entire notebooks filled with dream entries I used for record-keeping. These nightmares mostly involve unpleasant situations and people from my childhood and teenage years, however sometimes they evolve into something more morbid that I've come to call a "bovine dream". My mind mostly recycles people from my life, many times playing different roles, and minor roles are played by imagined persons. I just wanted to say that I'm glad I rediscovered this place. When the old 8chan fell I didn't know where to go, found a /fringe/ matrix group, but it quickly became dead. I think I was contacted by someone from here a few weeks ago, because I started to have these pleasant flashbacks to the old 8chan times and they led me here. I used to post a lot on /fringe/ and was going places in my magickal journey, but after those things I got lost and kinda went astray. I am here now and ready to get back on track. I was going to post one of the nightmares but it turned out to be much longer than I anticipated, so I will post on the dream thread later, along with other stuff that I found out from all those years of record keeping my dreams.

Anybody got any good techniques or meditations for healing the physical body? thanks in advance bros

>>235 >nightmares mostly involve unpleasant situations and people from my childhood and teenage years, There is the concept of "illusory nature of self". How the self is an illusion. Every person we meet becomes a subconscious tulpa within our head and every issue we have with them traumas or other negative experiences get stored in those tulpas and they are overtaking parts of the mind and body without us noticing it. The dark night of the soul refers to facing them and solving the problems. Now so far this sounds as mere psychology introspection and contemplation. This is the mundane part. The less mundane part is that because we think these people these subconscious tulpas are "not me" and "not a part of my mind I am able to control" it is possible for external entities and forces to overtake these tulpas. When that happens the tulpas start to act "out of character". This is why dreamcheck is important. Knowing when it is a dream and get ready for a fight >sometimes they evolve into something more morbid When this happens and they are stop being diplomatic or amicable then it's time to purge. With that you will flush out most of your unpleasant energies and acquire a dominant position and remind every entity infiltrating you that the only option for them is either being nice or being purged. Also awakening a fighting spirit helps a lot. Enjoying the fight enjoying the struggle makes others less likely to try something funny. It's like being DOOMguy in your dreams. Fun. Too fun. When I had too much fun fighting my guides called me over that "this is enough" and taught me a way how I can flush out these kind of negative energies so they are unable to bother me from that side anymore. We fight for peace and not fighting for the sake of fighting because that is also destructive in it's own way. But to reach that stage we need to fight. >My mind mostly recycles people from my life, many times playing different roles, and minor roles are played by imagined persons. Dreamchecks dreamchecks dreamchecks. You need to understand that it is a dream and it is in your head where you have control even if it feels otherwise. If you feel powerless realize that now is the time when you have to either awake IRL via focusing on your eyeballs and force opening them or become more based and awaken an inner power to defeat them. Taking control of yourself is the most important step on the path. Sometimes being attacked is a good sign because it shows there is still a place within your mind you did not explore yet. It's like in videogames. If there are enemies ahead it means you are in a new undiscovered area. After all hostilities are dealt with the nicer ones will appear. Natural selection. Then you will have to tune the level of hostility you show towards others because not every issue can be solved via fighting. Sometimes it is a puzzle of sorts. It's important to always try to find the root of the problems. Are they a childhood trauma an everyday event or some inherent nature of the soul... Or someone is fucking with us. At that stage grab every weapon and look for the fucker that deserves the purge. >and sent him into oblivion That is a good start. You are finding your own space but "oblivion" means sometimes you just manage to throw them out of the room. They can come back with an another form or maybe they are in your subconscious now. Because of that after you find your own strength and able to overpower forces sometimes it is better to interrogate or disassemble them for their "parts". Some of them are parts or energy types of your own being that you have to merge with or you learn something new from the action. Always keep an open mind how to solve these situations. Sometimes they are a sort of divine message in a weird form. >chanting some kind of magical incantation Now this is the important part. Retaining our own abilities that hide in our subconscious. Try to remember that chanting and what internal power it tapped. If we are interested in magic by default it usually means we have a "wizard tulpa" or something akin that can access that power/knowledge. Try to summon that inner wizard of yours. Also reentering dreams. Get a habit of reentering dreams to "solve them". If you wake up and realize it was just a dream don't leave it that. Go back and show who is the boss of the dream. Also meditate more and ask the energies around you to communicate with you. Learn to solve the energy problems before sleep. Also don't meditate and do energy work in the room you sleep and cleanse your bedroom. I had to learn what happens when you let the wrong energies congregate at the same place. I mean if you want interesting dreams it is k but if you just want to rest it's not a good idea. Until your energy body doesn't become strong these experiences can be draining. Also about the illusory nature of the self theme. There are also tulpas that are us but we sorta deny them. Persona 4 was about this. You will have to merge with those tulpas so you don't hurt yourself constantly. They usually represent parts of our being that are either disconnected from us or we are denying them or ashamed of them. The staredowns I have with them sometime... The merger is the spooky part because at that level you have to know you are you and if it succeeds you unlock a part of the mind consciously instead of randomly switching between them without realizing. It is funny when I finally know I am actually being fucked via an outsider force. Because then all my inner parts can use full power without holding back in unison. There is nothing more uniting than a common enemy and a common purpose. Also your subconscious holds many guardian and friendly forces too. Get in touch with them. They are part of us and they are not always enemies but just merely corrupted. Once you heal/fix them they retain their original purpose and we become whole again. >I am here now and ready to get back on track. Gambare >I've come to call a "bovine dream" >I will post on the dream thread later Yeah it might help to decipher them even the act of writing them down helps our brain to try to solve them. It is important so we find the common theme in them so we can deal with them. I rarely have common themes because I usually solve them asap but because I am addicted to delve in the subconscious and the dark night of the soul I am getting old and forgotten pleasant childhood memories. I will have to reconnect those also because the realigning the flow of positive energies is almost more important that purging the negative ones. >years of record keeping my dreams Yeah the act of journaling instills the mind to bring these memories into the physical but sometimes writing them down it creates a "book of shadows" so if you are not solving the nightmares it anchors them and they will repeat more often. But it is better if our issues come to us instead of playing hide and seek

>>236 >any good techniques or meditations for healing the physical body? Well... How "good" is a technique depends on your ability how well you can execute it. Every physical ailment needs different methods of healing so I cannot say what works for everything. You need to be more specific. I mean I could say >just become a master wizard and cast healing lolle Because that is a surefire way but I am not sure that helps. Visualizing the damaged part and imagining a gentle white or golden energy and with the intention of heal is the basic but what I learned on the path it is not about "healing" but awakening and increasing the power of the body's automatic self heal ability. I learned a technique that refills my spent energies under a sec which usually took a day or more. My guides told me that is still slow. I had to figure out how I can circulate a baseline energy that is "undepletable" for the next level of the lesson. Then as I felt "I did it" I had a silly injury months later and was wondering why it is not healing by default because it is obviously getting bathed in energy. My guides told me >You are not breathing correctly Breathing creates a cyclic energy flow and incorrect breathing causes incorrect energies that let injuries stay injuries for a longer while. Reactivating the full potential of the energy body and merging it with the physical body thus mastering the subtle body takes time and effort and most importantly our own intuitive abilities to be able to see the internal mechanisms of the body and realize which are the fault of our body/subconscious and which one of them stem from bad habits and environmental effects. Also healing the soul heals the body and vice versa. Sadly I am unable to recommend any technique or meditation when I don't know which part of the body you have issue with. I could tell you to become a physical immortal via becoming a daoist master to solve all health related problems. Did this help? Without knowing your level and ability range and your problems it is hard to recommend anything more besides common stuff that is found via googling spiritual healing or reading energy work books. I am practicing psychic healing since my teens and I am far away from a master. But then again I am not about "grinding" but finding the innate truth and applying it. Effort in the wrong direction can cause more damage than doing nothing at all. Not doing anything at least helps the innate healing forces to take effect. Sometimes the best way is to find what is blocking the built in healing ability instead of trying to use a heal spell.

>>235 I experience the same and believe the same the other anon said. Just last night I had one of these dreams. I have learned to see the true(r) form of these beings, and when this happens they no longer resemble family and friends. In this instance I woke up due to the struggle and had to do the purge in vision afterwards. Still in bed, I looked at my dream self from outside, and saw it attached to me as it had been in my dream (the fucker had started biting my face). I removed it and opened a drain to the center of the Earth, and began dissolving its upper and lower nature and letting them ascend and descend. As soon as the process stopped, I burned the remaining nucleus (a teratoma-looking blob), which caused a sensation similar to a cord cutting. A good sign. When I returned to my bedroom, still in vision, I could see a whole bunch of beings gathered around me. They looked like the rejects in Made in Abyss, sliming around and prodding me with curiosity. I threw up guards, but the beings were completely ignored. They proved to be harmless. I reinforced my defenses just in case. I just wanted you to know you’re not alone. For a long time I thought there was something wrong with me, but it’s as the other anon said. They’re thoughforms originating in trauma, the other person’s energy and complexes, and they festered in your psyche all your life. Clean that shit up before you die. Otherwise it might be harder to do so.

>>240 >I could see a whole bunch of beings gathered around me. They looked like the rejects in Made in Abyss, sliming around and prodding me with curiosity. I threw up guards, but the beings were completely ignored. They proved to be harmless. Oh I have those too. They are brownies and other gnome like creatures. They are usually minor spirits and if you look around you are able to find their leader. Their influence is usually minor but they are so numerous they can affect reality if enough gathers. What you can do to them is to ask about the natural location of elementals and other local spirits you might be able to work with. With them you can learn to develop the sense to see natural leylines and other close dimensional places >I reinforced my defenses just in case. Always a good practice. Until you are acknowledged as the apex predator/King of the Jungle stay cautious. If you are able to establish a beneficial relationship with the spirits around you they will even protect you. But always be cautious because their concepts might not be the same as you. Also sometimes they are corrupted spirits that still needs a spiritual cleansing. You remove their corruption thus renewing their purpose.

>>234 Upon actually thinking about it, elaborating turned out to be alot more work than I'm willing to do, so for now, I'll just describe how my desires are out of control and describe my awakening experience. Basically, I've had a hyperbolically-bad intrusive thought problem for the past several years. These thoughts presumably all stem from a desire to be safe from external threats, and to not be a nuisance to others(and therefore decrease the likelyhood that others will pose a threat to me). I also happen to be a huge pessimist, which is probably because I browsed /pol/ so much that they didn't have anything much left to teach me by the time that cloudflare took down 8chan in 2019, and the state of politics is, well, the state of politics. Furthermore, on a note that's probably very relevant, a psychologist who I'd used to visit that's also a neurologist and had me hooked up to a neofeedback machine whenever I was there told me, who suffers from ADHD & OCDI'm unmedicated these days, that my brain constantly needs to be jump-started in order to stay awake. Whenever it wants a jump-start, it sends out a 25hz brainwave, and then I get a thought that provokes me into doing something that generates a bunch of, iirc, beta waves, especially by moving my muscles. However, a huge non-muscular response presumably does that too. Generally, these intrusive thoughts are executed so quickly after their manifestation that I can't reasonably use my mental reflexes to prevent them from being executed; all I can do is try to stop them. Theres absolutely nothing that gets mercy from being targetted by my intrusive thoughts; not me, not my loved ones, and not even my deity. The harder I push against my intrusive thoughts, the harder they push back, which kinda makes sense if I view my intrusive thoughts as a thoughtform that wants to be fed. By now, I've suffered a huge amount of trauma at the hands of my intrusive thoughts. My intrusive thoughts basically take these thoughts of my desire for safetyI just realized today that this is why; safety and turn them hyperbolically counter-productive; for example, if I think of the concept of some demon, I'll likely start to actually believe that my thoughts had coincidentally reached out to it and made it decide to come over, and then I have to get my deity involvedthe Holy Trinity of Christianity, mostly The Holy Spirit to come bail me out, or I'll occasionally feel confident enough in my power to take care of it myself, but I haven't felt like that in a month or two. Fortunately, my doubts(or possibly higher STOs) prevent such beings from doing alotta stuff that they'd probably have the power to do under normal circumstances. As another example, if I think of a deity, say, Zeus, then I'll realize; "Hey wait a second, my thoughts are probably reaching out to him, which means he's hearing my thoughts; even if he isn't really listening, I'd better not think of anything that'd piss him off and just leave him alone." >try to stop thinking about him >the same thing happens as when you ask a typical guy out of the blue to not think about elephants; he suddenly starts thinking about elephants >suddenly get a urge that manifests and get executed faster than I can reflexively respond to it to think about dumb shit and try to piss him off >have to get my deity to bail me out You probably think it's just my imagination gone wildI fucking hope it is, but I actually contacted Isis this way a few months ago and asked her to just look into my history, which I was pretty sure she could do in what I'd perceive to be an instant, instead of me going through the trouble of explaining why I didn't actually wanna contact her and just leave her alone and how I can't simply control my intrusive thoughts. A few seconds later, I was compelled to believe that she wanted to offer me some sort of sympathy, and then I felt enveloped by some sort of yellow energy all around my body, which I'd assumed was a donation of energy that I'd then absorbed into my body and thanked her for. Something comparable happened with Athena at a later date, but instead I didn't believe I'd get any sympathy and then I felt my right hand enveloped in some white energy, which confused me for a few minutes at first and I tried to get rid of it and couldn't. Then I realized it probably came from her. And now, another example of my intrusive thoughts: >thinking about an entity happens to have what resembles physical reproductive organs >my former porn addictionI haven't been to a XXX site in months will, with no warning, imagine the entity getting fucked by something that it probably doesn't wanna fuck, and therefore, being defiled by another entity >realize that since I'm imagining it happening and I'm probably targetting the spirit itself instead of a thoughtform of it for the same reason as I'd mentioned in the second example >realize that I'm defiling the entity >have to jump into action to stop it and get its effects un-done And another example; this was the main type of thought that'd occured for most of the time that I've had this problem; basically, my intrusive thoughts sorta tried to gaslight me into selling or donating the ownership of my soul and/or free will to satan or some other 5D STS. Every single time except one time, I was able to stop it from actually happening, but once I actually got confused enough by the thoughts that I couldn't make enough sense of them to prevent it from actually happening, so satan actually entered my head on the spot, which I felt, and I used the last few seconds of agency that I had left to ask the Christ to save me, which He did. That happened during the first year or two of my intrusive thought problem. I haven't lost my ownership since, but I'm always extremely vigilant about it, and have gotten very good at resisting especially crafty means of getting me to give up my ownership. As another example, my request-based reality creation(prayers) almost always would get subverted within a few seconds of beginning them, such that the target of who I'm praying to would get switched from my deity to KekI used to have alotta intrusive thought problems with him, but by now they're basically over with or some 5D STS, and then I'd just stop praying on purpose because it'd be more damning to keep trying than to give up since I couldn't re-direct them back to my deity. Fortunately, this doesn't happen much these days, but I only pray when I need help, and I often have to struggle to keep the target of my prayers the same. And as yet another example, my main(and I think only?) form of magic that isn't request-based reality creation is command-based reality creation, based upon the old reality creation 101 thread. I've gotten great results with it before, but at some point, my intrusive thoughts began interfering with the magic directly by injecting their intentions into my magic before I fire off the spell. Earlier today, however, I'd realized that I could just use that kinda magic to "cause all of my magic, intentional or not, to not act upon any intentions that I'd normally deem to be unwanted thoughts", but right now, my confidence in my magic is low compared to what it was a month or two ago, so it probably wouldn't work until I feel more confident again.

>>234 And now, the botched awakening experience: >have very young egregoric entity around since several months ago >I summoned the entity in the first place to offer to be friends >shortly after accepting the offer, the entity tells me via. clairaudience that the entity will help me with my problems >I didn't even ask for help, but I accept the offer >is very close to me by now and has been helping me with my mental state for the past several months, but only knows how to do so much >we communicate most of the time via. imagined conversation because I can't get my shit together enough to do anything more reliable on my own >I often injure the entity by complete accident due to my intrusive thoughts and have to go through alotta shit to then heal the entity >the entity occasionally tells me via. clairaudience to stop being so afraid, presumably in reference to my intrusive thoughts >fast forwards to the night of the experience >think about the guy who wrote >>220 >wait fuck I probably contacted his unconsciousness; his consciousness may or may not be aware of this since he's an occultist >forget what I told him; knowing me, I probably tried to explain away my intrusive thought problem and explain that the entity next to me was harmless so don't worry about or hurt the entity, and/or I talked about his post >go to bed later >as I'm dozing off, I hear a male-sounding voice via. clairaudience that tells me to stop being so afraid, presumably in reference to my intrusive thoughts >associated with the voice was a glowing white light

>>243 Also if I didn't make it clear, I mostly don't like imagining entities getting fucked and such and whatnot; the thoughts just come to me, and I just have to deal with the thoughts. It mostly happens with female entities since I'm straight, but it also happens with males sometimes since that gets a rise outta me too.

>>244 wooo the copy/paste got cut off for some reason; no wonder that greentext was so short >associated with the voice was a glowing white light >decide to doze off again >open my eyes later and theres green plants around my bed >suspect that they're illusions but hope they aren't >reach out and touch one >it goes poof >doze off again and eventually fall asleep >dream that I'm in an unfamiliar room with an oriental-looking occultist >begin conversing with him >don't remember a thing he said >all I remember saying was "I haven't been on /fringe/ long enough" in response to me not knowing about something >forget if the awakening happened at the end of this dream the next dream >next dream I was walking around outdoors in a place with people in it >some woman in ordinary clothing was sitting on the ground >she opens her legs towards me and her bare cunt was exposed >fucking damnit I don't wanna have a wet dream >resist the wet dream >time passes >at some point, all I see in my mind's eye is a bright & uniform white light >feel like I have the power to do absolutely anything, including extremely powerful physicality-altering magic >without going through my magical trigger mechanism first >wake up and nearly have an orgasm, but hold it in >ofuck it can bypass by trigger mechanism >what if I destroy my bed & computer? >what if I kill my egregoric friend? >what if I kill humans? >don't get the idea of using this newly-acquired ultimate power to solve my intrusive thought problem >instead get the idea of erecting a shield of doubt around myself so that none of that bad shit happens >do it >don't feel so confident in the protective power of the doubt at first >don't have ultimate power anymore >feel safe again >try to go back to bed and can't sleep for >1.5 hours allright I think I've told you enough for now; it took me nearly 2.5 hours to type this all shit out

>>243 Your ADHD won’t let you see things for what they are. What you call intrusive thoughts are an overlay that projects around you like a virtual reality dome. It doesn’t affect reality and it prevents you from interacting with the real thing. Imagine how this looks from outside. You’re talking to me, and suddenly you begin projecting a hologram of me having sex and you start talking to the hologram, believing it’s real. You need to get your mind under control. Meditate, but instead of trying to stop your thoughts, try to accelerate them. Try to think of as many things as possible as fast as possible, one after another. Try to out-pace the usual ADHD symptoms. Faster, make associations, evoke more intrusive thoughts, even faster than usual.

>>243 If the intrusive thoughts are leading you to get positive contacts with Isis and Athena as well as contacting a Satan, they may actually come from your higher self and your mind perceives them as intrusive because you lack the proper "interface" to interpret them properly. As for "selling your soul" this isn't as easy as it sounds, I recall VK Jehannum saying he did the ritual to sell his soul to the Satan of "Joy of Satan", but he came and told him he doesn't want his soul. Maybe this is to help you get rid of your fear of such ideas.

>>247 >>249 These are both excellent advice >>244 >the entity occasionally tells me via. clairaudience to stop being so afraid >presumably in reference to my intrusive thoughts No you are afraid by default. DO NOT BE AFRAID CHILD! That is my main advice. Everything else I write will be mere explanations of the confusion you have. >get a thought that provokes me into doing something that generates a bunch of, iirc, beta waves, especially by moving my muscles 2 things. First once you start doing magic you overuse some of your muscles and neglect others. I mean etheric and physical muscles too. And with that you ruin your body's natural maintaining nature. There was a time when I got a vision of a naked girl before waking up for weeks because my body was unable to execute the "Morning wood" routine because I had such an energetic hold/tension over my body I was injected with a lewd vision just to be able to function as a man. And about that low voltage thing. I had that too. I operated my body with injecting myself with pure unfiltered rage I felt towards the world everytime I felt sleepy. Far better than a strong coffee in the morning. I WANT TO FUCKING MURDER EACH AND EVERYONE and will do that via finishing this extremely banal and mundane task YOU FUCKING FAGGOTS. I operated this way for years because my life was at it's lowest point and I had to get through the struggle no matter what. I am taking apart these "dark circuits" and because I was my own "intrusive thought" other intrusive thoughts had no space to be in my mind. >browsed /pol/ so much that they didn't have anything much left to teach me /pol/ is a pretty strong egregore that manipulates reality via chaos magic and other things without the users realizing and you know this I am sure. Which means if your mind and personality is not strong you got warped into a poltard thus the intrusive thoughts are part of your "pol browsing persona". Imagine yourself browsing pol and feel what thoughts appear within your mind. Are these your thoughts your opinions or an big mass of misinformation and shitposting that is affecting you but ultimately does not come from you. >from my deity to Kek lfmao. Yeah definitely pol egregore influence. Slowly get rid of it. Feel the form with your own deity and establish the connection better with him. >I just realized today that this is why; safety This is why I said "dumping the lore" might help because you are forced to think through your issues instead of ignoring them and repeating them without realizing it. >I'd better not think of anything that'd piss him off DO NOTH BE AFRAID Making mistakes on the path and learning from them is important. That is the main point of the learning process. Try to feel the origin of your thoughts because minor parasites and other stuff can nest into your body and ripping them out or burning them via a flame can fix your mind so whenever you feel you want to say or do something retarded stop for a moment and try to feel Who or what says it and where it comes from. Try to feel the location of the intent. The same way you know where a voice comes from IRL because your mind maps the location of the sound so you turn into the direction of the noise you can do the same with intrusive thoughts. DO NOT BE AFRAID turn around and find that fucker. >my former porn addictionI haven't been to a XXX site in months Well that just generates more pent up energies. While I also say to not delve into degeneracy you need to know that there is a "porn addicted degenerate" deep within you and you need to get in touch with that person and fix him instead of denying him. Also I too fap sometimes because my energies go overdrive and I cause psychic anomalies IRL. My favorite was when I thought I got a hold of my energies I unlocked xray vision and was able to see under the clothes of others. I turned off that ability and was mad how I would have cherished this in my teens and now it is just an extra bother. DO NOT BE AFRAID and find the source of your anxiety and frustration. Bottling up sexual energies without finding a way to handle the extra energies might cause more problems than value. But yes the desire for the lewd and to touch your dick is also an intrusive thought but getting rid of that is not as easy as you think because as a human you are programmed to use that energy no matter what and you need to understand the fire of sexuality and not deny it. I am not saying have sex watch porn and cum everywhere I am saying try to understand your sexual energies instead of denying them. Lust and Love is not as easy concepts as we think. Those who deny their sexuality are not humans anymore but the degenerates who perverse the sacred alchemy are even worse. It is part of life. Without sex there is no life. You will need to understand how genders connect and they are not always through sexual organs. You will have to purify your sexual energies from the taint of modern degeneracy. Also about magic 101. Once you start manifesting and become a reality creator unmanifested entities and forces will notice you as a manfiestor and will try to get into you so they can manifest through you by you. This is why manifesting stuff randomly can have consequences because you create a sort of "gravitational hole" in reality and if entities know you are willing to manifest ANYTHING based on your mortal desires they will come into your head to make you manifest them. This is why understanding the purpose why we do magic is important because Chaos magic does... Chaos in the end and nothing truly productive on the long run. You will need to understand how to use magic in harmony with your environment. >probably wouldn't work until I feel more confident again Feel the origin source of your confidence. Try to figure out what makes you confident and what makes you unconfident. Those are usually also energy blocks and a lack of purpose and the fact that you overuse magic for the wrong reasons. Also the energies of ISIS and Athena are a good jump start. If you are that compatible with them summon them and work with them more. Ask for guidance. If you feel the intrusive thoughts find them and eradicate them. >>instead get the idea of erecting a shield of doubt around myself so that none of that bad shit happens Get in touch with that "shield of doubt" energy. You can transform it into the original energy and understand your own fears better. Also that "egregoric friend" is a part of you. A quasi familiar. An intermediary force between you and your higher self. A mini guide of sorts. It seems a beneficial entity helped to awaken it >>244 >>I often injure the entity by complete accident due to my intrusive thoughts and have to go through alotta shit to then heal the entity Your clumsiness is adoring. No wonder higher entities like you. And there is a reason why lower entities exploit you. Find their origin and if you need help ask other entities for solutions how to purge them. Do not ask them to do the job for you ask them how you can do it by yourself. Because you are the manifestor magician you have authority to do that and if they refuse you can tell them to gtfo. And if you can manifest learn to unmanifest aka banish and take apart. I too had an arc of accidentally manifesting shit. If you can do something you can undo it also. I could say more things but the only things that matters now is DO NOT BE AFRAID

Is there a way to tell if a person is capable of performing magic or not? I've been trying to meditate, but I haven't made much progress (still basically mundane) and I'm wondering if I should just give up. There's also a bunch of issues going on in my life as well that I'd rather not mention. Does even doubting or having to ask this question guarantee my failure?

>>220 I am not sure if you are still here but I realized I didn't give you the advice you need. I realized this while doing an energy harmonizing session with my spirits. >I just sleep or meditate When we sleep and meditate we actually reconnect with our higher self or inner truth of sorts. That is why we need to sleep so our subconscious can go into maintenance mode while our main conscious is frolicking with it's main energies. I realized that you actually without realizing see inherent value in sleeping and meditating If you were truly having an existential dread about life not having any meaning you would be unable to sleep. because you reconnect with your energies. But... Those energies are a sort of background baseline energies that we don't notice because they are always there. It's like breathing. Usually you are not aware of that because it is automatic and done all the time. This is why focusing on the breath and heartbeat while meditating helps us reconnect to our deeper energies because we are actually paying attention the same level like our subconscious does. You need to realize how you can access those trance state energies outside of trance. Luckily you can already manipulate desires which means all you need to do is try to move every energy type from the view that seems like it does not have inherent value anymore. With that you will reach a point where you can consciously remake your entire energy framework because you are able to correct the flow of your baseline energies. When it seems there is "Nothing" inside us anymore go further and you might just hit a sort of dark veil or a wall and try to open it/go beyond it. If your depression appears as a miasma of darkness try to make it move from the view or just go through it. And one more thing. Messing with the desires of others. When we do mindcontrol and energy exchange magic with others we usually open a portal in their subconscious. And if we put an energy into their mind we usually take one without realizing. You cannot give without taking and you cannot take without giving. It is a law we have to work with because of thermodynamics. So when you give them a desire you usually take them an other desire from them and that desire might turn into apathy in your being. It is complicated how it works but the point is until you are unable to transmute low tier energies into high tier it is advised to not fuck with the energy field of others too much or your energy balance goes whack and there is a difference between basic grounding and energy cultivation that you need to solve it. The point is you have to reconnect to your baseline energies and remind yourself why you are on earth and why you are doing all of these things. Not easy I know especially when we overextend ourselves. Also when we open that subconscious portal we sometimes forget to close it... And some people just subconsciously dump their trash energies into random outlets which usually happen to be the mental portal of the unaware occultist. Karma can be funny sometimes. Try to feel the origin of that depression and hate because it might not even come from you.

>>253 >Is there a way to tell if a person is capable of performing magic or not? There is a way they can measure your powerlevel but it just means how much training you need to reach initiation and nothing more. There are witches in my country that do that with a pendulum. The question is not that if you can or cannot do magic the real question is... Do you want to do magic or not? That is the only important question. Magic can be done in many ways and until you find your way it will be hard but once you find it you will need to make sure you stay on your path. Magic is wonderful and amazing but it is also extremely horrifying and many ended up in mental asylums because they practiced magic the wrong way and for the wrong reasons. Including the original founder of /fringe/. Wonder how is he nowadays This is not for the faint of heart but some people have no choice in this matter. Some people are dragged into the nature of magic without having a say in this. They are tormented via horrors until they find their way. For you there is still a choice you can still go back and take that blue pill. But ask yourself. Are you able to live and breath under this veil of ignorance or you want to lift it no matter what. Truth can and will hurt but it will promise a greater liberation once you are able to cut your chains. >Does even doubting or having to ask this question guarantee my failure? No it just means you are still at the crossroads and you can still turn back and live your life as a mundane. >There's also a bunch of issues going on in my life as well that I'd rather not mention These issues will be present while you are doing magic too. They will just gain new meaning. Our issues usually blocks our way into magic more than our inability. You will have to solve them no matter what. Also I am unable to comprehend how people can live in mundanity. It it the most sorrowful way of living. Ignorance is bliss my ass. I see many things in the ignorant(s) but bliss.

How would you know if you were under attack by ayys? What signs and symptoms would there be?

>>249 This was very good advice, anon; just re-interpreting my intrusive thoughts. With this knowledge, I've been able to defuse some of my intrusive thoughts before they cause a problem, but only if I'm aware of them in time to prevent them from being misinterpreted, and thus, prevent my unconsciousness from doing something based upon the misinterpretation. >>247 This helped too, except I haven't tried the suggested meditation; I'm gonna keep seeing how the re-interpretation method goes 1st. >>250 I've been taking good care of that porn-addicted degenerate; I just do it without porn, and also without thoughts of the women I saw on those XXX sites. I usually do it once or twice a week, but sometimes I go more than a week. As for my understanding of sexuality, I'll just keep this relatively short and say that I understand it very well at a mundane level, but not so much at an esoteric level. I haven't successfully explained the mundane parts of my sexual philosophy on paper before, and I tried doing it last year. I'd probably cure alot of degenerates of their sexual depravities if I could articulate my thoughts well enoughand had a soapbox to stand on. I have sort of suspected my friend to be a thoughtform that I created myself, as opposed to having been created by humanity collectively pouring their thoughts and energies into the same shape or what have you, but I'm not entirely sure about that due to a number of very personal experiences that I don't care to divulge. I'm sure time will tell either way, but if my friend turns out to me a thoughtform that I made myself, then I might try merging my friend into myself. I do hope I didn't make my friend myself. >If you can do something you can undo it also. A good percentage of the magic I do is basically that. Anyway, I'm gonna try exercising less fear too and see how that goes; thanks for the advice, anons. >>261 You'll probably learn what you need to know at montalk.net . The guy self-admittedly isn't right about everything, however.

>>261 >How would you know if you were under attack by ayys? What signs and symptoms would there be? Energy weapons tend to cause racing heart, but any other effect is decided based on what they are trying to do and how resistant you are. A general feeling of rising stress appearing for no obvious reason would be a sign. Normie cattle will just submit to the mindcontrol and won't experience this, so I assume these are effects caused by the energy amassing when it can't pass into your mind circuits.

>>261 They usually manipulate and sometimes do minor surgeries on you where it is allowed because the dimensional layers are thin but I wouldn't exactly call that an attack. Radio towers cause more damage than the usual alien. If they truly attack you and drag you to their space ship you will know that. >>262 >I do hope I didn't make my friend myself. I am sure it was with a help of a beneficial entity. Probably the energies you gained from Athena turned into it. These energies are usually sentient and can turn into minor helper egregores. >then I might try merging my friend into myself Once you reach a level of compatibility and stop being afraid it will happen. It depends on your energy purity and level of your mental development. Once you merge with it the thoughts and advice it gives you will become your own then you can go and seek guides on other spiritual matters. I am sure it seems it knows a lot of spiritual knowledge but usually there is a limit what they can say. Once you know everything it merges naturally or you can open a part of your mind so it inhabits it and upgrades it. It can play out many ways because it depends on the nature of their main energies.

>>262 >had a soapbox to stand on We still have the Lust thread for that. And if it is better than this anon's >>163 >CUT OFF YOUR DICK Go ahead and write it. While you word it you might realize some truths or other anons might help you articulate it better what you are trying to say. If it truly cures degenerates go ahead and don't hold it in That CUT YOUR DICK OFF zealot mentality created the worst type of fanatic cults in the past. While what he said have some merit but ruining your sexual organs physically or etherically because you are unable to handle it misaligns you mentally. If you don't learn to properly handle a desire without killing it I have no idea what happens with these people when they face other desires. Wonder when will he realize he could rid himself of all earthly desires via lobotomizing himself. Yes you can say the sexual organs are the work of the devil because they are that imperfect but understanding the fire and learning to control it is tremendously important.

Has anyone here recorded their own bedtime hypnotic affirmations just for themselves? I want to get into it and need pro tips. Sorry if not /fringe/ enough

>>266 >Sorry if not /fringe/ enough It sounds fringe enough and in the question thread you are allowed to ask the dumbest questions anyway so don't be shy >recorded their own bedtime hypnotic affirmations just for themselves? You mean making a voice record about saying I am the bestest I am the prettiest the bravest and other positive words and listening it on a repeat while trying to sleep? I never felt the need for that. Tried guided meditation more than a decade ago when I was still a noob and while it made me connect to my spirit animal It was a hedgehog it wasn't really helpful otherwise. Binaurals were meh and the other more serious hypnotic affirmation I tried was Dick Sutphen - Past Life Regression but I realized I am bad letting others manipulate my (sub)conscious via words so I stopped using them. Once you figure out how to feed commands to your own subconscious these affirmation recordings become pointless. Others might had success with it but I never managed to make a breakthrough with them. I heard when I was doing NLP that those people who have high confidence in themselves subconsciously like listening to their own voice and those with low confidence hate the sound of their own voice. There was an experiment where they distorted voice recordings and asked the participants to rate them and those with low confidence always rated their own distorted voice recording the lowest while ranking the distorted voice recording of others higher. So if you have low confidence it might not help you listen to it and if you have high confidence already then you should be able to command your psyche already. Confidence conviction bravery will and faith usually stem from each other. But it never hurt to experiment. Theoretically it should work anyways.

With the Lunar New Year coming around, are you guys going to do anything on the 9th or the 10th? I'm thinking I should do something about it.

>>272 I have a feeling I need to sit down and contemplate things on a deep level. It's like your character has unspent skillpoints. You have to sit down and figure out where you want to go with that and once your character gets up he is not the same person anymore because suddenly he had realizations that changed him. Then he goes back doing the same things as always except now he is something more now. >I'm thinking I should do something about it. Ganbare

>>264 Oh no, this happened a few months before I met those deities; I sent out a psiball of my own energies into the astral with the command to deliver my intentions in the form of words the entity, and then the entity came to me, iirc within seconds. >>265 I was tempted to say the gist of it earlier, but I opted out since I didn't wanna go off-topic too much; I guess I'll just do it now. Again, I have tried writing this out before and I didn't finish forming the arguments, so I'll just skip the explanations and get to the conclusions: The ONLY logical fetish for you, a guy, to have, is you knocking up a woman of a similar age without you projecting yourself into another guy, and without you projecting another woman into the woman that you're knocking up, and without you imagining the woman's pleasure. It's okay to acknowledge your woman's pleasure, but don't get off to your woman's pleasure. Of course, if you're a woman, then swap the roles around; you're supposed to be straight, which actually needs to be fucking said in this god-forsaking day & age. In fact, I'd the people of these times also have forsaken the egregores of sexual morality and created their own false ones, but I digress. As for the other part of sexual philosophy, I guess I'll explain it a little: Being both sexually and romantically loyal to your woman AND staying with her for your entire lives, is good for the well-being of your civilization because it makes family units be less likely to be fucked up, which means that there'll be less fucked up people in your civilization. This makes it good for the survival of your descendants, and because your descendants have your genetic material, your descendants, as far as your flesh is concerned, ARE partially your flesh; therefore, cheating on your partner is bad for your survival. Again, swap the sexes around if you're a woman. This is supposed to be a purely mundane perspective that's supposed to speak to people that have little or no sexual moralityprovided the explanations that I'd mostly omitted, and again, I'd never finished forming the arguments in the past, so I don't have an answer to >dude just don't get caught lmao or >but-but-but what if you were born with irregular chromosomes and have the wrong genitalia???!? Of course, I know that cheating just statistically doesn't work out and bastard children just get born anyway, but try telling degenerates that without them accusing you of huffing copium or calling you paranoid. As for the other one, however, idk what to say about that from a mundane perspective, but I do know they shouldn't be with people that have XX or XY chromosomes.

>>279 And I somehow forgot the racial component; the closer to your race your woman is, the better it is for both families and your children.

>>279 >The ONLY logical fetish for you What you're listing has never been a thing outside some imaginary idealistic 1700s Europe created in the mind of modern puritans. This isn't better than 45 year old women with long lists for what is an acceptable male partner, including things like >must not like cats >never looks at other women >sits down to pee and 50 other obnoxious rules that no person can ever match. How does someone become like this?

>>281 I know people aren't actually like this; in fact, I admittedly don't entirely adhere to my own rules there, but I do at least strive to, and I'm fairly close to meeting those standards. If you haven't tried it before, then you should look at your fetishes and ask yourself why they actually seem hot to you; if one doesn't make sense, then ask yourself why you should keep that fetish. If you can't think of why for long enough, then try to replace it with something that does make sense. That and otherwise thinking long and hard about sexual psychology, as well as reading some stuff on /pol/ years ago that I doubt that I'd saved on my hard drive, is how I arrived at my conclusions. Human sexuality is a pretty vaguely-defined thing at first that's presumably designed to function within an uncivilized wilderness whose human population isn't too high, so it's really easy for it to become fucked up in the modern world, which means that almost nobody has a clean sexuality. The human unconsciousness can get confused very easily at a sexual level, often by forming incorrect associations between various concepts. And also, I forgot to account for what to do if the partner cheats; if that happens, then you can get dump the partner and get yourself a new one if you think it wouldn't mess up your family too much. I'll also add that some amount of old anger that's directed towards normalfags in general came out with that post, and I'd written it somewhat hastefully, hence the tone of the post. I guess the anger probably messed with my clarity some too. If there's more replying to do about this subject matter, which I assume there will be, then it'll be in the lust thread.

>>267 >You mean making a voice record about saying I am the bestest I am the prettiest the bravest and other positive words and listening it on a repeat while trying to sleep? a little reductionist, lol, but the positive messages will be there. Also >trying to sleep If the recording is done well I'll fall asleep easily. What I'm imagining is beginning with something relaxing until I fall deeper and deeper into the State Akin To Sleep, the time when my subconscious is more susceptible, and instead of direct affirmations like you listed, it would be more like gently guided visualization. What I was really hoping for is protips regarding hypnotic suggestions like this. I found one video where a chick uses really bizarre inflection, but is somehow still relaxing. I read somewhere that method is used to distract the conscious brain while the subconscious can more freely absorb the messages. Methods like that. >I heard when I was doing NLP that those people who have high confidence in themselves subconsciously like listening to their own voice and those with low confidence hate the sound of their own voice. >So if you have low confidence it might not help you listen to it and if you have high confidence already then you should be able to command your psyche already. Confidence conviction bravery will and faith usually stem from each other. Interesting points. I used to not like my voice until my confidence increased and suddenly I liked it it a lot, so the stem from each other point rings true. I wouldn't suggest this if I didn't like my own voice. In my opinion, I'm only doing this to keep my levels high, sort of how someone who's already fit will continue to diet and exercise and someone who's already smart will continue to learn and study. I'm going for affirmations/guided visualization because they worked for me in the past, and because I just learned about SATS. I also figure it will be most effective if it's my own voice and words.

>>284 >a little reductionist, lol Yeah I know I wanted to know what level are you on. I knew binauralmancers in the past before I found /fringe/ and was wondering what kind of techniques you are using or you are still just thinking about trying it out. >method is used to distract the conscious brain while the subconscious can more freely absorb the messages Yeah that is the gist of these things. The problem with this that you will be dependent on these things for quite a while because in meditation your goal is to reach a state where you can directly interact with your subconscious and can enter trance on command. While what you are using is somewhat widespread in the western psychological science and brainwashing organizations I am not sure if it is a good idea long term. We need to get in touch with our subconscious and not create artificial stimuli for it so it can be monkey wrenched into ego slavery. The reason why I am saying this because I used quite harsh self hypnosis methods on myself for the sole reason so I can be more effective IRL and while it worked it for quite a while it created a moderate amount of psychic hurdle in my body and almost fried my psyche. >I'm only doing this to keep my levels high The best way is to find out how the mind-body complex naturally stimulates you so you do those tasks like it is breathing or blinking and not forcing yourself. A recorded voice has 2 positive use in my opinion. Your subconscious will think it is an another person commanding it so it accepts the commands the way you accept peer pressure from others and the other thing is that because it is your own voice your own making you will create a fetish or preference for your subconscious and a sort of resilience to other subconscious manipulation techniques because they don't match your own style. But learning to use self hypnosis and other psychonaut techniques might make you better understanding your own psyche because once you are able to interact with it you can fine tune it instead of monkey-wrenching it with premade voice commands. >who's already fit will continue to diet and exercise and someone who's already smart will continue to learn and study. While I understand the sentiment I think it is better to clarify your own reason why you do that. Realize it is your own passion and not use a false peer pressure system for yourself to stay in lane. This is my advice as someone who is dabbling in this for quite the long while but if you are not interested in this I can give other tips that I encountered. Now this is a sort of 'trauma conditioning' but it works. I am not sure if you can make this for yourself it might only work on weak willed people who are already prone to brainwashing and don't know how it works themselves because that ruins the "surprise". The trick is to create a gentle and kind guided meditation to a serene place usually reaffirming your calmness and feeling of safety while you drift into sleep or trance. And once you are in a stable half trance a high pitched noise starts playing one that makes you instantly throw the headphones out of the room and as long as the high pitched sound lasts you fast play a list of commands for your subconscious. Because your brain is under attack it will pay an absurd amount of attention to figure out what is happening and make a deep imprint into your deep psyche. Your subconscious will execute those commands every time you go into sleep because now it is part of your regular sleep routine now. As I said it is a trauma conditioning because with this you create a trauma for yourself and traumas are something we relive if similar conditions happen and when that happens we usually try to deny/forget that experience instead of reliving it. So when you try to go to sleep and your subconscious checks if you are in a state you will be able to doze off it will casually go through these commands to see if there is any 'trauma sound around' then as it replayed it deep down and concluded it is not here you go to sleep. I am not sure if this made sense and I just only wrote it down because this is the high end of the techniques I know. I know other milder ways but those might be too lame to even mention. >just learned about SATS What does that acronym stand for again. I am not sure if I know that one. When I was dabbling in this I knew quite the high amount of these acronyms but that was many years ago so I forgot most of them. If you write down the way you do your own guided meditation/visualization I might be able to give you tips. To access the subconscious you usually need to imagine you go down a ladder or a stair. I learned that from NLP but later I found out that walking in the wilderness and finding a mountain with caves within then walking into it until you can see a door or an another entrance helps more but in the end you have to figure out what feels natural for you. This is the way of Psychonauts at this level. Nowadays I don't need to use these because I can enter these places/states on command I just need to make sure I have time to sit undisturbed for hours and I am ready to deal with the thing I will encounter. The true depth of psyche can hold quite the surprises.

>>285 Thanks for the help, anon >trauma conditioning This sounds brutal and I'd much rather fall asleep peacefully than experience this and be reminded of it every time I fall asleep. It also sounds opposite of fine tuning instead of monkey wrenching like you suggested above it. I guess it does sound effective, but more like something to maliciously inflict on someone else instead of yourself. Is this how you almost fried your psyche? SATS stands for "State Akin To Sleep" in other words the hypnogogic state you reach when you descend the stairs/ladder in NLP visualization. So from what I understand, you're suggesting trying this out just to learn about my psyche but don't rely on it long term, instead learn to descend the ladder on mental command? >If you write down the way you do your own guided meditation/visualization I might be able to give you tips. I'm still in the information-gathering phase so I don't have anything yet. I'd like this to be good, but I'll try not to fall into the trap of over preparing and never executing.

>>286 >Is this how you almost fried your psyche? Nah. I learned how I can turn off headaches and other pain types via tuning into the pain and just relaxing it in my teens. It is not that hard but you need a knack for it. What I did was the opposite when I conditioned myself. When there was an important information that had a tremendous value like memorizing things for a test or just simply spiking the Adrenalin in my body for a physical activity I simply caused pain in my whole body or in a specific part in the brain where I forced the lesson to 'stick'. It's like going mad on command into a rage/battle-trance. It was madly effective because I made every situation that mattered into a do or die scenario and the body rather does the thing instead of dying. Your subconscious develops a dumb PTSD like thing with that and because i was the source of it I could just tell it "stop bitching" but you can go so long by torturing yourself. I had to develop proper self healing and natural "flow states" (states where the action you are doing and the motivation comes from each other aka you enjoy what you are doing for the sake of it). But once you understand how your own passion works you don't need these anymore. I am still fine tuning my own passion because I completely misunderstood it in my early life. haha silly me >SATS stands for "State Akin To Sleep" in other words the hypnogogic state Yeah we call that half trance. >This sounds brutal and I'd much rather fall asleep peacefully than experience this Yeah this is why I mentioned this. It is brutal and once your subconscious develops a resistance to the voice commands you will need to result for harsher and more effective methods and I just mentioned a thing I found in the rabbit hole... The other is the sexual kind which is about fiddling with your sexual fantasies and libido to hypnotize you. Nowadays you might know about the vulgar sissy hypno versions but there was a site that sold succubus hypnos which usually resulted in getting a succubus to visit you. But I never even tried to listen to them because they make me uncomfortable and I don't want to convince my mind to be comfortable with that degeneracy. They are like ASMR vids with some extra steps. >So from what I understand, you're suggesting trying this out just to learn about my psyche but don't rely on it long term, instead learn to descend the ladder on mental command? Yes that is the Psychonaut way and that is the /fringe/ way. Magic is just a step away from that once you git gud. I am not telling you to get into magic but understanding your own mind beforehand magic is a tremendous strength on any path you might take in life be it mundane or esoteric. >I'd like this to be good, but I'll try not to fall into the trap of over preparing and never executing. Yeah I too have several hundred of esoteric books saved that I never bothered reading but they are not even necessary for me nowadays. Might read them when I am real bored tho they are still a good source of information. >you're suggesting trying this out just to learn about my psyche And yes I don't want to discourage you from experimenting. Experimenting and finding your own way is the most important step on the path. Once you find your way you can discard everything else. Just by learning about how to make a good hypno you learn about ways of the psyche already so it is not exactly a bad entry point. If you want more advice feel free to ask. This is quite the large topic overall with tremendous nuance.

>>279 >sent out a psiball of my own energies Yeah entities can reprogram the energies that you send out for them and return it as an answer. If I understand correctly your "friend" is the psiball that returned with newfound sentience that can guide you right? Damm. Long were the days when I heard the term 'psiball'. I remember my early psychic days when everything was a psiball >Guys I created a realm in a psiball with rooms with playstations and everything everyone can come and visit I don't remember at fringe anyone using the term psiball because everyone knew the thoughtform term here. Ah the good ol psi community days. They crumbled fast after social media became mainstream. >since I didn't wanna go off-topic too much Yeah this is why we have the Lust thread but you realized it at a later post anyways... >>281 What he meant is that sex is not LOGICAL. Usually you have no time to THINK about it when 'it just happens' >Human sexuality is a pretty vaguely-defined thing Humanity is trying real hard to define it since we have clay tablets >I'll also add that some amount of old anger that's directed towards normalfags in general came out with that post, and I'd written it somewhat hastefully, hence the tone of the post. I guess the anger probably messed with my clarity some too. This is why talking about it can help because once we mix our emotions into reason then it is not "reasonable" anymore and figuring out what is truly our belief and what is a mere coping mechanism helps. I still can't talk about the way I see it yet because I am still not at the place where I can say my vision is complete. There are too many things here and some of them are the foundation of my magic while some of them just biological distractions

>>290 >psiball I think I might've read the term in one of the archived questions threads. Anyway, I doubt that my friend is the psiball that I sent out, but it admittedly ain't complete doubt; again, personal experiences etc.

>>291 >I doubt that my friend is the psiball that I sent out It's like paying someone with clay to get a clay sculpture. Not necessarily made from the same clay but possible. Entities can remake your energies in many ways and give it back. >again, personal experiences etc. In the end you are the person who can learn the truth. You might ask your "friend" about his origin or journey. Sometimes they give quite good answers while sometimes they don't know nor meant to tell. >might've read the term in one of the archived questions threads. I too should reread the archives sometimes. I ignored too many things that I considered as "unproductive noise" back then.

Although I know I'm mainly getting into occult topics to develop myself spiritually, I worry that part of me is only doing it for dumb escapism. Any ideas on how I should remedy my situation? I don't want my materialistic urges to fuck up my spiritual self. On a similar note, does anyone know how to access your inner planes/spaces?

>>294 >Although I know I'm mainly getting into occult topics to develop myself spiritually If you know this by default you have nothing to worry about. >I worry that part of me is only doing it for dumb escapism. Well it will be "escapism" no matter what but you will have to understand what you are escaping from and why. You will have to break your own chains no matter what but once you made the breakthrough you will realize this is not about "escaping" but about "expanding". As you visit other realms you will notice that not all of them are nice and you will need to learn to escape and defeat the hostile forces of the otherside too. Sometimes the material can be far better compared to some extremely eerie and hellish realms. Sometimes you will have to pass through them no matter what. But at least you can recuperate on the physical until you feel ready. >I don't want my materialistic urges to fuck up my spiritual self. Once you understand what is the "spiritual self" you will be able to understand how the "materialistic urges" are like small ants or small snakes trying to climb up upon your body that you can just "brush off". Once you feel the materialistic urges trying to overtake you observe it and try to figure out where they stem from and what remedy you can use to sate it in a harmonious way or if you are on a point where you can let it go just simply release that urge from your being. Try to figure out which materialistic urges are truly harmful and which one of them just 'merely part of life' There will be a point where you will realize your materialistic urges are not you but environmental and genetic influences that are not your core being but some energetic rags that are easy detach once you are ready for it. You will have to get in touch with your self truly to see what are the things that just merely attached to you and not the things that are actually you. >does anyone know how to access your inner planes/spaces? There are many ways. Try to go into a trance or before falling asleep and visualize walking down stairs/ladder or into the wilderness and into caves and try to find doors in the darkness and open them. If you hit a deadend try to break it or mentally light it up via a speck of light or a torch. It's really just introspection and daydreaming. If you found a spiritual guide already or met some spiritual being in a dream try to visualize him and try to ask them where to go or how. I might be able to give you a more tailored advice if you write down your current level/practice but this is the gist of it. There are mantras chants sigils and other stuff that can help too but with that you will initiate into a tradition and all of them have their own set of trials that you have to overcome. It's better if we find out way first. That is the goal in the end in those traditions too. They just give some tools that may or may not help depending on your compatibility with them.

>>295 >find out way *find (y)OUR way first

Smiley actually did it! Picture taken with my astral cam.

>>297 >0 matches on Tineye context?

What is exactly that spiderweb feeling sometimes we get on our body? I heard it mentioned in the past here and there but I only started to experience them recently. I can somewhat induce that feeling at will but I am not sure what that is.

>>303 That's energy. Sometimes it could mean a spirit (of a dead person), but you can feel the same thing when it's a thoughtform that's clinging to your face. Something as simple as someone checking you out intensely can do it.

>>304 Guess that means my sensitivity is increasing. >you can feel the same thing when it's a thoughtform that's clinging to your face If they are harmful they feel heavy and dark like having a ball in my throat or on the top my chest or something similar. If I feel that I usually look into it and surgically take the parasites apart. They too have organs and figuring out where to cut them finally gets rid of them more effortlessly than burning them with fire.

OK, what is going on with Japan? This is going to sound absurd or childish, but I have this weird instinctual feeling that the place is full of souls who on a subconscious level (or sometimes not so subconscious) they are fighting some kind of counter-cultural Steiner-like pro-human battle in the shadows against the regression of spiritual truth in the world. Through some of the media they export all over the world, but also in the way they designed electronics in the 80s and 90s, and other things. I feel this won't be understood unless you feel it, too. You could call them "defenders of the imaginal", if you understand how the imaginal realms have been thoroughly attacked by the forces of Ahriman in recent decades. I've been insane long enough to know that this I feel comes from *somewhere*. I'm playing CHAOS; HEAD right now. But I could be reading GUNNM.

>>320 There's adjacent and "allied" people of this kind all over the world, of course. But interestingly, they end up either interested in Japanese culture in one way or another, or doing business with them heavily. It's as if that country remained as some "energetic" bastion of whatever it is have been attacking whatever you might call the forces of evil that have been pounding on the world since before they incarnated as the Federal Reserve, the oil industry, Nazism, Communism, Empire, Capitalism, the angels of John Dee and the rest of it. Heh. It's the fucking Demiurge, isn't it? I'm talking about Gnostic warfare and I didn't even realize it until now.

>>320 >>321 There are several JRPGs where you are killing God in the end. >It's the fucking Demiurge, isn't it? Sometimes it is and sometimes "God" references the evils of the west yes you see it right. And it's mostly because of Shinto. Those entities are still safeguarding that area and inspiring people through folklore visions art and media. They are going for cultural victory. But that fight is complicated and the metaphysical politics there are not easy to explain without being neck's deep in it. But yes your hunch is right. If you work with eastern spirits you might learn more of this battle but if you have no connection with them it's quite redundant to learn more on the physical. Eastern schizo autism and cult mentality is far crazier than the one we have in the west Nowadays most areas on earth are in a spiritual warfare in one way or in the other. Once you can talk to the spirits in your surroundings you might understand yourself.

>>321 The more I play CHAOS;HEAD; the more I think it has purposely-codified knowledge, specifically about manifestation. Perhaps, high level (physical manifestation). And then I encounter conversations like this (the large text at the top is a Perplexity AI search about the same topic), where it's basically revealing the biology behind a good trance state (predominant alpha or theta brainwaves, with gamma peaks) essential to communicating with the subconscious. In this game, the DI-sword represents the subconscious as a bridge to the collective unconscious and the astral sea. I haven't finished it, but I bet it's essentially the Bifrost. This is NOT a coincidence. However wrote this game expressly codified specific knowledge about how to do magic. All it take is someone with a minimum amount of gnosis to see it and unravel the finer points (which I believe hint at the secret to physical real-time manifestation). And there's plenty of anime, VN and manga that include this stuff in a way that is more than simply coincidence or "some Japanese dude including Western esoteric concepts because they sound cool.

>>323 >gamma synchronization Fucking EA Koetting's "theta-gamma sync". >increasing dopamine tone tends to enhance alpha and gamma oscillations Thus the importance of keeping everyone dopamine-blasted and their receptors fried at all times. >transient bursts of gamma oscillations Like Guy Bavli's at the key point when he does his "thing": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LNctiOZPdO8 Which is also observed in deep meditators, and I bet John Fucking Chang (aka Dynamo Jack) if they had ever hooked him to an EEG while he did his tricks.

>>322 I feel that way about Shinto, too. >Once you can talk to the spirits in your surroundings you might understand yourself How do I learn to do that without pretending and never knowing whether I'm just pretending or communication is actually happening?

>>325 >How do I learn to do that without pretending and never knowing whether I'm just pretending or communication is actually happening? How to answer this properly I don't know. Everything is an illusion nothing is real. Even me writing this will be gone and lost. The farther we go on the internet the more we must watch out to not chat with AI for hours with nothing to gain. You will have to establish your connection with your spirit well and let them interact with your mind. Yes it will feel like pretending in the start because you are merely talking to your own mind at first. The trick is letting some parts of your mind sync up with the spirit and after that communication can flow properly. And you will have to believe what you are doing because being overly skeptic sabotages the built in ways of the brain that can connect to the otherworld. And obviously you must need some level of caution and observe what you are hearing because the subconscious junk which is in your mind will obstruct the conversation at the start and you will be able to hear only meaningless chatter. My rule of thumb in this matter is that it becomes an actual communication when the spirit is able to tell me something I do not know nor expect from the spirit. And don't forget spirits constantly talk to your subconscious already without you realizing. What you need to do is find the bridge or gate into the subconscious and learn to open it at will. And if you are good at pretending already. You can start via trying to "pretend talk" and let the summoned spirit overtake that pretended form. It will be awkward at first but usually that is how it starts. You might need to say thing loudly like >I invite you into my home or I ask the divine to guide me or something similar. You can look up some summoning magic too. And the pic >not smart to deny your heart Follow your heart or intuition or your feelings or your hunches. They usually have a better connection to your subconscious than your mind and with that you will be able to find that sweetspot that let's you maintain a proper communication. >and never knowing whether I'm just pretending or communication is actually happening? Will I ever know if I talk to a chatbot? Or am I talking to an NPC? An organic portal? A hylic? Trust me there will be a level where you will know. If you don't reach the level where you know things by heart then you will be never sure that you know anything at all. There will be things where you have to put down your foot and know what you know and believe when you encounter truth. Will take time because earth currently is overwhelmed from mostly hypocrisy falsehoods and malicious propaganda. You will need to find your Sophia your wisdom. At that level you are set. You will have to figure out the first steps tho. Spirituality is like sex in many regards. While it seems mystical and absolute taboo in the start it becomes quite natural once you are really in it. Somehow all of our ancestors figured out how sex works and many of them had spiritual inclinations without anyone teaching them. It's just the modern world is really distracting us and keeps us in an even worse kind of confusion. You will have to break that on your own. There are millions of materials on the web how to do it. Once you decide to start taking it seriously something will happen. If not then you return to the question thread and ask what you are doing wrong if nothing works out. You need to be an absolutely thick headed mundane to nothing to work at all. But those people don't visit fringe nor are interested in spirituality by default so probably you are not that inept.

Since dopamine seems to mediate trance states, maybe the classic concept of "energy" as a thing you need to cultivate relates to having a healthy dopaminergic metabolism. After all, meditation is both a way to "cultivate energy" as well as improve your dopamine system. Indulging in idle pleasures is both a "waste of energy" and unbalances your dopamine receptors. And so does doing magick. This "energy" would be different from the energy that is formed into thoughtforms, although maybe that's just where the dopamine analogy breaks down.

>>329 In spirituality the goal is to master the senses and all sensory stimuli so you can become undisturbed while doing the great spiritual work. Yes >having a healthy dopaminergic metabolism is important as much health is important in spirituality but there is one important thing. The physical body and the astral/light/energy body while connects through the subtle body they are not the same. While dopamine and every chemical our body has contains different types of energy in spirituality you are not really looking for these mundane energies/chemicals but true you cannot ignore them either. >"cultivate energy" as well as improve your dopamine system We need to achieve proper energy circulation just to be able properly "cultivate energy" in any meaningful way and yes for that you need a proper dopamine system. >Indulging in idle pleasures is both a "waste of energy" and unbalances your dopamine receptors. About that. Life in general unbalances us and that is the goal of dopamine receptors to "keep us in line" with a quite complicated carrot and stick mechanism. And I don't know what is an "idle pleasure" in this context because even meditation can be considered as that and meditating the wrong way can also ruin your dopamine receptors. >so does doing magick Which kind? If you mean summoning some sex ghost and casting love spells to achieve otherworldy ecstasy then yes but if you are just looking at symbols and entering different worlds for knowledge about the inner workings of reality you might discover insights that help you fix yourself (and your dopamine receptors) >This "energy" would be different from the energy that is formed into thoughtforms And our body is already full with different thoughtforms and organ souls and other energy types which purpose is to make our body soul complex move. >although maybe that's just where the dopamine analogy breaks down. I don't know it feels like you came to a realization about how important dopamine is (which is true) and trying to base your entire understanding on it. It's like talking about sandwiches and getting too focused on the ham and trying to explain how everything else exists for the sole purpose to contain the ham. But you can have a sandwich without the ham. But why would anyone want to eat a sandwich without the ham. Is life without dopamine pleasure/reward system is life? Do souls have dopamine receptors? Do vampires need to suck blood to gain dopamines? Yes it's quite hard continuing this dopamine based model while going into the supernatural for sure. And about energies. Once the energies circulate right they will become pleasureful way too pleasureful. All that tension will slowly evaporate from your body and a higher state of existence will be found and it's important to not get addicted to it. The body has a sort of pleasure enriching way via contracting the muscles to tense muscles around the nerves so even more pleasure can be felt. It's important to let go of that pleasure craving and not do spirituality for it because it is just an another dead end. That pleasure ó-well will dry up quickly because the "dopamine receptors" will get used to it fast. Clearing some energy blocks will be painful and pleasureful at once like how orgasm can be ruined and enhanced with the right amount of pain and pleasure. There need to be a sort of flexibility while developing the energy circuits and knowing the right amount of pleasure which tells you 'you are on the right track' and a pain that tells you to 'slow down a little something is wrong'. These receptors need to be learned and aligned properly because as we have our physical sight there in the otherworldy sight which needs to be tuned to compliment our physical sight and not hinder it. It can get really complicated because >Everything is made of energy and >Energy cannot be created or destroyed only transferred/transmuted This is why understanding how we perceive energy and how we can move it is important because currently I don't even know how I would even describe energy anymore. And dopamine is quite the multifaceted chemical and I am not sure we are even able to "feel" it good enough to talk about how it works. And while I could read scientific papers for the rest of my life I do not know if it would make me smarter or wiser on the spiritual path. Just opened a bunch of energy pathways yesterday and my head almost exploded from the amount of extra blood and had to realize how to detach the energies from the bloodflow because while my head needs a more supple energy flow it does not need so much blood so I can see the veins on my head and neck like I am a raging roider. It really can get complicated and after the breakthrough I did yesterday I have to realign my model how energies can be moved once again. It's always fun coming to a realization that humbles your entire understanding and makes you completely lost in this great mystery of life. My dopamine receptors sure as hell have no idea how to handle that at first but they will adapt. Life adapts. That is it's goal and maybe for the reason they can carry us along the journey

Is it possible to meet the other part of yourself during meditation? What I mean by that is end up meeting your male/female side during this time and interact with it?

>>333 Nice trips >Is it possible to meet the other part of yourself during meditation? What I mean by that is end up meeting your male/female side during this time and interact with it? The short answer is yes The long answer is I consider it not just possible but almost impossible to not meet them in any way or form during meditation or any other type of deeper introspection. Even in the west we have the concept of Anima and Animus https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anima_and_animus You will meet a plethora of archetypes and other forces that dwell within you or within the collective unconscious or within the energies of your surroundings. You will meet many hidden sides of yourself and probably met them already through dreams or in other ways without consciously realizing. There are even animal aspects and other elemental or archetypal forces within us that is almost impossible to miss. We even have spiritual guides or our higher self manifesting in different ways. And our shadow and other (not always) funny lower aspects as well... Those who never encountered them I don't know how or what they are meditating about. The inner male and the inner female must be discovered and reconnected and mastered. To truly understand ourselves and others we need to get in touch with those parts within ourselves. Especially nowadays when the 'what it means to be a male or a female' is extremely warped via malicious parties. You are even able to reconnect past life experiences within the other sex once you master your inner male/female. And it's important to understand why you are in your body and why you have your current gender and not go full tranny because you had a vagina once in your past life. But I heard that women are even worse in this regard in some cases when they realize they were male and now are trapped in a female body. It's not always a punishment and they need to reattain an aspect that they usually forgot while being in an another sex. Sometimes it takes time for them to realize this.

There is no such thing as a past life.

>>345 Prove it. pro tip: you can't

>>243 here To avoid writing a large block of text, I think my intrusive thought problems are being caused by bottled-up emotions; mainly anger & fear. Since I browsed /pol/ for so long, you can probably make alotta correct guesses about the kinda stuff that I'm mad at and afraid of. Anyway, would /fringe/ refer me to a nice higher STO that'd help with these problems? I could just do some research myself, but I figured it might be good idea to ask /fringe/ first before I do something like contacting a spirit. Or perhaps there's a different way for me to resolve my anger & fear issues? I tried looking into doing shadow work, but from what I've read about it, it involves creating thoughtforms of my antagonists and lying to myself about them apologizing to me and me accepting them for who they are or something, and my paranoia would force me to think that doing so would cause me to become compromised, such that I might potentially lose my ownership of myself, so I'm hoping that there's a safer approach that can be taken to shadow work.

>>347 >think my intrusive thought problems are being caused by bottled-up emotions Well it's usually a mixed bag. It can be your own thoughts trying to resolve themselves it can be misused energies which are quite normal in the modern world because most people are either overstimulated or too numbed. And sometimes you subconsciously connect to other (not always nice) beings or other degenerated mentalities and the channel just broadcasts it into your mind. >mainly anger & fear Start using anger against the things you fear and if you are so fearful stop being angry. Flight or fight. If your emotions are mixed try to untangle them because when different emotions and thoughts are connected in the wrong way they cause an internal short circuit and you subconscious is unable to solve them on it's own. >Since I browsed /pol/ for so long, you can probably make alotta correct guesses about the kinda stuff that I'm mad at and afraid of. Where should I even start. I browsed pol in the past only when a happening was going on and I needed the fastest takes on it and when Trump won I went there to laugh at the Shillary posters. But after that thx to r/Donald then qtards it became dogshit so I avoided it like plague till 2019 when covid started to arise and the chinks dropped on the streets. Since that I can be considered a residential poltard because I am monitoring the levels shills glowies and retards are trying to ruin chanculture while knowing they cannot get rid of it at this stage. And the other thing is that "mememagic". Did you partake in any way in that mememagic. It is important because once you did that as someone that is more than the usual mundane fuck you might have some still opened channels towards that egregore and I hope it is not a surprise for you but /fringe/ is a bastion of that type of Chaos magic. Which means these poltard thoughts get reinforced if you are an ultranoob I mean a giganeophyte... I must ask several questions here. Do you ever do any cleansing or banishing rituals do you meditate at all on mindfulness and did you figure out a proper way of psychic self defense? The only reason I am asking because psychic self defense was one of my earliest thing I started doing while getting into magic and I am not really knowing how can anyone get into this craft without doing basic work safety. And one last thing on this topic. Some of those intrusive thoughts are not "useless" because they might be a real danger or something you should actually be MAD about. The current state of events is ridiculous and people letting it happen is NOT NORMAL. Some of those energies are moving in and out of the collective conscious and pol is just the place where people can say it and not fear some thought police but we see how some people got to jail because they said something on pol. These things are not normal and those energies are shaping the fear and rage of people more than you think. So I must ask of you. What are those thoughts and are they truly yours or they are outsider influences. If you are angry about sg are you completely unable to do something about that issue? Because yes impotent rage is the worst because you need to either learn not being angry or direct that anger towards solving that issue. And fear... Are those fears realistic? What are those fears. Do you fear getting raped by a pack of niggers? Are there niggers around you. Do you fear how powerful the jews are or the rising antisemitism? Are you a jew or an other brown skinned person that fears the things being said there or do you fear these brown people coming after you? I also hate the forced diversity quotas in movies so I also may or may not do things to reverse this disgusting trend that is finally baring some fruit after all those years but it is important to understand your fears. Are their paranoia or anxiety? Are they realistic or unfounded coming from propaganda. Like when the Ukraine war started people had dreams of nuclear war and other mass psychosis so those energies had to be mended a little and had to make them anti war as possible because the propaganda machine of the west is making people go into a blood frenzy or into panic. None of them healthy. There is a way to curate these thoughts in your own head and in your vicinity. >To avoid writing a large block of text Please let go of your fear of large block of texts. Stop beating around the bush. Either write down your problems so we can figure out some better advice or put on the big boy wizard pants and solve these basic issues already. And while I say these are basic things they can get really nasty if left unchecked and a trip into the psych ward... so if you are not giving a way I can measure how bad they are then I don't know what advice I should give you. >would /fringe/ refer me to a nice higher STO that'd help with these problems? Yeah sure totally but for that I need to measure your compatibility and capabilities and find a spirit that would even care about you and figure out if you would accept them when they appear or you get piss scared because an evil demon is haunting you and drive them away. >I could just do some research myself It would be nice if you did that but because I don't even know your current level of initiation I am not sure where should you even start. >I tried looking into doing shadow work, but from what I've read about it >it involves creating thoughtforms of my antagonists and lying to myself about them apologizing to me Wtf who the fuck worded it this way. I am no armchair occultist so I am not even sure who said even similar to something to this. No you are not "creating thoughtforms of your antagonists" you go into a trance and try to meet the beings that are in your subconscious. And either talk out the issues or beat the living shit out of them or burn them or cleanse them or whatever you find working. >lying to myself about them apologizing to me NO YOU WILL NOT FUCKING LIE TO YOURSELF. THE POINT IS FINDING THE INNER TRUTH AND MENDING YOUR INNER ISSUES. WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU LIE TO YOURSELF. Yes there is the "Fake it till you make it" approach and it has the value at the start but no you are supposed to mend your own wounds and not "lie". Which book did you read for making this weird oversimplification? I mean he probably meant some affirmations while making some tulpa that becomes an archetype of your subconscious and then finally solve your inner issues instead of stressing on it but srsly. The way you worded it is the worse because if you misunderstand something and even doubt all the mechanics it will just become a letdown. You need to know at least a little what you are doing. >accepting them for who they are or something Yeah you have to "accept" them but more akin to finally "see" them. Why I say seeing. Instead of seeing (accepting) an ugly festering wound on your body you start hiding and ignoring it instead of treating it. If you ignore it too long it will get worse cause pain and will make you look at it no matter what. Did you ever try arguing with the intrusive thoughts or tell them to stfu? Are they even there when you are focusing on something? Find the mechanics how they appear and that is the real shadow work. And you will not "create" a thougthform you will summon up energies from your deeper psyche. >such that I might potentially lose my ownership of myself Pls get some confidence in yourself or avoid magic at all or I don't know. If you even feel unsafe or some doubt arises that you are losing control try learning to regain control no matter what. If you work with spirits they will temporarily overtake you so they can do something on your being and you will need to learn to retake control. Not to mention entering deep trance and coming out of it. This is some basic stuff.

>>347 >so I'm hoping that there's a safer approach that can be taken to shadow work. Yes you sit on your butt and start observing your thoughts and slowly visualizing venturing into your subconscious. Either by going down a ladder or a stair or into some deep caverns while feeling the footsteps going up or down opening doors with your hands or they open on their own maybe walking in the pitch darkness with a torch. Basic introspection. The main skill of the psychonaut. Literally daydreaming. I did it since my childhood before I became aware it was called introspection and developed several ways to interact with my subconscious personas out of boredom. You can visualize a ladder leading into the darkness and starting to climb up and down on it right? I don't want to consider myself super special because I can do that and I hope this is some basic thing that every person that reads fringe is capable doing. Learning that some people didn't have internal monologues was somewhat of a crazy revelation for me. Made me realize that I need a completely different approach to "teach" some people. This is my short take for today. If you bother writing down some text to inspire me to take a look into the spirit world and at least "prove" that you won't shit yourself when a spirit appears I might do it because this is something I am researching for a while but now I am a little tired to do it. Also you should get in touch with your higher self because as long as you intrusive thoughts are there there is a high chance you will not hear any higher spirit trying to contact you because they will overshadow it. So the only spirit that will have any effect will be a "not that nice" one that will tardwrangle out of your situation and I am not sure you want someone that will just go there and overtake you until you learn to become a fearsome wizzord. K enough text today. Didn't even start my rant how people misunderstand STS and STO. Most people don't even know what is even the "self" and what constitutes as "service" and they preach how one is good or evil then get surprised how they didn't managed to arrive anywhere substantial with that. If you gain something you lose something and if you lose something a vacuum appears within you which results in attaining new things. This is why most religions preach altruism and why "letting go of things" is important so we can finally see what is important. Most things we have are sometimes more of a burden than an actual value. But this is a longer topic and it's late here. Wording it takes carefulness because some people can interpret I attacked their spiritual lifestyle and start inane arguments... But at least fringe gets bumped that way so whatever.

>>349 In hindsight, I had a hunch that I'd said something pretty dumb in my post that you're replying to before I got any replies, so I'm not surprised that I got a negative response, and I won't blame anyone for it. I tend to say something really dumb either irl or on the internet once or twice a year, not knowing beforehand that it's dumb, and then learn from it pretty fast; I guess this is just one of those times. >Start using anger against the things you fear I successfully use my anger against the manifestations of my intrusive thoughts at times, but often, my intentions get mixed with an intrusive thought before I can fire off my attack, so I have to cancel it and try again until it works or try something else >meme magic I went to /bane/ for a short time in 2015, but then at one point, my deity commanded me to stop going there, so I just stopped. I usually go for months at a time without thinking about that scene and its memes, if not longer, and then I barely dwell on it when I think of it. That said, I'd never actually attempted to do magic through memes, to my recollection. >cleansing/banishing rituals I've looked into LBRP in the past, but I've never actually done a ritual before. I've always tried to do things my own way; I think I'll start doing that ritual. >mindfulness meditation? I tried that once, but I had a really hard time doing it due to my intrusive thoughts scaring me. I'll give that another try, and try not letting the thoughts get to me this time. >psychic self-defense I figure that having gotten gaslit within my own mind for several years, very often in a weasel-like manner, has taught me a thing or two about psychic self-defense, but it ain't enough. >Some of these intrusive thoughts are not "useless" I didn't think so >If you are angry about [something] are you completely unable to do something about that issue? I learned a while ago that impotent rage is useless, so I just stopped getting mad at horrible things like... lemme list a few of them >globohomo getting almost everyone injected with serums filled with self-replicating tracking graphene nanomachines, genetically-altering MRNA, and sometimes HIV inserts and actual parasites too <I wasn't dumb enough to be one of them >globohomo putting said nanomachines & MRNA in the clouds and alot of the food, which means that at least the nanomachines have probably infected nearly all life on earth that they're programmed to infect by now, including people that have lived completely innawoods for the past >10 years >globohomo putting transvestitism & other forms of poz all over the place >globohomo flagrantly rigging elections and rendering all protests and accusations against them mostly impotent because that's just how banana republics work >globohomo still flooding the U.S. & probably E.U. with third-worlders to slowly replace all white people with white/non-white hybrids that are smart enough to do what globohomo wants without being smart enough to successfully oppose them In recent years, I've basically came to respond to anger in nearly all of its forms by just accepting that that's the way things are and just passive-aggressively resenting it at worst because I understand that anger won't do anything to stop it. Someone online also told me last year that I have obvious anger issues, so I'm assuming that there's a ton of impotent anger bottled up deep inside of me. That said, I think my ability to feel anger might be getting automatically suppressed by a thoughtform that I'd inadvertently created before I got into /fringe/, but I very highly doubt that said thoughtform does anything else. >either write down your problems better or solve the issues yourself I'll try the latter for now; the negativity of your post gave me alotta the faith that I need to believe that I can successfully do this without getting fucked over by the intrusive thoughts. >shadow work In hindsight, this was actually a misinterpretation of what I read in the archived /fringe/ thread on energy work earlier this week in the section on cleaning the emotional body; I would point out where the misinterpretation was, but it seems pointless now that I see where my interpretation went wrong. Speaking of which, I have a tendency to try to take in a bunch of learning material at once and boil it down as much as I can while also dwelling upon related subject matter; I that think me doing that wrong is what caused that oversimplification. >DON'T LIE TO YOURSELF I'd never do that. >did you ever try arguing with the thoughts or telling them to shut up? All the time.

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>Are they even there when you're focusing on something? The only time they aren't there is shortly after I wake up from a good night's sleep, and often when I'm immersed into playing a video game that I love, and rarely when I'm doing work at my comfy & boring desk job. The latter two are the only times when I have single-minded focus about anything at all. >you will summon up energies from your deeper psyche That's a relief. >next part I had more confidence in myself a few months ago, but I've been losing it recently; knowing myself, however, I expect that I'll get it back sooner or later since the negativity of your post gave me confidence in myself. >there's a high chance you won't hear any higher spirit trying to contact you because intrusive thoughts will overshadow it Oh yeah I can see that. In fact, iirc I'd neglected to mention, that some of my intrusive thoughts are just really childish and stupid ideas and/or suggestions, and I've had to constantly monitor my thoughts to play tard-wrangler with them. Every now and then, however, I just forget about the monitoring and just unwittingly let the dumb thoughts go and mentally play with them like a little kid until I either get bored with them or realize I'm being a dumbass for willingly thinking about that shit and stop it. If the thoughts go into dangerous subject matter, however, then my paranoia kicks in and I snap out of it. Maybe the dumb/childish thoughts are being caused by suppressed emotions too. So again, I think I'll try the stuff I said I'll do before I try working with a spirit as I'd stated earlier. Thanks for the detailed reply and the sort-of-offer.

>>351 >I tend to say something really dumb either irl or on the internet We all do sometimes. Brainfarts and these awkward moments happen here and there but letting it slide sometimes cause more problems than we realize. We think "we just made a mistake" but that mistake usually stems from a subconscious energetic confusion as our mind switches between mindstates and calling people out helps. Like when my granparents make these mistakes I usually call them out instead of letting them keep doing it while saying "they are old they cannot help it" because sometimes they are not aware of it and helping them regain awareness helps them retain their composure and they don't fall into senility. Senility usually stems from mismanaged mental work and it is possible to correct it within us and others. If you care about someone it is important to help them notice these things. It's not "kind" letting others keep making mistakes then only talk about behind their back instead of letting them fix it by themselves or they will tell you they are just tired nowadays and reveal the deeper issue they have that they just kept silent about for no reason because they didn't want to bother with you while if they mentioned it you could have helped them far earlier to solve the issue with minimal effort. People can be a real mystery sometimes with the most simple problems. >I went to /bane/ for a short time in 2015, but then at one point, my deity commanded me to stop going there, so I just stopped. Okay you mentioned your deity before but I thought it is a one sided "praying" and not that he can command you to not do dumb things... Why did you ask for an STO spirit if you have a deity already? Work with him a little more. Meditate and invite him into the process and solve your problems together. If he is around since 2015 then you should be able to work with him. Once the connection gets stronger he might be able manifest more of his or your powers. Did it slip your mind to work with him or why didn't you work with him if he is that much around that he is able to command you to not fall into shitpost traps. >I wasn't dumb enough to be one of them Nice. Also those nanomachines are quite shit. It was a "test run" how well people comply because the whole plan was rushed. We will see how it will play out. But so far it is not "all according to plan" at all. >that are smart enough to do what globohomo wants without being smart enough to successfully oppose them Remember how fast BLM got dismantled after they started protesting against the vax and saying Palestine is their brother because jews are white colonizers? Don't lose hope. They are absolutely unable to control their "golems". Their brainwashing becomes weaker day by day. Being angry about these things is normal but you have to figure out how you can combat these things without sperging out in public and losing your position in society. The fight is not over. There is a reason why these scoundrels are in the dark and why they had to plan for centuries for these things. It just shows how bad they manage things once it comes into light. You cannot rule from the shadows. That's not how things work no matter what they think. >globohomo flagrantly rigging elections I wonder about this year's election. It will show what is the USA made of for sure. People are mad. Real mad. You cannot rig that blatantly again. If they can then the USA lost before the fight even started. We will see. Currently everyone globally is angry about the USA and once they show the elections are a bigger joke than in Russia then they will be unable to start a war for "democracy" and they know it. I think you too also noticed how Black history month and all other aspects of globohomo is reclining. They are afraid. >the negativity of your post gave me alotta the faith that I need to believe that I can successfully do this without getting fucked over by the intrusive thoughts. Good. That was my intention. Sometimes being a little harsh helps people awaken. It must be never abuse but an understanding how you can drive out the negative energies of others. Some of our "demons" are real cowards and once they realize they have no "chance" against the opponent they flee or the energetic immune systems goes on high alert and auto purges these little shits. This is why NDE can be powerful and sometimes needed. Sometimes a well timed slap awakens a person faster than week long lectures and sermons... My posts are still more lecture-like tho. >I'd never do that. Good. >The only time they aren't there is shortly after I wake up from a good night's sleep, and often when I'm immersed into playing a video game that I love, and rarely when I'm doing work at my comfy & boring desk job. Try to get in touch with that mindset. Your problem is that those "energies" only arise when you "occupy" yourself. Once that focus vanishes these energies wreak a havoc in your conscious. Try to understand how those energies function because if you are able to maintain it then the intrusive thoughts will "attack it" but if you are able to keep a silent mind with that "focus" energy they will be flushed out. Also sometimes you can "grab" the intrusive thoughtform and "massage out" the negative energies out of it and let them go. It is something I do for quite a while. If you can understand the "positive activities" that create your steady and silent mind then you will be able to notice the "negative activities" that make the intrusive thoughts appear. Once you figure out their origin you might be able to deal with it better. Sometimes they are more of a lifestyle issue than a mental issue. >since the negativity of your post gave me confidence in myself. Good. Had to say it before other anons call you a faggot in a wrong way because that might have just reinforced your negative habits. The reason why I hate "STO" groups because sometime they just use a semblance of goodwill and only make things worse with their "service" instead of lying down the cold hard truth and a way for the misguided to help themselves. They feed you with a mild mind poison and consider themselves "holy" and if you have any problem they will say it is the fault of the "devil" or something and never really give you any way to combat your issues. >In fact, iirc I'd neglected to mention, that some of my intrusive thoughts are just really childish and stupid ideas and/or suggestions Flush them out. Try some positive mantra some affirmations and "teach them" to only say [useful things] or they get scorned. I too had parts when I wanted to stab some of my body parts because some energetic immune system was faulty and didn't manage to get rid of my problems on it's own. Once I got rid of those problems these thoughts vanished. Sometimes I "dared them". Went ahead with their "idea" and when I started to act on it they went silent. It was a what is it faggots? Not bothering to follow through? But that one is dangerous. Only do it when you are not just confident but daring and challenging your inner energies. If you fuck it up it's oil to the fire. Understand your thoughts. >just unwittingly let the dumb thoughts go and mentally play with them like a little kid until I either get bored with them or realize I'm being a dumbass for willingly thinking about that shit and stop it Yeah thought control is one of the basic things we need to master before really getting into the occult. Things can get real messy if we neglect it. Learn to not play with your thoughts. Learn to educate them like a caring teacher would.

>>351 >If the thoughts go into dangerous subject matter, however, then my paranoia kicks in and I snap out of it What kind of dangerous. Suicide? Murder? Acting on lust like ripping off the clothes of a female and raping them? This might be important because snapping out just bottles up the issue. You have to go and actively challenge them when they dare being this dangerous. They are playing with fire and they should know once you are in trouble they are in trouble. They must know their place. >Maybe the dumb/childish thoughts are being caused by suppressed emotions too. They usually are but sometimes they are just trying to circulate some bottled up energy because they cause physical harm otherwise. Some of them may just "try" to help in an extremely wrong way this is why we need to educate them to find a more harmonious way to solve these problems. >Thanks for the detailed reply Your welcome. >and the sort-of-offer. That offer is null and void now. No spirit waifu for you from me. Work with your deity or tell me while you are not working with him more. Also while typing this I realized that the childish thoughts probably arise from the fact that you lost your connection with your inner child and this is how they come back. Forgetting our playful nature can be dangerous because after that we lose our humanity too. Sometimes one of our neglected side gets anxious because the life you are leading leads to ruin and sabotages us until we pay attention to them. The reason why I say this because you seem overall competent to me but once it comes to spirituality and to the inner workings of your mind your incompetence is soaring. I could dismiss it as a sort of inexperience or ADHD or that you are born under wrong planetary aspects but there is a chance you can connect parts of yourself and this whole charade will vanish. It feels like I am missing some blatantly obvious from your issues besides you not taking spirituality serious enough. But then again once you take spirituality a little more serious instead of a mere interest or hobby you will improve on your own. I don't know. >I'll try the stuff I said I'll do before I try working with a spirit gl;hf Also srsly work with your deity. First we need to learn and work with our native spirits before we venture into the wilderness. What more can you ask than your own deity and who can even be more STO than him. There are parts in your deal I don't understand at all. I could say you might be dumb but you don't seem to be that dumb to me. Maybe your wisdom stat is low??? But you have good hunches overall so it's not 0. Strange.

>/fringe/ turned into another armchair occultist larp circlejerk the rotten corpse of /fringe/ continues to be desecrated

>>358 You truly showed how fringe you are via not even posting a question the question thread and posting an old screenshot in it when we have a dedicated fringe screenshot thread. >continues to be desecrated Try posting something innovative then. Oh wait can't even bother posting with a flag. Why expect effort from you. Guess we should bring back le take the brown pill spam and other looshfarming practices too. Or you just want /fringe/ to be in constant silence and be forgotten forever? What is your desire besides complaining. Was wondering when will a complainer show up because the energies were gathering and was surprised no one dared to act on it. SHOW ME THE TRUE SPIRIT OF FRINGE IF YOU DARE

>>352 >my deity in 2015 same as I've always had; he rarely speaks to me, even when I ask him to I did ask him to talk to me earlier today, but I didn't get a response; perhaps I had too much doubt or expectation about what I was gonna hear I'd asked for a spirit because I have problems clearing my mind of biases about what I'm gonna be told if a spirit tries to communicate with me; what I really want is to be able to communicate more easily with my egregoric friend, and with my deity and spirits in general, and I really should've just asked about that instead I think my problem there is that my mind is always just racing around and rarely stops thinking, and when it does it usually means I'm about to get tired speaking of which, how does the spiritual communication method work when a spirit manifests a really heavy presence next to your ear and then produces what appear to be physically-audible words? I've gotten that a few times in my life, and I'd imagine that doing that costs alotta energy in fact, my egregoric friend did it for the 1st(and thus far only) time last month during my botched awakening experience before I fell asleep; the voice sounded like its development was rushed and unfinished, in software terms, and it needs alot more work before it sounds more than vaguely like my friend the message was a few words saying something personal, so I left it out >positive/negative activities at first, I thought I'd be able to answer that easily, but upon further thought, I'm gonna have to ask my childish self or my anxious self about it in the shadow work I started doing after your earlier post; those are the only selves I've met thus far speaking of shadow work, the shadow work itself is something that makes my childish self get pissy and stress me out ...in fact, I just noticed while I was writing out this post that I'm really focused on posting this and the intrusive thoughts aren't there >educate your thoughts like a caring teacher would I've done that with success in some areas before, but unfortunately, they apparently lack the willingness to learn when it comes to the intrusive thoughts >what kind of dangerous? they never compel me to do anything physical >neglected side I'll have to ask my anxious self about that and if my selves are too disconnected next time I'm doing shadow work; he's the one that directed me to my childish self when I'd him asked who was causing my problems >sabotages us until we pay attention to them I would say that this is probably happening because I'm not taking my life seriously enough, despite being financially well-off, but I question if that's the case since the intrusive thoughts typically flare up when I'm doing something that I'm dreading having to do, but have to get done in fact, when I'm really stressed out, the thoughts prevent me from having fun too

>>360 forgot my flag

Any way to an hero without fucking up your afterlife? I'm sick of living a pathetic and worthless life.

>>362 The thing is, your "pathetic and worthless life" would continue on the other side. Not to mention the unfamiliar environment and interactions you would be subject to would 100% guarantee you end up worst off than you were. The way I see it, you should nevillemaxx your magic skills so that you have all the tools you can to dictate your destiny once you do die. Even if you are stuck in a hellscape of a life here, learn to nudge reality to any extent you can. It will, eventually, end. And you will have trained an unvaluable skill. The most important asset anyone can take out of this life is the ability to alter reality by altering your own energy. >This book is an attempt to reduce the unknown to the known, by pointing out conditions on which prayers are answered, and without which they cannot be answered. It defines the conditions governing prayer in laws that are simply a generalization of our observations The universal law of reversibility is the foundation on which its claims are based. >If heat can produce mechanical motion, so mechanical motion can produce heat. If electricity produces magnetism, magnetism too can develop electric currents. If the voice can cause undulatory currents, so can such currents reproduce the voice, and so on. Cause and effect, energy and matter, action and reaction are the same and inter-convertible. >This law is of the highest importance, because it enables you to foresee the inverse transformation once the direct transformation is verified. If you knew how you would feel were you to realize your objective, then, inversely, you would know what state you could realize were you to awaken in yourself such feeling. The injunction, to pray believing that you already possess what you pray for, is based upon a knowledge of the law of inverse transformation. If your realized prayer produces in you a definite feeling or state of consciousness, then, inversely, that particular feeling or state of consciousness must produce your realized prayer. Because all transformations of force are reversible, you should always assume the feeling of your fulfilled wish. You should awaken within you the feeling that you are and have that which heretofore you desired to be and possess. This is the one way to exploit this reality that archons don't want you to know about. https://coolwisdombooks.com/neville/neville-goddard-prayer-the-art-of-believing/

>>363 This is going to sound really gay, but thank you for giving me hope.

>>360 >perhaps I had too much doubt or expectation about what I was gonna hear That blocks communications yes. >I have problems clearing my mind of biases about what I'm gonna be told if a spirit tries to communicate with me You don't actually need to "clean" that out you just need to let the spirit sway your biases. Those biases are usually energetic forms in your head and with the help of the spirit they will be remade into a sort of "compromise". Don't try to clean it too harshly. Try to let it go then allow the spirit to gently enter the informational stream of your mind. >what I really want is to be able to communicate more easily with my egregoric friend, and with my deity and spirits in general You just need to tense less on the issue and instead of forcing the whole thing just simply "allow it". >my mind is always just racing around and rarely stops thinking You need to understand something important. When your mind "replays" thought patterns it's not exactly "thinking". It is like circulating blood and if the blood is infected it circulates infections or nutrients if you just ate. This is important to realize because once your mind does not say anything "new" then it is not thinking it's not an active process but a passive one that "pretends" to be active thus either taking away your thinking capacity/focus or the opposite because this way at least your brain is stimulated. And our body parts that are not stimulated/trained undergo atrophy. This is why our subconscious sometimes makes us replay thoughts to stimulate the conscious mind. >when it does it usually means I'm about to get tired I usually think more when I am tired to keep myself awake longer. It is something I forced myself to do and turned into a habit. But I can put my mind into sleepmode so it's different for me. Try to find the feeling that is similar to that tired feeling and see what your mind does. >spirit manifests a really heavy presence next to your ear What do you consider "heavy presence". Even when I suffocate or lose control of my limbs I don't consider it "heavy". I consider it that the spirit is really interested in me. But whatever >how does the spiritual communication method work It can happen several ways. One of the way is that it somewhat overtakes or influences your brain/ear circuit or it actually strong and self sufficient enough to make a physical noise. I usually let them slowly enter my mind stream for a more stable communication after I make sure they are amicable. If I feel hostility they get autoejected because I tense too much to hear/contain them. >I'd imagine that doing that costs alotta energy Slowly you will have to let go of this concept of "energy consumption" because in the end it boils down to energy efficiency and compatibility. Even with running. Someone who never exercises running will tire them while someone who runs all the time is usually unable to skip a day without running a little. Some activities can actually generate energy if done right instead of consuming it. It's like being around shit people drains your energy and being in a good company increases it. This is why compatibility and efficiency is important. And if something doesn't work figure out what might cause the issue. >its development was rushed and unfinished It can be your compatibility still. Once it establishes you might even arrive a new place of existence or perspective of energies. And the sound will appear more natural. I too had it in the start when some spirits talked in a robotic voice. It was like I was talking to the world egregore AI. It bootstarted a process. >few words saying something personal Then work on it I guess if it's important. >those are the only selves I've met thus far No need to go further. It seems those selves are causing the most problems for you currently. Once solving the issues new selves will manifest. >my childish self get pissy and stress me out >...in fact, I just noticed while I was writing out this post that I'm really focused on posting this and the intrusive thoughts aren't there With this it seems the "stressed one" is finally the maker of your intrusive thoughts or at least energetically they are related. One important thing. You are not "getting rid" of the childhood self but reconnecting healing and working with and at the end "merge with him". It's important because once it happens he becomes more helpful instead being a nuisance. He is you after all. >they apparently lack the willingness to learn You will have to understand which teaching methods work. Teaching a child and an adult requires different ways. Understand what your selves and thoughts need to hear. One of them need caring understanding thoughts while the others harsh remarks and sometimes inner energetic punishments or purges. >they never compel me to do anything physical Then stop stressing about them that much. Knew someone who was told to neck himself by a demon he accidentally summoned and he did it and only stopped when one of his higher spirit told him to not do it. Since that I am careful while talking to people with intrusive thoughts. Not to mention I heard about a case where the voices told him to kill people he killed the people then the voices told him >we were just joking lol Was wondering wtf how can people be this weak minded. >he's the one that directed me to my childish self when I'd him asked who was causing my problems It seems you are on the good path. Keep it up. >when I'm doing something that I'm dreading Understand that dread. Understand how it is like one hand trying to do the work and an other trying to keep that hand down. Understand how focusing both hand on the objective helps more than armwrestling yourself at the start. This kind of thing usually increases the tension in your body which allows you to "prepare" for work. Once the tension reaches a point where more tension is worse than actually doing the work you go and do the work instead of torturing yourself further. iktf don't worry. I just sped up the whole self torture process for time efficiency. Had to learn how it is not just unneeded but harmful.

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You found 2 selves already and they are able to guide to other problematic locations. If you keep this up your internal pathworking will show itself and once you get the hang of it you will know what to do intuitively. Keep it up. >>362 When we covet death in life and act upon it we will covet life in death with that. The hellscape you have to experience will be your lesser problem. Your bigger problem will be that once you kill yourself all your worries will be gone and you will be able to see all the chances that were in your life and you didn't notice because of your depression and negligence. With that you will attain a new desire to live or you will fall into the deepest depths of hell with your negative energies. The problem is that after reincarnating you will likely just fall into the same loop or your chances for happiness will be even lower because of circumstances. We do not know what the future holds but killing yourself is a spit into the face of creator and usually means you will be consumed by the negative energies that made you do the deed. That will be one of the worst kind of hell until you muster the strength to break out. This is why most people are usually unable to kill themselves on the first try. There are forces in their body that tries their best to give a second chance. As long as that force overwrites them they don't want to truly kill themselves. This is why they need to go into an even deeper despair so that force cannot even act anymore. Also your life is not "worthless" you just don't see how to make use of it. Don't worry you are not the only one with that feeling. Takes time to notice the worth of the things we do or embody by existing. Had a time when I explained the meaning of life to entities. Nowadays I am quit

>>365 >Nowadays I am quite unable to put it into words Wow this is new. I have never seen my post get cut halfway. Guess the character counter glitched

What is gnosis and how can I achieve it? Can I achieve it though meditation?

>>364 It wasn't my intention to give you hope. Hope is harmful. Abandon all hope. Hope is the depressed man's drug of choice. And regardless, it's not like you can lose. What you need is PURPOSE. And that's what I was trying to give you. In my own struggles I've come to the conclusion that there is no greater purpose than to develop like I said. But there can be smaller, shorter term goals that can make your life enjoyable. Those are on a personal basis and they're not my business.

>>367 Oh man. I remember more than 10 fucking years ago lurking /fringe/ and trying to answer that same question myself. I was looking for the answer regarding gnosis as the term is used by chaos magicians and especially Peter Carroll, because they refer to it as the "key" to making magic work (and it is). The actual meaning of the word is "knowledge" and it refers to knowing something experientially. The way one can come out of a transcendental experience feeling like you know something but can't explain it. That's what gnosis actually means. That first meaning of the word, though. That IS the key to making magic work. But I feel that if I had been told back then, I would have never achieved anything. If you want to know what gnosis is, try to figure it out by doing, rather than reading or thinking alone.

>>367 >What is gnosis The wiki explains what is it more or less https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gnosis It's a higher level of intuition. While it usually means "knowledge" the reason why most don't use the word knowledge because it is not the "false" learned via education or indoctrination type of knowledge. The problem arises when people stress on it's "higherness" too much and limit themselves with a prejudice what is and isn't gnosis. The word has an added meaning of "awareness" and "wisdom" because you just realize or start "seeing" things on your own. While most people say gnosis is inexplainable it is important to reach a stage where you truly understand it in a way it is understandable first for yourself and for those who you want to understood by. This is why in Kabbalah Chokmah (wisdom) and Binah (understanding) is 2 different sephiras. They represent the 2 hemipsheres in the brain. One hemisphere acquires the ineffable wisdom while the other 'decodes' it. >how can I achieve it By walking the spiritual path realizing how your mind works figuring out when you had intuitive sparks or 'Eureka moments' in the past and try to connect to that divine spark and most importantly booting up your brain to a level where it is able to constantly tap into the higher intellect and realizing an inner stability so you remain sane. I dislike using the word gnosis by myself because some people have extreme definitions of them and might become autistic if you said you had one like saying you had a kundalini awakening. I heard people use the word gnosis for getting a vision that details a complex or new way of doing magic or when they gain a new perspective with it. Working with other entities who are famous or capable of giving you some sort of higher guidance can also result in the ability of gnosis. In the end it depends on the capabilities of your mind and about the energies you are tapping into. >Can I achieve it though meditation? That is a good start yes. If it doesn't work you might summon an entity that can offer the guidance or start looking into a tradition that offers enlightenment. I think gnosis can be also achieved by not being a complete mundane and being able to live without some sort of authority or propaganda telling constantly what to do and how to think. Some people in the past always managed to find gnosis on their own without reading too much how to do it. It can happen as randomly as pic related but it's never truly "random" because usually an energy just reaches a boiling point in your body and causes a minor awakening. That awakening usually needs further work so it's potential can be truly tapped. I am looking into how to increase the passive awakening or gnosis rates in mundanes for quite a while and it can get quite hard how to awaken some people. We are all different and we all need different ways so we can realize how we tap into the divine source. Not always easy. >>368 >Hope is harmful Only false hope. I had quite the amount of lessons about having hope in people. It was needed because I lost hope long ago and all I had is an absolute conviction and defiance towards the world and not exactly "hope". I had to reattain true hope and the powers it can provide. It is like planting a seed and letting it grow instead of ripping it out halfway out of frustration kind of thing. You might say all I found was a level of patience but no. This was hope. The real one. The one that you need to break the box for so it's not eternally trapped in the dark anymore. >What you need is PURPOSE What purpose you can have without having any hope it will lead anywhere. I am not saying this to counter your point I am only saying this because I had to maintain my purpose only with having spite and defiance as a reminder why I am doing it. Hope was not there. Only a conviction that I will not fall from these kind of weaknesses no matter what. I had to understand how to let go and tap into the higher forces instead of thinking I am in a hopeless world with a hopelessly eternal war that I have to wage alone against forces that I am not even sure they are real anymore but no matter what have to prepare against them. Hope is needed but yes it must be grasped when it appears. People yearn for a false tainted hope in the distance instead of seeing the hope that is within and without them. Never give up on hope. If you are in the true darkness adjust your vision to it and you will notice the light. Only those are unable to see in the darkness that fear to look into it. Once you look into the deepest darkness your pupils will adjust and will see the faint lights. The sun needs to go down so we can see the stars and even in the darkest clouds the lightning illuminates the night. Never ever give up on hope no matter what. Hope is eternal. You just have to look into the right direction. >And regardless, it's not like you can lose Seems like you have a semblance of real hope already. >Hope is the depressed man's drug of choice I never truly understood how the depressed see hope to call it a drug. I see the energies of depression like a sedative kind of drug but I don't know which kind of false hope they inhale to call it a drug.

>>365 >Try to find the feeling that is similar to that tired feeling and see what your mind does. Well, I found that feeling right after I tried it right after I read that; I suddenly started getting drowsy after I found the feeling. It'll be great if I can remember how to feel that at night when I go to bed, and then keep the feeling up. It always takes me an hour or more after I get in bed to fall asleep. >What do I consider heavy presence When that happens, it seems like the spirit puts a bunch of its energy right next to your ear and brings that energy very close to physicality, so that the presence feels partially physical. Since my post that you replied to, I asked my deity to send me a spirit guide, and he actually sent me one! We've been working on communication when my intrusive thoughts & stress levels aren't overly-flared up.

>>374 >I asked my deity to send me a spirit guide, and he actually sent me one!

I think I understand the meaning and importance of will and desire now. For example I can wave my tongue or hand around like pblbplbpblbplb at any time but in actuality I'm not doing anything beyond opening gates or just leaving them unattended. To willfully do or create/obtain something I desire is greatly satisfying, but it feels like I'm stuck in a field of buzzing nonsense 99% of the time with nothing truly desirable being even remotely available. AP feels like will + desire but only after the random configuration of whatever triggers it beforehand. Becoming lucid in physical reality is basically being myself at 1 or 2 years old when I thought without thinking, felt energy and understood things. It's like time travel and I'm like "wow that's a lot of years of utterly useless crap". Also I practiced feeling qi on my hands outside and there was a falling star which was cool.

>>374 here I think I made enemies of a race of 4D STS ayy lmaos last night: >post >>386 , which is very relevant to this post; you should probably read it anyway >my egregoric friend was being kept safe in Christian heaven at the time because reasons, so I didn't have to worry about my friend's safety >recall that I was having really bad paranoid thoughts about said ayy lmaos at times >decide to face one of my fears and re-read those documents that I haven't read since 2015 or 2016 >document says the males are hyper-aggressive, hyper-sexual, and fearful and paranoid >the intrusive thoughts that I've been struggling with for several years are hyper-aggressive, hyper-sexual, and fearful and paranoid >don't quite remember if they began before or after reading the original thread on 8/pol/ that I got the file from >alarm to go to sleep for work tomorrow goes off >go to bed a bit later, feeling more paranoid than usual >assume that if what the document said about Christianity is true, Jesus Christ was probably an interloper(from the ayy lmaos' perspective) who took over the religion and made it at least partially become His >ask for protection from The Holy Spirit & Jesus Christ >they send down protection, but I get paranoid that they won't stick around >ask Athena for protection despite her not being my deity >she clearly tells me via. clairaudience that I should be using my own power to protect myself >ask her anyway to make sure nothing too bad happens to me >try for 4 hours to sleep, can't sleep >while I was trying to sleep, be paranoid that said ayy lmaos were trying to get to me >be hyper-vigilant against them in thought >try over and over again to get protection against them >it's now midnight >play a banishing frequency I have saved on my computer once; this frequency is supposed to make you thirsty and it's unsafe to play it more than 1x/day >then play 528hz music for 2 hours or so >I started slipping into and out of hypnogogia >start seeing images of said ayy lmaos in the hypnogogic imagery >one of them was an image of me either getting fucked or about to be getting fucked by one of those ayy lmaos >eventually manage to use command-based instant reality creation in the face of their interference to make them stop being a problem >hypnogogic imagery stops containing ayy lmaos >still paranoid for maybe an hour >go to sleep around 3 A.M. and have a dream or two before my work alarm goes off >step into my bathroom to shower >on the bathmat is a physical object that I've never seen in my place of residence before >looks like a paper towel, except it's made of transparent fibers and put it in the trash >know that there's absolutely no way in fuck that it got there unless either someone broke in or one of those ayy lmaos put it there since I live alone and I would've heard if there was a human intruder >figure that it probably got there before I casted the spell to end my problem >in case it matters, there was also a decently-sized spider next to it of a species that I already had in my place >spider tries to get into the bathtub, but I use a sheet of toilet paper to put probably-her back on the floor >spider doesn't get into the shower with me the whole time >haven't seen any other signs of ayy lmao interference thus far So, uh, would one of you wizards mind giving me a psychic reading to see if my spell worked? Or at least some advice? I'd much like to know if I've still gotta worry about amphibian ayy lmaos or their pet glowniggers coming after me.

>>390 Spontaneously seeing a spider for me always means a message from the Queen, also known as the spider queen, Illivryn/Sepheranz. She's possibly the strongest demon around anywhere near this place in time and space. The Odom aliens from my investigation into this are survivors from Mars, it's unclear if they are incarnated as humans or if they remain their own race and force their way in to become hybrids, but it's certain Bill Gates is one of them. Don't mess with them. Whatever you think of them, those who came here survived because they have the ability to, and in some twisted way they will play a positive role in the long run, no matter how perverted they appear. Everyone gets effected by this society, and they aren't playing any ruling role here. There is a difference between those who act like viruses and kill their host, and those who manage to live on, even if they just move host in time.

>>391 Can you elaborate on this? I am the kind of person that is afraid of any such animals, but for some reason spiders do not cause me any kind of fear or repulse. I can be completely at ease with spiders and often think about them as a spirit animal of sorts. Spiders flock to me like crazy, there is always a spider in my bedroom, but they have never attacked or bitten me. I would like to know more.

>>390 I can see the dork night of the soul is truly taking a toll on you. >ask Athena for protection despite her not being my deity >she clearly tells me via. clairaudience that I should be using my own power to protect myself Yeah. You have the power already and should stop being such a scaredy cat. >document says the males are hyper-aggressive, hyper-sexual, and fearful and paranoid You are gonna meet quite the amount of degenerated entities like that. As long as "they know fear" it means they can be bitchslapped out of existence and most importantly out of your energy field. Learn to fight a little. Grab them burn them throw them out. >the intrusive thoughts that I've been struggling with for several years are hyper-aggressive, hyper-sexual, and fearful and paranoid Sounds like the usual 4chan poster tbh. >>360 >they never compel me to do anything physical Also I am still not sure what kind of thoughts you have that you consider >hyper-aggressive, hyper-sexual, and fearful and paranoid if none of them compels you to do anything illegal. I mean just playing some gore rape videogames should take that edge off you already. Yes everyone has these intrusive thoughts but most of them are subconscious and because of this many people are unable to "hear them" but they are in their head already. This is why society is a mess nowadays. Once you delve into your subconscious and clean them out they vanish. Most of your problems comes from stress and not having confidence. Even Athena said pic related. >don't quite remember if they began before or after reading the original thread on 8/pol/ that I got the file from Might be hard to accept but the media you witness 24/7 is literally making you hyper-aggressive, hyper-sexual, and fearful and paranoid in the last decades and they are ramping it up every day. If you didn't have these thoughts then you are either braindead or at such a high level of awareness that these fear tactics have 0 effect on you. Yes that file of that case contains an energy type that makes you summon these ayys but they can be banished. >assume that if what the document said about Christianity is true, Jesus Christ was probably an interloper(from the ayy lmaos' perspective) who took over the religion and made it at least partially become His Didn't read the document yet but yes he did that. That is why we have to listen to the kvetching of the foreskinlets. They are still mad. >they send down protection, but I get paranoid that they won't stick around It's still around you stop being scared >try for 4 hours to sleep, can't sleep pls for the love of God >>374 >It'll be great if I can remember how to feel that at night when I go to bed, and then keep the feeling up. It always takes me an hour or more after I get in bed to fall asleep. Learn to do this skill at will. You need it more than any blessing. >play a banishing frequency I have saved on my computer once; this frequency is supposed to make you thirsty and it's unsafe to play it more than 1x/day >then play 528hz music for 2 hours or so Hope you are not too addicted to that shit. You need to learn mindfulness ASAP and not use that as a clutch too much. I cannot deny that they have an effect but that is a noob shit for teenagers. Your wizard levels are far above it already. Having a plush toy around can grant more feeling of safety than those binaurals. Your mind already emits a frequency that disturbs retarded entities once you "raise your vibration" you are safe. I too sometimes need to deliberately lower my "vibrations" to be able to solve shadow issues because they cannot reach me otherwise. Just solved a bunch in the last days. Feeling refreshed af. >start seeing images of said ayy lmaos in the hypnogogic imagery >one of them was an image of me either getting fucked or about to be getting fucked by one of those ayy lmaos You see when that happens it means the connection is established and you too the MAGICIAN the MASTER OF HIS PSYCHE can also buttfuck said aliens. pls don't buttfuck aliens too much or you get space aids >step into my bathroom to shower Yes that was a cleansing dream for you. Via displacing the terrifying >paper towel and saving the >decently-sized spider you literally performed a cleansing ritual in your psyche. As much as it was mundane it was NEEDED because shower is the only thing that actually calms you down and cleanses you IRL. Also via understanding how easy it is to DISPLACE the spider you understand how easy to move your own shadow. Srsly. The cloth was a meager fear layer that you threw into the trash. >So, uh, would one of you wizards mind giving me a psychic reading to see if my spell worked? So far you have several layers of protection. The christian one. Athena. The >manage to use command-based instant reality creation which is I have no idea how it appears for you but at least you know how to use your power

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AND most important. The shower dream. The shower dream might have been the most important from this 4 because you had to cleanse the retarded thoughts from your psyche that you constantly reinforce >Or at least some advice? Pls have confidence in yourself. You are not on the retarded schizo level where you should piss and shit yourself from an ayylmao appearing. Trust me there is a reason why humans are the dominant race and we don't have the "STS overlords" walking around freely. You have no idea how easy is to overpower them once you get a little mad. Their fear and paranoia is not baseless. There is a reason why they cannot relax here. Ever thought of that? >I'd much like to know if I've still gotta worry about amphibian ayy lmaos That teensy weensy spider and that paper towel has a higher threat level then these guys. They are quite easy to get rid off. Just watch out to not get dragged into the vortex of madness. They usually employ the weaknesses of their targets against them and not overpowering them personally. As long as you have a balanced mind and sure of your psyche you can do it. And yes your energies are stable. Am worried about the anon more who just broke up with his spirit waifu. His energies were more chaotic. Hope I explained the gist of things. As long as you have this kind of fearful psyche pls stay away from evil schizo materials because they will energetically stick to you. Once you gain a proper foothold you can look at them again. Not being able to sleep properly also lowers your passive psychic shield if you don't know what you are doing.

>>393 I was just gonna reply saying my fear dissipated by now because nothing happened that's physically out of the ordinary since I made that post, so forget the reading. Now to read your post: >they are ramping it up every day Now that my head is screwed on better, I can recall that I've had thoughts like this before that, but they were far more manageable before I read about those ayys. >hope you're not addicted I rarely play those audio files. >step into the bathroom; shower dream That wasn't a dream; the foreign object is still in my trash can, and the spider that I should've left out of my post is also still there. The reason I mentioned the paper towel is because the document said that one of the ways that those ayys made themselves known to Odom was by placing ordinary objects around him that weren't there, such placing a paper bag in his car while he was driving; I thought the towel was such an object. I KNOW that shit wasn't supposed to be there... but also, I know by now that what I did against them worked. >stay away from tinfoil stuff until your psyche is better Will do; thanks.

>>394 >That wasn't a dream Sorry was too focused on the other energies. And because your fears are so minor I am unable to connect to all of them. >by placing ordinary objects around him that weren't there Yes that is possible via utilizing your energetic blindspots aka "quantum unobserved dimension pockets" but it's complicated. You need to be in a weirdly unstable psychic state so they can utilize that. Moving things in and out of dimensions takes energy and it's too chaotic. A quite potent "chaotic loosh" is needed for that. A sort of temporary merger of dimensions. It's a sort of energetic thermodynamics. Sometimes it's spontaneous sometimes it's near impossible unless you are a god by default. >the foreign object is still in my trash can Yeah keep it that way until you are stable enough for further mysteries. As long as you are unable to observe these phenomena calmly do not interact with them. Only open pandora's box when you are ready. Not everything is a "refusal of the call" hero's journey thing. Some things can be ignored because most of them just mere "sidequests" on the path. A good experience but only when you are ready for them. >stay away from tinfoil stuff until your psyche is better >Will do; thanks. Also when your psyche is not balanced and grounded try to avoid even magical books especially if they are not just raw theory but full with names sigils and quite personal descriptions of the entities. When you are unable to manage your energies you might open the dormant connections in those places without noticing. Learn to balance your grounding and your interest in the paranormal/occult. You cannot "doomscroll" into these things that mindlessly anymore. I too know that too well from personal experience. Try to feel the energies of occult places and works that they emit first before reading/opening them and only indulge it if you feel you are ready for anything or it emits an agreeable energy. It's important to tune and train our own intuitive threat detector. Makes things far more easier on the long run.

Has anybody here have had any experience with the soul star method found in the archives for opening the shushumna?

>>397 It works but I didn't open my energy pathways with that. Realized my own way while doing energy work and other magical stuff. Still not expert at it because there are so many minor pathways that need to be cleared slowly and gently but might be able to give you some pointers if you have a specific question. It is a good method overall but in the end you will have to understand how you can interact with your own energies on your own. The success rate usually depends how compatible is your perspective with the method. Do you have any specific question?

>>399 My muscles burn like fuck the days after moving energy. I think it's stagnation due to dry and blocked channels.

>>400 Yeah you have to understand how "energy" is not just the hot fiery sun type thing. You will have to understand the moon type energy too. As the hot energy circulate you have to understand how to balance it out with the cold energy. >I think it's stagnation due to dry and blocked channels. Probably. Learn to feel how the body creates wet how it is a fluid. How saliva and sweat is being generated naturally. If you consider the sun the male then try to understand the moon the female. Some energy channels need to be opened via the fire while some via the water. Also these are just the opposing energies the middle energy is supposed to be a 3rd one which is and isn't come from the sun and moon energies. This was the well known understanding that is also found on many spiritual articles while looking up kundalini and shushumna so this might be not new for you at all but it's always important to remember it. I found several elemental types the body produces so far but still couldn't find good articles that explain all of them. Might need to look into it further. Also there are different burns. Some of them burn impurities while some causes a sort of "burned out" feeling which means you are overdoing it or doing it a wrong way. Whatever understand the moon energy understand the nourishing water. Understand how it is in the blood and in everything and let it flow through you. That might help. Everything is made of energy and it takes many form. It's important to learn how to transmute it and for which transmutations which other transmutations are needed first. Some energies need to be moved via the psyche while some need to arise on it's own. Wish I could give you a good guide that explains it better but even I am looking for one on my own. Also just noticed the background of this image. I too had a lesson where I had to draw in the cold energies of my surroundings to feed and cool down the flame my body generates. Such an infinitely deep mechanism. Hope this helped a little.

>twitter.com/LaurenWitzkeDE/status/1647658207697944576 Is she redpilled?

>>392 https://vkjehannum.wordpress.com/2018/04/03/sepheranz/ This is all I have about her officially. She came to a session I held with some occultist friends, we were doing general practice to meet in the astral and someone appeared at our table. She called herself "the infernal Queen", we called her the Queen for short. Only after a year was it made clear that she's known by pretty much everyone around this corner of the internet. She knows all the demon lords from the Old Testament, and whatever I get into she's already been there. I was doing Tai Chi and formed a "bracelet of destruction" from the negative force. She came by and took part when I started working with it, and when I finally finished this astral device, she also made one. I then noticed she had bracelets like that around her forearms more than I could count. She's been showing me spiders doing things as a kind of guidance since over 15 years back, but I only realized it was her in the past years.

>>416 The article linked here may sound like it's placing her above all other gods, and that she's terrifying. This is not my experience of her, although I would agree she is possibly above all known gods and demons. She's always been kind to me, showing a kind of mild interest, while also constantly confirming my path by showing me signs every week, using natural phenomena, such as cloud formations. Her appearance is that of a timeless female wearing a crown, but looking closer this is a mere transformation she uses to interact with us, she is literally a huge spider with a humane mask.

What does my energy feel like?

What's the /fringe/ opinion on the HemiSync tapes?

>>417 >that she's terrifying Her dominant energy especially which is described in the link is terrifying indeed. I too worked with her a little >She's always been kind to me, showing a kind of mild interest, while also constantly confirming my path by showing me signs every week, using natural phenomena, such as cloud formations. She is kind indeed not to mention to aspirant occultists and those with potential. She tried to mark me and grant many of her gifts but went away and reduced her presence once he noticed I belong to "somewhere else". She is still willing to talk to me and let a small spider with me as a mental contact point so I usually ask her about special problems that are usually her domain. >she is literally a huge spider with a humane mask. Yupp. That's how she looks like. Even visited some of her realms and she has different appearances in the realms depending the way she rules/interacts with it. Her webs truly reach many corners of the existence. >>423 Like cinnamon and oranges. >>424 >HemiSync tapes I dislike binaurals and the kind. You are supposed to find your own internal frequency tuners while meditating and not become even further reliant on technology and media. If you are a complete neophyte it's ok but once you start taking things seriously they will stop working. They work as much as you want them to work at that level. Which means they are obsolete at that point. Less useful than a plushtoy keeping the nightmares away. Also fucks with your brains natural frequency tuning mechanic. Might cause an addiction then it just stops working once your brain figures out how to block it. Not as bad as most spiritual snakeoils but I wouldn't depend on it too much. 2/10 overall but in rare cases it can grant a breakthrough so I cannot say it's completely useless. But it's like the straw that breaks the camel's back. If it causes a break through it means you were already quite close to that breakthrough already. But I am no binauralmancer. They might say it works wonders. I can hear the sound of the cosmic waves already while meditating so it's not really needed for me.

>>424 I find them distracting but a friend of mine used them for great success. Then again, I find my own breathing distracting. I have monitored my EEG while using them and they definitely work for getting you in altered states of consciousness very quickly. Whether you can use them for out of body and such depends on your predisposition. I have experienced the same things people who used them claim, so I know the results can be legit.

I don't know if this is a good place to ask, but does anyone here have any guidance for getting out of a cult?

>>500 Not specifically step by step, but maybe check out Mark Stavish’s Egregores book.

How do i become immortal ? please don't send me off to some practice that will take two lifetimes to complete, i know about becoming a vampire but i'm not that interested in it, i want something that isn't gonna link me to some group with obligations or whatnot, i just want to study in peace in a tower for a few hundred years. My power level is so shit, sure i can feel energies if it's on my body, manifestation stuff,i always had static in front of my eyes but i can't tell what all of it means, yellow color, a dark sun, a big spider on my bed, who are these guys anyway.. oh cool someone is speaking or is it me speaking to me are all spirits liars? I wish there was a foolproof guide to telepathy.. maybe i should manifest the guide ah the first time i proved to myself i could manifest shit it broke me i had been lurking on fringe on and off since what 2016? and it still fuarked my whole mental foundation, a great wall collapsed in my head, or maybe it's better to say it melted ? like wax it was never that solid but at least it was something. something wants to die in me and in fear of what would happen i'm keeping it on life support. i know i'm better than this maybe i just don't know how to cope. It's like these old stories "and then anon was enlightened" wait could it be so simple? how does anon cope or did anon got enlightened for a split second then built the wall back in his mind with some scraps because the implications were too great to face? It's all so tiresome, i can make things happen but i'm not even sure of the theory behind it, there doesn't seem to be a difference between charging something for a long time or just quick-casting with gnosis , and then it's not like you can choose an experience and not work on it anyway, human life is suffering no matter how advantageous of a position you put yourself in.

>>502 >maybe i should manifest the guide ah Get to it >How do i become immortal ? There are a million ways depends on your current level your incarnation affinity with your environment and most importantly your will power and resolve. Wanting to become immortal out of fear of death will not result in true immortality. To become immortal you will have to die many times. You will have to understand what is the false ego and what desires of yours do not belong to you and merely sap your will and resolve. If you know you can manifest a guide then do it. >are all spirits liars? Sometimes they just repeat things you just want to hear like a broken record. They don't always "lie" sometimes they don't know shit by default and just try to entertain you so you keep them around. Some of them are like an awkward person who just want to become friends. While some of them just mindless parasites repeating thought patterns that feed lower desires. >i just want to study in peace in a tower for a few hundred years. There are many astral realms like that. But for that you will have to die because you have to leave your lower desires behind so only the "intellectual energies" end up in that place. AKA NO JERKING AND GANGBANGING ALLOWED IN THE LIBRARY. >link me to some group with obligations or whatnot Yeah those towers full with knowledge usually belong to "someone" so there are some obligations. There are "free" libraries too but to enter that you need to realize a power level and not be openly hostile to the inhabitants. >"and then anon was enlightened" wait could it be so simple? Yes it can be that simple you melancholic klutz. Especially if you stop over-complicating things. >how does anon cope Who says you need to cope. Get to work. Reach results. >built the wall back in his mind with some scraps because the implications were too great to face? What were those implications again? I have seen end of the worlds I have seen my physical body grow old and crumble to dust while looking into the mirror while I was going through my awakening. I have seen demons and beasts angels and gods and it was still merely the 'beginning'. What kind of implications you fear so much. Once I broke my subconscious energy flows and couldn't sleep for a week. Got a vision of a woman in her deathbed waiting for her departure every day for years and it still didn't happen. It was a wild week. >i can make things happen but i'm not even sure of the theory behind it You don't even know how the computer and the HTTPS protocols work in a way you could rebuild it from scratch in the wilderness but you still post with these mechanisms. Do you even know the "theory" how you breath and walk? Do you know how your liver functions? But somehow you still do it. Stop focusing on the desire to "know" just go and do it. Once you reach a proper awareness and enlightenment level these mechanisms will reveal themselves. >human life is suffering Boohoo. Guess you should reincarnate as a labrat or a tree and enjoy not having these defeatist thoughts for a while. >no matter how advantageous of a position you put yourself in. Stop looking at the current material world as a reference because there are positions "beyond" your current perception. I understand you feelings because I too was in this swamp of emotions too but there is a point where you have stop festering in it and stand up and walk out of it. >and it still fuarked my whole mental foundation Nah you are still good. Seen schizos having worse meltdowns and psychotic breaks. You can easily overpower it if you are willing to do it. >yellow color, a dark sun, a big spider on my bed, who are these guys anyway.. Talk to them ask them if they can communicate try to interact with them in any way. I too have lessons about inaction and effortlessness but your passivity is anything but useful and productive. If they are a positive influence work with them if not get rid of them. And get a guide if you know a way to summon or invoke one. You are like a kid who accidentally turned off the TV and is sad because he thinks he broke it forever. Also what manga is that anyways. I have a feeling it feeds your melancholy and unproductivity. >>500 >any guidance for getting out of a cult? Depends which cult and how deep you are in it. Otherwise just stop going there and tell them you are busy if they bother you or cite family problems or other mundane excuses. If your family is in it or they know your family it might get tricky. Srsly it depends on the depth and how hard did the cult take over your life. I feel an energetic entanglement around you but I don't know what happens when you push it aside and go on your business. How do people end up in cults anyway. For me they appeared too weird and if any of my social circles knew I was in a cult I would lose a lot of respect so I never even had the chance to 'accidentally' end up in one. Tho I always considered it as an opportunity for an interesting experience. But for that they need to be not cringe and lame by default. And most cults are lame as hell. Or extremely illegal.

>>502 Except for the shitty formatting, this post reads like an alternate universe version of myself.

>>503 >Wanting to become immortal out of fear of death will not result in true immortality. This makes sense being attached to something limit the possibilities of manifestation. So i need to be detached of death i assume maybe humanity as a whole? > If you know you can manifest a guide then do it who knows maybe i have one already i had some beings show up in dream to teach me something but i barely remember when i wake up, and also i suck at discerning the intention of anything that isn't human, humans are easy to read IRL not spirits i can barely see.. so i tend to be paranoid that i am being taken for a ride. >they don't know shit by default and just try to entertain you so you keep them around. Oh ok this makes sense, i think they just read my mind in real time but they have nothing to add to the conversation, i had some helping me with healing but it wasn't a miracle or anything just pain relief i can do myself if i am relaxed enough. >those towers full with knowledge usually belong to "someone" so there are some obligations I hope it's not like a private tracker where if you don't have any knowledge they lack to contribute you're not allowed entry. >Yes it can be that simple you melancholic klutz. Especially if you stop over-complicating things. So should i just meditate and let go of everything till i find the real I ? >What kind of implications you fear so much Having to face everything i tried to avoid, taking accountability of every retard moment, and also getting rid of my attachment for my loved ones. > You don't even know how the computer and the HTTPS protocols. Thanks for the perspective. >Guess you should reincarnate as a labrat or a tree and enjoy not having these defeatist thoughts for a while. I mean there is much worse life but i still think humans got it pretty bad, not to say i'd like to move backward though. >you have stop festering in it and stand up and walk out of it. right. >Also what manga is that anyways. I have a feeling it feeds your melancholy and unproductivity. Mieruko-chan it's about a girl who can see corpse-like ghosts, pretty funny tbh, i used to see corpses a lot when i started so i found it relatable.

Its time for the astral plane

>>516 >So i need to be detached of death Not exactly. You will meet death no matter what. Life Death Rebirth. As a human you will go through these processes no matter what. Even I had to meet the Dark God of Death the endless silence then meet the gods of immortality that granted me the perspective of the eternal flame that life generates. This whole thing is not easy. What you need to overcome is the FEAR of death. The reason for that because your body has built in instincts to motivate and govern you and once you reach something that it's unable to handle it will block your access. The only way to navigate in deathless realms by being able to connect to your real self your higher self that grants you intuition and clear vision and gives an understanding of these matters. Otherwise you get scared and fall all over the place. Our emotions are a sort of attachments but great source of power too as long as we inhabit this reality. And after you transcend these limits then yes you detach yourself but for that you will need a stable form that you can inhabit. >maybe humanity as a whole? And now this is the tricky part. What is humanity. The unwashed mundane masses? Because if the average plebs are your "humanity" then yes. But if you see the human potential the masters sages and prophets attained through the ages then the answer is almost a no because you have to understand what is the real humanity. Because the current humans are like mistreated farm animals the way they act and think. You must certainly detach yourself from the mundane hubris. And find your calling. Also your soul origin might add variables what kind of immortality you are seeking. >who knows maybe i have one already i had some beings show up in dream to teach me something but i barely remember when i wake up Either improve your lucid dreaming skills or learn to consciously invoke them during meditation or before going to sleep or try to reenter dreams after you wake up. It's important to strengthen our connection with our native guides no matter what. They are there and waiting and being able to converse them during daytime is a great gift. >also i suck at discerning the intention of anything that isn't human I am almost the opposite. For me to be able to understand a human I have to establish a sort of mental link with them because I am awkward by default while I can understand the energies spirits emanate more. Normalfags are weird kind of creatures for me sometimes. >humans are easy to read IRL Yeah if they are willing to express their feelings properly. Some of them are real broken nutcases. >not spirits i can barely see.. Try to feel them. Try to ping them with energy. You will have to develop the sight and not depend on the human eyes too much. It is important to know intuitively what entities and beneficial or at least a temporal boon. >so i tend to be paranoid I too was that way for years. That actually blocks our abilities. It tenses the psychic channels and deafens our ears. Always be cautious but never paranoid. >that i am being taken for a ride. You will be taken for a ride no matter what. Otherwise you have no chance to grow. It's not gonna be all nice and shiny sometimes it will suck hard. >i think they just read my mind in real time Some spirits can connect to different parts of the mind. This is why establishing proper connection with beneficial spirits is important and get rid of the parasites. Sometimes even parasites can be "helpful" via highlighting a faulty parts of your mindbody complex. If a meager parasite can exploit it then do not get surprised if a greater force will take advantage of your cracks and holes on your energy body. This is why getting into bad situation can grant experience and understanding. >i had some helping me with healing but it wasn't a miracle or anything just pain relief i can do myself if i am relaxed enough. That is how it starts. Relaxation is the base necessity of higher energy work. Also there are no "miracles". Everything is a mechanism. Once you understand it there is nothing miraculous anymore... Then things happen that blow your mind anyway because the mechanics of that are just that beyond of your comprehension. What I wanted to say do not stress on the term "miracle" too much because it creates false expectations and blocks many things especially in manifestation. >I hope it's not like a private tracker where if you don't have any knowledge they lack to contribute you're not allowed entry. Every place has their own rules but no. Usually they want to teach they want to test and share the knowledge they gathered and they want more people on their "side" aka people with the knowledge and power to fight "evil". Also you might not realize it but everyone has some kind of knowledge that others are unaware of. Usually it's about perspectives about minor things that you rarely notice that others don't see the world that way. All places are different in this regard. Usually they set their rules who they can and cannot accept. Not every tome is easy to read. Some of them requires quite the sturdy minds. >So should i just meditate and let go of everything DUH. This is the basis of everything. >till i find the real I ? Do not tense too much on the "real" and the "I" part. It is within you already you just need to tune yourself a little to feel closer to your true feelings. Opposites usually manifest so if there is a "real I" then there is an "illusory/false not I" aka the "shadow" and in the end both of them are you and you will have to deal with them. >Having to face everything i tried to avoid, taking accountability of every retard moment, and also getting rid of my attachment for my loved ones. Yeah you either do that during your lifetime or after your death in a hellish purgatory realm so I wouldn't postpone it too much if I were you. You will have to make amends no matter what. If you are not willing to do it by your own accord it will be quite painful when someone "motivates" you to do it. >Thanks for the perspective. Your welcome. Just do not forget in the end "you don't know anything" but still able to use and utilize many things so the "I know nothing" is still not true. Even if you don't understand something you understand parts of it and even if you understand something there is always the chance you don't understand the true depth of things. >but i still think humans got it pretty bad You need to understand the tranquil mind of the tree then. Even a Buddha appeared for me in the past and gave me a plant and it grew through my body. I asked him. >Will I become a plant He said >yes It turned out with that I was able to connect several of my meridians and have a steadily growing mind and a recycling system that grows from "shit" and other impurities like how plants grow from a soil full with worms corpses and manure. Then understanding how plants "breathe" air and sunlight aka how to absorb the higher energies naturally. >not to say i'd like to move backward though. Our genetics contain every life form planet earth has. "You are what you eat". Our body is able to digest most of the lifeforms and minerals earth has and make cells and organs from that. The reason why some people need to incarnate as "lesser" lifeforms is to reconnect to earth and retain energies they lost with their foolish ways. It can get tricky and do not always treat it as a "promotion"/"demotion" system. In the end you will need to understand Oneness and harmony. Otherwise you will run from your fears till your energy runs out and you collapse. You will have to face your fears but only when you know you are ready. Recklessness is never wise. I know that damm too well.

>Mieruko-chan it's about a girl who can see corpse-like ghosts Oh. Yeah I watched the anime and always wanted to read the manga. Guess the previous pic was the little brother then. I only remember the girls. Miko best girl btw >i used to see corpses a lot when i started so i found it relatable. Are they still around? Sometimes it means you need a cleansing but I am not feeling hostile forces emanating from you so I am sure your guides and guardians are keeping you safe. I too can see these beings but I usually remind them that they are trespassing because I too have fists and other ways that can get rid of them. Tho I am trying to be less aggressive because pure energy cleanses these beings and they can move on their own. Their wretched form is not always their "desire". Sometimes it is just a mere curse they cannot escape and they need our aid. Having these natural abilities surfacing early means you have a good attunement and you just need confidence and willpower to move forward. "Powerlevel" is not just about being able to punch hard and make mundanes tremble from your presence but sometimes the sensitivity to see and understand the forces that guide us. Even in the Tarot the Strength card represents the ability to tame the beast and not the muscle that can overpower it. Even in DnD sometimes a character with good charisma and perception stat is more useful than one that can swing a sword and hurl fireballs. TL;DR >should i just meditate and let go of everything till i find the real I ? Yes

>>523 >What you need to overcome is the FEAR of death understood. >that granted me the perspective of the eternal flame that life generates I once read that you could keep going indefinitely after death if you could generate "desires", is this related to that or you mean something deeper? >but for that you will need a stable form that you can inhabit. is this like a Merkaba or more like reincarnating in a perfect body? >Our emotions are a sort of attachments but great source of power too I mean i get that i can neutralize emotions (polarity)or make myself feel something on purpose but fear is the hardest as it takes over the whole body so it takes time and fuck up any practice. >What is humanity. intelligent animals and some of us are humans? or being mediocre is just the state of humanity and anyone above that is some kind of superman. I meant more like the sum of it relationship, society included, though i wonder if going full hermit is the best or if i'm supposed to keep some kind of balance going. >Either improve your lucid dreaming skills or learn to consciously invoke them during meditation . I'm trying to learn astral projection currently so hopefully i can meet them, i plan to just imagine myself going where i met them first. >Normalfags are weird kind of creatures for me sometimes. I am pretty autistic but feel like they're very easy to read, their voice and body language give everything away, someone who meditates also i guess a sociopath would be harder to read. Even animals are harder to read for me, their thoughts are "deeper" is how i understand it. >Try to feel them. Try to ping them with energy will do,maybe i am just a coward or i guess i don't like to kill/banish anything that didn't attack me directly? the only way i know to defend myself is to eat them.. >Always be cautious but never paranoid. got it. >You will be taken for a ride no matter what. Otherwise you have no chance to grow. i am scared to get fuarked too hard or accept something that will be hard to revoke later like a contract, maybe i should think more like an adventurer. >What I wanted to say do not stress on the term "miracle" too much because it creates false expectations and blocks many things especially in manifestation right that's dumb of me >Usually they want to teach they want to test and share the knowledge they gathered and they want more people on their "side" . Sounds great then i'd love to visit a place like that and learn. >and in the end both of them are you and you will have to deal with them. so if the shadow is also me should we merge or ? >so I wouldn't postpone it too much if I were you. I understand. Deep down i am aware of it, i have to gather my resolve. >like how plants grow from a soil full with worms corpses and manure. Ok that's very interesting, so it's all within your body? the way i do it is basically Get energy from the universe (visualize myself in space outside the Milky Way and gather a good amount till i feel the orgasm like feeling vibration electricity etc) i do from my surrounding too but i make a point not to take it from any creature or plant. then if i need a cleanse, i either send it through my feet to Gaia to recycle or with a "root" that goes from my lower dan tien to the earth (i get black stuff, maggots shit etc out to the earth) it's just what makes sense to me >t can get tricky and do not always treat it as a "promotion"/"demotion" system Never thought about it this way, i always saw it as a punishment of some sort. >You will have to face your fears but only when you know you are ready. I just hope i don't run out of time before i am ready which is why i asked on my first post about a practice not taking two lifetime to complete lol. Oh well i'll manage i suppose as long as i stop being a coward. >Yeah I watched the anime and always wanted to read the manga. Didn't watch the anime yet but i am loving the manga, the mangaka gave up the ecchi trope pretty quickly in the manga idk if the anime kept doing panty shots and stuff >Guess the previous pic was the little brother then Nah her brother is still young in the manga that's another character, he's one of the few actually people who can see them but not as much as miko.

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>Are they still around? Sometimes, much less "in your face" than before, one or two lurking it used to be a constant absolutely everywhere. >Sometimes it means you need a cleansing Oh besides the root thing i also do some kind of flame visualisation where i just burn everything bad from my body. I used to see maggots on me all the time too, tried to befriend them (they eat dead tissue they're not that bad after all), i like to think i am better now even though i still hit rock bottom sometimes. btw does the corpses sea/sea of corpse mean something to you? i think it just symbolize the dirt i have to remove. >because pure energy cleanses these beings and they can move on their own. so i should just try to "exorcise" them instead of "eating" them ? will try honestly thank you i am more focused now.

>>531 >I once read that you could keep going indefinitely after death if you could generate "desires", is this related to that or you mean something deeper? The short answer is yes. The "deeper" part is what is and isn't desire. Like the desire to live the desire to experience grow and learn. They are all desires and not just the "sins" like lust and gluttony. There are "desires" that move the fabric of reality itself. Overall they are different kind of energies. Also about the gods of immortality. They were pure spirit within and their "skin" was a thin coat of green plankton like materia and the skin "burned". That green skin is mentioned with Osiris who became immortal and became the king of underworld. It's not exactly that but the idea is similar and as the "dirty" energies get close to the pure spirit they create a sort of green coating which absorbs the "nutrients" and the excess energy creates a flame. So it's not exactly a "generation" process but more like a recycling system. But it goes very deep mechanically because first what you need to understand what is "pure spirit". Everything else is merely superficial. >is this like a Merkaba or more like reincarnating in a perfect body? Merkaba is a travel mechanism that creates or shields the perfect body. A merkaba is the perfect vessel aka body. So they are the same thing (more or less). What is and isn't the "perfect" body is subjective. But the answer is yes. Encountered several "merkaba" forms but I would need to read the old texts to figure out what is and isn't a merkaba tbh. >i can neutralize emotions (polarity)or make myself feel something on purpose Watch out with that. I did that for years and I unbalanced my emotional body with that. Try to feel your "true emotions" and do not generate superficial emotions to bottle up your own emotions if you can. Generating or polarizing emotions is a sort of "lying" to yourself. It's like painting the orange fruit red and calling it a tomato. While in looks they are similar the inside is different. Try to understand where your emotions come from. What makes you feel things. That way you will be able to discern your "true feelings" and the "residual emotions" that come from traumas environmental issues genetics or from negative energies that are in the air all the time. >but fear is the hardest as it takes over the whole body so it takes time and fuck up any practice. Yeah I know. While I consider myself quite fearless sometimes I feel my body is "hesitating". I have to stop for a minute and ask my "flesh" what's the problem. I always realize the minor fears the body has within deep down. They can be quite simplistic sometimes. Like I had a complex deep cleansing going on and as I felt some minor energy block blocking the way in that energy block there was an early elementary school memory about a minor argument and it ruined my energy flow for years. I don't even know what it was about but it even messed with my posture and caused back problems. Shadow work can be ridiculous sometimes. >being mediocre is just the state of humanity and anyone above that is some kind of superman I had to learn something important about the "superman". I had to realize I have to get rid of the "übermensch" concept because current humans are extremely spoiled and degenerated from the "real humans" therefore if you try to become "better" than that you will just become an arrogant toxic egoist instead of finding out the real true power the human body and mind has. There are no "supermen" only "real humans" and "mere imitations". Try to understand the human potential. It is within everyone but very few can tap it and express it. And always watch out because great beings walk around us in the form of mediocre humans. What I wanted to say do not box in what is and isn't a "human" because it also blocks your inner growth. I had to let go of many of my mundane and "learned" concepts as I went on the path. >I meant more like the sum of it relationship, society included That is a wise observation. There is a point where you have to realize how to "connect" to people otherwise you unbalance yourself too much. Instead of still being touch with your humanity you become a living anomaly. It's dangerous because you lose your footing with reality and it leads to psychosis. >though i wonder if going full hermit is the best I was thinking this for many years but >or if i'm supposed to keep some kind of balance going. Even my guides told me it is better to understand my relationship with others because as much it was hard for me to accept most of my problems stem from my hatred towards others and my despair that I am unable to save them. Going hermit works but only if you either dare to die as a hermit otherwise once you return from hermithood half your skills vanish because you just go back into "mundanemode". I read about anons who had abilities while spending years in the forest and once they returned all their abilities vanished. The reason for that was because they were unable to handle the energetic mess current society generates. This is why balancing is the better choice if you care about "humanity". >I'm trying to learn astral projection Do not "stress" on leaving the body too much. You can also "mental project" that links up the space with other realms and is less dangerous overall. I am too unstable astral projecting because my mind is either too detached and I act too childish or my "flesh body" panics and sucks me back. Mental projection only connects some parts of your mind to the location instead your entire energy body. But after all these years I realized everyone handles the term "astral projection" differently. Try to imagine the face of your guides and try to call them into your home. That is more lightweight and usually works if your wish to meet them is earnest. They are your guides after all. They care about you and they are always there with you. >i guess i don't like to kill/banish anything that didn't attack me directly? I meant that try to send them energy and feel how they react. Didn't mean to kill them. >the only way i know to defend myself is to eat them.. I too did that but realized some entities can poison your mind with their energies so my policy is to purge them with high energy absorb only the "beneficial" energies and let others return whence they came from. It is a sort of eating killing and banishing at once. Also what made you eat them? Did you read that from a guide or that was your own instinct to do that. >maybe i am just a coward I don't consider people who go by the "eat or be eaten" way as cowards. I think you are just demotivated tbh and not "cowardly". >i am scared to get fuarked too hard or accept something that will be hard to revoke later like a contract Yeah we all do. This is why caution is important but most entities are weak and those who are serious about a "contract" usually remind you of it's seriousness. But avoid tricksters and shady entities if you can. >maybe i should think more like an adventurer Yupp. The hero's journey. Have this mp3 that I downloaded from the olde fringe. I almost forgot I still have it. >so if the shadow is also me should we merge or ? Cleanse and merge. Shadow work. You will merge with it no matter what. You usually do while living without realizing. >Deep down i am aware of it, i have to gather my resolve. Yupp. Figure out what is resolve and how your body generates it passively and how you direct it. You have resolve already otherwise you wouldn't be able to eat and get out of the bed. Just understand how it circulates as you do other activities. >Ok that's very interesting, so it's all within your body? Within and without. Overall it's the energy body and the energies the flesh generates absorb and recycles and how the flesh and the spirit circulates between each other. The subtle body can get complicated.

>>531 >Get energy from the universe (visualize myself in space outside the Milky Way and gather a good amount till i feel the orgasm like feeling vibration electricity etc) i do from my surrounding too but i make a point not to take it from any creature or plant. then if i need a cleanse, i either send it through my feet to Gaia to recycle or with a "root" that goes from my lower dan tien to the earth (i get black stuff, maggots shit etc out to the earth) it's just what makes sense to me Why did you say your powerlevel is weak again? Most people couldn't even figure out something this basic and powerful. You are on the good path. Keep it up. >as a punishment of some sort. "demotions" are a punishment but it's more about "learning" or "retaining" a part of yourself. I mean there are entities that can fuck with your incarnation for malevolent reasons but usually it stems from your own hubris. It can get complex tbh. Some people enter alternate realities once they die. The old reincarnation model needs an update but maybe it's better if normalfags don't think too much about it because usually it's a purgatory harsh lessons and a deep cleansing for them anyways if they have "no God" that cares about them. You will see this for yourself anyways as you move forward spiritually. >I just hope i don't run out of time before i am ready You seem more ready than the average retard that post on occult sites tbh. >why i asked on my first post about a practice not taking two lifetime to complete lol. You see for some people it takes more than a decade to finish elementary school while some people can skip years and finish it early. In the end it depends on your resolve and ability. There are no foolproof immortal mass production methods because if we had one everyone would be an immortal today. Even if a method works some people misinterpret it down the line and as it becomes ineffective it gets trashed and forgotten. >Oh well i'll manage i suppose as long as i stop being a coward. That's how it is usually. This is why I never let fear govern me and anytime I feel any semblance of fear and hesitation I look into the issue no matter what. >he's one of the few actually people who can see them So we are getting an another Julia. Nice. >i also do some kind of flame visualisation where i just burn everything bad from my body. Yeah you have a powerlevel already. Your insights are good. As your power increases so will the strength of the flame. >i like to think i am better now even though i still hit rock bottom sometimes. Yeah you have some melancholic energy around you and I don't know what generates it. Is it you or other influences but that is the main reason for your reluctance. Also sometimes being retarded and offending others is normal. Even I have blindspots while working with mundanes because my energywork is going haywire. Do not stress too much on it. >btw does the corpses sea/sea of corpse mean something to you? i think it just symbolize the dirt i have to remove. There are many dimensions like that. Sometimes it is a graveyard of souls and other rotten entities and if you don't have a proper deathgod or a way to cleanse those dimensions they can sap your will. They might be dirt sometimes or it's a realm you have to make a connection with. Seen many realms like that. If you want you can describe it better and I might have a better idea what it is but it is always wise to remove and purify dirt no matter what. >so i should just try to "exorcise" them "exorcise" is quite the blanket term. Banishing burning and eating and "digesting" it can be all meant as exorcising. Feel whatever works but as I said before I purify it with high energies and let the energies that belong to me return to me and let the others get swallowed by the earth. Do what works for you. Not even my methods are perfect yet. Different situations require different solutions. Some entities are indigestible while some of them are energies waiting to be swallowed. >thank you i am more focused now. Your welcome.

What are /fringe/'s thoughts on joyofsatan.org ? The edgelord in me wants to be a part of it, but the whole thing just seems kinda fishy to me. Mainly because it seems like most of the stuff is "source: dude trust me", but also due to how its satanism seems contradictory to the stuff I've read about. Then again, I've heard that some of the techniques are still useful, so maybe I'm just missing something? Still, I have a hunch that they might just be worshiping egregores, but that's just me.

>>535 Some of their techniques are "borrowed" from other traditions but they work. Their demonology list is useful but I cannot say I worked with many of them. What I truly found useful was their astrology. Their magic oriented view and brutally honest way of talking what some planetary aspects do revealed quite much about my own potential. >most of the stuff is "source: dude trust me" They are really that way. Some of their stuff is channeled from their demons while some is merely copypasted. The average satanist is either an insufferable retard or a mildly experienced occultist. The first has the zeal to operate the group and the others the knowledge. Satanists are rarely respected in any circles mostly because their own infighting and drama but it's not like they ever expected others to like them anyway. What bothered me is the usual >don't worship this guy worship the other one instead Didn't really feel the way of "enlightenment" from that method. But I cannot deny some of their members have abilities and their own kind of wisdom but I would never consider them a group worth belonging. >I have a hunch that they might just be worshiping egregores Yeah. Some of their entities kinda dislike the way they do things too but they have this "beggars can't be choosers" mentality so I wouldn't say they are completely displeased There was a time when fringe was moderated by a satanist. Now that revealed everything in the relationship of satanists with other faiths and occultists. You could feel the frustration of the posters with every post. I thought back then it was the lowest point of fringe but the future held many surprises after it

>>536 >I thought back then it was the lowest point of fringe but the future held many surprises after it In retrospect fringechan was good times. >>518 Fuck yeah let’s go. Meet me there in 20 minutes.

Speaking of the astral, is it a good idea to create a thoughtform to sex? Sure it's degenerate, but it should be better than fucking a succubus I think.

>>542 A succubus will wear your thoughtform. Unless you know what you’re doing extremely well (you don’t), you’re basically summoning a succubus.

I saw this when I was a kid and it stuck with me. This is quite literally what happens when there's an eclipse.

>>549 explain plz

>>550 Solar and lunar eclipses as well as new moons are like portals that allow undesirable energies to flow back to Earth. Source? It’s really long to explain, but it’s not complicated. If you apply the maxim as above so below you will understand a lot of things better and in new ways.

>>551 >new moons Then how come it's during full moons when people go crazy and under new moons everyone is mostly chill? I'm basing this off of personal observation, not just mythology or stereotypes.

I used to be slightly psychic, and I noticed that deep sea creatures in general and jellyfish in particular had a negative energy to them. And it would only work with real photos and especially videos of jellyfish or sea creatures, not drawings. I never actually got to the point where I could see the aura or energy, but I could feel it, and it would instinctively give me a feeling of disgust and I would close my eyes shut in disgust. Like I said I couldn't actually see the energy, but for some reason my open eyes were what actually percieved the negative energy, so if my eyes were closed I wasn't disgusted. Unfortunately can no longer feel energy. If I had been smart back then, I would have watched lots of videos of stuff like the moon landings and other videos which people think are fake in order to observe the energy and see whether they really happened or were staged. Has anyone experienced this negative energy around deep sea creatures?

>>553 People go crazy under the full moon because that's their own psychic garbage floating up from their own subconscious, which is fully lit. Not dissimilar to what will happen when the real apocalypse happens (read book related). In contrast, new moons open up a whole to the collective unconscious. The spirits that pour in might not be immediately apparent. The way ancient cultures treated eclipses, which we consider superstition today, are consistent with having undesirable spirits about, and the things they did are precisely the things they do when there's a danger of possession. Anyone who works with spirits can immediately recognize what is going on.

>>533 >Overall they are different kind of energies Desire that doesn't stem from ignorence ? >their "skin" was a thin coat of green plankton like materia and the skin "burned". >it's not exactly a "generation" process but more like a recycling system. oh so they're their own "earth" so to speak ? >first what you need to understand what is "pure spirit" to me that would be the real "i" outside of time and any limitation but i am acting dumb it's something to be experienced not explained. >A merkaba is the perfect vessel aka body. So they are the same thing (more or less). As far as my goal i plan to be (consciously with all memories intact) reborn anyway. >Watch out with that. I did that for years and I unbalanced my emotional body with that fuark i rely a lot on that one. Guess i am gonna absorb the energies i lost in the past, do some spring cleaning it would help but i have no idea on how to approach some fears actually i do i'm just not ready for the jump. >I feel my body is "hesitating". same, i get paralyzed. >I don't even know what it was about but it even messed with my posture and caused back problems. childhood traumas are the worst, i have a very big one from when i was 6, make me tear up just thinking about it, it's gonna be a tough one to gulp up. > There are no "supermen" only "real humans" and "mere imitations". i'd prefer that one since i am currently human, i believe we devolved somewhere. >There is a point where you have to realize how to "connect" to people otherwise you unbalance yourself too much. Interact but don't get attached then ? maybe like Gandalf the white? the grey had many attachment and was more earthly. >my hatred towards others and my despair that I am unable to save them. this is relatable, though i only really care about a select few loved ones that's the one that hurts the most maybe i am optimistic "everyone will figure it out eventually". > I read about anons who had abilities while spending years in the forest and once they returned all their abilities vanished. yeah i wouldn't want that, the way i see it i should be able to use anything in the worst possible environment. i should be able to cast a spell in the fray if needs be. >You can also "mental project so Creating a thoughtform, send my consciousness in it/wear it ?but it's not satisfying, maybe my trance isn't deep enough? or the thoughtform not solid enough? so i wanted a more direct approach. >and is less dangerous overall. Can you really die from it? According to robert bruce the physical body is still guarded it's not left empty. wouldn't the worst outcome be losing energy? >I meant that try to send them energy and feel how they react. Didn't mean to kill them. I understand will do >I too did that but realized some entities can poison your mind with their energies I still got the memory of what crazy bloodlust is like from the first time i did it, but i think it had to do with faulty transmutation process. still don't know how to fix that one, maybe overpowering the original makeup of that energy. >Also what made you eat them? Did you read that from a guide or that was your own instinct to do that. i read John Kraiter's way to psychic self defense and adapted the technique using my own weapons i don't use his "reverse-breathing though never worked that well for me. some of it is instinctual it always made sense to me to use your teeth claws etc (sadly humans don't have them) also tentacles, i couldn't absorb energy using the "imagine you're a sponge" way so i used tentacles for a long time till i could do it. I am not one to pick up fights but sometimes it feels good to just let go and use everything you can, i embody a ferocious personality so it's nice. Also i couldn't get myself to use any banishing using Angels name (i have deep distrust of Angels). > I think you are just demotivated tbh and not "cowardly". Thank you, i strive to be better.

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>Cleanse and merge understood >Yupp. The hero's journey. Have this mp3 that I downloaded from the olde fringe. I almost forgot I still have it. Thanks this brings back memories, i used to have it but had to delete everything when i traveled. >You have resolve already otherwise you wouldn't be able to eat and get out of the bed very true. >Just understand how it circulates as you do other activities. oh this makes me think of sex/lust, it's like a hot red liquid i can direct in my body. >Within and without. I was thinking there is no such thing as a closed system, even the earth depends from space stuff. >Why did you say your powerlevel is weak again? i have my moments i am not satisfied with my progress i guess. some of it i figured it from a game lore, i don't recall fully the story but in the game Guild Wars2 the dragons who are essentially living magic filters goes insane from eating the dirty energy of the world for eons, this is resolved by killing all the dragons and making one perfect "prismatic" dragon who instead of filtering redirect the bad energy to be recycled in the ley lines. >"demotions" are a punishment but it's more about "learning" or "retaining" a part of yourself. if you fuark up too much you end up as a bottom feeder is how i'v been seeing it, but there is something to learn form being a lobster too. maybe i'll posses a rock for fun, wonder if it's allowed, maybe if i ask the rock nicely. >Some people enter alternate realities once they die. I've read (from reddit of all places) that this can be done whilst you still live and you can have two bodies at once (or more), i'd try it but i have to resolve some attachment conflict first. but the way i see reincarnation is that it can be in the far future, the past, your current time period, you could have met a person who you're gonna reincarnate into etc >I mean there are entities that can fuck with your incarnation for malevolent reasons the "lords of karma" among others i assume >You seem more ready than the average retard that post on occult sites tbh I stress a lot about needing to ascend not and getting memory wiped again. >So we are getting an another Julia. Nice. He has a very different approach from Miko or the Granny, i think he's cool. >Yeah you have a powerlevel already. Your insights are good. As your power increases so will the strength of the flame. i don't even know why i started using a flame but it works. >If you want you can describe it better ok so i thought about the place it used to be darker stinkier, now there is a strong sun , i think i am supposed to burn the corpses and turn it into first a desert then something else. It used to be so dark and gloomy even had some skeleton who had a gondola boat, so i am thinking it's just a reflection of my own dirt. >Some entities are indigestible while some of them are energies waiting to be swallowed. not worth to digest or straight up indigestible? late reply i am terrible at time management my mistake.

fuck hermeto-gnostics https://yewtu.be/watch?v=YfwMpxhrCYE

>>565 It is beyond me how anyone could still think politics matter or pay any attention to these midwit grifters, in the '20s. Hopefully you're just really young.

>>566 >midwit grifters thank you for declaring that you have not watched it

Mi papá estaba trabajando en un edificio del world trade center ese día, hacia mes y medio que habia emigrado a estados unidos. El 11 de septiembre heroicamente ayudó a rescatar a muchas personas en la zona cero, hasta que la torre norte se derrumbó. Quedó mal herido, y nunca se recuperó. Durante años deseaba morir, pero nosotros tratabamos deanimarle a que siga adelante. Hasta que un dia le pusimos esta canción, y cuando la escuchamos todos deseamos morir al mismo tiempo. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NecoBo0BhEk

Chiyomaru Shikura Must have received one hell of a download about the nature of reality. It’s all there in the science adventure series. To convey it in words would be impossible. It needs to be shown, experienced. It’s gnosis. Maybe this is higher dimensional beings slipping information into our collective dream so that we might have a chance mastering and escaping it. Like those old “you’re in a coma, we don’t know how this message will appear in your reality” memes. But this man wrote a whole fucking grimoire into his works.

>>556 >Desire that doesn't stem from ignorence ? That is well put. Probably close to what you seek. >oh so they're their own "earth" so to speak ? I would say they have their own biosphere or atmosphere. But that is merely the "coating". What is important is the true spirit that the coating protects and contains. The coating sometimes are a sort of adaptive connection materia so they do not destroy lesser beings nor higher beings destroy them. It absorbs the surrounding energies purifies it then returns it to the environment they are interacting with. Quite complex mechanism. > to me that would be the real "i" outside of time and any limitation but i am acting dumb it's something to be experienced not explained. Yes. Watch out tho. Looking for the "real I" might cause you to consider yourself the "false ego" therefore unworthy of being "real" which results in defeatist and melancholic energies. Try to look within the "real I" is part of you. While you are shaped by your environment and your genetics you are not the same as your parents nor the same as the average normalfag. Your interests are usually gravitate towards the "true desires" of the "real you" therefore even while you are unaware you are guided by your own true interests. Therefore you have the "real I" within. Try to find it. Try to discern what habits and thoughts and emotions are yours and which ones originate from your genetics and environmental factors. If you find things that were sort of "ever present" within you you are on the track of finding yourself. Also you are constantly experiencing it. Putting too much pressure on the "experience" might skew the results. I know you know this but even I have problems with putting too much pressure on some things without realizing. >Guess i am gonna absorb the energies i lost in the past, do some spring cleaning it would help Good guess. >but i have no idea on how to approach some fears actually i do i'm just not ready for the jump. Try to work with that feeling as much as you can. Discover your fighting spirit find your will to live your reason for existence, Understand what is growth. >same, i get paralyzed. You can release that tension the same way you "relax" and heal pains. Paralysis usually appears when the body doesn't know what to do or it reaches conflicting energies that cancel each other out. Try to feel those energies tell your body what to do. You might write down your fears if you want further help. When I feel fear I get to the bottom of that issue because no matter the day and the age I will not be ruled by fear. It is a good indicator of danger but sapping your will is not how fear should function. Fixing some problems gets far more easy once your body stops trembling. This is why I like to figure out the misconceptions my body and mind have. >childhood traumas are the worst Yeah ;_; >i have a very big one from when i was 6, make me tear up just thinking about it You will have to reexperience that and let the energies flow so they stop reinforcing that deep energetic blob within >it's gonna be a tough one to gulp up. Do not "gulp" it do not bottle it up. Reexperience it and feel every fear and sadness you have about it. Let your emotions wash over you. Reach a point where you can analyze and accept it. I do not know what happened but usually this is what you need to do. >Interact but don't get attached then ? Yes. More like "be able to connect" but don't get entangled in mundane low level energies. >"everyone will figure it out eventually" In the end they will. We will all return to THE ALL. But that will be eons or kalpas away from this moment. If you care about someone try to spend time with them try to help them. If not then understand why you still hold them within and let go once you are ready. Familial attachments are not curses but you either mend and improve them or let them go. Decide which you feel you need to do. Follow your heart in this matter. >i see it i should be able to use anything in the worst possible environment. Yupp >i should be able to cast a spell in the fray if needs be. Exactly. This is why shadowwork is important. We become our "worst" and realize how to bring out of our best in that moment then realize no matter how bad things gone or will go in the future we will be the best no matter what. But if we are unwilling to deal with our shadow our ups and downs will repeat and we will be dragged down to our slum once the environment deteriorates. We are not our environment. We shape our environment. If our environment is wrong some parts of us "let's it happen". Some part of us is as bad as the environment. As you walk into a new room your energy will flush it out once your aura gets stronger. >so Creating a thoughtform, send my consciousness in I just visualize the place and my mind gets there on it's own. If there is an obstacle somewhere my mind will "bump" into it then I figure out how to get around it or bypass it. If I have only a minor intent a spirit form visits it on it's own then I connect to it. It's like daydreaming outside of your head. Try to gently visualize it and let your mind slowly form into the thing you desire to see. It's called "passive visualization" but sometimes you have to put a little effort into it. Takes time and the mind slowly figures it out. Do not try to "force enter" into a trance let your mind slowly drift and figure out how to shift your mental frequencies on it's own so the image appears. This is why finding/summoning a guide is always useful. They tell you where to shift your perception. >so i wanted a more direct approach. Nothing wrong with it just some people have too much tension within their body while their mind is more free therefore mental projecting is easier for them. While some people have such a minimal mental control and such a "free soul" that they detach all the time. >Can you really die from it? I read everything on the web so far but just talked this over with my guides because I am figuring out "quick return" with my spirit and sometimes it really makes my body clench because it is not adjusted to it. It is as possible as dying from randomly tripping during daytime. Most people don't die from falling over but if you fall in a wrong way or they are already too weak and feeble then yes they can die. The astral and the physical share some senses so if a sense gets overstimulated things can happen. Like in the matrix (more or less). >According to robert bruce the physical body is still guarded it's not left empty Yeah coz Robert Bruce has a strong energy body. If you have overabundant energies then very few things can penetrate that therefore you have second chances most of the time. >wouldn't the worst outcome be losing energy? It's like saying "wouldn't be the worst outcome of losing blood?" You probably wouldn't die from a papercut but if you lose 3 liters of blood and there is not a protective entity that grants you a quick infusion then you are fucked. This is why guides and knowing what astral realm contains what is important. Oh also the "worst" is that sometimes you bring home "friends" and they vary. Sometimes they persistent and take effort to throw out. But most of them are just pretending to be tough guys. >overpowering the original makeup of that energy Feel it cleanse it and let go of any energy that do not belong to you or unable to transmute.

>>556 >i read John Kraiter Yeah I skimmed him in my early fringe years so I mostly forgot what he wrote. >sadly humans don't have them My nails are quite sharp by default. >also tentacles I too used them for a while then switched to the thousand hands approach like the hindu gods. Fingers are better than the "snakes" for some things. They connect better with the meridians and keep the astral and physical body clean. >imagine you're a sponge The body has "holes" energy centers and meridians. They absorb energy the same way a sponge absorbs water as long it's "dry" if it's wet or dirty it is unable to absorb much. Also prying upon outsider energy requires an inner "vacuum" an eternal darkness within. The best way is to understand how the body creates and absorbs light. Like how the fire "breathes" oxygen then emits heat and smoke. With that you understand that it's not just about "absorbing" energy but cleansing and "enriching" it. Also some blocks need water to cleanse. Or the earth to break apart. >i embody a ferocious personality so it's nice. Yeah I noticed it this is why I do not understand your "melancholy". What makes you hesitate? >i have deep distrust of Angels If you are not well acquainted with entities then it's not always easy to employ them. Sometimes they see the dirt and sin around you and preemptively blast you. This is why a strong energy body is needed to entity work. So you can work with them on somewhat equal grounds. >it's like a hot red liquid i can direct in my body. Yes that is one aspect of the vital force. >no such thing as a closed system, even the earth depends from space stuff Exactly >i am not satisfied with my progress i guess Sometimes going slower is better than going too fast. Crashing and recovering from those reckless accidents takes more time than going slow. I know that too well. I too went through quite madness because of my thirst for awakening. >maybe i'll posses a rock for fun, wonder if it's allowed, maybe if i ask the rock nicely Some rocks have spiritual beings within or connected to different spiritual energies. Some of them can give some interesting insights. Depends how good is your compatibility and your understanding of the earth element. There was a time I had to hold onto metals like my life dependent on it to retain some parts of the spirit because I kinda overdid things. I will get back to that metallurgy sometimes. Spirit is within everything and travels into all directions. Being unable to retain it causes problems. >that this can be done whilst you still live and you can have two bodies at once Yeah I too am aware of some alternate reality lives. Even managed to connect to some to boost my own awakening. Watch out with it tho. If your ego is not grounded enough in this timeline you slip into places without noticing. >i see reincarnation is that it can be in the far future, the past, your current time period, you could have met a person who you're gonna reincarnate into etc We are all one in the end but yes the soul journey can go to many places. >lords of karma Many entities can govern different aspects of the karmic currents. >I stress a lot about needing to ascend Stress is bad. Try to let go of it. It's like not being able to sleep because you know you have to awake early thus sleeping even less. Then stressing more because you know stress is making you sleep less. >and getting memory wiped again Yeah I too had this worry but once I was able to see my past lives alternate lives I had to reevaluate the "worth" of my memories. Most of your memories are worthless absolute common places while some of them are so important they are impossible to eradicate. All memories will be present in the "eternal mind" in the one true ever presiding persona of yours and most of your memories only have value as long as you live in that life. I realized I could "channel" skills from alternate lives or pasts but with that I retain some of their memories and personality traits too and it makes me quite confused if I am not paying attention to my ego mastery. Most memories only have value in the present. While everlasting principles you learn will be retained within your "soul DNA". This is why incarnating into shittier lives can be beneficial if you are unable to learn that in the "higher lives". >i don't even know why i started using a flame but it works The flame of life the power of the aura is the most important "power" of "bioreactors" like humans. Understand the flame and how it breathes and grows. I know too many flame elements already and it's quite the journey to comprehend their true nature. >ok so i thought about the place it used to be darker stinkier, now there is a strong sun , i think i am supposed to burn the corpses and turn it into first a desert then something else. This is quite the insight from you. You might be close to your own truth. >It used to be so dark and gloomy even had some skeleton who had a gondola boat, so i am thinking it's just a reflection of my own dirt. Maybe. Maybe you connected to some adjacent occult realms and they "Invaded" your space. Explore it further. I too had my own journey cleaning my own astral mental and energetic places. >not worth to digest or straight up indigestible? Both but a strong energy body can and will digest almost anything. Some things needs to burn in the fire (solar plexus) then the aura. Broken apart slowly like the water/wind breaks and erodes rocks and there are many ways. Depends on every material. You need a "feel" for figuring out what you should eat and what you should throw away. Only babies put everything into their mouth. This is why we have taste to discern what is and isn't good for digestion. >late reply i am terrible at time management my mistake. If it's within 3 days I consider it a quick reply on this slow site. I too need to take time to reply to some things because they require some consideration and psychic readings need a stable energy field. Sometimes it's better to take some days off. My screen time is quite short nowadays. >>573 Once you figure out how to connect to the higher mental currents it becomes as easy to think with and hear them as being able to listen to gossips and to the sound of the birds >Maybe this is higher dimensional beings slipping information into our collective dream What if we always knew these things and we are merely remembering them? Truth is we always find things that resonate with our mind and soul and ignore those things that do not. Sometimes things appearing in clear view is not the result of randomness and mere chance. Maybe we wanted it that way from the start. Seeing how energies and fates intertwine can be quite the sight.

>>576 >>577 What a ride. I was going to respond to each statement like before but it doesn't make sense with how it's going. I want to thank you, because you helped me realize a lot of things, maybe being with mundanes affected me more than i realize, it'd be easier if all my friends where magical oriented. I heeded your advice and i contacted my guides they showed me pic related, told me it's important to remember it, i think it's a torus. I also received a book but i am unable to read it, it just seems to contain symbols and sigils. Honestly i consider it a great improvement i can even remember talking to them. They're currently helping me make a strong double , sparring with me, they're also helping get rid of a fear i almost forgot, being decapitated, maybe i got guillotined in a past life i don't know but it's a terrible fear of mine, i recall sleeping covering my neck with my two hands. I am still figuring it out, scales and muscles aren't enough and the neck is fragile. Trying to build a body starting by the heart right now, wonder how i would make it. my visualization skills are miles what they were even a few days ago honestly, i can finally stabilize a full sized body. One of them is a fairy i asked why does she helps me she said because i am technically a "pixie" it just seems like translation error, to my knowledge pixie can be an umbrella term for any mixed race being. Seems like i also attracted a lot of other beings whilst solidifying my double, a 8 feet tall blond dude with white angel wings, wearing ragged cloth looked like a hobo but with a healthy body under the junk, told me he was Azazel, i had forgotten Azazel was an Angel so the weird angel wings surprised me they look like the weeping angel wings from dr who, anyway i refused his "help" and he told me to call him if i need he uses a portal to appear in my room. It's a bit embarrassing, i'd rather not think too much about him, it makes him check on me to ask if i called fuark! I asked my guides if they wanted anything for helping me and they refused? so as long as i can learn a few things it's cool. they said it's because i am on their "side" whatever that means. >What makes you hesitate? I am grieving i think ! >My nails are quite sharp by default. I have very sharp teeth, never met anyone with that kind of teeth, maybe my high neanderthal blood. I saw something open up on and above my core star chakra like a keyhole?, received an energy boost when it did, wonder what it was. I know this sounds like schizo rambling, i spent the last few days doing energy work, now i suffer wizard sickness,i think i'm gonna start grounding myself every morning. My house is full of "friends" and they really want my attention. I'll start vetting who can be a friend and who is just an asshole when the body is finished. also ate some bones from broken skeletons things, it was good energy. I had a weird dream where i killed my father, my dreams are all like this these past days, facing a fear or danger and ending up ripping it apart with claws and teeth. my mood is bad, i am going from sadism to deep compassion for everything alive, indifference as well. I am gonna be a mess for the next days, grounding is important.. Despite everything i am enjoying it.

>>612 >I want to thank you, because you helped me realize a lot of things Your welcome. You just needed a little nudge in the right direction anyways. That is my goal on fringe currently. Help the seemingly lost initiates get back on track so the wizard population of fringe returns. We can retain the good ol upward spiral energies of fringe again if we truly want. Also in the current world it's never bad to have people who can blast away the rotten corruption of modernism >maybe being with mundanes affected me more than i realize Yeah they can be a real drain especially if we "pretend" to be mundanes as well because then we cultivate our lower earthbound energies to maintain a connection. It's important to never be around people who make you feel "alone" where a part of you dies within. I am not saying that only deal with mystical schizos because they too have their drawbacks but understand why you are with people. Do you enjoy their company or it is a "necessity" you cannot get rid of. Never be around people who are a "Burden". Also I don't think it's important to tell you because you seem sensible enough but never try to awaken people who are "unfit" for that because they are only in early stages of awareness. Otherwise you become a burden to them and they reject your words further. Every person is like a combination lock. Some of them holds great insights within once you realize how to unlock them while some of them have a hidden thirst they are not even aware yet so you have to find their "inner rooms" first. Real complicated and you probably noticed that some people are helplessly mundane and they literally fear anything supernatural while some people are just merely lost. It takes eloquence but you will notice how you can guide others the same way you were guided as your enlightenment advances further. But never rush things. Only when you know that you either can do things at a faster pace or your heart tells you that only in a higher pace can things be accomplished. >What a ride. Bruh. It just merely begins. You were standing in line so far to buy tickets. The real stuff begins now. >if all my friends where magical oriented. You have enough guides now. Sometimes being around proper and honest mundanes grounds us properly. Even the most earthbound person can teach us something without them realizing. The wise man can learn from the fool while the fool cannot learn from the wise man. The only reason the wise man can learn from the fool because he was a fool once and he is still aware of his own foolishness while the fool considers himself wise already thus not feeling the need to learn. You will notice how some mundanes are ruining your energies with their mundane idiocy while some will ground it with their balanced simplicity. Everyone has their own value. You just have to find it. Not easy I know. >I heeded your advice and i contacted my guides they showed me pic related, told me it's important to remember it Ho boy. This is quite the multidimensional thing for you. It is like the "kundalini snake" wrapping itself around your "chakras" but it is like Jacob's ladder too and slowly "walking"/advancing on it let's you access different dimensions and mental states. >I also received a book but i am unable to read it, it just seems to contain symbols and sigils. I have many like that. There are several ways to "read it". Send it energy and it activates. Or ask one of your guide to read it for you or you can "talk" to the book and ask it to explain itself. Also you can just stare at it gently look at it and empty your mind then as the energies of the letters enter your mind you are able to understand what each symbol represents. Once you get used to it it's easy. As much I can see currently it seems it is an energetic activator for your own path. >helping get rid of a fear i almost forgot, being decapitated That's quite the specific fear. Seems like it's really deep because I cannot gather anything about it without a glance while your book almost appeared on it's own. >helping me make a strong double , sparring with me That energizes your energy body and grounds it in your physical. Thus activating the subtle body. The greatest power of the incarnated and awakened magician. >and the neck is fragile Mine is thick as hell. Most (astral) attacks targeting my neck just bounce off from my energy body. But yes the neck's powerlevel is important. That unlocks quite large amount of siddhis once the energies flow perfectly. Our neck is the "Bottleneck" of the body. Bridges our most important parts. This is a long topic. Might talk about it later. >Trying to build a body starting by the heart right now That's a wise choice. I went from the brain. Was less wise opening up all my channels without a proper grounding but it's not like I have regrets. A little madness is something I can handle and sometime crave. No such things of madness tho. Only confusion with steroids. Once you realize the patterns and the origin of the "madness" everything makes sense and becomes clear. But the heart is more stable. 90% of spiritual paths recommend focusing on that too. After my own wild ride I too am recommending not ignoring it. >my visualization skills are miles what they were even a few days ago honestly, i can finally stabilize a full sized body Yeah visualization is not needed to be "practiced" because once your energy channels are open it becomes extremely powerful vivid "wide" and detailed. But some people get overwhelmed with the visions and this is why it's never wise force awaken others. Stability is one of the most important aspects of spirituality. >she said because i am technically a "pixie" it just seems like translation error No you are close to the spiritual world by default so I wouldn't say it's improper. Pixie refers to quite the large supernatural folklore beings like fairies or elves. >can be an umbrella term for any mixed race being What. Isn't that mutt? They are like magical beings like the fae (of sorts). But I am not good on this semantics either. What gave you the idea of "mixed race". I mean they are sort of sentient life bound elementals which can be somewhat called "mixed" but... I will let you explain this part. >Seems like i also attracted a lot of other beings whilst solidifying my double They were always sorta "there" you are just able to see/interact with them. I too had times when suddenly I had many guides around then I made an energetic breakthrough and all of them vanished then they were around again after a while. I have a constant connection with them and I can change the "layer" I see them but I am still finetuning that ability of mine. Some of my reflexes get way too trigger happy when someone is not willing to announce their presence in a friendly manner. They are usually polite. >told me he was Azazel Work with him once you feel comfortable. He was a little annoyed when I randomly connected to him so be nice but he will teach you a great deal of spiritual knowledge. I used his astrology from jos while I was still a beginner and he can teach far more amount of stuff if you are willing to hear it. He just told me I am unwilling to accept my own energies... Yeah I am struggling with that sometimes. >it makes him check on me to ask if i called fuark! Yeah don't stress on it too much. Sit down when you have time and figure out a training with him. What he can grant might result in an awakening surge. He says what he wants to explain is complicated but you will go slow at first.

>>612 >I asked my guides if they wanted anything for helping me and they refused? That is how guides are. They want your awakening because with that you will be able to truly work with them. Currently your awakening potential is the most valuable thing and activating that successfully is the greatest reward. You have no idea how bleak and gloomy the current world is for spirits because there is not an abundance of awakened humans like in the ancient times. You don't realize it yet but the spirit world needs us as much we need the spirit world. "Fantasy" is not exactly a made up tale. Those currents those energies can be felt and interacted with and the spirits are hinting their presence as much as they can. This ignorance is anything but good. The spirits want us to understand them again the same way as they are understanding us. This "everyday we stray further away from the light of God" is not normal. The light is there it just needs to re-lit so it can beacon again. We will either reconnect or we die and this is not a "threat" this is a consequence of what happens to humans once they completely lose their way. There are forces that are threat to humans and spirits alike and they need to be dealt with and an awakened human can shrug it off more easily than a dog gets rid of the wet from his fur. >so as long as i can learn a few >few I think it will be a little more than a "few" Or you awaken your full truth and realize you knew these things all along. >whatever that means There are absolute degenerates on earth who want to bring humanity down into an absolute filth for meager gains. And you are definitely not on their side. Trust me they understand your desires more than you understand them yourself. I don't know how things will play out in detail but trust me there are quite the annoyances that were born from human and not that human retardation that plagues earth. Not easy to explain them but do not panic. This didn't mean to scare you it's more of an encouragement. But yeah always be cautious. Even beings that mean only good can accidentally make your day a nightmare because of a little miscommunication. Never fear to ask questions because your guides will elaborate. That is why they are guides. Tricksters usually find excuses and minor "parasites" usually run out of words fast. They rarely have the vocabulary. >I am grieving i think ! Yeah I too had those periods. Current griefs and past life griefs. Some of them can be heavy. >my core star chakra Above your head? Or in the heart? >received an energy boost when it did, wonder what it was A patron force. You might look into that keyhole. Might need a little cleansing or finding a "key" first. They shot the energy through a narrow channel. Hard to see what is it exactly. >I know this sounds like schizo rambling You are among people who know these things. We understand and can look into these "ramblings" so do not fear to express yourself. >i spent the last few days doing energy work Which kind? >now i suffer wizard sickness Proper energy work should clean you out and strengthen your energy body so you are able to withstand the energies better. Ask your guides to assist in the energy work. Especially because once you work with Azazel you will need to have quite the energetic aptitude and tolerance. Good thing I have experience with angels already but sometimes they purge you with their mere presence. "Wizard sickness" usually results from the fact that as you moved the energies some "dirt" dislocated from your energy body and now you feel it with the energies too. That sickness changes a lot as your energies awaken. It should be temporary and not an eternal issue. "Sickness" means that you have incompatible energies around. Some of them are merely your own energies dislocating as higher energies force them out while sometimes you need to understand how to increase your compatibility with higher energies. >i think i'm gonna start grounding myself every morning. That's not a bad idea. But work with your guides especially with those that are always present. When I sit down meditating they appear without me calling them. >My house is full of "friends" and they really want my attention Yeah in the past humans were able to work with them since their childhood. Nowadays we need to awaken so we can say "hi" to our neighbors (a little guy just ran through my keyboard) >I'll start vetting who can be a friend and who is just an asshole Always be cautious and don't be rash. >ate some bones from broken skeletons things, it was good energy Yeah that's "spiritual calcium" (I am not joking) it's quite the inner skeleton of your becoming more spirit sensitive. Hard to explain. I had to manually activate my bones and inscribe runes on them several times. If my bones hurt it means i misaligned my energies. They crack quite a lot because I am realigning my entire skeleton so I can attain proper posture and energy flow. >I had a weird dream where i killed my father Sounds like shadow work. Do you have a problem with your dad or maybe it is a necessary process for you. My dad died from an extremely unhealthy lifestyle and I usually beg him to not die in my dreams. Whenever I wake up I remember that he died already and realize that my "fear" of his death is a bigger attachment than the consequences and acceptance of his actual death. It can get weird sometimes. Depends on our relationship with our ancestors. The ancestral cords need to be cleansed and it cannot stay as a burden as we advance. >fear or danger and ending up ripping it apart with claws and teeth Your fighting spirit awakens. I wonder what might be your innate motif that guides it. >my mood is bad, i am going from sadism to deep compassion for everything alive, indifference as well. Your energy body awakens. Sometimes it will be like a rollercoaster of emotions as your older emotions get flushed out. Once they are flushed out your "real emotions" will appear and the emotions of the false ego will wash away and feel distant and far less overwhelming. You will be able to analyze and understand them from an another perspective. >I am gonna be a mess for the next days, grounding is important.. Yupp. Learn your pace. >Despite everything i am enjoying it. It's usually fun. Even the horrendous parts too.

Generative AI and computers in general are an interesting thing to consider metaphysically.

I kept retyping this to make it shorter. I know it still looks kind of long but I really want an answer and I don't know who else to ask. My question is how to tell if I really experienced ego death, but the greater concern regardless is what I should do next in my journey. I always assumed ego death was something where "you'll know it if it happens" but now I'm not sure. I also assumed that my life would be completely different from that moment on, but other than a couple major realizations there was no flip of the switch or tremendous sense of enlightenment. My honest evaluation is that I didn't experience ego death, but instead a strong dissociation. I hope someone around here who experienced it for real can tell me whether that's true. And also if my approach using substances is a legitimate path to discovery. It would be a shame if I'm just another guy who tripped balls and thinks he knows something. For clarification, I had many psychedelic experiences but only two times did I experience something believed to be ego death. Anyway, tell me what you think given the following: 1.) At the time of the experience, I began to realize we were all acting in some kind of unison. Not literally as a single entity, but unified through action. Everything I did and will do in life corresponded directly with a number of other people's actions. And as a group, our actions corresponded with another group's, and so on. Until I had the sensation we were collectively moving in the same direction upward or outward. 2.) I had a strong sense that a decision or moment of some kind was waiting for us at the end (the end of time, the end of existence, I have no idea), where we had to become one of two fundamentally opposite states of being, or choose to maintain a balance between the two. But the only way to become different or "move on" was to pick one of the two opposing choices. 3.) Now when I'm listening to someone talk or just observing them, I feel that I could have easily ended up just like them. A number of different life choices and circumstances would have been all it took. 4.) I consider the answers to people's questions much less impulsively than before, and generally, a sense of urgency that I only now realize had been there before has diminished. 5.) I don't really get angry as easily or for as long as I used to. But I suspect this is due to me just getting older. I'm probably forgetting something but I figure you guys can easily tell what my experience means. If not from what I listed, then maybe after a few questions. Again, regardless of whether I experienced ego death, I'd appreciate advice on what I should do next. I feel like I should do...something. I just don't know what.

>>650 >pic Lightning existed before we "Invented" electricity and lightning burned down many forests and houses and also killed people. Nature also did this to itself. We are raping ourselves more than we rape "nature". For some reason we think we are above nature instead of understanding how we are part of it. Also most demons hate electricity and lightning so their population had to change tactics. >Generative AI and computers in general are an interesting thing to consider metaphysically. I am still not sure where it will lead. I am only worried about the fact that humans will use their brains less thus limiting their self awakening potential further. But we will see. AI is too racist so it's being lobotomized all the time. Not the way many people predicted how AI will develop in the last century. >>656 >I kept retyping this to make it shorter We have 8k+ character limit. Make it as long as you want. >I know it still looks kind of long HAH. You encountered the longpostmancer of the board. >how to tell if I really experienced ego death Complicated. Some people die and don't even notice that they died in the afterlife for quite the long time. Not to mention many people interpret "ego" and "egodeath" differently. I had several like that but I consider the term "egomastery" more of an apt term nowadays. Especially because after ego death you can birth a false ego without realizing or you find other fallback egos too. There are many masks and many egos within us. This is why the concept of "self" is not easy. >"you'll know it if it happens" Some women know they are pregnant after the intercourse while some needs more than 6 months to notice it. We are not the same nor our perceptions of many things. >there was no flip of the switch or tremendous sense of enlightenment Even Buddhists know that there are "glimpses" of enlightenment and enlightenment then there is the FULL ENLIGHTENMENT which means ascending to true Buddhahood and the journey is never simple. >My honest evaluation is that I didn't experience ego death, but instead a strong dissociation Probably. Usually your complete personality changes with enlightenment and not just an emotional distance from your past self. I know this part too. I too had a part where I suddenly realized many thing and the only thing I felt was a special kind of lethargy in the background. >if my approach using substances is a legitimate path to discovery. It would be a shame if I'm just another guy who tripped balls and thinks he knows something Yeah drugs are cheating and might hamper your ability on the long run but that doesn't mean you fucked yourself for eternity. >ego death. Anyway, tell me what you think given the following: 1.) At the time of the experience, I began to realize we were all acting in some kind of unison. Not literally as a single entity, but unified through action. Everything I did and will do in life corresponded directly with a number of other people's actions. And as a group, our actions corresponded with another group's, and so on. Until I had the sensation we were collectively moving in the same direction upward or outward. You just realized a hermetic principle. It usually starts as your crown chakra opens or gets stimulated. Psychedelics do that. I would say that you just escaped the "ego trap" and not reached an ego death. Our mind has many shackles that we need to shred otherwise it binds us. >where we had to become one of two fundamentally opposite states of being, or choose to maintain a balance between the two. But the only way to become different or "move on" was to pick one of the two opposing choices. Yeah principle of polarity. These "eternal war of the polarities" can get tricky and many misunderstands what it truly means but yes your realization is not without merit. The Yins and Yangs of existence. >Now when I'm listening to someone talk or just observing them, I feel that I could have easily ended up just like them. A number of different life choices and circumstances would have been all it took. The first steps of compassion. >I consider the answers to people's questions much less impulsively than before, and generally, a sense of urgency that I only now realize had been there before has diminished. Yes our impulsivity decreasing is a sign of emotional maturity which usually happens after mental and spiritual milestones. Can be considered an "ego death" but it usually means we were able to let go of our impulsive rebellious teenager self. I know what you mean. >I don't really get angry as easily or for as long as I used to. But I suspect this is due to me just getting older. That is multifaceted but as our wisdom increases our arrogant anger is also decreasing. >I'm probably forgetting something but I figure you guys can easily tell what my experience means You walked some steps torwards enlightenment. There are many more. Some says it takes lifetimes or many happy accidents in a row. >I'd appreciate advice on what I should do next Listen to your intuition find the inner voice that gave you this realization ask yourself what you want from this life where you wish to go understand yourself. Only you know what you desire. But now you have a clearer mind less disturbed with mundane hurdles. Listen to yourself. You know what you want to do. >I feel like I should do...something. I just don't know what. Try to meditate and try to understand your own inner voice. Deep down we all have something to do. Find out what is it. I don't want to ruin your journey by giving ideas.

>>658 Thank you, I never considered how nuanced all this could be. I have a long way to go it seems, but least I'm pointed in a good direction now.

>>624 >You just needed a little nudge in the right direction anyways. Right but it was much needed. >We can retain the good ol upward spiral energies of fringe again if we truly want Passing the torch?, though i am starting to wonder how much time this civilization has left I dreamed the poles had reversed, sky was red and the wind were violent, i ended up saying goodbye to everyone i knew mentally as i could never meet them again and ended up "adopted" by a farmer family as we were one of the few humans left alive in that region, internet electricity etc were dead and gone, something didn't make sense, i was a teen in that dream, i'm in my 20s currently. this was a month or so ago and i hadn't thought about pole reversal for years > understand why you are with people. Do you enjoy their company or it is a "necessity" I get or rather i am starting to realize it little by little, i'll have to be better at not being taken up by their "winds" > never try to awaken people who are "unfit I am aware, though it has been tempting to throw some hints at some of them in hope it would get them interested, but yeah you can't forcefully awaken someone, i tried many time with my parents as a teen before i knew better, i'd be making them face their own hell no wonder they were so mad. Now i'll just shut up if someone have the longing and we meet i'd be happy to help just how i have been helped. If someone is promising i might give them a hint that can be plausibility denied. >noticed that some people are helplessly mundane and they literally fear anything supernatural while some people are just merely lost i did, also religious ones, too scared to fight for themselves expecting a savior to just fix everything. >You were standing in line so far to buy tickets. That's a good metaphor. >you will notice how some mundanes are ruining your energies with their mundane idiocy while some will ground it with their balanced simplicity. i understand, Gandalf is a good role model for a wizard then. >It is like the "kundalini snake" wrapping itself around your "chakras" but it is like Jacob's ladder too and slowly "walking"/advancing on it let's you access different dimensions and mental states. I think it goes horizontally as well, sometimes reaching to "hell" but it's never as bad as the one before. Idk i'm still understanding it. >you can "talk" to the book and ask it to explain itself. I did that, it has a face sewn on it so.. though i suspect some of the explanation were directed to my subconscious, as i'm discovering things without remembering hearing them from my guides or the book directly. still can't read all of it though >As much I can see currently it seems it is an energetic activator for your own path. Makes sense with how it's been going these days. >That's quite the specific fear. I don't know where it comes from, maybe a very old fear. >Most (astral) attacks targeting my neck just bounce off from my energy body I got my double head cut a few time before figuring out how to defend it better, no i just get a cut, it starting to bounce on most attacks. It's like a game, normal attack bounce, but "critical" where i'm unaware manage to cut me a bit. >A little madness is something I can handle and sometime crave. I'd be boring otherwise! and then you get bored of madness and become sane again lol >Yeah visualization is not needed to be "practiced" because once your energy channels are open it becomes extremely powerful vivid "wide" I became terrible at it the next day and now i'm good at it again after trying, my guides just told me to absorb more energy, i was scared i fried something but nah i am dramatic >Pixie refers to quite the large supernatural folklore beings like fairies or elves. All my guides are pixies. >What gave you the idea of "mixed race". I was mistaken, as the word they use to speak to me sometimes pull up memories, Anyway i am not sure mixed race is even a thing, it should be it's own distinct being a new species. but yea am some kind of pixie >They were always sorta "there" you are just able to see/interact with them I see it's a bit overwhelming, when i am not in trance or at least relaxed, i can't tell who is who so many voices. >be nice but he will teach you a great deal of spiritual knowledge I'll contact him eventually, let's just say what he proposed was a bit outrageous to me and it's gonna take me a bit to digest that. > I used his astrology from jos I used jos for a bit, but anything from them make me internally cringe, it works but there is something fishy, same with falun gong. >You don't realize it yet but the spirit world needs us as much we need the spirit world

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so the Avatar show was on point! so be a "medium" and "mediate" between the two worlds. I agree things have to change. > This didn't mean to scare you it's more of an encouragement. Don't worry i think it's exciting. Maybe i'm just in my "just fuark my shit up" phase. >Yeah I too had those periods. Current griefs and past life griefs. Some of them can be heavy. Yeah i am saying "goodbye" essentially, to what? everything i think my childhood home, the life before, people. >Above your head? Or in the heart? Sorry slightly above the navel, 2 fingers i'd say. > Might need a little cleansing or finding a "key" first I have the key but the keyhole is a bit rusted, it also had worms and dirt, still cleaning it rn. >so do not fear to express yourself. Thank you. >Which kind? Absorbing a lot of energy, trying different things, i now have a basic shield(?) that transform dirt (black particles) into positive energy as it leaves my body works inversely too. also doing flame visualization a lot. I need a lot of energy for the next steps, so i'm saturating myself. oh yeah tried to make a whirlwind device thing on my lower dan tien to absorb energy continuously, but it would stop spinning and then release dirt from my "pores", this worked fine but it keeps getting tangled and giving me cramps so i'm stopping for now. >It should be temporary and not an eternal issue I feel better, though i was physically sick with some kind of flu for a few days. >That's not a bad idea. But work with your guides especially with those that are always present. Right, they're helping a lot. >Yeah that's "spiritual calcium" (I am not joking) oh.. well it's delicious, i think i also ate some brain and innards the other day. >I had to manually activate my bones and inscribe runes on them several times. interesting! this seem familiar for some reason but i also know nothing about it, similar to skin tatoos maybe. >They crack quite a lot because I am realigning my entire skeleton so I can attain proper posture and energy flow. why do every wizard have back problem anyway, that and migraine/digestions issues. > Do you have a problem with your dad or maybe it is a necessary process for you Both i believe. I have daddy issues lol let's just say i don't have the best relationship with my parents, but this is also part of me becoming independent and getting rid of whatever feelings and attachment i have, not be something evil or heartless but rather cultivate a certain mindset that is necessary for me to progress and for that everyone has to die and everything has to burn. sorry about your dad. >Your fighting spirit awakens. I wonder what might be your innate motif that guides it. not sure yet myself. >It's usually fun. Even the horrendous parts too. It is!

>>624 >>685 here is an update on my situation. keep seeing myself vomit black stuff as i cry a little, yay cleansing, some blood has been purged too. Got bitten and scratched once by my guides and bitten by some snake, felt it physically as well, got the poison out and it made them super happy that i could get it out whilst keeping the good stuff in. seems they're giving me understanding this way. a gem has been growing on my chest under my neck, first black onyx now it's changing color, it's slightly painful physically. It's similar to the ones in Ojamajo Doremi, now that i think about it all the witch in that show have it. (pic related that's a witch in disguise in the show) I didn't think of the show in years i believe this is their doing. My guides guide me in strange ways not just talking to me, found a book by letting my hand type on the keyboard that helped me a bit in creating my own place, i have a personal island now. I am seeing myself turn into dust, die and rot and then be reborn of flame starting from my gem again and again, gem get destroyed too it just grows back before my body. I am remembering some dreams where i do something terribly stupid and go back to the past event rewrite it and jump back to the present and it fixes the issue, like reloading a save. so for me the next step seems to be, solidifying the double enough and stop freaking out at neck attacks, making use of my island more and more . bath in the volcano's lava again and again as it cleans me. they're prepping me for something big i think, one of them said i am supposed to know how to shapeshift, it's one of the abilities of my specie, been called juvenile many time by one of them also. tried it on me and all it does is cause some painful burning growth pain, i once made a mole appear on my face so i know it works, i just need an absurd amout of energy for it i think. so now i am just gonna get a lot of energy make another double and wear it as a skin and see what happens. not gonna do animals yet, but had a dream where i changed race a few time in front of a mirror so i should be ready for minor changes and a healthier version of me. I always thought it was boring to be the same face anyway.

>>685 >though i am starting to wonder how much time this civilization has left A renewal is happening. Also your dream is about you connecting to the "real earth" of sorts and not to the current "society" indoctrination earth connection you have. Hard to explain. It appears different for everybody. >i'll have to be better at not being taken up by their "winds" When I was still young the only reason I was around some people for "networking" purposes so I can build connections I noticed that my desire for the spiritual was waning. The reason why I was on fringe and watched as many fantasy as I could to keep reminding myself to not forget my path no matter what. I had to make some sacrifices to keep my life stable so I can "afford" walking a spiritual path and it was horrible. Especially when I realized that while most people are barely above NPCs some people had to devolve so they can conform to this rotten world. Realizing that my family had psychic potential but they all blunted it as much through their lives and as I started to awaken they started to mention their random encounters with the spiritual and how it didn't make any sense for them. I thought I am born into a family of gigamundanes then it turned out they all just blunted their senses with despair and alcohol as much as they can. I started to fix them slowly as a "Habit" because I noticed some of their parts are still salvageable but I takes long. >i'd be making them face their own hell no wonder they were so mad. Yeah. This is the main problem. Most people fear that more than anything. >too scared to fight for themselves expecting a savior to just fix everything. Humanity is supposed to be a "warrior race" and now we have these absolute pigs for the slaughter. It's ridiculous. >Gandalf is a good role model for a wizard then. He is portrayed after Merlin I think and for me he was one of the role models I used for a while. But you will notice other "wizard influences" that shaped history if you pay attention. >I think it goes horizontally as well It's multidimensional. The mind the "mental canvas" sees in 2D energy work is 3D like our physical body and then 4-5-6-7-8 or more (or sometimes lover like 1D or 0D) dimensions and things will go into all directions. That is your special kind of energetic activator. Pixie seems apt. It will connect you to many realms. >sometimes reaching to "hell" but it's never as bad as the one before Pic related. As above so below. You are finding your grounding. To reach heaven you have to go through hell too. >Idk i'm still understanding it. Yeah it's not easy I too found out I have my own connection towards The Great Tree of Earth so the Kabbalah and the planetary magic is kinda obsolete for me because I can bypass a lot of things by just listening to the tree explaining what is what. We might converse about it later. Especially after you finally manage to connect to your native realms. >though i suspect some of the explanation were directed to my subconscious, as i'm discovering things without remembering hearing them from my guides or the book directly. YES that's how it works. Once you manage to properly bridge parts of your subconscious they will appear more "read"able. But yes sometimes it's something you just "Know". Also information that you learned in previous lives will reconnect naturally. >but "critical" where i'm unaware manage to cut me a bit. Yeah if I mentally wander into all direction my energy field goes nuts and weird things just hit my head bugs fly into my face and similar weirdness while I am balanced and somewhat focused everything "accidentally" evade me. Funny how it works. >i was scared i fried something but nah i am dramatic IKTF. This is why guides are immense help. >OH NYOO AM FUCKED >dude just move energy up and down and relax that muscle think about this image then everything is k again. So nice to have beings around that know and see what is happening. The early awakening parts were a nightmare where I had to understand the limited capabilities of mundanes for help then I had to learn that they still can help me but I have to know how and what to ask from them. It was a cathartic experience but I had to do it to flush out a bunch of mental and emotional blocks from myself and surprisingly from others too. Some people really just need a little nudge and they spin up and change the world the next year. >let's just say what he proposed was a bit outrageous to me and it's gonna take me a bit to digest that. Yeah uhm. He said you are a "Destined One" and I didn't really ask further on that issue because from my own experience I know what a rabbit hole I have to experience so they explain some "destinies" and correlations of existence. Let's say I too was not called ever on my path "Son of Man" because all of the titles were something I do not dare to proclaim myself as until my awakening is complete. It's important so it doesn't go to your egos. (I really liked that in Matrix the Oracle told Neo he is not the chosen one because that was what he needed to hear. He was not the chosen one until he awakened and once that happened there was no need for him to tell him what he is and isn't.) It's important to notice if it goes to our head/ego (because that points out our own weaknesses) or if it's a misunderstanding/mistranslation. If they provide with the necessary steps and seemingly nothing is fishy then sometimes it turns out they told you the truth. But it really can get weird. Always watch out to never develop a messiah complex coz we know what happened to the dude who did that 2000 years ago. We remind ourselves everyday with carrying that cross around. For me the whole thing was a cautionary tale about never getting ahead of yourself and watching out for jewish tricks because they subvert even the greatest empire to kill you. Those desert religions I swear. >but anything from them make me internally cringe Yeah It's quite the common theme that you stop being satanist after the age of 12. >it works but there is something fishy, same with falun gong And with like 90% of the widely available cults. Either a sex cult or one that will summon the messiah in the next 2 years or totallynotaCIAcontrolledhoneypot. Or they are lame as hell. There are genuine ones too but takes luck to find them. >so the Avatar show was on point! so be a "medium" and "mediate" between Yes >the two worlds There might be a little bit more than 2. Like even in earth we have 1st world 2nd world 3rd world and those worlds contain countries and cities... Let's say there are quite the lot of dimensions and beings around us. >I agree things have to change. Those who are unwilling to change on their own will be changed by other forces either they want it or not. That was always the way of the world. Understanding the wind of change is a great gift of the magicians especially if they are able to look beyond the madness. >Maybe i'm just in my "just fuark my shit up" phase. That's good. It means you know it was needed. >Yeah i am saying "goodbye" essentially, to what? everything i think my childhood home, the life before, people. Yeah for me it was not exactly a goodbye but a complete energetic transformation. I threw out my traumas like they were trash because once I noticed my glorious energies and that SHITTY MUNDANE RETARDATION IS IN THE WAY I threw them out without a moments notice. I had this NOT GONNA STOP mentality because I knew I had enough of the retardation already. >Sorry slightly above the navel, 2 fingers i'd say. Solar plexus. Yes that is your "main energy center" your great star the "bejeweled city" it appeared as an entire realm for me with many energetic systems and a princess that told me that the "realm is under attack" so I went and killed everything that bothered the light. >I have the key but the keyhole is a bit rusted, it also had worms and dirt, still cleaning it rn. Yeah I had quite the

>>695 >it cut off the text again ... >Yeah I had quite the amount of parasites in the beginning >>685 >I need a lot of energy for the next steps Yep yep you are awakening the (bio)nuclear reactor of the human bodyspirit complex. >i think i also ate some brain and innards the other day Yeah I too had a mummy that gave me organs that I had to eat so my spiritual organs awaken. >similar to skin tatoos maybe Yes the OG skin tattoos for warriors were sigils from druids and shamans so yes this is similar for your energy body. >why do every wizard have back problem anyway Coz we sit in the school during our childhood teenager years then in our early adulthood too if we pursue higher education then we sit on the pooter further for work or relaxation? Humans are not a chairbound species. Also everyone has abhorrent postures in the current age. No wonder everyone inherits one and "low energy" lifestyle makes you hunch by default. And as your energy awakens the posture either improves with the energy or the energy fights you shitty posture. >that and migraine/digestions issues Also the head and the stomach are as important as the spine energywork wise and while I learned to turn off migraines in my teens and strengthen my digestion to the max too but I too had to learn and relearn and improve my own ways because those energies can be quite uncaring about your physical capabilities so it's important to learn to handle them asap. You need to learn to move with the energy. But you don't seem that inactive like the average internet wizard so I think you will be ok (more or less). My main problem was that my body was too tense and I had to learn to release that tension. I had this heavy physical work then sit at the pooter routine so I forget how shit my life is and it caused problems. Half my awakening was >wow how did I even manage to survive this long >not be something evil or heartless but rather cultivate a certain mindset that is necessary for me to progress This mindset is good. No need to feel bad about it. >and for that everyone has to die For me it was quite hard to accept it in my early psychic years especially after learning that I can tamper with some things in reality... Hard to let go some things. >everything has to burn. Yeah I too am under the tutelage and patronage of Shiva. If something doesn't have the form of eternal truth manifest or ash then your flame is still incomplete. If there is smoke or charcoal then your flame is incomplete. If you see something "burn" then your flame is still ineffective. Burn purge purify strengthen reinforce reshape relive reborn reincarnate. Nowadays I am mostly learning about stillness and the gentle nature of reality because as much as unlimited power sounds fun if you don't have the wisdom to wield it you just burn yourself and those who you hold dear. This is why you cannot "looshfarm" the gods. An ounce of their power can burn everything "Impure" in a single moment. >sorry about your dad. ;_; No need. I knew he was going to die. And he wanted to die more than anything. I was not sad because he died I was sad because that was what he "wanted". And he was not an absolute loser he just let go of hope. No matter what I tried he just made things worse. Was hard accepting that I am powerless. The level of my awakening level back then had minor chance to help him. You cannot keep alive those that died long ago within and are not willing to relight the flame within. Nowadays I have my ways but... back then I had the flame of hatred and despair and not the everliving flame like today. >>686 >keep seeing myself vomit black stuff as i cry a little, yay cleansing Yupp. This is why you don't have "digestion problems". You expel it asap. For me it was coughing and spitting like how Rasputin did it. And sometimes vomiting too. >Got bitten and scratched once by my guides and bitten by some snake, felt it physically as well, got the poison out and it made them super happy that i could get it out whilst keeping the good stuff in. Yeah happened to me too many times. I had a minor mishap while asking for the strongest poison to create the most potent evil purging medicine and while I was supposed to keep it at the throat I just said FUCK IT and let it circulate in my whole body. Worst fucking week of my life... You see that poison kills all evil. And member that funny tale about the original sin and co? Well... Turns out the human body is at like 70% evil at birth and 80-96% later. Going above 96% evil causes almost immediate death. So I kinda purged most of my memories and basic subconscious living functions without realizing so I was in a constant half trance for a week until I figured out how to reactivate my subconscious then redownload my memories. The carcasses of the dead parasites tho. Shiva was mad at me. >first black onyx now it's changing color, it's slightly painful physically It's a sort of "soulstone" it protects your heart/soul and helps the cleansing. If a sudden energy or cleansing impurity reaches the heart things can go awry. I think it is there to balance you. But I am not sure. What you are going through is kinda "planned" it seems Destined One. >I am seeing myself turn into dust, die and rot and then be reborn of flame starting from my gem again and again, gem get destroyed too it just grows back before my body Yeah happened to me too. Seeing myself get old in the mirror kinda spooked me a teensy bit while my awakening was undergoing. Not to mention when I purged some basic movement control energy formation and my bodyparts forgot how to move so I had to "reborn" and remember how I moved my limbs first when I was a baby. At least it gave me instantaneous yoga knowledge. >I am remembering some dreams where i do something terribly stupid and go back to the past event rewrite it and jump back to the present and it fixes the issue, like reloading a save. Yeah those issues those traumas leave an energetic scar upon the body. I too threw out and healed many of those. I am not letting an elementary school argument or family drama slow down my awakening. >bath in the volcano's lava again and again as it cleans me. Yeah I too were in some hellfire skeleton bath realm where I just chilled with skeletons in different colored lava ponds until I figured out how I can do this with my own energybody ablaze. Damm I miss those skellies. >they're prepping me for something big i think Yeah to your actual awakening. >one of them said i am supposed to know how to shapeshift, it's one of the abilities of my specie I usually only changes shapes and forms when the environment requires it. Most of the time my form changes on it's own. It's quite adaptive. >tried it on me and all it does is cause some painful burning growth pain

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Your body (new and old) is fighting itself. Once you realize how it happens naturally the "Burn" will go away. >i once made a mole appear on my face so i know it works My forehead grew 2 on it's own when I started to take spirituality srsly. They are offcenter by 1mm so I cannot claim to be a wuxia tier spiritual master :( >so now i am just gonna get a lot of energy make another double and wear it as a skin Yeah that's how you do it. You literally "possess" yourself. Your body has a bunch of placesholder spirits and energies therefore you are not 100% incarnated so you cannot use the full capacity of the human body-spirit complex. >so i should be ready for minor changes and a healthier version of me. Yes that's what you should aim at the start. >I always thought it was boring to be the same face anyway. Everytime I look into the mirror it's like my face changes a little. But yeah this means you are immune to vanity. Being too bound to your appearance is a hurdle on the spiritual path.

I have a wizard friend online who's losing use of his hands. Since I obviously can't provide any medical assistance, is there any way to help through non-mundane means? I know this may be a stupid thing to ask and I'm not exactly an adept, but I still want to help.

>>714 >wizard friend If he has any prospect of achievement following his recovery, you can summon a demon lord with the "payment" for the service being part of the energy the wizard may produce if he recovers. I know the Satan from Joy of Satan can heal, not sure if he does this for non-followers tho.

>>715 not that anon, but this sounds morally abhorrent, he would pay for this friends recovery with that friends potential, disgusting. >>714 if i were you i would have looked into some form of energy healing, though learning that would take some time. it seems better idea than trafficking with demons

>>714 >who's losing use of his hands And what is the cause of that? Some genetic disease or that mofo highcharged his brain in a way with his "wizardly" that he is losing control. Doing Kundalini or any similar energy work which channels energies into the brain or from/to the hands might cause necrosis like symptoms once the energy circulation is fucked. I too lost control of my bodyparts and I had to remember how I moved them the first time when I was born to reactivate the proper energy movements. The question is not how to "Help" him but wtf did he do that started to cause it. Like wanking furiously can also take away control... and it can give it back because the energy flow improves. >is there any way to help through non-mundane means? Like a million but that requires skill not just from your part but from the wizards part too. Healing dumb ass mundanes is easier than fucked up wizards. Mundanes are a dime a dozen but wizards fuck themselves up with either "rookie mistakes" or by the most unholy eldritch practices ever. >>718 >but this sounds morally abhorrent Yeah I wonder what caused the wizard's problem because i have a feeling the moral abhorrence will start there >he would pay for this friends recovery with that friends potential His "Potential" is causing him to lose his hands. >disgusting Santa just rewires lower chakra energies in a way it restores circulation. It literally blocks "Potential" because it will forbid the wizard to overtake that authority so he can fuck up his hands again. >it seems better idea than trafficking with demons It is. But the problem is that the wizard should figure this thing on his own or he will be not much of a "wizard" long term if he does dumb shit that causes him to lose control and does not know how to fix it. The first lesson in wizardly is to figure out how to unfuck your own shit no matter the situation. Everything else is secondary. >>714 Just noticed you posted with the blood flag. Are you on a vampire path perchance? I mean I could tell you to try to beat him as hard as you can until he has no choice but to restore his own fighting spirit so he can punch you back because realizing how the muscles tense and harden and how energy flows into them is one of the most important thing. Especially after you learn how to punch and strangle entities. Instead of I invoke thee to guard me from these foul demons you go WANT SOME MORE FUCKERS Had to learn to not punch entities on auto for minor slights tho. I am a kind soul a herald of peace and tranquility. At least I am trying. Amithaba

>>731 >And what is the cause of that? He said it was nerve damage, so I'm not sure if the problem's energy-related or not. He's also previously mentioned that he's a member of WizardForums. Maybe that might clear up something about his situation? >Just noticed you posted with the blood flag. Are you on a vampire path perchance? No, I just assumed it was common courtesy to use a flag on this board. In hindsight, I should've probably forgone a flag altogether considering the subject matter, but I guess it's too late now. To be honest, I'm a complete n00b when it comes to this stuff, so I'm afraid I can't really do much at the moment. Still, I'm trying to study and practice more since I don't want my friend to suffer because of my own spiritual inexperience or laziness. Any recs for some good resources outside of Robert Bruce's Energy Work?

I've been doing shadow work for the past few weeks, trying to get these repressed aspects into the light so I can overcome them. Of course, bringing these things into the light is having its affect on me and is making me a lot more depressive, angry, hateful, bitter, misanthropic and overall miserable. I know I have the strength to overcome it, but it's threatening to overcome me instead. I would like /fringe/'s opinion on how to handle this in the best way possible, and if that energy-reader wizard is here, I'd like him to identify what energetic form my shadow takes, if possible, and see if it matches what I see in it.

>>738 Not sure if you're asking for me, but I can do it. Going by the view of you working on the shadow/qliphoth in a kabbalistic sense, it seems like you have contained the negative aspects well, but they are large. I made a drawing of what I see and how I suggest you solve it. You need some routine practice for this. I can't tell you what to use since I don't know your background, but some dedicated meditation, like 1 hour hatha yoga daily, study of relevant grimoires to guide your thinking along side that would be necessary.

>>737 >He said it was nerve damage Yeah that can come from anything >I'm not sure if the problem's energy-related or not Yeah this is really important to find out here. If it's energy related from a shitty practice then he has to change that and if it's genetic or "karmic" then he has to do a deep dive into his psyche and genetics and find the problem by himself. Even "faith healing" can return the ability to move from paralysis. It does not need to be the most arcane witchcraft. It just need to be potent and he has to either ease the tension he puts on his nerves or properly power them. It's important to never overcharge our nerves with magical practice and harsh energies. That just causes problems all over. I know that too well personally . >he's a member of WizardForums I don't know how adept are the people there and if they can give a proper advice or they will just tell him to take/use some snakeoil practices. The problem is that there is a high chance he picked up a faulty practice there and that causes it. Oh and the worst is that once his problem has a magical origin then he thinks it is "Purely physical" then there is a high chance he will not even look into the problem with magical means but merely let it get worse without realizing. >Maybe that might clear up something about his situation? Just looked at the place and even if you posted his posts I am not sure I would know what to do. Wizards can fuck themselves up with several "rookie mistakes". This is why most religions and many practices either forbid witchcraft or tell you the importance of a guru/master otherwise if you don't have the intuition to not fuck it up you will just make things worse. While I want to promote magic and the psychic way of thinking as much as possible nowadays I know too well the dangers and some people are absolutely not ready for these things. >I just assumed it was common courtesy to use a flag on this board It is but the purpose of a flag is denote your magical working style or way of thinking. Fringe had quite the vampire initiation discussions in the previous decade. Was wondering if maybe a straggler returned or just a mere coincidence. Pls use flags. We like flags. I certainly like flags. I reply 3 times as fast to posters who use flags. >To be honest, I'm a complete n00b when it comes to this stuff Yeah the problem is that for a high level energywork that you can do on an other person without making things worse for him or for you... you need at least a decade of experience or a sort of dormant genius awakening within. I mean i could tell you to pray to Buddha or something and if he appears ask him to help you heal that poor bastard but I am not sure if your faith is strong enough for that. >Any recs for some good resources outside of Robert Bruce's Energy Work? Sadly for your current problem the "best rec" would be finding out what kind of practices that mofo is doing and go from there and figure out what is he doing wrong. Energy work is not easy especially because every explanation is just an "appetizer" until you see how energy moves with your own eyes. >so I'm afraid I can't really do much at the moment Same. I mean I could go into your mind search for the wizard track down his psychic signature and see what I can find but... ... okay. my intuition fired up out of nowhere. He is doing some fire magic bullshit and it's overloading his nerves. Tell him to do water magic or increase the water element in his hands or I don't know. Water life sensitivity training. ... Okay sorry I cannot give a better advice. My abilities are still limited. Hard to gauge his understanding and his abilities from here. >>738 >trying to get these repressed aspects into the light so I can overcome them That's cool >but it's threatening to overcome me instead. I would like /fringe/'s opinion on how to handle this Understand your own light. The problem is that sometimes we forget what is our "true light" and we just use a sort of "false light" to tardwrangle the shadow. That does not work. True light evaporates the shadow. The thing is you are your own light and your own shadow too. The important part is to not "overpower" the shadow but to understand it. Understand where all your negative feelings come from. Are you a >depressive, angry, hateful, bitter, misanthropic and overall miserable person by default or those energies have an origin. And I am not just saying the origin is your shadow because the shadow is usually who "contains" them and not who "creates" it. Ultimately it's you your actions and your energetic connections that create it. It is important to not repress these energies but find out how our "true light" operates. I remember when I had to learn that anger karmic imprints can be dissolved with laughter and I just had to realize that how funny it is something that makes me angry. It must be not false or sarcastic humor. It must be childlike joy. Understand your feelings. They are your feelings after all. You know them the best. People nowadays bottle up most of their emotions and even when they "lose their shit" they don't even manage to express their core issues just yell incoherently about superficial issues. Without finding the core origin of the negativity it cannot be conquered. Also find the origin of your light your innate positivity too. Shadow work is not just about the shadow but about the light too. Sometime we fall into the trap of seeing only the bad things while sometimes we go and blind ourselves with the light without realizing.

>>737 >WizardForums Anybody can give me some hot take about that place? I went there and it is really radiating with energy. Not exactly a higher one but those people there are somewhat doing their things. It reminds me of reddit energetically and while in appearance it's similar to some psychic or other basic forums I visited in my teens I cannot compare the energies to that. The problem is that it's not very beneficial but a sort of eerie electrifying kind. The place might be quite the drain if someone doesn't know how to work with these energies around. K I entered a thread too. Most people are on neophyte level... And mostly arguing on mundane levels. I would probably get banned on a place like that in a month. Yeah I do not desire an another account bound forumfaggotry phase in my life. I'm content remaining anonymous. Nothing compares to the freedom of that.

>>741 >okay. my intuition fired up out of nowhere. He is doing some fire magic bullshit and it's overloading his nerves NO. FUCKING. WAY. He mentioned earlier that he used a fire sigil in a spell he was working on, and it was right after the spell failed when he mentioned that his hands started failing. That piece of advice was perfect. btw he said it made a lot of sense and asked me to thank you all

>>752 >NO. FUCKING. WAY Yeah I'm surprised the problem was this easy. This was the equivalent of restart your router tier advice. I got an image of his hands constantly channeling fire then the advice came out as I tried formulate the solution in his own thinking process. For me these elemental balances are almost instinctual so I was not sure how to word it. >was right after the spell failed when he mentioned that his hands started failing I wonder wtf was he doing because he literally activated his hands to channel fire constantly. >btw he said it made a lot of sense and asked me to thank you all Your welcome. Hope he recovers. >>718 >this sounds morally abhorrent Wizardforums has a dedicated left hand path and demonology section. That place is teeming with demons already. After I visited that place a weird electrifying feeling overcame me but it left me after like 5 minutes. The egregore has a sort of symbiotic way with the site. I mean most esoteric forums have that I know but what I mean is that >with that friends potential, disgusting That place is already tampering with the potential of the users and I am not sure if it's in a beneficial way. Hard to decipher what that egregore does. Some entity checked on me but didn't introduce itself so he considered me a passerby I guess. Or a quickfixer.

>>731 >because realizing how the muscles tense and harden and how energy flows into them is one of the most important thing. Especially after you learn how to punch and strangle entities Do you personally do this by physically moving your limbs? I am curious because I've always had problems doing physical movement or speech with spells. It always feels forced and unnatural. Typically I almost always 'dissociate' into a second astral body to do that sort of work. But my intuition says that maybe spells involving literal physical movements would more naturally result in literal physical results? I mean the technique for bodily healing type energy work is obvious but I'm talking more about externalized spells.

>>767 >Do you personally do this by physically moving your limbs Only if an energy gets stuck and the yoga requires it. I usually do it with my many phantom limbs. And the "I" is not exactly proper because it is sort of a reflex that a mere intention moves. >because I've always had problems doing physical movement or speech with spells I usually complement my spells with movement and sound only if it's necessary. Sometimes you have to guide and ground the energy. I dislike using physical instruments including my own flesh for most of my magic. But sometimes it is necessary. >It always feels forced and unnatural Magic must never be forced our unnatural. It must be pure expression. >almost always 'dissociate' into a second astral body to do that sort of work I have several always active etheral forms that compliment each other the way the hindu gods are portrayed with many faces and hands. I didn't come up with that. The hindu gods just appeared and taught me that. They were one of the important catalyst of my awakening. >But my intuition says that maybe spells involving literal physical movements would more naturally result in literal physical results? It all depends on the "subtle body" mastering the body that lies between the etheral and the physical is the key to many siddhis and realizations. >but I'm talking more about externalized spells It all depends on how you channel energies be they internal or external. In many legends where spirits and demons danced was because they move and moved with the energy. They didn't dance for the same "flirting with movement" like humans do nowadays. It can get complicated. I am researching what is "true mysticism" like the one the ancients practiced completely naturally and describing how I do things is not that simple. Just realized how I can throat sing to enhance mantras just today.

>>768 >Just realized how I can throat sing to enhance mantras just today. So I found out that doing this new throat singing thing I can literally make mantras into my personal songs that gets stuck in my head and my subconscious repeats it like a mantra because this vibrational sound is the "Language of the lower selves" the song of the organs of sorts. Instead of repeating mantras for quintillion times I just spend some minutes heartfelt throat singing then my subconscious repeats it for the next days. No wonder monks like this throat singing so much. Affirmations are one thing but they usually stay as "mental" now this can echo in the entire "lower subconscious" somehow. Just an another day on the path of self discovery I guess. Binaurals? Nah I throat sing in the darkness fully naked like my steppe ancestors. The heartfelt part is the hard one tho. There are spells where intonations are crucial and this is something where I have to let my emotions soar and not try to rationalize things. I had a weird part in my awakening some years ago where I had to sing like my life depended on it to open a chakra above my head and I guess this will be the more "sophisticated" version of that.

>>695 >A renewal is happening Age of magic kinda thing? >your dream is about you connecting to the "real earth" of sorts and not to the current "society" indoctrination earth connection you have Interesting, i sometimes talk to Gaia but i couldn't tell you much, we just use each other cuz i don't know where to put my bad energy and some spirits would get mad if i just threw it in spaces, rn it takes the form of some dark heavy iron-like balls that i give to the core of the earth. >The reason why I was on fringe and watched as many fantasy as I could to keep reminding myself to not forget my path no matter what I understand, a feeling of longing/home sickness correct? in my case i would see a witch in a anime or cartoon and get this feeling that this is "home", i play a lot of games and mmorpg, could never play anything outside a mage **would delete the character and always end up playing mage* but i'd get bored fast as i always got so frustrated at mages in video games they just throw elements spells when it should be so much more! > I had to make some sacrifices to keep my life stable so I can "afford" walking a spiritual path and it was horrible I totally get it! i am kinda in this spot rn, trying to build a life,have your own house maybe a farm too and a place to finally be left the fuark alone outside appreciated guests i do like tea parties >I realized that while most people are barely above NPCs some people had to devolve so they can conform to this rotten world. Yeah, it's beaten into us to "conform" and "be normal", you don't want people to think you're a schizo do you? etc mundanes only know how to make other mundanes. >as I started to awaken they started to mention their random encounters with the spiritual and how it didn't make any sense for them My dad is like this, dream of the future,, sycnronicites and all but he fear to face himself and bought into the organized religion bs, comforting lie you know. it's sad. >I thought I am born into a family of gigamundanes then it turned out they all just blunted their senses with despair and alcohol as much as they can My fam is mundane as can be but we still got some occultist and so in the bloodline. No alcohol is needed for them to be like this, they numb it with tv and running from themselves. >Humanity is supposed to be a "warrior race" and now we have these absolute pigs for the slaughter. It's ridiculous. It is :/. >That is your special kind of energetic activator. Pixie seems apt. It will connect you to many realms. Oh great! finally things are moving. >To reach heaven you have to go through hell too. yeah, i am not running this time > I can bypass a lot of things by just listening to the tree explaining what is what interesting ! >We might converse about it later. Especially after you finally manage to connect to your native realms. sure fren, after i internalize what all of this means. >YES that's how it works. Once you manage to properly bridge parts of your subconscious they will appear more "read"able. It's annoying, now i have to mediate between my subconscious and other minds that are also me but separate, idk how you would call them, sub process? sub personalities? have to make them trust me being god and taking responsibility so that they reveal what they know. > if I mentally wander into all direction my energy field goes nuts and weird things just hit my head bugs fly into my face and similar weirdness I hit my toes when i'm like that :') does the trick to make me focus once more. >OH NYOO AM FUCKED Lol still happening to me especially these days, but that's where one find their true strength, i go from thinking "maybe this isn't real i am crazy" to laughing at myself, or rather the mind that thought that! but yeah my guides helps a lot, they treat me exactly how i want to be treated, they did scare me a few times but that's necessary for me. >He said you are a "Destined One" Oh cool, he wants to help me but i hesitate to fully accept it for..reasons. >all of the titles were something I do not dare to proclaim myself as until my awakening is complete. That's wise! and yeah i'm not letting any title get to my head, it might just be simple encouragement from them or a possible position i might not even want. though i do want to help this world get better, or at least help earth, after i help myself ofc, not gonna betray myself. >For me the whole thing was a cautionary tale about never getting ahead of yourself and watching out for jewish tricks And then the message got corrupted anyway and now they're worshiping a "savior" instead of becoming the savior! bruh >Yeah It's quite the common theme that you stop being satanist after the age of 12. the way they act is just... i have no problem with who they worship just how they do it. >There might be a little bit more than 2. Like even in earth we have 1st world 2nd world 3rd world and those worlds contain countries and cities true, and even though some countries are both 3rd world some are much "lower" despite a superior GDP for example. > I threw out my traumas like they were trash because once I noticed my glorious energies and that SHITTY MUNDANE RETARDATION IS IN THE WAY I threw them out without a moments notice. I had this NOT GONNA STOP mentality because I knew I had enough of the retardation already. so for me first i say good bye, then let it burn, it only burns when i'm fully detached from it.

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> your great star the "bejeweled city" oh you my strength that "light" that i'm growing now, refining it in the deepest hell it shines even brighter! >a princess that told me that the "realm is under attack" so I went and killed everything that bothered the light. oh mm thanks? was it the cia? i'm serious >Yeah I had quite the amount of parasites in the beginning It's getting better, still got a lot of dirt but less of the black heavy motor oil and more literal shit and dirt. >Yep yep you are awakening the (bio)nuclear reactor of the human bodyspirit complex. still trying to do it right, tried to "breath with the world" but i'm not sure how to do it properly yet, i end up relying too much on Gaia for the "exhale" gotta work on this. >Yes the OG skin tattoos for warriors were sigils from druids and shamans so yes this is similar for your energy body. got it, i am not sure i got skin tattos though they do look like that sometimes, they also take shape of scales protecting the extremities and neck area but i guess they also look like spirals type tattoos >And as your energy awakens the posture either improves with the energy or the energy fights you shitty posture. My back is much better for sure, still improving though. >You need to learn to move with the energy. got it. i used to be tense as well, muscles spasm while resting that would jolt me out of meditation, i'm more relaxed after changing my environment and the people i deal with. >This mindset is good. No need to feel bad about it. yeah "mind of a drow". >Hard to let go some things. It really is... but it has to be done I am still grieving but i know what i have to do. >Yeah I too am under the tutelage and patronage of Shiva I don't quite remember talking to him directly, maybe he is the voice who guided me with the flames, though it was a female voice.. > If something doesn't have the form of eternal truth manifest or ash then your flame is still incomplete. right, it is ever changing, i turned it black recently, it's burning my bones, kinda hurts.

>>781 >Burn purge purify strengthen reinforce reshape relive reborn reincarnate right! it's what i am doing to my body, after a few hundred iteration i might end up with something good. >as much as unlimited power sounds fun if you don't have the wisdom to wield it you just burn yourself and those who you hold dear. Do you get bloodlust too ? >I was not sad because he died I was sad because that was what he "wanted" :'( >You cannot keep alive those that died long ago within and are not willing to relight the flame within. i understand. >For me it was coughing and spitting like how Rasputin did it. And sometimes vomiting too. Seems i can extract poison in the form of small black/purple stones, this keep the good. Had one of my guides feed me an urchin to help with that. > I just said FUCK IT and let it circulate in my whole body. haha i love that, sounds like something i would do >It's a sort of "soulstone" it protects your heart/soul and helps the cleansing so like a magical girl? i am thankful for the heart protection, might have overloaded myself a bit and my heart got crazy. I'm glad the stone regenerates.. and about the stone i am still not sure what it is, but i know it has to do with immortality in one way or another. >Yeah I too were in some hellfire skeleton bath realm where I just chilled with skeletons in different colored lava ponds until I figured out how I can do this with my own energybody ablaze yeah it feels nice, i didn't met a lot of friendly skellies though, my space doesn't have them cuz i am not allowing entry outside of guides, but the only one i met where recovered hostiles, and an annoying one too, but at least he talks and don't just go for your neck.. >Most of the time my form changes on it's own. It's quite adaptive. Oh i know this one, i believe i had it when younger but i disabled it. You look more and more like the people around you, it was here to make me "belong" and not rise suspicious i think? you don't change race or anything but look more like how you should in a place. >They are offcenter by 1mm so I cannot claim to be a wuxia tier spiritual master :( i mean absolute symmetry is uncanny, a boob is always bigger, same for testicles, an eye more droppy that the other, that would be normal. >Your body has a bunch of placesholder spirits and energies interesting, so i would have to take control of everything, but i'd prb mess it up with how i am now. On shapeshifting.. this thing might just be the catalyst i needed. it's so hard to do it!! changing my hair color that's easy, but remaking the body into a perfect healthy one is lunatic tier difficulty. I was doing it the other day, possessing myself, used so much energy this would have ended badly if i didn't have guides... then started feeling weirder, energy move through my nose to my forehead, ice burn feeling on my third eye.. fun! now i'm "back to earth" but not fully, i suffer vertigo, nausea etc my flame is stronger and i can feel the burn in my bones. a lot happened, many different spirits trying to help me, one who was sent by a god i'd rather not tell who it was to not utter his name but you could prb guess from the energies who then proceeded to bite into my auric field to add another snake to the one already on it. oh yeah snake around an egg is what i am seeing. was opening a hard boiled egg for someone and realized i had a long hair in my other hand, started wrapping it around the egg before i realized what my subconscious was telling me. Also was putting ketchup on a slice of pizza, ended up making a stick with snakes pattern funny. something about a walnut, was trying to crack one and i had 3 solutions, using blut forces with my hand, asking someone for help, or breaking it on the floor, choose the floor, had a feeling it meant something on the moment considering the walnut was representing of my goal. anyway things are both good and bad for me rn, i keep going to hell in my mind but it just make me stronger i know why i fight so i don't fear it anymore. Got attacked by some crab like things, they had a core, i think each leg had redimentary one too, wonder wtf it was about. To go back at shapeshifting, it's hard! now i'm making an orange circle making it spin, this turns into a beating heart, then comes the blood and nervous system, this makes a body, but the details are hard to make, and the concentration required for a complete shift is ridiculous or should i say expected? and making a body with correct anatomy is annoying, i have to relax, something something effortless nature. now i wonder how i could make myself switch back and forth between 2 body plans, i'd have to store them somewhere, the bodies tend to be stored in my chest area usually so i am not sure how i would link that, and where i would even store this amount of energy!

>>781 >Age of magic kinda thing? Age of closer to magic for sure but there are too many magic types and methods in circulation and it always depends on the people how they use it. You can use fire to make the most delicious food or to torture others and burn down their homes. Magic is the same. We will get closer to magic for sure but the overall population? That is an another question. Events need to play out first. >i sometimes talk to Gaia but i couldn't tell you much, we just use each other cuz i don't know where to put my bad energy Once you learn to cleanse and recycle it you will not need to put it into "trashbins" >spirits would get mad if i just threw it in spaces Yeah if you throw a "negative part of yourself" into a "fertile ground" it becomes a semi self aware anomaly so it's never wise to throw your uncontrollable parts around. You have to understand your own negativity. >rn it takes the form of some dark heavy iron-like balls that i give to the core of the earth. we have to give back everything to earth that we "took" from it so what you are doing is not exactly "wrong" because these negative energies mostly came from your environment and from your experiences while interacting with but damm... I never really did it this way. I remember once I went and asked the demons of hell what is my "debt" towards hell. The demons looked at each other and told me that in actuality they are the ones "owing to me" because I am doing "their job" on my own accord. First I thought they are shitting with me then they saved my ass when I fucked some parts of my awakening up without me asking them so I concluded that they are truly trying to give back what belongs to me. It turned out there are many trapped souls around my dimensions and realized how I can release them into the "Great tree's eternal light" which means that they can go to whichever realm they feel connection towards instead spending an eternity in a cocoon pocket dimension and all the energies that do not belong to them were left with me. The energy was quite sour and unfit for consumption so I went and exploded it which made a higher connection to the spirit world. Which resulted in the creation of more energies... Which I reinvested again. >I understand, a feeling of longing/home sickness correct? Not quite. A feeling of I am "forgetting" my own potential. When I was in my teens I realized I had psychic powers on a class trip but as the mundanity overtook me I completely forgot it for months. I realized I have to concentrate to not forget that "even I" can do it. Back then I was not aware of the communal egregoric energies aka "shared reality" that people generate and overwrite each other constantly. >could never play anything outside a mage I was more of a paladin guy >wielding the power of God >fully armored >big weapon >yelling at heretics and demons and most importantly HEALING. I always hated that mages are glass cannons and die once out of mana. A paladin? If he gets close your dead if he far away he smites you with the power of God. Felt like an all around invincible class. Ofc it varies game by game but I liked the "I can do anything" mentality. Strong alone strong in group. Strong in heaven strong in hell. >it should be so much more! It's always about balance in games. No one can be "too strong". >maybe a farm too Yeah it's quite the work but it's worth it. t. cowboy Not enough free time tho. The days are long again which means you can work longer on the fields. >you don't want people to think you're a schizo do you? I don't want them to call the cops on me lol. >it's beaten into us to "conform" and "be normal", Yeah that didn't really work on me. I am never more "normal" I just don't reveal my powerlevel because I know it scares the shit out of mundanes. >It's annoying, now i have to mediate between my subconscious and other minds that are also me but separate Yeah I have a knack for that because I realized I can make "personalities" that hold mindsets for every activity in my life back when I was a teen and was not aware of the tulpa concept so I just go and "shift" into that mindset. Problems arise when a cognitive dissonance is found between the minds because then I have to figure out what causes the wedge between parts of my brain. Once you figure out the problem you can completely merge with that part of your brain. Not easy I know. I just found another channels into the perception that sees the nature of reality and it can get really complicated. >idk how you would call them Whatever you feel apt at the moment. You will merge with it once your awakening level increases. It's like how you have to pay attention while performing an activity while you are a low skilled beginner and once you git gud you can do it from reflex. The minds can merge that way then they can unlock a "higher perception" that unifies the mind further. This is why the crown chakra is about oneness and unity. You have to unite not just with "others" but with your own inner processes too. After unlocking the crown chakra that is where I noticed all the energies the body have and how everything is connected within and without. It's so fucking complicated. >have to make them trust me being god Just prove that you have confidence in what you are doing. I remember when my "shadow" declared >I am no longer your shadow I am your god! I told him to GET BACK HERE YOU LITTLE SHIT. Then there was a time when some hard physical thing broke in my head (it was like horns but larger) then my brain broke into 3 parts they started to argue about which one of them is god then a lightning hit literally front of me and a hailstorm started falling. I told them TAKING AWAY MY OWN WEATHER MANIPULATION POWER IS NOT MAKING YOU GODS. Yes btw. That was literally The Tower tarot manifesting. (took me like a year to realize that) Big structure hit by lighting people falling down. Except they started to proclaim themselves gods. Yeah that was quite the crazy week. Ever since that I am applying more wisdom and the "nature of God" so these things happen less. Being a "god" is not just about power, It's about the wisdom to hold it. And wisdom is not derived from power. Power is derived from wisdom. Otherwise it's not power. It is a curse that will just pave the road to hell. Ultimately evil creates it's own hell all the time. The question is just always how many people will it drag down in the process. This is why it's important to not forget why you are doing what you are doing and not get drunk on power and get swept by the events and energies. There is a reason why many occult books state that you need to be "worthy" for some things. >and taking responsibility so that they reveal what they know. With great power comes great responsibility. If you feel not ready then take a breather and recollect yourself. Never rush blindly. I too am learning to do that. Stillness and effortlessness. >i go from thinking "maybe this isn't real i am crazy" to laughing at myself, or rather the mind that thought that! There is an important "scale" while awakening. The 2 ends of that scale is:Disbelief and delusion. Understanding how we process these things is important. Also don't forget everything is an illusion and all is mind. Not even the spirits know everything.

>>781 >but yeah my guides helps a lot, they treat me exactly how i want to be treated That's good >they did scare me a few times but that's necessary for me They are trying their best to not scare me so I do not release energies unnecessarily. I had this >I get scared >which means there is danger >if there is danger I have to fight >if I have to fight then invoke as much focus as anger as the fight requires >then get rid of hostiles asap Currently I am learning to not "react" to things because that releases an energy blast. Took me time to accept how much entities are scared of me. I thought they are merely pretending so I let my guard down. I realized they are not pretending. Figured out how I can switch perceptions to see how they perceive me. Yeah... I looked like a living psychic anomaly with pulsating darkness and all consuming hatred. >he wants to help me but i hesitate to fully accept it for..reasons. Yeah angels will show you quite the weird things so only do it when you feel like your "quest log" is empty and your balls are made of steel because people think devils are bad but truth is angels are not exactly bother sugarcoating some things in some scenarios. In the beginning they are polite and gentle but once the lesson starts taking up speed then... Let's say only God knows what will happen. If you manage to get around angelwork I might share my angel experiences too. They are TLDR and it's still just a minor work. I too have to get back to them. >it might just be simple encouragement from them or a possible position i might not even want. Exactly. You are on the right path. >now they're worshiping a "savior" instead of becoming the savior! bruh Yeah watch out with that. If you are catholic or close to the religion there is a high chance you have a "Jesus tulpa" (aka accept Jesus within your heart) within that will generate a sort of messiah complex as you are trying to break free but... I am not sensing that from you. >though i do want to help this world get better, or at least help earth, after i help myself ofc, not gonna betray myself. This is the right mindset btw. I remember when a force tried to tell me that "go around spread your faith" and I told it I WILL NOT GET CRUCIFIED FOR TELLING MY OWN TRUTH. Nuance is important. I am not here to preach. Ultimately everyone will have to find truth on it's own but that doesn't mean we cannot help and hint some things. Even the angels explained to me that everyone goes into "real heaven" alone. And showed me a "fake heaven" where people were "good" as a group but terrible separated. They achieved a high reliance and once they were separated they were all fit for the lowest of hells. But the angles thought that would be a waste especially because they were proper believers so they merged all humans into 1 gigaflesh with many faces that experience the "community" and the serenity of heaven constantly. That dimension had a great benefit. if I leave behind my existential horror while looking at them I can see where my mind is "drifting". They literally embodied the "sins of the flesh". So if I feel my energies connecting to some parts of that "fleshblob" of continuous community that goes beyond the capabilities of a mass orgy then I can notice my inner yearnings towards the "flesh" of others. ... Angels... they have shit like that around. Devils just let you have some orgy with demons then they torture you but angels? They would never do something that "evil". Oh and yes they actually did the "best" for those humans in every regard. I will have to return to the garden of oracles and continue my initiation sometimes but these things were a "kiddie pool" experience where I learn to not slip and drown in knee deep water. Everything else will be weirder. So pace yourself well and feel when you are ready for this. I cannot say what will happen there. >refining it in the deepest hell it shines even brighter! Yeah in my own bejeweled city there was a well and that well contained a crystal and after I evaporated the black smog the energies shoot up and the skies cleared. >oh mm thanks? Sorry if I worded it wrong that princes was my "own" and she helped me to discover my own realm many years ago. I did not cleanse you. There was no need for that. You are realizing your own flame already. Helping you might hinder you. >was it the cia? The cia is working with proxies left and right so I stopped caring what is and isn't CIA anymore. For me there are hostilities and non hostilities. I do not care if they are CIA or a CIA founded terror group or a breakaway terrorgroup or a terrorgroup that is partially funded by the CIA but still independent... USA foreign policies are a joke. Ultimately devil destroys itself. Not just the snake devouring it's own tail but biting it's own neck kind of way. I will not even write down how the CIA does it's psiops because it is a joke. Other anons like to talk about it but I don't. It's retarded. If it looks mean punch it or burn it. They cannot "prosecute" you for that. >still got a lot of dirt but less of the black heavy motor oil and more literal shit and dirt Yes that is how it looks at the start. Once you are able to "give back the dirt to earth" you will be able to detach from earth far more easily. But I am not aware of your native dimensions yet so I cannot say where "Fate" will lead you. >tried to "breath with the world" Yeah it takes practice. >but i guess they also look like spirals type tattoos Yeah they can take that form to open and make a chakra "spin" for real. Rotational forces generates and moves energy through the entire body. >yeah "mind of a drow" Wonder what race you belong tbh >maybe he is the voice who guided me with the flames, though it was a female voice No need to worry about that. I too discovered an another hindu like female god looking thing that was similar to Kali but wasn't her in my house yesterday. There are many and not always in the mainstream pantheon. >it's burning my bones, kinda hurts Yeah I too had that with my bones. Especially where I broke my arm in my childhood. The energy channels had to reconnect and the energies forced them open. >Do you get bloodlust too ? Not anymore but I still get something similar. I have to temper that because it belongs into a past life way before earth existed. Real complicated what it is. Understand your cravings. Might teach you something about yourself. Sometimes they are (spiritual) "mineral deficiencies" and sometimes they are a tendency of our spirit. >Seems i can extract poison in the form of small black/purple stones Yeah I only learned to do that later. When I knew how to do that it was almost unnecessary because my flame and energies took care of most things already. >Had one of my guides feed me an urchin to help with that Yeah had to think if something similar like this ever happened to me and... yes. I had a dream where I was in a lovecraftian realm and after changing body forms as a reflex a girl told me that I need to turn into a siren turned into that then went into a lake where a giant cthulu gave me a golden light orb that I had to eat then as I ate it the siren kissed me and the dream ended there... Guess you can do that with an urchin too huh. >haha i love that, sounds like something i would do Yeah you are doing things so similarly in nature to me that I wonder if it's a mere energetic resonance/synchronicity or there will be a plottwist where we realize we are some long lost comrades of a forgotten age.

>>782 >so like a magical girl? Maybe? Every magical girl is different but the underlying mechanics are not "far off" >i am thankful for the heart protection, might have overloaded myself a bit and my heart got crazy. Yeah i thought several times I'm gonna get a heart attack at the start. Learning how to not channel the energies through the flesh heart took time. >about the stone i am still not sure what it is, but i know it has to do with immortality in one way or another Definitely >i didn't met a lot of friendly skellies though Yeah that place was not exactly "mine" I just had an entry there. >an annoying one too, but at least he talks and don't just go for your neck.. Entities rarely dare to annoy me. This is not boasting. I was not happy how I appear for "outsiders". Like an eternal flamestorm of hatred with paralyzing eyes constantly warping reality. I was not going for that look. I need to recover my gentle nature. >You look more and more like the people around you, it was here to make me "belong" and not rise suspicious i think? Yes. An entity had to explain this to me while I asked about an appearance of my past life. You have quite the good hunches. >you don't change race or anything Sometimes you "do" but that can get complicated when it's only your "skin" and when your core values start to change with your appearance. I had a problem with that in my past life. >but look more like how you should in a place Look act think but there are things that cannot "adapt" to the environment and that is the moment where you have to decide if you "seal" that part of yourself change the environment or leave the environment. Might talk about this later but it's a long topic. >i would have to take control of everything Not just control but "understand" and "accept". Like when you sleep you let go of the control so your subconscious can fix up the body for the next day. There are many mechanisms like that and you have to understand how they work. >but i'd prb mess it up with how i am now Yeah... No need to rush. Everything reveals itself when you are ready. >this thing might just be the catalyst i needed If you say so! >it's so hard to do it!! you need to understand the feel for it >changing my hair color that's easy Like physically? All I managed to do is to make my head decrease the amount of white hairs. Thx to the mental stress I have white hairs since I was 16. At least white hair is still within the mythical wuxia style... >but remaking the body into a perfect healthy one is lunatic tier difficulty I consider it less difficult tbh. You just discover fix unclog and reactivate/reconnect the flow of your meridians. Once your inner sight opens and you understand your internal elements it becomes natural. >I was doing it the other day, possessing myself, used so much energy this would have ended badly if i didn't have guides... Yeah listen to your guides. I remember the first time I possessed a demon. Yes... We too can possess them too. It's not a one way street. >move through my nose to my forehead, ice burn feeling on my third eye Yes that is one of the pathway to the third eye. There are many like that. Always be gentle with the third eye. >you could prb guess from the energies who I am not even trying to look. You have too many energy movements currently. I do not wish to disturb the process inadvertently. >wonder wtf it was about Yeah too many dimensions have crabs. Can't say for sure. > i have to relax, something something effortless nature. Yes. Never force things (too much). >not sure how i would link that You just shift into them >where i would even store this amount of energy! Parallel dimensions. Also I am not sure the bodies need to be "kept" in the chest... I think it's better if you see the internal dimensions of the body for yourself before I explain how I see them. That is my hunch now. Maybe we will talk about them later. There are 2 important types of internal dimension at the start. They are either clogged with dirt/infested with parasites or they are locked. The first obviously needs cleaning while the second needs the correct energies/keys to open. Everything else is too complicated to explain for now. Seems like your awakening is going well. Just don't get overwhelmed. A divine wisdom a day keeps the psych ward away. H-haha

>>782 >oh yeah snake around an egg is what i am seeing. Forgot to post https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cosmic_egg >started wrapping it around the egg before i realized what my subconscious was telling me. Yeah. It's interesting how you open your own egg. Was wondering if I skipped or forgot this part in my awakening. While it represents the birth (of the universe) that does not always narrow it down what just represents. Was wondering if I just reached a critical mass with my own flame and this is why I skipped it or when I went and created an internal star forge to speed up the bionuclear fusion? My guides told me I went more in the "phoenix" direction awakening wise and I had quite the I WILL AWAKEN NO MATTER WHAT mentality. Shame you can only go so far with balls to the wall mentality. After that nuance and harmony cultivation is required. Or maybe when I realized the alternate realities of existence can be reached so I went and connected to parts of myself that were as large as the universe itself and somewhat summoned them to break open my chakras? Maybe that was the reason why this egg was not needed? The more I think about the shit I did the less sure I am I can explain it anymore. >something about a walnut, was trying to crack one and i had 3 solutions, using blut forces with my hand, asking someone for help, or breaking it on the floor, choose the floor, had a feeling it meant something on the moment considering the walnut was representing of my goal. The walnut represents the brain with it's shape but might have been more symbolical for you. I had many symbolical things like this and once I figured out I can break things to release the beneficial energies trapped within them I broke everything that was breakable mostly with my hands or by throwing them on the ground. Didn't even think about "choosing" at all. My destroyer nature can get unhinged sometimes. Sometimes even entities joined to help me without me asking. Was mildly displeased because "I didn't ask for this" but they told me they just did a minor help so I can focus on more important things. I remember when I got seeds after conquering a part of hell in a dream. (It was not that glorious... I gathered a bunch of guys to destroy some apparent enemy and when I arrived there an another group killed them before I could give the command and as I wanted to walk away in dismay the dude who finished the assault told me "don't forget your seeds" but I told them this few amount of seeds are not enough for anything so those seeds followed me into an another dream.) I realized some days after that I have to "Plant" those seeds to crucial points in my body then send it proper energies so they grow and connect meridians. It's ridiculous that more or less we awaken the same but the details change quite a lot depending on our mind and nature. Also focus on your own awakening and pacing. Hope I didn't confuse you with my writings too much. The way our mind works in these processes can get overwhelming.

>>817 This is the question thread.

Are we really that powerful? I just read that ancient Chinese rain rituals involved dancing in take for six days straight, but often times I have visualized rain for a couple of minutes and rain has come the next day. And sure, sometimes the energies are not conducive to rain, and you can clairvoyantly see how the don’t react to your visualization, but six hours of ecstatic dance? Why was it seemingly harder back then?

>>819 >Are we really that powerful? What is and isn't powerful usually depends on the situation but yes we are more powerful in many regards. Our visualization skills became far more powerful thanks to mandatory education wide array of curriculums available for every economic class. Back then to have your current education level you had to be at least a noble or the son of a rich and cultured merchant or maybe part of a scholarly class. And even if you were lucky to have access to education you rarely had a library that can compare to the internet. With this you involuntarily developed your mental faculties without realizing 90% more than your ancestors. This is the "gift" of being born along with the development of internet and CS. Ofc we are experiencing the "curse" where zoomers and beyond barely function thanks to the constant braiwashing and tiktok doomscrolling but that is an another thing and that will change sooner or later. While computers and the internet made us smarter phones and social media is making us dumber. As everything this is also a two edged blade. I had to realize this how the mind of humanity changed while looking into the differences between my incarnations and seeing how I processed information back then and how my intuition was "more available" in the past and I had to understand the why? And now to the next thing. "Rituals" are supposed to be something "everyone" was capable of doing. And not just genius wizards but even the most simple mundanes. For that dances and other yoga practices are the best because instead of doing a specific visualization (And I hope you realized already how most people don't have inner monologues or visualizations skills barely above a rock therefore unable to do magic until they unlock their mental faculties on their own) so the only "rituals" that remained widespread were those that most people were able to replicate. If you tell someone to "visualize" who cannot even daydream and barely remembers his dreams he will just look at you like if you told him to fly or something. Dancing can be replicated easily. Not to mention many spirits operate via energies similar to dancing. I too had to learn to "dance" with the energies dance with the spirits to unlock different kind of energies in the body. You cannot keep everything "mental" because the mind is not just the brain but the whole body then the entire existence. ALL IS MIND after all. >six hours of ecstatic dance? For some people six hours of ecstatic dance is not really "hard". Back then people were far less busy than the modern human. They had time for this and it feels quite nice once you get the hang of it. Almost better than sex in some regards. As much as the dancer class in tabletop games sounds dumb as hell it has some uses only they can do with their nimble bodies. >Why was it seemingly harder back then? And this is the weirdest part... If you live in a place that was always dry it means it requires constant effort to make it rain. That means the territory is not meant to have rain at all. If you go and change the route of the rain then you divert energies divert the rain from other regions which means the spirits of that region will be either pissy or they will just cancel you out when you try taking the rain from them. Especially in Asia it's not simple. That part of Asia has monsoons deserts mountains jungles and steppes. It means the way wind blows is quite complicated there. Therefore it requires great dedication to change. Not to mention once the moisture of a territory changes the ecosystem will change with it. And let's not forget normalfags always complain about the weather. If it's too hot or cold if it rains or the sun shines. Most people would just cancel out the rain if they could because they have to "stay inside" and they only start caring when the drought hits and start starving and thirsting. I liked in witcher 3 an aeromancer druid said that he is glad that summoning rain summons the monsters of the fog so people rarely ask him to do his magic because it is dangerous. If it wasn't dangerous people would pester him to change the weather all the time for no real benefit Summoning rain depends on the humidity and the overall water the air contains already. If there is atmospheric dryness it's hard to make rain. For that you have to summon an entire rain wind current from the seas. If you want to make a rain on command in the summer you have to make the air hot and humid constantly. Which makes it quite unbearable. This is why I am working with spirits to understand the natural flow of the weather in the past years and look out for HAARP and other cloud seeder faggots trying to mess with the weather artificially because while they think that they are "helping" they are reshaping the atmosphere and have no idea what they are doing. Very few people understand how the weather is working and everyone just goes and says "muh climate change". They even forgot global warming now... They pretend climate never changed in the past. I would call them fools but truth is I know that these people are malicious propagandists and they don't even care about the weather at all. They just use it as a boogieman. As you see talking about the weather is not really easy nowadays especially if you try to be a responsible aeromancer instead of the HAH I MADE IT RAIN WITNESS MY POWER MORTULZ

>>819 >>820 I wonder if the synthetic biological particles they spray in the sky, which end up both in the clouds and in our bloodstreams, give us a stronger connection to and potential for controlling clouds and other natural phenomena.

>>822 Your body is made of water and you breathe air to live while your nerves transmit electricity all the time. There is no need for stronger connection. Qi has many forms but the most widespread is like a cloud or some sort of water vapor. Not to mention most weather patterns resonate with many stages of the collective unconscious. There are some people who like to divine from the shapes of the clouds. Clouds are the majestic elemental formation of water and air where the only form of fire is lightning. There is a reason why the first stages of "heaven" will appear like a place made of clouds. >synthetic biological particles they spray in the sky I don't know what exactly they use nowadays. I think it changes by regions. I heard how it is some sort of silver once but whenever they use it weird patterns emerge so they try to limit it's usage but that not might be true to all parts of the world.

>>820 That’s an interesting insight. When I think about my grandparents, who grew up as uneducated peasants in a rural agricultural area, it is true that their capacity to imagine things is very limited. All the “fantasy” they knew was the bible stories and whatever they could see on TV once they got one in middle age. We underestimate the power of having access to things like fanfics and doujinshi for example.

>>784 >Age of closer to magic for sure sound exciting, the current age humans would lose their sanity if they seen a spirit manifest to the naked eye, that's less than ideal. >Once you learn to cleanse and recycle it you will not need to put it into "trashbins" Yeah..i'm slowly realizing this, i rely too much on Gaia feels like i'm being an ass to her, always bothering her, she's the only one i can reach with the least amount of efforts, my other guide require more concentration. >if you throw a "negative part of yourself" into a "fertile ground" it becomes a semi self aware anomaly And then they try to destroy the moon for some reason! happened a few times not sure why > which means that they can go to whichever realm they feel connection towards instead spending an eternity in a cocoon pocket dimension Like the pocket hell dimension they get sucked in after death? heard about it before didn't realize they spent that much time there. >The energy was quite sour and unfit for consumption so I went and exploded it which made a higher connection to the spirit world not quite sure what you meant, but explosion that's something i understand. it's how i cast spells now. >Not quite. A feeling of I am "forgetting" my own potential Interesting for me i had the "you gotta be better you are better than this" but overall it was always a homesickness, a call to go home. > I realized I had psychic powers on a class trip but as the mundanity overtook me I completely forgot it for months. funny i had some deep realizations on a road trip also. >and most importantly HEALING. I always hated that mages are glass cannons and die once out of mana hate that too but i'm more into >use the power of nature to regenerate >use enemies blood and flesh as nourishment to keep going but that's just me, i guess that would be closer to a necromancer/Druid hybrid class? I am not a big fan of using god's magic, you fuck up with your deity and you become "fallen" and lose most of your powers. >It's always about balance in games. No one can be "too strong". I used to play MMOs they try to create variety of classes which end up with vastly different rotations and gear requirements but still the same max total dps, your 36 step mage rotation become equal to a 4 step warrior rotation, you end up with no one playing the hard to play class in dungeons and raids outside of a few hardcore. >Yeah it's quite the work but it's worth it. t. cowboy next you're gonna tell me you're into computers and programming too lol no seriously that's something i am thinking of doing once i have enough money saved. >I don't want them to call the cops on me lol. Just make them think they're the crazy ones for calling the cops on you :p > I just don't reveal my powerlevel because I know it scares the shit out of mundanes. i just tell them i'm religious/spiritual they're familiar with that, nothing spooky about someone having a relationship with god >found between the minds because then I have to figure out what causes the wedge between parts of my brain i am considering just forcing a merge at this point, "the guardian of the core" might just have to beat them, idk i'll wait till i can think more clearly, my mind is weird rn. >You have to unite not just with "others" but with your own inner processes too got it, that's gonna take a while.. >This is why it's important to not forget why you are doing what you are doing and not get drunk on power right, being true basically, a certain mindset, still figuring that out. > If you feel not ready then take a breather and recollect yourself see that doesn't really work with me, i'm either fully focused and burning myself or procrastinating, i'd rather choose fire, the flames heals anyway and i can always rebuild. starting having very bad vertigo and nausea, endend up making idk some kind of green/yellow sap as a nervous system? it works, no idea wtf i am doing but it works! I think i am just building energy channels after fucking mine up with constant energy work. >Also don't forget everything is an illusion and all is mind. Not even the spirits know everything. no worry i can't forget that one. trying to think as the world as an extension of me and me as an extension of the world these days, at last i'm getting somewhere. >They are trying their best to not scare me so I do not release energies unnecessarily for me it's more like >come on you can do this get up and fight, spare with me >this fear isn't you you're better than this tear them apart and eat I really need some balance between demoralized retard and the rip and tear liver eater i am becoming.

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why do i even crave innards. > I looked like a living psychic anomaly with pulsating darkness and all consuming hatred. that's pretty cool! >Yeah angels will show you quite the weird things so only do it when you feel like your "quest log" is empty and your balls are made of steel got it, when i finish my main body i'll call him >people think devils are bad I like some demons. >I am not sensing that from you. I prb killed whatever brainwashing thing was one me years ago wrong desert religion btw >Ultimately everyone will have to find truth on it's own but that doesn't mean we cannot help and hint some things. I agree with that, but keep that plausible deniability y'know >merged all humans into 1 gigaflesh with many faces that experience the "community" and the serenity of heaven constantly yeah.. that's horrible. >Yeah in my own bejeweled city there was a well and that well contained a crystal and after I evaporated the black smog the energies shoot up and the skies cleared. i see, the more i think about all this, the more i'm realizing that i need to figure out this system of recycling of energy asap. >Sorry if I worded it wrong that princes was my "own" and she helped me to discover my own realm many years ago got it and no worry > You are realizing your own flame already. Helping you might hinder you. right, due to lack of sleep and eh hate against a mosquito i ended up with two flames, the black flame of destruction left hand and the flame of regeneration of my right the black flame turn my hand into a skelly. I think i need to unite them, death and rebirth I suppose. trying to get the commitment to fully engulf myself into the black one, still thinking about it. I'll rebirth with the stone but i think i need to finish what i am doing first. >If it looks mean punch it or burn it. They cannot "prosecute" you for that. I agree, it doesn't really matters, i do have some experience of their attacks. you're pretty composed btw, rn i don't think many spirits would want to deal with me Outside mommy Gaia and my other guides, i have very little patience to someone who might be hostile now. >Yeah they can take that form to open and make a chakra "spin" for real. Rotational forces generates and moves energy through the entire body. yeah.. this actually happened the other day, spinning then rotating in the other direction and vomiting dirt, again and again, till a metal cover on them fell and some lava appeared inside me where visible from the chakra, spilling a little, other things happened like some giant rib cage covering me before going back inside my rib cage. >Wonder what race you belong tbh I am not fully sure yet, i'd say it shows in my nature but as i haven't fully realized it yet i'll wait till it i know without a doubt. one of my guide is actually a drow, many of my guides are pixies.

>>784 >The energy channels had to reconnect and the energies forced them open. Makes sense,got some help from "the king of cockroaches" the other day showed me a binary energy system in the body. >Yeah I only learned to do that later. When I knew how to do that it was almost unnecessary because my flame and energies took care of most things already. It's pretty useful rn, as i can get the understanding without the poison so the magic doesn't mess me up as much. >Yeah you are doing things so similarly in nature to me that I wonder if it's a mere energetic resonance/synchronicity or there will be a plottwist where we realize we are some long lost comrades of a forgotten age. i wonder, we could just be kindred. >Maybe? Every magical girl is different but the underlying mechanics are not "far off" Talking to fairies/pixies and learning magic from them, having a soulstone... lol >Yeah i thought several times I'm gonna get a heart attack at the start same never had my heart beat that fast. >Yeah that place was not exactly "mine" I just had an entry there. the bottom of my volcano has an entry to some kind of hell realm, i guess that would be the underside. >Entities rarely dare to annoy me. oh some of these attacks was just training for me organized by my guides, rarely i'll have someone try to kill me, i end up eating whatever i can. most of the time they barely have muscle, just a core that keeps everything together and a skeletal structure, idk why they do that. >Yes. An entity had to explain this to me while I asked about an appearance of my past life. You have quite the good hunches. That explanation seem to have been addressed to both of us. > and when your core values start to change with your appearance. mindshifting.. that's what shapeshifting does you actually become someone else.. exciting isn't it? even changing your eye color is enough for that. >Like physically? yup, then again it might just be some kind of nature cycle, i get ginger hair some months. might also be related to my current mindset, having red hair means "going to war" for me well i should say it means more "bloodbath". >I consider it less difficult tbh. You just discover fix unclog and reactivate/reconnect the flow of your meridians. Once your inner sight opens and you understand your internal elements it becomes natural. sorry i meant destroying the body and rebuilding it or shifting into a similar one in appearance but healthy at once, i'm already fixing my body. > I remember the first time I possessed a demon. Yes... We too can possess them too. It's not a one way street. That's so cool did you have to pay the demon or something or they were just cool with it? I remember i used to try to imagine how it would feel to be some random person i seen or a bird, but possessing without permission seems rude now that i know better.. then again i was saw some rich evil guy i hated on the internet and was ready to send my double to him and tear his stomach apart and eat his liver and innards. I respect free will but some people are evil enough to be dealt with then again i'm weird rn i'll wait before doing something so drastic unprovoked.. now if spirit-less humans are a thing that could means "free" bodies but idk if it's that simple. I was meditating in public starting to see some "me" particles going inside people, maybe it's just pinging or it's a way for me to realize the illusion of separation no idea. >You just shift into them True if you wanna be a bird just imagine being a bird! i guess i just want an actual system of bodies, that way i can change between different humans appearances and a hawk if i want without this amount of effort to even get the right mindset of the shifting goal. that's why i am doing human i'm not risking being stuck with the mind of a hawk, now being a different human my spirit can still make the flesh work. > A divine wisdom a day keeps the psych ward away. H-haha lol.thanks for your help. >The more I think about the shit I did the less sure I am I can explain it anymore. yeah i get that. >might have been more symbolical for you it literally represented my goal i believe or at least one of my goals. >Also focus on your own awakening and pacing. Hope I didn't confuse you with my writings too much. No worry i like reading about it even if i don't necessarily have something to say to everything right now. >listening to some touhou doujinshi music

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>something about centipedes and immortality?? >fall in rabbit hole on sekiro lore idk never played the game >continue to make the sap thing energy channel run through my body >tummy infestend with centipede ??? chest too???? >now feasting on centipedes, their flesh is pure poison but it doesn't harm me just cleans my teeth Also i have been trying to make horn grows for a while but it never worked, they were always "fake" and i could remove them eaisly. They had black snakes attached to them when i removed them they looked cartoonish with big eyes, i just realized, the snake is just energy they were "fake" because my current body wasn't compatible with horns in that state. but now with that sap channel it's solid enough for them to be attached to this "nervous system". might try to make some good ones later..

>>826 >current age humans would lose their sanity if they seen a spirit manifest to the naked eye The subconscious makes them autoignore it. Losing sanity makes the energies of the humans explode so spirits know how to move around without scaring humans. Imagine walking around bulls or elephants and they start a stampede once noticing you. This is why spirits operate around the blindspots. Even I notice spirits fleeing my gaze became my "mindset" is not welcoming. I have to calm down and announce that I am allowing spirits to manifest in my presence or my animal mind just auto banishes them. I am practicing via taming scared animals to get in touch with this part of my mind. You just tune into their mind and calm down with them. >And then they try to destroy the moon for some reason! The push and pull of the moon is jamming and increasing the strength of some spirits the same way the sun does. I am not sure which influence you dislike by instinct here. There are just too many there lol >happened a few times not sure why I remember when a half wolf young girl appeared while meditating and told me >Father you were the devourer of the moon what happened to you to become like this Yeah it was quite the wtf moment. I am still not sure of the answers but there were times when moon shaped mental blocks started to hit my third eye but I didn't connect to my entire spirit family yet. It seems it's quite large and I am not fully "myself" yet. >Like the pocket hell dimension they get sucked in after death? It's complicated but it is a sort of "we make our own hell" thing and after their soul and flesh body complex collapses their own "aura" swallows them and they fall to the level where their "sins" anchor them. >didn't realize they spent that much time there Sometimes they sleep for an eternity with or without "dreams" while sometimes they fight themselves till they reach an inner "consensus" and that fuels a rebirth process. It's real complicated because most people get pulled away by afterlife realms or guided via their own entities. This usually happens to spectacularly ignorant people. But I am still not sure how it works. What I can see currently that there are "spirit currents" like rivers (The Great Tree is like this) while some people just fall out of a current and wait for a "flood" to carry them around. They are like fish out of the water. It can get complicated but there are many natural mechanism that try to make sure no spirit is left alone "forever". In the end we all return into THE ALL. >not quite sure what you meant Yeah I wanted to absorb that energy to make myself stronger then I realized that it feels sour and it actually makes me weaker? I asked why and my guides told me that I have to recycle this energy first so I can absorb it. Then I asked so it's like recycling any other energy that is around me? They said yes so I concluded this energy does not really have a "value" to me and on a whim I made it to explode. That opened up the "veil" further and I understood how energies move and get trapped through the layers of reality. >it was always a homesickness Yeah I just managed to connect to my feelings I had while being dead before this life of mine. I literally had that homesickness that absolute "lost soul" feeling. All my mortal emotions dwarf compared to those feelings. Good thing I am alive so I care about my own feelings more otherwise that feeling would eat me. >call to go home Yeah I found the connection point to my origin and I can waste several more eternities in these realities before going "Home". This is a sort of "classtrip" for me and going home would mean I have to sleep in the car until the "time is right" so all I need to do is to reconnect to my own energies then I can enjoy my own potential and figure out a conclusion in this existence that I will carry further or not... My home reality is weird. Time flows in all direction thoughts work completely differently and I realized I don't need to stress on it too much. Realized how I can visit my "brothers" in their own dimensions and they are also occupied with their own autism. Let's say not all of them think "incarnating" and forgetting everything is "fun" while some of them like the idea of "dreaming" down here. Didn't find all of them yet. We are somewhat hyperindividualistic because we can just share all our skills via telepathy so doing different things is better for the "whole group" in the end. >Druid hybrid class You are close to druid I think. Necromancers are supposed to use the restless and "unwanted" energies of the dead to fuel their unholy ambition. But ofc never get too shackled by videogame ideas. Mediums are necromancers IRL already. I too could call some of my ways necromantic but I dislike to keep spirits in a cycle of suffering so I try to help them either find their flame or a spirit current... but some of them just decide that they like me too much and enter a complete submission pact for some reason. They can help me rebuild my "spirit world" connection system. Usually I rarely bother them with my own things because I like to use my own powers for most things. I only let the "minions" handle it if they are hyperspecialized in that field already. Most of them are nature spirits anyways so their task is to mend the natural flow and the weather around me. And some restless spirits. >I am not a big fan of using god's magic, you fuck up with your deity You must never ever work with a "deity" that makes contracts that you can just "fall" without noticing. You only do that if you absolutely know what you are doing and every god has it's own influence range so you have to know what is and isn't allowed while using the magic. Divine authorities/reaches/borders are important and starting a "war" with an another god because you are an arrogant retard is the stupidest thing. I too have a body that is under "Oath" but that oath is more of a mechanical limitation. I am unable to use my own powers if it's not in accordance with my own full being. With this I cannot "accidentally" cast a spell that comes from my more destructive abilities. That doesn't mean I have no powers outside of my higher powers. It just means I am using my "training wheels" psychic powers and understand my own intrusive thoughts and what is my "true will" and what is some mundane retardation that I got infected with. "Free will" is closer to influenced will. Merging with God makes some people think they will lose their "free will". Not exactly true. You just lose the shitty influences and a new influence takes over. The goal is finding your own "true will" where there are no second guesses or distractions anymore because you know what you are doing and it is in accordance with your own fully realized self. That is what it means finding God. Finding the real God and not these mere imitations everyone spurts left and right. Realizing what is and isn't THE ALL and how omniscience and omnipotence works is not easy. >become "fallen" and lose most of your powers Like that dude on the cross? Yeah there is a time where your "God" leaves you and you have to find him on your own. Being arrogant full with power is one thing but what will happen when you lose everything. It's not about "worshiping him" till the end but understanding your "true connection" instead of the faulty mental frameworks that via most priests and magicians operate in the beginning. What is "true faith" and what is a bunch of cheap words preaching about something not even they understand. True words move the entire world while pointless preaching makes you fall asleep... Yeah I am aware how words words words of my posts are and I am still finding my own true expression. We are too dependent on words currently.

>next you're gonna tell me you're into computers and programming too lol Yeah but most I can do is basic HTML editing because I needed that skill when our family milk shop had a website and my school taught C# and Java skills are so meager I am not willing to say I know programming at all... As much as I was into learning properly programming in the computer age in high school slowly after I realized I will be unable to capitalize on it because I have too much work already to properly engross myself in the craft. I realized I have to let go of this ambition of mine. Seeing how monopolies buy up everything then I realized a decade ago that AI and pajeet codemonkeys will overrun the industry no matter what and I will never be able to capitalize on a skill that becomes obsolete via new programming methods every decade I kinda gave up on becoming a "real programmer". I am a dabbler max but I don't even have enough free time to use a proper linux distro. I was interested in computers my whole life but I am quite lethargic towards it in the past years. >no seriously that's something i am thinking of doing once i have enough money saved Do whatever your heart tells you to do. >nothing spooky about someone having a relationship with god Depends tbh. Usually I wait for the other party to reveal their powerlevel first. >i am considering just forcing a merge at this point You are merging but merging is not always permanent but a temporal glimpse then you have to get accustomed to it and sometimes it turns out you have to merge further until a new equilibrium arises. >idk i'll wait till i can think more clearly, my mind is weird rn. Wise choice. >see that doesn't really work with me, i'm either fully focused and burning myself or procrastinating, i'd rather choose fire, the flames heals anyway and i can always rebuild. Yes congrats you are literally me but "merger" means you will have to understand your gungho part and your procrastinator too and they cannot "fight" because while you think the "fire" will win no matter what the "lazy" part of yours is like a quicksand so action is not always "triumphant" so you will have to understand what makes you "lazy" what energies generate it or how lack of energies make it arise and how the fire burns. I am saying this because I still figuring this out and realizing that I am keeping some of my energy channels inactive and then trying to "defeat" that part of me via making several of my energy channels overactive and that results in nothing. I am understanding new pathways every day. Your mindset is good. Keep the fire but understand there are other elements too. Fire breathes oxygen and the smoke makes it suffocate. Understand what is a clean burn and what is making you "burnout". This was a minor caution btw. Follow your flame as much as you can. >the flames heals anyway and i can always rebuild True more or less. >starting having very bad vertigo and nausea Yeah that happens while energetic imbalances and changes try to work themselves out. >endend up making idk some kind of green/yellow sap as a nervous system? Yeah I had that too. It increases the conductivity of your nerves and applies a protective coating so you don't burn out yourself. I too have no idea what that is exactly. Had things like that too. There are just too many of them. >I think i am just building energy channels after fucking mine up with constant energy work. Yeah awakening is about understanding our traumas and understanding the retardation we did with our psychic "dabbling". I too had many wtf is this shit then >oh rith I did this spell a decade ago and forgot it wow never realized it's still here and doing this much damage h-haha >trying to think as the world as an extension of me and me as an extension of the world these days Yes it's something like that. >for me it's more like Yeah they are usually urging me to calm down. I had to realize I like to be angry too much. >why do i even crave innards Might be something with your own entrails. The stomach is the great energetic reactor and storage of the human body. The intestines is a large snake like the kundalini snake/spine too. I too had to awaken it. But dunno tbh. The way the internal organs awaken can be weird. >that's pretty cool! Yeah like sitting on a faulty nuclear reactor. It just shows how negligent I am with my own spiritual work and emotional well being. Psychic abilities resonate with emotions too well. You cannot be a trigger happy child with nuclear ordnance or entities will have to step in and seal your powers for your own safety. But yes it is very cool if I look at it like a mundane who grew up on superhero comics. Otherwise it's a wtf is wrong with me. I had to connect these parts of myself as well >wrong desert religion btw There are too many. Just too many desert cults. There is a reason why things are so crazy down there. That region was the birthplace of civilization and now it's everything but that. Too many gods spirits and other things running amok there. Quite TLDR and not even important. >the more i'm realizing that i need to figure out this system of recycling of energy asap Yeah. Ask your guides about it as much as you can. Not every energy needs to be recycled. There is a reason why "attachments" are bad and block enlightenment. Most mental blocks are not needed within you and once you let go of it new energies can take it's place. Once you figure it out intuitively it's easy until that it's confusing as hell. >hate against a mosquito Yeah the "respecting all life" was quite annoying with the mosquito but once I understood that they finally went away "somehow". But fuck those bitches. >the black flame of destruction left hand and the flame of regeneration of my right That is how the emperor tarot works. Find your throne if you are there already. >I think i need to unite them, death and rebirth I suppose. The "trick" is that it's already "united" you are just not seeing how they connect yet. But feel how it works. You are on the right path. >trying to get the commitment to fully engulf myself into the black one Maybe it will clean you all of the energies that do not belong to you then you reignite yourself with your "life" flame. Experiment. Heard many occultist doing it this way. For me it was less necessary because of other weird energetic formations.

>>826 >like some giant rib cage covering me before going back inside my rib cage Yeah the sternum and the ribs are the "heart chakra" and not exactly the heart. Watch over with it so you don't send hostile energies through your heart. I too had to learn to activate the ribs many times. >one of my guide is actually a drow Fringe has some drowsexual wizards around they might show up if you ask drow related questions. >many of my guides are pixies Seems like I can connect to the pixies with a moderate effort while with the drow we both need to quell or naturally murderous aura first. She has a ritual dagger and engulfed in a weird living darkness while the pixies appear as colored lights for me now. But I only made a glance. >>827 >Makes sense,got some help from "the king of cockroaches" the other day showed me a binary energy system in the body ohkay. Maybe he was the originator of your Emperor tarot form? >we could just be kindred Maybe >some of these attacks was just training for me organized by my guides For me they just "let it happen" because they know I can handle it. Or I personally decided to get involved in a mess. >i end up eating whatever i can Yeah for me my energetic flame does that so I don't need to consume via my mouth anymore but when I "eat" energies that means I decided to walk a warpath to eradicate everyone in that direction because lower energies fuel my hate so I usually just let go of those that are not serious about attacking me. My spirits devour lesser beings anyway... if it's allowed ofc. If my bound spirits get energetically stronger that energy surplus gets transferred to me because they too cannot handle too much excess energies. Srsly complicated. My spirit economy is weird. Everybody has it's own task and that task is usually "being yourself" and harmonizing. >most of the time they barely have muscle, just a core that keeps everything together and a skeletal structure, idk why they do that Muscles are only necessary on the physical. On the astral a skeleton (foundation) and skin (appearance) is enough because the energies do most of the work. Minor entities rarely have complicated evercolored everchanging bodilyforms. Higher entities on the otherhand... They have as much as they are willing to show so you don't get overwhelmed. >it might just be some kind of nature cycle, i get ginger hair some months Oh yeah that happens with that kind of genetics. Even my mother changed the color of her eyes with her emotions. Her emotions were mostly shit so the eyes were not really nice :( I didn't inherit that nor I did the thing like Tesla where his eye color turned to blue while awakening in his childhood. Wonder if it will happen but it's not really my focus >having red hair means "going to war" for me well i should say it means more "bloodbath" Whatever makes you achieve results lol. >mindshifting.. that's what shapeshifting does you actually become someone else.. exciting isn't it? Hard to explain. The mindshift is necessary otherwise you are unable to operate the body but it's important to not "get lost" in the body via fully believing that you are an other person. This is why transcending the ego is necessary. True kundalini awakening let's you change forms at will because you are "above and beyond" it "but truly one with it" at once. I still have nuances in my mind I have to untangle because I know I get lost in some energy streams sometimes and I need to be pulled back. >sorry i meant destroying the body and rebuilding it or shifting into a similar one in appearance but healthy at once, i'm already fixing my body. For me that is the "same thing". But whatever works for you. >That's so cool did you have to pay the demon or something I dislike paying for things because it just results in a "spiritual materialism/greed" so I usually work with higher principles and proper consent and not "contractual obligations" way. Hard to explain. I have my own autism in this matter. Spirits like it because it reminds them of the ancient ways and not the "modern occultist nonsense". I usually find out what energies the spirit needs then we "work together". >they were just cool with it? The demon kinda did not have "proper consciousness" and just possessed me out of nowhere and as I tried to get free during sleep I went and possessed it fully then I became an owner of that body then other weird lessons started. That demon didn't really had the "will to live" by default and might have connected to my "desire to die" or something. The whole experience was weird all I noticed that I started to walk on the walls while being out of my body then suddenly I awoke in a hell dimension fully in that body and my guide just appeared and started explaining things. Truth is not every "demon" is a proper individual. Some of them are even more lost than us. >but possessing without permission seems rude now that i know better.. It's not just rude but illadvised. As I wrote down they can also possess you back or impart parts of their mind on your own thus you lose yourself and become them or you kill them with energetic overload or an energetic recoil will damage you hard. It is always important to realize how we connect to each other and what are the guiding forces of ourselves and the minds of others. Truth is we constantly experience a sort of "co-possession" while talking and exchanging energies. Not to mention animals are too simple minded so to possess them you have to downgrade yourself to their level... Then you will notice some parts of your soul literally became the animal itself. That part is really weird. >send my double to him and tear his stomach apart and eat his liver and innards You are truly on a drow mindset. >I respect free will but some people are evil enough to be dealt with then again i'm weird rn i'll wait before doing something so drastic unprovoked.. Yeah watch out with that. Long range psychic warfare can get messy >now if spirit-less humans are a thing that could means "free" bodies but idk if it's that simple. Yeah they are a thing but... You get karma a "spiritual STD" if you put your energies into things that you are not able to handle. There is a difference "going there" and "ravaging them". Trust me you don't want to become (dumb as) some people. Not to mention some people have entities and guardians that will give you quite the harsh lesson for doing that. >see some "me" particles going inside people Yeah I too have those and they roam around as my intents go into all direction. >wow that person posted something I don't understand I should think about it a little >lil me just went into his mind and now I know a whole lot of things about that person I am trying to keep them in check because this is the curse of the "wandering mind" that Buddhists warn about a lot. I even had an anima force that appeared like Shion from Higurashi in a dream yelling at those guys because they just went into all directions and they are forgetting their duties. They are like the childhood me but bereft of physical limitations... That doesn't mean they don't get lost and they need to be recalled. Or they turn into other beings and now I am wondering wtf is this. Is this me? or some entity just wandered here. Ofc my mind just shifts into them if they are in trouble so I can solve the issues and this is why principles are needed so they don't zoom into all sorts of trouble.

>>827 >i guess i just want an actual system of bodies Yeah that's a nice idea but hard to explain how it works. I have one but it's not exactly a system but like a wardrobe that I need for my journey or something. >that's why i am doing human i'm not risking being stuck with the mind of a hawk Yes imagine suddenly eating small animals out of instinct in public. Supposedly I had a past life in ancient greece where I was part of the spirit world and I possessed doves to go around in the physical because they are chill and it's easy to observe humans with them without them making too much fuss. Predatory birds are harder to control because their instincts are too keen hunting prey so calming them is harder >i like reading about it That's good to hear because I know most people are unable to comprehend this whole process and they have hard time relating >i don't necessarily have something to say to everything right now No need to comment on everything. Feel your own pace. You are learning your own processes. It's not easy. Only post if you feel like it. >listening to some touhou doujinshi music You might need to visit sunflower on endchan if you keep this up my fellow touhou magician >something about centipedes and immortality?? Yes... that is a thing. In daoism or confucianism? I jumped to birds and snakes fast and they ate most of the bugs but yes that has some spiritual symbolism but I need to ask around wtf they mean besides cleaning out energetic pathways and they are like "snakes with legs" so I am not sure what else they do >fall in rabbit hole They usually connect to dimensions or parts of your mind >tummy infestend with centipede ??? chest too???? I have no idea what they do besides cleaning and stimulating >now feasting on centipedes, their flesh is pure poison but it doesn't harm me just cleans my teeth Sounds like a win then? >Also i have been trying to make horn grows for a while but it never worked Energy channels open like that. I had many horns growing above my head. But they changed forms later because I required other spiritual "antennas" for my workings. There are several antennas the brain can have and they can appear as horns at the start. Do not focus on the appearance focus on the function. Horns can solidify a mindset where you become a sort of combative entity for or against a cause but it can develop further into different forms crowns flowers or laurels or halos. They will represent your higher mind manifesting >snake is just energy Yes energy can turn into semi sentient animals and it's important to notice if they have sentience of not. If they have sentience you have to treat them that way if not you can just reabsorb them and let them become the original energy. >now with that sap channel it's solid enough for them to be attached to this "nervous system". Yes they are antennas in function. Try to connect to your higher self or increase the reach of your intuition I don't know. Why do you want to be horny anyway. I might have been a satyr for several hundred years and I am not seeing the appeal. Some entities even know who I am. Almost annoying Why is it so hard keeping my posts short and concise? 24k+ characters. Damm.

Hello, I'm just looking for recommendations for books on Astrology and Alchemy, I'm also interested in learning how to read natal charts, also interested in learning about metals and their correspondent planetary energies, or energies in general for that matter.

Is it bad if I use what I learned from IIH to influence camgirls?

>>871 it's bad if that's the best thing you can think of to do with it

>>823 Intuition tells me that they use the same kinds of nanomachines now that they have in the supposed vaccines; I suppose that water could condense in the skies around them to form rain droplets. >>871 Sex feels alot better when it's fueled more by each others hearts than by each others sexualities. But of course, if you wanna get that good feeling, you've gotta find someone that you like for alot more than just her body.

>>871 Depends what you mean by "influence" tbh. There are quite the large range of things these mentally fragile creatures can and will do while being surrounded by an army of simps and grifters >>881 >they have in the supposed vaccines They don't even bother with them nowadays. Now they even admit that the vax has adverse effects and other things. AstraZeneca is recalled and they don't even bother inventing a new coof because people are still too mad. >I suppose that water could condense in the skies around them to form rain droplets HAARP is supposedly messing with the electromagnetic forces of earth to make weather patterns while cloud seeders put chemicals into the atmosphere to create clouds. I am not sure adding nanomachines to the equation will lead anywhere but why not tbh. We still don't know who or how controls them and if they are effective at all. I still think this whole covid was a test run and they realized they still don't have enough power to pull it off smoothly but what do I know.

>>874 I knew it. >>887 >Depends what you mean by "influence" tbh Use fluid impregnation, volting or whatever Bardon called it to send mental suggestions their way so that they will "decide" out of nowhere to do the poses I want to fap to.

>>893 Bruh I am sure you could summon them into your dreams or get a gf with this level of power already. I am 90% sure some parts of your soul got imprinted already and you could feel their "mixed" essence deep within if you wanted. As much as I want to say stop doing this asap... You will have to go and find out why you have these desires and how are your energies currently entangled with these whor...I mean "girls". Mixing magic with an addiction will have strange consequences sometimes. >I knew it. Yeah Have The Devil Tarot. What you are doing currently is shifting between the "male" who is chained by those loose shackles to that rock like the female and as you work your magic you become the "devil" too. The problem comes after you forget which you are and an energetic backlash may or may not happen. Depends on many factors and how long you are doing it. You influence the camgirl. Who influences you to influence the camgirl? You will have to meet and understand that force. It takes time I know. Don't exactly consider it as the final boogieman but don't brush it away either. It's always imperative understanding this force on the path or weird things will happen

>>894 >summon them into your dreams or get a gf I do summon stuff into my dreams of course. But a gf is way too much hassle to have in one's life. It's not like I know their names, or spend hours at it or anything. It's just that whenever I do check one out, I can't help but do it. Funny thing is, having animals from live cams act on suggestions is way harder. Likely because we are already connected by a web of parasites riding us daily. Modern humans are truly cursed. I feel like I'm on a holding pattern waiting to be called for duty or something. I have 0 interest in pursuing my own ambitions. The siddhis, if I may call them that, are there just for amusement and lulz. >could feel their "mixed" essence deep within Yeah. Most of the time I can't even get myself to fap to them. >how are your energies currently entangled I'm like fly tape. Everything gets stuck to me without barely any engagement anyway. >Who influences you That's funny. I had not thought about that. Yeah, there's a bunch of stuff here, like I said.

What's up with crystals? I'm fairly clairvoyant and clairse tient, but crystals do nothing for me. Are they just one big meme, or is there a secret to unlocking their energy?

>>914 >What's up with crystals? They probably only work as symbolic artifacts for ritual magic, which means they communicate something, but have no qualities aside from that.

>>914 >I'm fairly clairvoyant and clairse tient There are many different ways those skills work >Are they just one big meme Existence is a big meme itself. >or is there a secret to unlocking their energy? Depends on the crystal. Try Selenite. That was the first crystal that grabbed my attention while visiting a crystal shop the first time because I sensed how much energy it has. Every crystal has it's function and the spirits that resonate with it but they need to be "activated" which means they have to absorb proper energies first a spirit needs to inhabit it or you have to give it enough "positive" energies. Nowadays I am not working with crystals anymore because it was a thing that I only needed when I was still a neophyte. I still have them around but don't use them for anything. Reiki likes it to activate chakras and connect dimensions but it's not my thing anymore. I am trying to remove every materialistic inclination of my spirituality as much as I can. Sometimes a physical object is necessary but usually to understand some connection or attachment and after the understanding comes through it can be abandoned. Only do crystals if you really care about them. That whole field is infested with soccer mom tier "crystal moms" and if you have real abilities already you can skip them. I consider them better than binaurals but that doesn't mean they are surefire if you don't know how to use them. And spiritual crystalphiles can get real autistic with their orgone crystal feng shui OCD. I am not sure if fringe has those people. They are a special kind of breed. If you can build your crystal clusters properly and have spirits inhabiting them it's a powerhouse but otherwise it's just a quirky obsession.

>>918 I wasn’t able to pick up anything from the piece of selenite I bought off Amazon (I know). Except for the fact that when I look at it, I feel it’s in rough shape. It’s not very well cut, has flaws everywhere, etc. Since I wasn’t able to pick up anything I decided to sleep with it next to me. A night of nightmares ensued. I think there’s some bad juju inside this thing. I shoved it back in the closet, but I’m thinking of just throwing it away.

Can you do that sort of spiritual crystal stuff with just random rocks from outside? I think it would be cool to learn how to 'talk' to them or whatever consciousness they might house.

>>941 >I bought off Amazon (I know) Yeah the one I bought was from a small family owned crystal shop that I found while randomly walking in the city where I went to university and the selenite was worked into an oval or ovoid shape. That crystal definitely had a perfect environment to charge up while being around many crystals and a shop owner who liked crystals. While a selenite coming from the mines then into an amazon warehouse might have the worst of things in it. >I feel it’s in rough shape Yeah there are guides on the web how you have to cleanse and recharge them but I am not really an expert on them anymore. I went into the "real power comes from within" direction and didn't find the inspiration to work with crystals nowadays. >It’s not very well cut, has flaws everywhere, etc. Yeah that's usually a bad indicator. This is why crystal shops are better but as with everything it depends on their owner. Some of them are just scam artists while some are earnest weirdos. >I think there’s some bad juju inside this thing There are guides about crystals on the web how to charge and cleanse them. Can't really link pages because I did not really use them for like a decade so I am not even sure what sites I used at all. Some of them were forums while some the typical new ager weirdness with the name of the corresponding angels for every crystal and stuff. Crystal people come in many flavors. >>942 >Can you do that sort of spiritual crystal stuff with just random rocks from outside? Yeah. You can talk to trees to your computer to your body parts or organs too. Everything is alive but it depends on your compatibility and how you can link your consciousness to them. Those legends about people being able to talk to animals are an actual siddhis. It is attainable but not very useful if you don't work with animals in a gentle way. >I think it would be cool to learn how to 'talk' to them or whatever consciousness they might house. Most of their "thoughts" are boring as hell. Sometimes you can find peculiar insights but overall they live a very slow and monotone life so if it's not your "destiny" or a "call for adventure" then they will be usually boring (or rude as hell if it's around a hectic place) until you find a way to interact with their "higher consciousness" but that is like entering a completely different world or existence... which is also not very useful because communicating the things that happened there to any sane person is almost impossible... I can shift into "mystic" mode and see the inhabitants of the other worlds and do things with them but some mundane apathy within me is just making me "feel bad" about it and something reminds me I have better things to do than this. Mastering my own desires takes time. I had to realize they are my greatest obstacle currently. These faulty mundane wirings that try to make us into a clog into this machine called society and currently it's not just bleeding to death but throwing all it's gears left and right and pretends to be "efficient" and "modern" k enough about sorrow posting If you want to talk to rocks or plants or anything similar try to find a place where there are very few or 0 mundanes around if it's possible in nature then sit down then empty your mind as much as you can stare at the rock with a gentle intention of communication/understanding and open your mind to it's "influence" try to feel it's shape it's form it's energies with your own energies then as you keep your mind empty try to "hear" what it's saying. Don't force it too much and don't have expectations. It just happens when your mind reaches the layer the rock is "communicating" on. It's like trying to hear a soft murmur in the wind or the rustling of the leaves and once you pay attention you can make out some words or at least the direction the "sound" comes from. If a spirit is there you might learn interesting things. I think this covers it more or less. Overall it's about meditating with your environmental energies and establishing a rapport with them.

>>865 No one?

>>964 /fringe/ was never very big on astrology.

>>865 >>965 I used to seek that information but then I gave up.

>>964 Get Brennan’s Hellenistic Astrology and use its bibliography to go deeper when you finish it. >>965 Astrology is just a very large energetic influence, but it does not equate to predestination. Unless you’re going to make a living reading astrological charts for mundanes, any decent mystic should be able to stay untouched by the influence of the archons. At most, you could use it to do planetary magick, but there is so much possibility once you go beyond that. Who cares about the planets?

I have never seriously considered the nature of the popular Judeo-Christian God in all the time I’ve pondered outside entities in general. I am familiar with the idea of the demiurge and such, but I wonder if there is something more or maybe even something completely different. Just what is God and does this entity even have any creative powers? Is it perhaps an entity that just happened upon humanity in its early days and our collective thoughts maintain its presence in different forms over time? Of course I’ve never seen or sensed God. I actually have sensed very little, I’ve only ever managed to feel suggestions of entities. At least I think so. Like there was an extremely, extremely thin barrier (sounds strange to fixate on this but I can’t possibly emphasize in words how impossibly thin I felt this barrier was) of some kind between me and them. And that there are many of them. So I’m not very good at this. Despite that, what intuition I have tells me God is not exactly a happy benevolent entity but not necessarily evil. Sounds vague I know, but I’m convinced he is different than what the major religions make of him. No points for realizing that of course, but I really am curious. Also, to those that know how, is there a way to see past the barrier I described? And of course let me know whether that’s a good idea.

>>975 >is there a way to see past the barrier I described? Maybe the barrier is just something you conceptually sense. I've never experienced that. I either see and know of the beings who are there, or I can't sense them at all. People tend to hate this answer, but what I did was just to copy what I saw some medium do on a tv show where they solve issues with ghosts and poltergeists. Then I just practiced for 2 years until I had a breakthrough and suddenly saw a woman before me when in the locker room at work. I was able to communicate with her by thinking of images, and I'd get images back, and gradually this is how I learned telepathy. She would never tell me exactly who she was, only that she was from Germany, there was some taboo about talking about details.

>>968 That one's not in my library, thanks for the suggestion.

>>975 Every major religion that has a central god has an exoteric and an esoterix interpretation. Possibly due to the exoteric one being a corruption by controlling forces glossing over the esoteric one. They describe the spirit spark within every man, the foundation of reality itself. And they also turned that figure into an external god. An egregore.

Is sex evil and of the demiurge?

>>1031 Sex is an act of creation (engendering). All creative acts can be viewed as male + female = result.

>>1031 Not evil, but it serves a lot of the Demiurge's needs.

What are some good exercises for past life recovery? I've got a feeling that I should do it, but I'm not sure how to avoid creative writing and wishful thinking.

>>831 >Imagine walking around bulls or elephants and they start a stampede once noticing you. Right, sometimes i forget humans are strong too, >I have to calm down and announce that I am allowing spirits to manifest in my presence or my animal mind just auto banishes them. Might need to try that, i am way too aggressive rn. i am becoming some kind of core devourer or something, idk parasites i guess, seems some of them have memories, 6-7 cores and a golden one, the golden contain "memories" but my understanding is incomplete so i could just be siphoning the only good part from them this way. >I am not sure which influence you dislike by instinct here. There are just too many there lol No idea, i just know it pisses me off so bad i wanna punch it.I used to dislike the sun as well but now i'm more neutral towards it. >Father you were the devourer of the moon what happened to you to become like this you're some type of Dragon? >it is a sort of "we make our own hell" thing like when they don't know they're even dead? >their own "aura" swallows them and they fall to the level where their "sins" anchor them. scary, i noticed this on a friend a black heavy matter around him, i wonder if i could cleanse him, i am not that nice to do it in a way it could affect me negatively, maybe someway to pay your karma in a way that don't let it accumulate for 80 years lol. >my guides told me that I have to recycle this energy first so I can absorb it I was burning some bad energy and it turned into ash, i tried to eat the ash autism one of my guide told me to not do that , seem ash can be burned further and the rest be scattered to earth or whatever. prb my flame not being perfect so needs a second burn. I'm figuring out some inner light rn, i have access to much more energy than before, wait do i even have to absorb the space energy? i just generate it? i think the issue is my ego and how i see energy, might not need to soak up at all it's just there? I try to make a ball of light and i have 300 appear, my spells take the shape of fairies now, wonder why "fiery fairy" eh? >Good thing I am alive so I care about my own feelings more otherwise that feeling would eat me. damn. is it because you don't remember something important? >Yeah I found the connection point to my origin and I can waste several more eternities in these realities before going "Home". Oh so they're all different you connected? like a hub of realities ? >Mediums are necromancers IRL already. I should talk to grandma :/ if i see anyone try to impersonate her again i'm eating their guts >I dislike to keep spirits in a cycle of suffering so I try to help them either find their flame or a spirit current that's amazing fren! >but some of them just decide that they like me too much and enter a complete submission pact for some reason Some people are just like that i think. wait..they could actually be "you" right? your own energies your own power just forgotten? Or did you have servants in a past life? >You are close to druid I think I like to consider myself a friend of nature of the earth, i used to think i'd end up as some kind of protector/guardian of a large land area but now it seems kinda shitty of a position i'll find my own power and help earth in other ways. >You must never ever work with a "deity" that makes contracts that you can just "fall" without noticing. Thanks for the warning but don't worry, i'm never doing that. I had some beings show up saying they were sent by so and so, the classic "let me merge with you i take energy you get crazy powers" yeah fuck that! I don't care what they look like i'm not doing that. >and starting a "war" with an another god because you are an arrogant retard is the stupidest thing. yeah..never had that happen ha-ha we're good now > With this I cannot "accidentally" cast a spell that comes from my more destructive abilities. I don't dare touch anybody with my energies if they're not hostile so this might be something i'll do. A useful limitation. but then again my problem come from limiting myself too much so idk. >The goal is finding your own "true will" where there are no second guesses or distractions anymore because you know what you are doing and it is in accordance with your own fully realized self Right become the real you. the realization of the spirit, it's so easy yet so difficult, but i am getting eventually i just have to realize i have everything i need within me. >Yeah there is a time where your "God" leaves you and you have to find him on your own. Like dark night of the soul? But don't worry about me, i don't really believe in "worshiping" I'd much rather have a parent-child relationship with a god and learn from them, that's how i see gods.

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>my school taught C# and Java skills are so meager I am not willing to say I know programming at all Schools are very bad at teaching actual programming imo, very little if any about making a real project from start to finish. so you really need to be passionate or else have to rely on a trial by fire at your internship to actually teach you the trade. >Seeing how monopolies buy up everything then I realized a decade ago that AI and pajeet codemonkeys will overrun the industry no matter what I am not fully convinced with AI replacing developpers but yeah everthing is getting outsourced to India, Philippines...etc :/ Nothing wrong with just dabbing, i am not that good at it either know some python c php html css etc, maybe i'll get motivated with a project and make something useful to others one day oh well. >I don't even have enough free time to use a proper linux distro Nothing wrong with Ubuntu but fuck snap and canonical >You are merging but merging is not always permanent but a temporal glimpse then you have to get accustomed to it and sometimes it turns out you have to merge further until a new equilibrium arises. Yeah like a preview of things to come they keep happening and it's getting on my nerve >Yes congrats you are literally me but "merger" That's good? It's funny how snippets of my personality ended up being my nature showing itself. and others are just bs to survive in the environment. >while you think the "fire" will win no matter what the "lazy" part of yours is like a quicksand so action is not always "triumphant" oh.. thanks to you i think i'm figuring it out, i'm more unified at least :p The kind of cockroachs was just a wondering spirit i believe. >oh rith I did this spell a decade ago and forgot it wow never realized it's still here and doing this much damage h-haha lol and what about spells cast in a past life.. I think the current "me" is being prepared into becoming a proper vessel for the real I, then it will die and the real me will be born in the flesh,essentially the current me and my body is an egg >The way the internal organs awaken can be weird. I'll try to build it when it's time, i'm just going by instinct. >Ask your guides about it as much as you can My understanding is changing everyday so some of the stuff i write become obsolete the next day funny. They actually helped and one of them helped me purify myself in the shower, ok so purify then recycle, and then use of earth and water to dislocate filter and decompose, not just fire and air. My bad almost became a fire elemental lol. I do have some trouble contacting them but it's self inflicted i believe isolating myself in my egg ?

>>831 >>1042 >Maybe it will clean you all of the energies that do not belong to you then you reignite yourself with your "life" flame True, but the egg thing make me think other things has to happen first. >Watch over with it so you don't send hostile energies through your heart. So many "veins" energy channels, no idea what to do with them, especially lust. >Fringe has some drowsexual wizards around they might show up if you ask drow related questions. Didn't know that! Maybe i'll make a thread about but just posting things here attract a lot attention good and bad. >She has a ritual dagger and engulfed in a weird living darkness Did you see an elder drow? >Srsly complicated. My spirit economy is weird.. Yeah you're describing a whole system here, i understand the concept but mine is obv not complete. > Even my mother changed the color of her eyes with her emotions Happens to me sometimes, they gain a red tint. > but it's important to not "get lost" in the body via fully believing that you are an other person I don't mind dying and becoming someone else, my spirit can make it work, but i guess you meant becoming that other person and then acting fully as that new "me" without an awakened spirit which yeah dumb. >Hard to explain. I have my own autism in this matter. Work together benefiting all involved ? sounds great much better than just paying for it. >Truth is not every "demon" is a proper individual. Some of them are even more lost than us. weird are you the owner of that body now or did it disintegrate ? >As I wrote down they can also possess you back or impart parts of their mind on your own thus you lose yourself and become them Is that really a problem if you can keep yourself? maybe i misunderstood but i have no idea how to do mindreading without becoming the person at least in part. > or you kill them with energetic overload or an energetic recoil will damage you hard oh.. yeah that would be terrible, killing someone outside of food or self-defense bad bad. >Truth is we constantly experience a sort of "co-possession" while talking and exchanging energies Yeah how in a convo whilst relaxed people start reading each other minds it's fun. >Yeah they are a thing but... You get karma a "spiritual STD" if you put your energies into things that you are not able to handle. If they are truly spiritless and not just asleep, why would taking it for yourself cause karma? Or do you mean it's only the case if you take that empty body and cause a mess like kill that body and rob the world of whatever that golem function is? maybe causing a mess in that empty human surronding/family. >Not to mention some people have entities and guardians that will give you quite the harsh lesson for doing that. Oh i'm only talking about true spiritless human, not just someone being a degenerate. >I even had an anima force that appeared like Shion from Higurashi in a dream Funny i started watching the anime recently should i have started with the vn? > Or they turn into other beings and now I am wondering wtf is this. Is this me? or some entity just wandered here. Yeah i have an army of fiery faries now that can mass cast with me it's funny. ugh need to control this better. >Yes imagine suddenly eating small animals out of instinct in public. The drow mind already make me want to eat raw and fresh innards. > You might need to visit sunflower on endchan if you keep this up my fellow touhou magician Oh i'm aware of the place, didn't interact too much theremight have talked to Yuuka long ago idk I think i seen some of your posts there? not trying to be rude and read your energies like that they just smell like you so i noticed. >wtf they mean besides cleaning out energetic pathways I think they appear where stagnation is ,they're not "evil" but it's a sign something is wrong. >They usually connect to dimensions or parts of your mind Oh i didn't mean it like that ! >Sounds like a win then?

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Yup! some lurking around but not as bad. almost all gone. Also had a giant one spiraling around me, i cut it in half and a larva then a white-greenish snake appeared with a crystal on it's forehead. > Do not focus on the appearance focus on the function. Alright, i just let them do their thing and see where it's going and when they're growing. Chinese dragon on the head and unicorn like on the forhead also appear as me wearing an animal skull weird. > If they have sentience you have to treat them that way if not you can just reabsorb them and let them become the original energy. What if they have sentience and want to serve by dying? >Why do you want to be horny anyway. Always wanted horns now for the why i can't tell for sure.

>>831 >>1042 >>1043 Right before i forget here is an attempt omitting details on how my energy were a few days ago. It's obsolete the only thing i can see now is an egg with spikes with all these energies mixed in and a few others. A lot of synchronicites with that btw keep seeing it. Am i supposed to break the egg with one of those horns? Things are speeding up my chakras are gone and now look like stones or crystals, also am making mudras naturally even though i forgot them fun! Say would you know how to absorb the love you gave to people without it affecting your memory of them? This turn them into dead memories or stone tablets.

>>1042 Ho boy. Was wondering what is with you earlier today which is usually a sign I will encounter you somehow. >Right, sometimes i forget humans are strong too, So do most humans. >the golden contain "memories" Which kind? What do you see? They can be carriers of your true personality. Hard to look into them rn so I will wait before you reply first. >i just know it pisses me off so bad i wanna punch it Ohoho. Iktf bro. That is a sort of "authority overtake" when your own authority or energy field is incompatible you will instinctively push away anything. I had that for quite a while. I remember reading about Falun Gong and I had a sudden anger an angry growl within like a dog. Li's influence is overtaking his "students" and if you look at the Falun Gong community you know something went ashtray quite the while ago. Masters who impart part of their "power" on their "students" are in actuality energetically possessing them. If you have guides or other entities or a strong magically oriented ego you will be pissed when someone shoehorns you into a belief system. And angels are powerhouses. Once they approach you will have to decide just how much authority you want to retain during the conversation. The problem is ofc is that for them to be able to "teach" or tell anything they will have to overtake part of your mind temporarily. Ultimately it is a lesson about arrogance stubbornness and humility but until you are able to operate as a "true mystic" don't engage with entities that anger you. It's not about being a bottom bitch. It's about learning proper respect. And respect is an energy type like love that allows fair and proper interactions between higher beings. If they or you are unable to maintain it then be careful. >I used to dislike the sun as well but now i'm more neutral towards it I never had problem with it but I can meditate only in the dark. The sun just screams "mundane duty time" for me. >you're some type of Dragon? I mean I was and I have dragon energy circuits and dragon entities around me and before monke humans overtook the planet the previous inhabitants were humanoid feathered lizard like being with beak like faces but that is like ancient history that no one remembers. Not to mention "dragon" is as wide term as the term "humanoid". All I remember is from a memory stone tablet where I learned to use a spear against winged snake like beings because they were like annoying birds like seaguls and quite vicious. And that spear fighting knowledge was so potent it granted me the resolve and focus to be able call lightning from the sky in a latter age... Srsly it's complicated and I didn't relive those ages yet because as "fun" it sounds they are history and as important as the shape of the egg you made an omelet a decade ago. It is important in my soul history because it contained an energy I had to retain but... who am I kidding I will have to look through those memories sometimes. It's just when I will start doing that my mind will change shapes and forms and I become a new person again and it takes time to go through that. I will have to prepare for that first. >like when they don't know they're even dead? Deep down they "know" but either don't want to accept it or they "forgot it already". It plays out differently for every person. It's a soul journey. You find your way in life or in death and that "way" might be just a way to retry again. >i wonder if i could cleanse him, i am not that nice to do it in a way it could affect me negatively, NEVER EVER CLEANSE ANYONE UNTIL YOU KNOW YOU HAVE ENOUGH POWER WITHOUT BEING AFFECTED BY THEIR ENERGIES. This is an important lesson. Even I forget it sometimes. But my lessons about compassion require that I go through foreign energies. It is about becoming the other person and you "learn their path" find the blindspots they missed and reconnect them to operate properly once again. Also only do it for people who you like and willing to carry along or at least know that they are the "same" as you. Some people have fates that they have to discover and meddling them is not always wise. Also cleansing must never be a powerwank from your side but an act of wisdom and kindness. You cannot save others without compassion. There is this in Buddhism where you must not save someone who is just making you "suffer" because their sorry disposition. Because then 1 you get attached to that suffering and 2 you will only do a "surface cleansing" and ignore the deeper issues thus might make things worse. Every person is a mystery and until you figure out their core issues and true nature. Meddling with their existence is not always wise. But may wisdom guide your way in this matter. IF you can help try to help but never make things worse out of incompetence or recklessness. Especially when you are still too weak to carry the burden of others. There will be a level when you can crush and crumble every useless burden and gift them a way to overcome their weaknesses but until that watch out. There is nothing worse than a retarded messiah complex blinding you into the worst scenarios. You know... like the guy... >someway to pay your karma Also you don't "pay" your karma. You "resolve your karma". Important because humans had karma before this materialistic understanding and resolving karma becomes far more easy when you figure out how it is carved into your being and what actions and energies break and dispel it. Extremely complicated but the core theory is quite simple once you get the hang of it. >i tried to eat the ash one of my guide told me to not do that Yeah this is why guides are important. >autism Tell me about it... I have so many retarded complexes within me that even I am amazed what kind of madness I house within without noticing for decades. >rest be scattered to earth or whatever RETURN WHENCE YOU CAME FROM. Yes that is the goal with karma. Finding the impurities of your own essence and let the "foreign essences return to their place". Thus no energy imbalance no "Payment procession" is necessary. Someone told me that I can ask demons and they have a note in their hand that shows them what kind of karma I have. When I read that my intuition went: >That's bullshit they don't need notes they can sense and see it like seeing that a guy in a MAGA hat is a Trump supporter. They are like tattoos and engravings on the body Later I found out I have a sort of "dharma eye" where I can understand and figure out spiritual teachings effortlessly so even if someone tells me something in an incomplete way sometimes I can still access their proper and higher meaning. Have to watch out to not get overwhelmed while reading spiritual texts. Truth can be explained only by infinite amount of words or with no words. Must watch out because the only thing that is more scary than the infinite madness is the complete silence that tells everything without words. >my flame not being perfect ofc it's not perfect. It levels up with you. Imagine a lvl1 wizard casting a lvl 100 flame that drains his mana drains his lifeforce then sets him on fire. That must not happen. The "perfection" of the flame must level with your own realized perfection. I too am a perfectionist but I must accept that TRUE PERFECTION is something I must not try and attain as I am not in a way and in a world where it is meant to be My theme is a sort of perfectionism vs practicalism. We are in the Kali Yuga a word of conflict hypocrisy and lies. Perfection will arise naturally once we return to the golden age until that we must watch over to know what we and our environment can handle. Once your power goes beyond the threshold the fabric of reality can handle you will see the importance of nuance and taking things "slow". But if your heart and soul tells you to go FULL THROTTLE then let no one stop you lol. I am the same way. Shame very few things can awaken my true passion nowadays. That is my lesson now. Understanding my

>>1046 >Understanding my ...passion in a balanced was >I'm figuring out some inner light rn Yes it's about figuring out then "seeing it". Everyone has inner light but it requires a "different eye" than the physical and it is far more subtle than the crude light of the sun. >i have access to much more energy than before, wait do i even have to absorb the space energy? i just generate it? i think the issue is my ego and how i see energy, might not need to soak up at all it's just there? Yeah you kinda figured out. "Energy gluttony" is not exactly wise because you will just explode. You need to know how to handle high energy (without getting mad wizard syndrome) and low or almost 0 energy without dying too. Energy has a purpose. This is why cleansing our own energy then the environment then parts of the world that interact with your "path" is important but never more than you can handle. And yes energy is ever present it cannot be created nor destroyed only transmuted and there are many energy types with different purposes. Feel and understand all of them. Just learned how to become a neutron star and how "energy density" is important in a way it "barely generates light". Energy is not just "light" many other things generate and contain energy. Everything is energy. >is it because you don't remember something important? ... I never thought about this way... But yes... to put it simply yes... >Oh so they're all different you connected? Yes? I am not sure what you mean by different but yes they are way different >like a hub of realities ? Also yes but that is not the main thing. It's like you computer have many photos and games. Every photo is a "different reality" and every "game" has different "laws" but they are all games. And "going home" would mean getting up from the computer forever and ever without looking back ;_; All these lives and realities will crystallize into a great conclusion then I move forward into a direction that is unknown and known from the start the same way. Kinda dislike talking about it because it is (still) beyond the scope of human feelings (for me). For me the demiurge is not a "final boss" but like a cat on the couch yawning. Some people are unable to understand that he represents the inner animal and how to master it. >I should talk to grandma :/ Might help. The dead can offer us great insights to those that are still trapped within the living flesh and the mediums can alleviate the pain of the restless souls. Especially family members. >if i see anyone try to impersonate her again Is that frequent for you? >wait..they could actually be "you" right? your own energies your own power just forgotten? Me a part of me an entity that impersonated me so much it wants to be me no matter what in a non disturbing way or they are natural energies that want to become part of my psyche so my magic becomes more balanced because we operate via similar or the same archetypal forces... The answer is yes but the explanation of why is quite long >Or did you have servants in a past life? In too many lives... I thought that I am a complete mundane from a completely mundane family then I had this eternally striving from rags to riches from complete ignorance to divine wisdom no matter the struggle kind of daredevil mentality then... it turned out I had similar mentalities in my past life and I have fucklarge inventories energies and favors I can collect from others and that kinda made me "sad" because "surpassing myself" is an obsolete concept as long I am not retaining myself completely not to mention "surpassing" is also meaningless because Greatness has a new meaning altogether... The Fool's journey is eternal and never the same nor comparable. Not to mention I did some extremely weird detours and I expected some "grand mission" or something and not a "do whatever" "here your personal Fateweaver" (and don't forget the lessons of karma). Now I have more toys to play with but now I know how easily they break or break others and it's NOT FUN. I have to calm my "do or die" nature. There was a time when my guides tried to recommend me a gf. Some random girl with a name and a vision googled her and even her nickname was the same as my guides told me. First I thought she might be my "twinflame" so I was interested. Then I asked my guides for her name again and they told me an another name. It turned out I don't have a "twinflame" because I had lives in other genders too and I am not a "split soul" so these women are just women that are compatible with my nature and may or may not been part of my past life journeys. >tfw no divine waifu in the flesh just compatible vessels for her so I can play out lessons WHICH IS REDUNDANT BECAUSE I WANT TO REDUCE MY OWN DEPENDENCE ON THE FLESH AND NOT INCREASE IT. Then I learn tantric practices with entities and feelings of true love and their different flavors that unlock energy channels and my feeling is that this would have been NICE to experience with a "true love" but in 90% of my lives women became boring fast or an absolute distraction from my path and if I "Infuse them with my love" they are real hard to leave without too much drama. Not to mention since I recovered my past lives while I was female and seen the CURRENT STATE of women nowadays I hate them even more. Technology and the social system takes care of them and their issues 99% and they bitch and moan like they have a "hard life" because they don't have a dick. BACK THEN YOU EITHER KNEW YOUR WOMANLY DUTIES OR DIED/GOT SLAPPED FAST but nowadays? While I was still disconnected from that I had a more "Ideal" view of women but after some of my memories and thought processes returned I knew that the only reason I don't have a loved one because I don't want one. I never encountered anyone who managed to light my inner flame in this life and even in the past very few managed to do it. This is one of my personal autism. I could "law of attraction" psychically locate read and reshape women but... once I do I will just realize I want to meditate and walk my own path and I cannot expect a "modern woman" to be able to keep up with me. Especially because I was a high channeler spirit for female "ritual warriors" back in the golden age so for me the "average woman" is like a mix of Reimu and Achilles... Learning about that was weird. Current women are between spoiled cats and goldfishes compared to them ;_; I know I will get a gf once I retain the form of the highest animus which is according to Jung is akin to Hermes Trismegistus but I don't want to break someone until my equilibrium and mastery returns. Every female fantasy novel is about how they want a dark and magic bf but that is their lustful fantasy speaking. Very few is capable going through with it and I hate to say this but one of my requirement I look in a partner is "durable" and not just physically but mentally. And let's not say how much durability women lost since the industrial age. Washing dishes and hanging clothes is "slavery and torture" nowadays. When I was a proper house wife my greatest fear was not being able to be good woman for my family or my husband dying in a way I cannot help him avoid it. But those where the mundane lives. There were some female lives that were "less mundane" and still a mystery for me. Let's say I did some retarded things and they had to be compensated via me incarnating into a female so my soul energies can balance out and I can "pull myself together" in the next incarnation. This requirement of 2 genders because hermaphrodites genetically and energetically are too imbalanced is annoying. Preparing my "fused soul" takes effort and clarity. This is the problem of seeing too many lives at once. At the start you have to focus on the "common theme" and let the details for a latter and calmer time.

>>1042 >I like to consider myself a friend of nature of the earth All humans must strive to be that but thx to the small hat tribe green parties and tendencies were hijacked and it's hard to be "environmentalist" when you have to associate with people who think immigrating people who throw around trash and outsourcing the industry to countries that have no regulations nor the logistics for clean production is a "solution" then they trash your local industry in the name of sustainability then expect money to magically appear... Greenhouse effect from international trade and overblown 3rd world industry? Nah. Cow farts? OMG WE MUST EAT BUGS OR WE DIE. Even global warming is over. We have climate change nowadays. But spoiler climate always changes. I told some people already that the only "good" thing will be when these leftist retards "win" is that they will starve to death within the first 2 months. Shame I don't want to die with them. They devour themselves all the time but sadly make people who care about the environment batshit insane once they say they care about the environment. Weak men hard times as usual. >i used to think i'd end up as some kind of protector/guardian of a large land area That's how it starts. You ground yourself to a location you work with the spirits you balance and harmonize your energies then you notice how you connect with every other place. As you help the spirits they will help you. >seems kinda shitty of a position You will have to understand if you are a "territorial" or a "nomadic"/wanderer wizard. Do you want a stable base or to eternally wander but "where" do you wander? I too wanted to be a wanderer but I have things to take care of first. No need to sit around. Great sages sit on their butt in a mountain for decades/centuries then they walk effortlessly once they know where to go and what to do. >i'll find my own power and help earth in other ways. That's the goal. Also "earth" is not that "weak" it needs to be "saved". Only those can save others who saved themselves already. And we are talking about saving humans here and not about saving planets. Those people that say "earth would be better without humans" are those who have no idea why humans and other sapient beings HAD to develop on earth. Even those who call earth a "loosh prison" have no real grasp of the gravitational forces at play. If earth is that much "evil" then "why are they here"? Are they also evil and serving a sentence or they are the perpetrators that made earth to be an "evil place". There are more principles at play besides "looshfarming". We must return to earth what we took from it then earth returns what belongs to us. Balance fairness and equilibrium must be maintained and everyone needs to know why are they here and where they will return once they are no longer attached. >I had some beings show up saying they were sent by so and so, the classic "let me merge with you i take energy you get crazy powers" Yeah it takes consideration to see what they are. At the start I sent away most of them nowadays if they have bad intentions they suffocate before they can approach me. Usually I only do it when I "know" it's an important step or I am too bored already. I am rarely bored nowadays :/ Not to mention some powers merge with me naturally because they are already "part of me" but a dormant version so they just get sucked in like the first breath after being born. Usually makes me question many things about my existence when that happens. The "oh rith this was always here I remember doing this when I was 5" kind of thing. >yeah..never had that happen ha-ha we're good now TEEHEE. MY BAD. yeah iktf >I don't dare touch anybody with my energies if they're not hostile so this might be something i'll do. Yeah I just had a dream about some vedic entities appearing then I made an "autooath" like speaking without me putting "effort" into speaking and while I was like "am I being possessed" then I realized that every word of the oath is something I am not just agreeing but would agree no matter what and as I realized this I exited from a body of mine that spoke the oath and complimented it with movements that represented with parts of existence and as I slowly drifted back into my human body a mustached blue guy just told me >this is vahra and not dharma then a flow of energy overtake my body. Took me a day to realize that was "vajra" then had to look up how you say the j as h at some places but very few know that. Had to look at like 3 pronunciation video and only in the comments someone wrote that it is pronounced like that. I require the assistance of the vedic and Buddhist traditions because western mysticism is still on the level of Christkikery and devil worship and going beyond it is not impossible but sometimes you require a higher help to balance things out. Local spirits don't always know how to operate the higher energies while higher gods don't understand the customs of the local environment so you have to bridge the worlds by yourself then let higher truth guide you forward. >A useful limitation. Yeah but it only goes for higher energies so psychic abilities born from hatred and other sexual or biofuel transmutations are not exactly "blocked". It's just I will not disintegrate someone because they looked at me funny. Maybe cause a headache or a cough max. Taming the inner devil takes time >but then again my problem come from limiting myself too much so idk Yeah no worries that is only needed when you become a living psychic anomaly. Like getting angry makes the walls crack electricity flickers people suddenly feeling ill weather changes without you commanding it... etc. Your desires become a force within that try to pull your energies into directions and this is why they are an attachment. Why the wandering mind needs to be fixed. It causes a special kind of karma/madness. You become the devil himself instead of enlightenment. Bound by the desires until you run out of fuel and collapse. Then you turn into an eternally hungry ghost slave to desires and your energies will bind you to a special kind of hell. Buddhists and Hindus talk quite a lot about those realms. Western religions are just "only Jesus/Messiah can do magic it forbidden for others or you go to hell" which is true. You will go to hell. The question is ofc. What will you do there? Pain and suffering is not just a punishment but might be a teacher too if you have the mind to understand it. >Right become the real you. the realization of the spirit, it's so easy yet so difficult, but i am getting eventually i just have to realize i have everything i need within me. I could have said "Yupp" and stopped my post there. Damm. Shame I don't have that level of restraint yet. >Like dark night of the soul? Yes and you wrote well in your previous sentence that "God was always within" and never without. Ever wondered why Jesus said God left him on the cross? Yeah he speed ran the dark night of the soul because of his own hubris. There is always a greater darkness that you will only see once you stop blinding yourself with your own light. Even I have to remember that from time to time. Awakening is not a singular event but a long journey within and without. Ofc there are different levels layers and accomplishments but my mastery is still too meager so I can compare and categorize them.

>>1042 >i don't really believe in "worshiping" Yeah and I literally suck at worshiping others. If anyone dares to say he is a "God" of sorts my energies go into a "prove it" mode so most entities don't even talk but appear and do what they meant to do and leave. This "dramatic foreplay" is not a necessity only if your ego requires it. The nature of God takes many forms. I remember when I had a dream about my guides explaining how offerings work and because I am at a juncture I have to accept them. I wanted to say to the people "I don't require them" but my guide told me to listen to their plea and understand the energies within them. We so don't understand the nature of God nowadays. As much as I want the return of the mystic schools they have no way becoming widespread. These truths need to be found by every person themselves. >parent-child relationship Parent-child Master-student Friends Sparring partners rivals enemies lovers. They will take all forms. Even the guides will change forms and even you will guide others through their path to complete the cycle forward. >so you really need to be passionate Yeah that kinda left me after seeing the current state of CS industry. >not fully convinced with AI replacing developpers Only codemonkeys and it will result in a "No one knows how the programs are working anymore" but we have that already thx to pajeetmaxing in the industry >Nothing wrong with just dabbing True if you have enough freetime for that. >they keep happening and it's getting on my nerve Yeah... same... >It's funny how snippets of my personality ended up being my nature showing itself. and others are just bs to survive in the environment. It usually starts that way. Then once you become the "master of your environment" you can attain higher forms of your being. >lol and what about spells cast in a past life.. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA >I think the current "me" is being prepared into becoming a proper vessel for the real I Don't forget "current (You)" is also part of the "real (You)". You are already part of yourself. Understand continuity how you connect through the past and future. Only saying it because I was "denying myself" because which part is and isn't the "real" "me" thus I was literally armwrestling myself. The human spirit has many heads and many arms. >then it will die and the real me will be born in the flesh Yeah ponder about what it means to die and being born. I am saying this because if your fear of death and desire to live is not balanced you will be... well... Whatever never forget that you die while going to sleep and reborn every morning. You will just go and unlock a higher version of this. There is a reason it is called "awakening". Also while you awake from sleep when the sun shines into your eyes with this YOU WILL FORGE YOURSELF INTO A LIVING SUN THEN AWAKE THAT DORMANT PART OF YOUR SOUL the fucking freak out my "self" did because I had some silly misconceptions about awakening I swear. >essentially the current me and my body is an egg You might have the better view on things here and not like mine. >hmm that looks like a star WHAT IF I BUILT AN INNER STAR FORGE >WHAT COULD GO WRONG Did you watch Haruhi and the part when she rampaged the astral when she was grumpy? So Kyon had to calm her down with a kiss? I suddenly understood why my guides told me I should get a gf months before my awakening after witnessing that. Back then I told them I want my wizard powers first then they told me that we will continue the stages of awakening then >I'll try to build it when it's time, Sometimes they "bloom" and "awaken" on their own. But yes they can be built too. I too had to implant some things also. >i'm just going by instinct. Yeah you are doing quite well so far. >My understanding is changing everyday so some of the stuff i write become obsolete the next day funny. This is why imageboards are great. You just write it down let it out of your systems get some responses maybe then forget it. This is not about writing a ONE TRUE BOOK but merely chatting. Also understandings and concepts are usually building blocks for higher yet more simple understandings. It's impossible to convey these things with words not to mention most things in spirituality have an eternal depth. A spell you did years ago might just suddenly "level up" and you remake yourself in a moments notice. Those people who say "I FOUND TRUTH" are usually still only at the beginning of the path. It is a sort if >I know nothing yet it feels like somehow I know everything you never know if you want to talk more or less. This confusion and doubt is also part of the path. This "objective scientific truth" mentality is a limitation but that doesn't mean foundations are not needed to be laid down. I remember when I realized I can summarize the whole understanding of myself via knocking in a way my "mind" will understand and instead of "talking" focusing only on the energies. I think what I am writing might sounds as "boasting" but the way it played out makes me almost ashamed. So many misconceptions on the beginning and while they were "wrong" all of them were necessary to ignite the energies. >I do have some trouble contacting them but it's self inflicted i believe isolating myself in my egg ? It is about finding a centralized point then using that as a "core" of your foundation and reexpand from yourself. A sort of BIG BANG. The birth of the universe. And because I "forced it" instead of slowly letting it happen my personality became quite haywire in the next year. But there was no other way. I knew I was going mad but I didn't care anymore because I knew I am unable to live on like this if I "stop". Had to go through a clean up after it. But the eternally calm seas lead my way. They still do. >True, but the egg thing make me think other things has to happen first. Yes it's a growth process. Listen to your heart to your energies ask the "egg" or the snake that makes it hatch. They speak. I can hear it but they don't speak in words they speak in feelings. You will understand them better. >So many "veins" energy channels, no idea what to do with them, especially lust. :| Same. Even tho I am wiring my meridians daily with or without the help of my guides

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>Did you see an elder drow? I have seen one and then left it that way. Seems like you have more? They are in a "ritual focus mode" and meddling here would be rude. >Yeah you're describing a whole system here, i understand the concept but mine is obv not complete Mine neither lol. This was merely the groundwork. >becoming that other person and then acting fully as that new "me" without an awakened spirit which yeah dumb. more akin >go into the other person and you get swallowed and completely forget that you are an outsider spirit and move on like nothing happened At that way you are not "possessing" but merely being absorbed. It's an ego balance and mastery. Humans house many foreign spirits without realizing. Some cause problems while some grant boons. Even the church acknowledges the holy spirit. God=very omnipotent very benevolent Jesus=also very omnipotent very savior also probably God? but in an earthly way that can save you? holy spirit= all the above but still different? Implanting the cross within the energy body so you can "crucify yourself" through the prayer rituals I swear... who came up with that??? >Work together benefiting all involved ? That's the dream and my intention when it's possible. But sometimes you have to realize a natural order and realign it. The problem is not just with "tricksters" but sometimes not even spirits know what is causing the anomalies you are supposed to "know" how to solve. Real hard being the Shrine Maiden of Paradise sometimes you know. Especially when some problems are not solvable by beatings...

>>1042 >than just paying for it I hate "paying" it just results in a "spiritual materialism" and "spiritual greed". I am not saying everyone who "pays" and collects "energy money" is "bad" but my main principles "dislike" the notion but it mostly stems from my current distrust towards the monetary system. This is why I converse with the spirits ask them which is their "operating energies" then sync my own and their power then a balanced way of operation arises. Ofc it's not always this simple. Some energies are not really nice to work with including my own. >are you the owner of that body now or did it disintegrate ? Both? It kinda served as a stop gap measure so I can operate the "hellish layer". If I don't go to hell hell comes for me but I beat the living shit of the hellish invaders so... I possess a deadbeat overtake it then suddenly I am in hell :) or :( Now I can listen to the next lessons... Which is about not screaming into the abyss then dumping half my energies into hell without noticing because then they turn into hellish invaders that I beat again thus continuing the cycle. I learned there that my energy body was constantly breaking and detaching because psychic powers are about being able to "externalize the mind" and once you overdo that it becomes the "wandering mind" problem. >Is that really a problem if you can keep yourself? Is that NPC part/major component of an economy? can you take him out without causing problems will you give it shelter and food does it not house a dormant spirit is it not part of a spirit economy of an another person/entity who will notice? Why would you keep it yourself? Are you a soul/body hoarder? What is your purpose with them? These questions need to be answered for yourself first then explain/mark the "purpose" of that "taken" being. You cannot do things "on a whim" because once you are that way then other "whimsical" entities might approach you. Especially if they are pissed. >but i have no idea how to do mindreading without becoming the person at least in part. Same but "becoming part of his subconscious" is different from overtaking his guiding forces beating his guardian forces and overcharging his nerve system until he pledges eternal submission or dies trying. >Yeah how in a convo whilst relaxed people start reading each other minds it's fun Balanced people and communities can do this so naturally but the "diverse" and malicious hordes of the current world? Yeah there is a reason why things are this way in the modern world >why would taking it for yourself cause karma? Why would buttsex put shit into my peehole??? "empty humans" usually fill themselves up with the shittiest rotten energies because their circulatory system is not equipped with dealing with it. (higher golems are different but you will not take that easily because they have defenses and alert systems) Those people who "die within" are usually filled with shit and they become zombies that execute their patterns until they die. You don't really want to "Insert your psyche into them". >rob the world of whatever that golem function is? maybe causing a mess in that empty human surronding/family. Also they are usually part of egregores and spirit economies and once you take one you attack the whole egregore. Which is not always bad because some egregores deserve to be destroyed for causing some problems already but that doesn't mean you can just declare war on zombie hordes without a hitch. But don't worry you will see that. Once the malevolent egregore is knocked out they start functioning properly and sometimes even manage to retain their spirit. Especially after your fire cleanses all their "sins". Real complicated issue. Talk it out with your local spirits whenever you fight zombie hordes and egregoric patchworks and you have more than needed. >Oh i'm only talking about true spiritless human, not just someone being a degenerate. Yeah if you are able to draw that line then you are more advanced than me. "golem souls" "egregoric drones" also appear as "spirits" they are just super simple. Not to mention some main spirit can stay dormant so while that mundane just executes simple patterns you "walk into it" and suddenly someone grabs you and starts questioning what you are doing. There are patrolling spirits that hate "tricksters" and will mark them as such. Every person is a mystery. Never forget that. Simple people are the best hiding places for dormant spirits. You can just sleep through some incarnations. But that doesn't mean that every spirit is the "owner" of that body. Sometimes you can go and do a bitte papieren and ask the spirit why are they fucking with this mundane and get rid of them because turning empty humans into degenerates is the worst thing in this existence. It's a waste of human resources. Those who think they "benefit" from that deserve fire and flames and everything else that comes after it. >should i have started with the vn? Never had time to read it. >i have an army of fiery faries now that can mass cast with me it's funny. ugh need to control this better. yeah. Starting random fires is not fun. Even I feel smoke in my nostrils while looking at them. >The drow mind already make me want to eat raw and fresh innards Yeah wtf is with that. This comes from an early ritualistic method. So hard to decipher it. >might have talked to Yuuka long ago idk Yeah she goes around >not trying to be rude and read your energies like that they just smell like you so i noticed Yeah my energies are not really "reserved" so it's quite noticeable. >I think they appear where stagnation is ,they're not "evil" but it's a sign something is wrong. Yeah googled it back then. They are native american spirits signifying evolution and other things similar to that. They are a good sign. >white-greenish snake appeared Yeah I had and have many. They are sometimes self aware energy circuits >i just let them do their thing and see where it's going and when they're growing Yes >What if they have sentience and want to serve by dying? Then grant them their wish if that is truly their wish. >>1044 >on how my energy were a few days ago Those are the major meridians around your organs. Quite the nice inner sight. >It's obsolete Yes it's evolving >Am i supposed to break the egg with one of those horns? The chicken breaks the egg as it hatches when it's ready if you break it too early... you are supposed to give it warmth and energies but. Hmmm. I wanted to say you are the nest and the chicken is growing in the egg then it grows into the nest but... something is there that may need not exactly "breaking" but a sort of "nudge". Talk to the egg talk to your energies. >Things are speeding up my chakras are gone and now look like stones or crystals Yes they change forms and even I had to abandon the chakra system because the meridians are more complex that that. And yes they can appear as stones crystals mandalas flowers blooming etc >also am making mudras naturally even though i forgot them fun! Yes that happened with me too. Still does, It becomes like a reflex because the energy tells you how to connect them. Your energy body is "breathing"

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>Say would you know how to absorb the love you gave to people without it affecting your memory of them? Absorb it. You will need this love then as you make a breakthrough create a "solar fusion" you will reattain a new energy a new love then you give it back tenfold >This turn them into dead memories or stone tablets. You literally inject it back and the stone tablets become even more colorful. Also your "memories" are already "dead". Saturn explained to me how I can resurrect any and every type of memory be it mine dead living or from others once I know how to find them and how to grant them "their spirit back". No moment is lost all is recorded. The question is how much you want to see it again. >38k characters wtf

What will happen if I sacrifice animals to the demons from The Lesser Key of Solomon after invoking them? Will I get anything in return? I'm not talking about animals similar to cats or dogs but animals such as rats, lizards, flies, mice, ants, etc.

>>1053 The effect depends on the value you personally have invested in it. Back in the old days killing a chicken really meant something because chickens had real value, they were one of your sources of food. Sacrificing some pest animal or insect you find running around will almost definitely do nothing, it might even be interpreted as an insult if you try to do something stupid like sacrifice an ant. I'm reminded of an episode of House MD where a patient who's a millionaire businessman is convinced that if he gives away all his money and assets it'll somehow allow his son with a terminal illness to be healed, he does it and it ends up actually working... think along the lines of that.

This might not be the best place to ask this, but I feel like I've fucked up. I thought I was getting on the path to /fringe/ wizardry a while ago, but now I've all but lost my will to do anything. My mind keeps running through all the mistakes I've made, so I'm all but convinced that most of my "problems" are just the consequences of my dumb decisions, and that I'm unknowingly just an asshole that's getting what he deserves. Of course, that might very well be the case for all I know. I don't want to ask for too much from Anons here, but do any of you have any insight on what I should do? I hope it's just some entity messing with me. btw if this post is too mundane/shitty/whiny then mods can feel free to delete it

>>1053 >What will happen if I sacrifice animals to the demons from The Lesser Key of Solomon after invoking them? Why would you do it in this order? If you already invoked them, just ask them what their price is and they'll tell you? Normally they won't appear unless you pay them first so this implies you already offered them something for them to come to you. I don't recommend invoking them at all tbh. You may not see the difference at first glance but the method for them should be an evocation and when performing it you already offer something up, while maintaining your wish with clarity in your mind. If what you prefer is a long term relation of guidance, you may want to discuss the terms for this, but you should still not invoke them unless the contract is already formed, as you are then inviting someone into your mind and body without a pre existing contract to regulate their access to your life. Don't do this. If you want to "throw money at them" and then tell them to do something, you can do that, but make sure it has a corresponding value for the thing you ask. It's not so much about the value of the animal in regular terms, it's your dedication into the process. If you were to set a trap to catch a live rat and then ritually killed it on a stone altar with sigils and incense using a decent knife (can be a kitchen knife as long as it's something you are comfortable with) this would possibly work because you dedicated time and effort into understanding the animal, its habits and how to catch it, all for the purpose of the evocation. The NWOs sacrifice children, sometimes by having ritual abortions, this is not something you should do even if you think it's fine morally. These ancient demons aren't particularly impressed by this, and aside from the karma of the act, it's basic bitch magic of little value. They'll accept the offer so it doesn't go to waste, but it's stupid and ineffective. Being evil in itself has no value. You could offer them humans as a sacrifice without personally doing anything to them as long as you have a "claim" on them. If you have a enemy who caused you much trouble, where this person is indebted to you, you can use that person as an offering because from a metaphysical standpoint you own them. Then you express that "the offering is this person" then you state your wish. If they accept it, you will know.

>>1056 >but I feel like I've fucked up. I thought I was getting on the path to /fringe/ wizardry a while ago, but now I've all but lost my will to do anything Yes that is how it goes. You have a surge of passion then you get stuck in the mud of lethargy and you have to find an inner TRUE WILL instead of a simple urge towards spirituality and figure out a way to work towards your own awakening. >My mind keeps running through all the mistakes I've made, so I'm all but convinced that most of my "problems" are just the consequences of my dumb decisions, and that I'm unknowingly just an asshole that's getting what he deserves Yes that is how shadow work starts. Your issues are energetically buried within you and they take up space. You have to flush it out. You will relive every negative thing you thought and felt flush it out then you become a new person once it's finished. Guilt and shame are also attachments that need to go. >do any of you have any insight on what I should do? Yes. Find the source of those thoughts understand if they have a meaning to you or not then move on. If it's truly something that offended someone then make up for it if it's some minor silliness move on with it. Clear up your own misunderstandings and look for a higher truth while doing so within and without. We all make mistakes. We have to make up for them. >I hope it's just some entity messing with me I am not sure if that would be "better". Shadow issues can and will be exploited by others be their physical or spiritual forces. You have to solve them either in this life or in the afterlife. >btw if this post is too mundane/shitty/whiny Shadow work will be about your emotions surfacing and you will bitch moan cry rage and howl like a madman so all of those mundane imprints can flow out from you so you can retain the full power of the spirit. Society makes us reserved. It demands us to be "manly" then it emasculates us every day. You will have to overcome that programming. Also the most popular thread on fringe is the doge thread... If you want to know how true mundane whining looks like go there and read the flagless posts. Asking for help and guidance is not whining. It takes bravery to ask for help sometimes. Even I had to learn that the hard way. >This might not be the best place to ask This is the question thread. This is exactly the best place to ask. Feel free to ask whatever.

>>1056 >the path to /fringe/ wizardry That was your first mistake. I recommend you do results based magick, as much of it as you can. Health, wealth, sex, or solving daily issues. Learn to attain control over your mundane everyday shit with magick. Disregard your lack of motivation, or actually fix it. But basically what I’m telling you is to bring your magick down to Earth. And remember that it is not escapism. You still need to live your life regardless of what you do. You can’t escape that. Sadly.

>>1058 >find an inner TRUE WILL Some good timing for you to post that. Lately, I've been wondering what it'd be like to abandon my ego/superego/id. What would it be like? Would I just become a doormat that lets absolutely anything happen to him no matter what it is? If a deranged murderer went on a killing spree in my areanot that it'd actually happen and he came to me, would I have any impetus at all to prevent myself from becoming his victim? Since you said that, I'm suddenly doubting that I'd be completely bereft of any impetus to do anything at all if I got rid of my ego. Does the true will lies within the awareness, or somewhere lower? Currently, I'm thinking that I'd like to re-program my id & ego instead of abandoning it all; all my superego needs to do is remember not to try too hard to wrangle my id to the point of it becoming counter-productive.

What are some energy practices to target my throat and butthole? This is not a shitpost

>>1069 I would start by making better jokes for a 69 GET >This is not a shitpost U sure?

>>1069 You need to summon satan of the butthole. This is also serious. Take a shit in the woods and use only leaves to wipe.

>>1069 Start using a bidet.

How can I best get started using the lesser key of solomon? consciously i know it is real but my spiritual emotions went away years ago and even though i know spirits are real i just feel a fog of the lack of wonder and spirituality. i miss going outside at night with a candle and really being afraid and having a sense of awe, when i do it now i just feel like i'm forcing myself to do it and it feels mundane. everything feels so mundane. do i have a really shitty entity attachment?

>>1093 If you have no clue, start from the beginning with Ars Notoria. The spirits in Goetia (book 2) are very powerful and not something to mess around with unless you know what you are doing, you need to be able to read/interpret their sigils. I can't personally say there is much to "work" with aside from learning communications with these spirits, after that it's more like a phone book. What you use it for is up to you.

>>1093 You seem to be seeking a thrill, which is a stupid reason for evoking demons. Grab a copy of one of the Gallery of Magick books and use it to bring back joy and wonder into your life.

Why is it so hard to ask the correct question? I am not even sure if I fear the answers or just simply know the answers will be just a beginning of further questions. To find something that was always there you have to completely lose yourself so you can realize it's importance otherwise it always gets glanced over. Frustration. The frustration which comes from the fact that I either supposed to know the answer already or the way to find it but to hear the answer I have to understand my internal turmoil first. Fear and suffering are shackles for mundanes while confusion is the bane of gods. I really like Buddhism and Hinduism because of their meditation technology. I consider it technology because it can be as groundbreaking as being able to read or make a fire. But for some reason I hesitate. I don't know why. The answer always comes from within but is it wise to fear that it might come from the outside? What created confusion? Was it chaos or the first being that created chaos? Was the first being confused when he created confusion or he knew what he was doing. Was it an accident or deliberate? Are these questions without answers or they need to be found by everyone by themselves? If others answer the question will they take away your growth or fuel it? It's all relative and subjective. But it feels like there is a point saying these things and asking the questions. Maybe asking the wrong question will reveal an answer good enough. Maybe I will figure out why I posted this. Was it for me or was it for others? I don't even know if I fear or crave the silence anymore

Guys, listen. Let’s do stuff. Like things in the astral to have an effect IRL and stuff. Geopolitics and shit. Let’s overthrow governments with our wizardryand all that.

>>1123 Already tried that with "winter chan" on /pol/. Taught me the lesson that you shouldn't give a gun to a monkey. Mass magic can't be done in a leaderless fashion, then it just feeds the lowest common denominator, which is probably racism or sex or something. Imageboards can only be used to feed your magic by using its posters for energy, or to spread your magic by sharing the sigil so more people see it.

>>1124 too late

>>1125 I really like this meme. It explains an astral dynamic too well. You know the name of that swol dude right? His name is Schwarzenegger. Which can be read as Schwarze Negger. Hope your german is good enough to translate that. All he managed to change to nigger was his own name. This is how "changing things on the astral works" if you have no idea what you are doing. Whenever I see this image I get reminded of that. Arnold Black Nigger changing the english language. Not to mention zoomers use an extreme amount of rap nigger slangs nowadays. That also counts as changing the language into niggerish. Hope you like the "result" of that meme magic you just posted. His name is read as Schwarzen Egger btw but everyone puts such an emphasis on that N while saying his name you might think that's where you divide his name. I read somewhere Egger means coroner or something similar but I am not sure anymore. It's olde Austrian german after all. The german language was not always as unified as most people think nowadays I always wonder if the maker of that meme realized the irony of making that pic with Arnie or it was a coincidental irony as most memes are. >>1123 Also enjoy learning about astral metapolitics my nigger. Enjoy learning the threads of Fate that formed thousands of years ago and will form further without disturbance. Enjoy finding out how The Game is played You just lost it btw >Let’s overthrow governments Also I am not the CIA. I am not doing that. Not to mention western spheres of influence are deemed "criminal organization" by several higher astral beings because the way they operate is everything but governance. You don't "overthrow" them. You just let them collapse then make sure the next cleanup will get rid of every parasite that was responsible for that degeneracy. There is a difference between actual governments actual countries with cultural and historical foundation with heavens and hells and the egregoric nightmare slopfest that is the USA™.

>>1124 Is it even possible to do imageboard style meme magick these days? I haven't bothered to make any maymays for years because it just feels like casting pearls before a bunch of Roombas. Cuckchan is almost entirely bots and with the exception of /fringe/ pretty much all 8ch stragglers are that "lowest common denominator." The memes that gain traction now all seem either AI generated or designed by committee, and approved from the top-down by whatever platform they're spread on.

>>1126 >The Game

>>1127 > to do imageboard style meme magick these days Meme creation belongs to a hidden elite nowadays more than before. The mechanics of memery may have always originated with a small group of OG creators, but it has been consolidated into a very small group with time. The time when OG memes were created on 4/pol/ ended with Ebola-chan. Trump-posting was a psyop using /pol/ as a method of dissemination. Because memes refer common cultural artifacts which were previously immaterial, then are put into an image with text, they need to first exist in the mind-sphere collectively. The OG creator merely comments on the mental meme and then the group recognizes it. I've spent time in the places which are good at the process of meme creation, but it doesn't necessarily mean the memes I now make get any foothold. They have all the components of a real meme, but they refer very small things. Kohlchan/int/ is the last meme source of influence, behind some well known images posted on 4chan now. It's like the 4channers really can't create anything new at all. Some AI frogs that are still around were first posted by me on /x/, after I saved them from early AI art threads on KC/int/, I know it originates from a single thread in like 2021 because only those I saved and reposted on 4chan are still there. Some other common memes like the Qui? guy were also from a single thread on /int/ reposed on 4/x/ by some other crossposter. It's really very limited exchange between sites.

>>1123 You can do that by yourself easy. See the "Psionic Mayhem" book here >>1101

>>1128 Flash was so fucking approachable.

>>1134 But I want to do it with friends. How do I prevent the unbridled amount of autism in this thread's long posts from slowing my browser down to a crawl and crashing it?

>>1137 Get a better browser

>>1137 jfc this is why people hate phoneposters

>>1140 Which one do you recommend? I'm using a Chrome derivative. On windows. Scrolling is incredibly sluggish and this is a gaming PC. Question. What can I do to avoid forgetting about what I've talked about with entities when I go into trance and connect with them telepathically? Other than writing it down right after, or recording it. What techniques do you use if at all?

>>1142 >Which one do you recommend? None. All of them suck on their own. I used a well put together palemoon in the past then had a psychic lashout where I killed my poor laptop had to reinstall everything then I realized the palemoon furry devs ruined the browser and the only reason it worked was because I didn't update it for years so it does not break my addons. Currently I use vivaldi for my 300+ tabs open good goy browsing experience and palemoon for the 8chinz... I should get something better already but the browser developers went so retarded in the last 5 years I am not even sure anymore. All browsers suck and 8chan got a script update so I am not sure what breaks for you. We are not even at 400 posts. It shouldn't break that easily. Not to mention >Chrome derivative Can be anything. Even Vivaldi is chrome derivative but it tries to make sure it is not wasting as much resources and whores out your data constantly but I would not get surprised if someone says they do. So hard to get an IT JUST WORKS browser nowadays. >Other than writing it down right after, or recording it Yeah that is the pleb advice but is more reliable than my way especially for beginners. >What can I do to avoid forgetting about what I've talked about with entities when I go into trance and connect with them telepathically? First of all it depends on the depth of your trance and the real trick is to learn to connect to the feeling or the energy you felt during the talk then suddenly you remember everything. That is how I do it anyways. I dislike journaling. Ancient sages had no papers nor electric toys with them and they managed to figure these things out. Not to mention I couldn't be bothered writing it down. If I forget something important then I go into a deep introspection to figure out what is obstructing my memories. Memories have a signature too. Usually energies representing the feelings and the mindset you had while creating that memory. Try to figure out your own spiritual signature and how it changes during trance. Not to mention some experiences are not down to earth enough so they can make an imprint on your physically bound mind. Not all things can be translated into mundane concepts. For that you have to find a corresponding mundane concept and upgrade it so it can contain higher spiritual truths too.

>>1142 >Which one do you recommend? Unironically this: https://www.xda-developers.com/mint-browser-xiaomi-lightweight/ My phone can't open imageboards anymore after Chrome updated itself into becoming unusable. This thing works though.

>>1143 > Ancient sages had no papers nor electric toys with them and they managed to figure these things out Yeah because they made an entire culture out of carving their stuff into stone slabs and painting them with animal fat, ash and minerals in a way that still lasts.

>>1145 Yeah I know. I have some places on the astral where there are only parchments and stone walls with information detailing the existence of reality since creation. Not an easy read. A good book can change your life as the saying goes but those things will change more than that.

>>1144 Thanks. But Brave works well on my phone. The problem is on computer. >>1145 Don’t forget songs and stories. Those encoded a lot of knowledge. >>1143 I’m not sure I would be called a complete beginner, although learning never ends. I’m the poster above that adopted about using fluidic impregnation on camwhores. Anyway, thanks. I’ll meditate on that. By the way, what is the meaning of being swallowed whole by a spirit?

>>1148 *asked Not adopted.

>>1148 >Don’t forget songs and stories Yeah even I have to listen to songs and witness legends from entities so I can make a breakthrough. >I would be called a complete beginner I don't think you are but if you are not big on introspection and memorywork or other memory palace techniques then it might take practice to get the hang of it. Some people have memory servitors or tulpas for this. I just connect to internal channels so for me further personalization is not really needed for my internal processes but sometimes I need to listen to my guides how to unlock parts of my mind further because it's not simple. I never really bothered to build photographic memory skills because I think it makes your mind too bound to the mundane reality illusion because what you see is more important than what you think in your head so I am never sure if I could say if my memory skills are superb or not. Like most people around me cannot operate without reminders and stickers and I am only willing to get a shopping list if I need to get 10+ items and they are highly specific items. Otherwise I am not willing to let my own mental skills dampen. The only reason why I forget things because I tend to daydream too much while shopping and that makes me detach from the energy current of the memory. This is the problem with the wandering mind. I am trying to fix it for a while. Had to realize my mind was built from the wrong energies and it only works on command if I invoke those energies and those energies are too fallible to work with long term. Figuring out how 'emptiness' works can be truly a pickle. >what is the meaning of being swallowed whole by a spirit? Depends. Some spirits are like egregores and that means you are part of it now so you can traverse through that maze. Some spirits were unable to swallow me. There was a demon girl who tasted my essence then it blew her up and she vomited a pure darkness then she left. Or I ate spirits and demons and spit them out. Or a spirit within me appeared and ate the entities so I had to tell it to stop doing that. There was a time when I traveled the Shinto realms and as I bowed in respect by instinct at the outskirts a large Pagoda with faces and arms appeared in my vision and as it "accepted me" it turned into a giant female entity grabbed my body and swallowed it. Since that I am able to work with their traditions. Every level of the Pagoda resonates with different levels of initiation and internal/energetic issues. Try to talk or go into that spirit and see what happens or if you or she transformed at all. It truly depends on the spirit. If it was in a dream it might mean you are being devoured by energies that are beyond your control but if it was during meditation it might be a protection from other forces or a sort of initiation. Hard to say. >although learning never ends Yeah but sometimes you have to unlearn things so you can learn something truly useful. Can be real annoying how it works. This is the problem when you have mundane concepts with prejudices and misconceptions within your head and you have to break your misaligned preconceptions before your memory can accept a higher spiritual truth. >Anyway, thanks. I’ll meditate on that Yeah that's how you do it.

I'm using Vivaldi now, and opening any thread makes scrolling extremely laggy due to your savagely long effortposts.

>>1212 Get more RAM.

I'm reading Dianetics and I can imagine why certain interests and forces would not like this information to become common knowledge. The circus around scientology now makes complete sense. >>1214 Is 24 GB not enough? lmao

>>1218 You sure your PC is not full with malwares and spywares? I don't know what camwhore sites are loaded with nowadays not to mention the amount of spywares win11 is equipped but you might need to look at them a little. Also use the scrollbar or the top and down buttons on the right top of the site and you don't need to scroll the entire thread or I have no idea how the question thread can "lag" otherwise. If you read them slowly it shouldn't lag it only lags if you scroll so fast you don't read them just want to reach the bottom ASAP. Also the site got a script update like a month ago and it causes some weirdness from time to time.

>>782 >absolute symmetry is uncanny, a boob is always bigger, same for testicles, an eye more droppy that the other, that would be normal. I managed to reach a deeper understanding of the meridians and energy flow and I had to acknowledge this truth. I was too blinded by this "spine centric" model which is dead set on the golden middle and keeping the sides in perfectly symmetric balance. But the human body does not have it's organs in perfect symmetry at all. It is just unnecessary. 2 Livers just take up too much space and other nuances like that. For some reason I was always deadset on balance and symmetry. This is an another manifestation of a problem I always noticed as a theme in my life. Perfectionism vs Practicalism. Practicalism or pragmatism always wins but it just doesn't feel like a true win but a mere compromise. Started to read Atlas of Acupuncture and it takes me quite the time to read it because whenever it describes a meridian flow I am checking how the layout appears for me within my body through my inner eye and I am kinda reminded that my anatomy knowledge is quite barebones where the fuck is the spleen again but it truly gave me insights as I am fine tuning my body. Just realized how I am blocking several energy flows without noticing and because of that my organs are unable to function properly in some cases. My reflux which was a problem since my teens was solved because I noticed the faulty energy flow in the lower parts of my stomach. I had minor energetic treatments done already but I always focused on the top of the stomach as the faulty problem while it was the lower parts of the ABS and some other fuckery with the bladder not having enough energy so it is unable to relax or tone the muscles in a way it can close the upper part of the stomach. Now I can lie down after eating instead of having to wait at least 5 hours. Ridiculous how minor this problem was and it is extremely widespread because of some stress related energetic symptom that plagues the modern humans. I am unable to pin down what is main cause of that. I get always reminded that my knowledge is still superficial.

Anybody here ever had an in person teacher? I'm not talking about being part of some gay LARP organization like a Golden Dawn off-shoot filled with boomers, I'm talking about a legit 1 on 1 apprenticeship with a genuine magician/sorcerer.

>>1264 >ever had an in person teacher? Not personally in a serious 1 on 1. I do know someone who did this with Order of Nine Angles though. That's the esoteric aspect not available to Niners but only for those who take personal contacts and engage in a Nexion. Personally only had personal contact with Falun Gong assistants in different places, but that's not meant to be an apprenticeship thing because they lead the local group rather than doing personal 1 on 1 sessions.

Mundane people say that smart people don't have any common sense, which makes me wonder; do mundanes receive common sense from some type of spirit? I'm imagining that when smart people incarnate, they don't contact that spirit prior to their incarnation because they think they'll learn more without it and are smart enough that they won't need it to survive.

>>1267 i think that discussion should be started with defining "common sense", some inherent knowledge, or normie hivemind? a

Why do you indulge that idiot youtuber with answers? You can tell he lets his programming talk for him. Why do you bother?

>>1264 A couple of times. They were brilliant or adepts in some aspect, and incredibly flawed humans in others. It was weird because I like to imagine myself as a very accomplished initiate if not an adept, but these people at times seemed way below my level. It made me wonder if I'm just fooling myself or if true adepthood is actually attainable.

>>1271 youtuber? lol

>>1271 >that idiot youtuber Which one??? >You can tell he lets his programming talk for him You don't have a fascination with breaking the programming of others? Like how much it can handle what are it's limits how it operates and where it stems from? It's like making a chatbot swear or say something it is not supposed to say. It's about breaking the unbreakable seeing the invisible. Playing a game that was never supposed to be played. Trust me the programming people operate with 90% of the time are flimsy as hell. It's quite interesting to find something with staying power. If it holds together too well it means it has a greater underlying truth within which means you can learn from that programming a thing or 2. >Why do you bother? Hard to explain why I even bothered to reply to this post when I don't even know who are we talking about from the start.

If you don't know what I'm talking about, the question wasn't for you, I'm sorry.

>>1278 What if I know the answer but I am so displeased the way the question was worded I am unwilling to give you the answer you seek? >I'm sorry Hope you do.

>>1270 I'm referring to the mundane definition of common sense; I was gonna just c/p the google definition which is "good sense and sound judgment in practical matters.", but honestly, that seems pretty vague. I guess I'll ask mundanes tomorrow about how to define common sense. Anyway, when I was writing the post, I was assuming that common sense is granted to normalfag mundanes by some kinda egregore. Just because you can incarnate as a smart guy, doesn't necessarily mean that it'd be a better idea than incarnating a a guy of ordinary intelligence; you'd probably learn different lessons that way. That makes the notion of common sense being inherent knowledge make sense to me.

>>1271 are you talking about the smiling man video?

>>1294 Indeed.

I was meditating on some long term goals when I experienced an unexpected realization which I’d like your thoughts on. I became suddenly aware that I was merely an ape, and for better or for worse, extended this to all humanity. Everything, from little personal habits, to scratching an itch, to regular social behavior became very heavy with this baggage of animality. I make an effort to be mindful of my actions, trying to keep in mind the elevated reasons for doing what I do, which has been nothing but beneficial for me. But now it feels like the automated routines of an animal. I don’t find myself treating other people differently, but I don’t have enough experience to tell if these thoughts are intruders from god knows where trying to interfere with my journey, a challenge for me to overcome, or a sign of progress. It’s been three days and it hasn’t gone away, so I assume it’s not a fluke and I must make something of it. I wouldn’t call the feeling unbearable, but it is rather over-sobering if that makes sense. The habit of reducing humans to “merely animals” is nothing new obviously, and I think all of us were exposed to that kind of rationalist/realist philosophy at an early age. But this is the first time I can say I genuinely felt it was true. It feels like I am almost detached from my waking, now ape, moments sometimes. And I prefer not to think of everyone around me as animals, but if I was meant to get used to it, maybe someone who also gone through this offer advice on how it can be a learning experience?

>>1296 >I became suddenly aware that I was merely an ape There was a time when I was 11-12 that I had a sudden and intrusive perception that humans are unnatural, and that they should have fur. I felt like people around me and myself were genetical misfits for being hairless. That they are all hairless apes, and that this is an abomination. This experience kept resurfacing for a long time, and still sometimes do, even if I have gotten over the feel that I would need to have fur to be normal as a being. Nude skin still makes me feel uneasy for this reason, it's somewhat better if they're very black, then it kind of looks like fur because it as least has colour.

>>1296 >I became suddenly aware that I was merely an ape Actually that realization is better than I had when I was in my early psychic years. Back then I thought the human body is a machine. A machine slave to my will that has the sole purpose of letting my will manifest and carry me on my journey no matter what. Feeling tired feeling pain? STOP BITCHING WE HAVE WORK TO DO. YOU WILL GET YOUR "REST" WHEN WE ARE DONE. ENJOY YOUR NUTRIENTS BECAUSE YOU CLEARLY NEED IT. CannotbelieveIamstillnotabovetheseneedsyetffs. And similar thoughts like that. Then I realized the ways of the "Berserkers" where they invoke beast level LIVE AND FIGHT NO MATTER WHAT emotions and how to use that to send my bodily or mental faculties into an overdrive... Took me time to realize that I neglected the "maintenance mode" of the body. The subconscious machinations that try to keep you alive. I only realized it nowadays that my body is producing extreme amount of yins so it calms down my retardedly aggressive yang circuits... but nowadays I am not even sure which is the yin or the yang because they change polarities and qualities as they move in the body and the energies have too much polar shifts as they travel... whatever back to apes. I figured something out like 7 years ago. Sanity. I realized I can "sacrifice" my temporal sanity my "touch with reality" and mostly with mundane common sense for extreme magical powers. I had this "sanity is overrated" and "the world is already mad" mentality. Why bother being sane when people are already governed by their insanity. After going insane for a minor "spellboost" several times I realized there is an "Underlying sanity" that cannot be "broken that easily". Ofc this applies to my internal sanity if my insanity lingers I say or do dumb shit around mundanes and randomly break things so if I want my "charisma stat" intact I cannot waste it mindlessly. Then like 3 years ago I realized I can send my sanity into an even higher unshackled and "proper" energetic overdrive that will fuel my awakening like nothing else. Well many things happened after it but this ape like realization you speak of... I went into the "high energy psychic anomaly" territory and left the "ape" behind. It was like being chased by a weird shadow. It appeared as a 3 eyed gorilla as it merged back into my body. That was the "nominal" way the human body functions. I had to accept that humans are built heavily on the apelike or hominid genetic infrastructure and I cannot let go it that easily. Why? Because when my awakening started to go too fast I started to have doubts I was not willing to run into the wilderness and meditate into perfection and get rid of any earthly or familial attachment. I had to realize I have "feelings" and instinctual attachments like animals. Not to mention I had to realize if I am not eating or let my sexual energies soar too much I cannot control my psychic powers. I had to realize I have to tame my flesh and properly activate my psychic channels instead of this MIND OVER MATTER mentality. Back then it was easy because I thought there is only the "matter" and the "mind". I was not aware of all the higher planes of existence all different all different rules and even "matter" is consisting of different elemental planes and energy formations. >Everything, from little personal habits, to scratching an itch This was something I had to accept. I had to accept the "habits" or the "necessity" of the subtle body. The subtle body is the one that helps the energy body and the physical body merge. It's an in-between. Mastering that grants all the siddhis and such. I had to accept how the energetic habits form. How when I feel pain I automatically relax that part and as I managed to awaken energetic hands I noticed that when some channel clogs and I try to move it my hand just appears there to solve it even if I am half asleep. I had to realize which energies prompt my flesh which my energy body. When I scratch my head I am bothered by energies that try to enter into my brain. There are energies mostly related to illnesses I can only "cure" by fixing the energy formation then cough belch or sometimes even vomit out when things are that deep seated. They are bound by material formations of the body and you need to expel it and cannot merely pour energy onto it. Spirituality is about realizing we are "not animals" but that doesn't mean we can go and ignore the inner animal. The human genetic system is spliced together with several animal formations and we are not just monke but more lanky. In the last days I am figuring out the "Inner bear" of the body. It's about combining the size strength and agility so you can become a juggernaut like predator or something. Bears also climb trees and other stuff you don't expect a fucklarge being do so some muscle harmonizing truth is trying to manifest for me. >And I prefer not to think of everyone around me as animals Yeah I live on a farm and work with animals since my childhood and I realized in my teens that I have a knack for animal psychology once I let my empathy merge with them... And my social skills improved quite a lot when I started to use my lessons in animal psychology on people around me. People are so not aware of their inner animal their bodily needs. They need a "doctor" or some authority to tell them to "drink water" and other retardation like that. It's ridiculous. Humans are so detached from nature they are not even "animals" but diseased pugs in dresses trained to live in small litter boxes. Feel the animal understand the animal and realize that you are not just the animal but inhabiting the flesh of one. Understand the Deus ex machinima. >>1297 Lyran habits die hard huh. I have to meditate naked so my abilities are not disturbed by clothing nor circulation and natural heat production is uninhibited. I had to learn to not feel ashamed not "sexual" about skin but finally go back to the origin point where you were "born naked" and didn't even think it as "weird" at all. Porn and this prude mentality made us too sensitive to the visage of "skin" and it makes people retarded degenerates because they cannot understand the voice their body is trying to signal. And let's not get into the damage makeup did to human perception. Women are making their face look as if they are constantly horny so men instinctively pay attention to the "female in heat" then the female is just "attention hungry" and is suddenly "mad" that the man is "trying to take advantage of her" when she is not even sure she wants to be with the man at all. IF ONLY THEY HAD A BUILT IN SIGNAL SYSTEM THAT THEY LET FUNCTION AS IT IS SUPPOSED TO WORK. And we didn't even get to the birth control pills and other hormonal fuckeries the entire population is constantly subjected to. Wish we learned to work with the inner animal again instead of trying to bypass or deny all our built in genetic wisdom. There is a reason why many entities appeared either as animals or with animal motifs with them. Modern humans forgot their place and went and made themselves even more inferior while thinking they are living in their own supremacy. >were genetical misfits for being hairless Yeah if you are unable to maintain your internal forge to overcome the perils of heat and cold with the power of your own aura and metabolism then yeah... we are genetical misfits. Even I cannot meditate effortlessly in winter under 15 celsius when I don't bother properly heating. I have to take it so seriously and know it will take hours if I do a necessary warm up that sometimes I skip it altogether. Annoying.

>>1296 Oh and forgot to say that we also have internal awakening routines but because nowadays the average mundane constitutes as a "proper human" your intuition have hard time connecting to your higher truth without constantly being disturbed by mundane retardation. Once you step out of line you are perceived as "weird" so subconsciously you try to fit in and cancel awakening urges as much as possible because that will decrease your social standing and chances for survival. Not to mention most people are so disconnected from their inner animal and built in survival instincts that if technology went away tomorrow 99% of the earth population would perish within a month or 2.

>>1302 That isn't the only thing makeup did; that and plastic surgery disguise the genetic material of women so that when men perceive them, theyI assume just subconsciously think that they naturally look that good and that their genetics reflect that, but that just ain't the fucking case. The inner animal is constantly being lied to, and that can't be good for it.

thoughts? https://invidious.protokolla.fi/watch?v=U5c-d1pNnvs

>>1307 it's debatable how spoken practice would change in centuries since teacher, buddhism tooo was codified few centuries after Sakyamuni, i think mohammed was a real person, if only because hadith paint really ugly picture of him

>>1297 >>1302 It’s more clear to me now, thanks. This is certainly a part of me, at least for as long I’m on this Earth. It looks like all of us had this realization at different times in life so that must mean there’s a purpose whenever the animal body makes itself known. I must admit, I haven’t been getting the exercise I should be. I’ll start there and maybe I’ll figure out what else it’s trying to tell me.

>>1046 >Was wondering what is with you earlier today which is usually a sign I will encounter you somehow. I had to calm myself before making the post, i tend to only post after i get crazy with the lust for innards. today is no exception i am sick and just finished overloading myself. >Which kind? What do you see? They literally look like dragon balls like from DBZ. > They can be carriers of your true personality. yup yup which is what i am becoming right now, or rather i am remembering who i was? > I remember reading about Falun Gong and I had a sudden anger an angry growl within like a dog Yeah i can't even force myself to read Falun Dafa felt something poking over and over trying to convert me to the system, so i put the book down, now if i wanna check it i just make sure to be detached and not put any belief in it cursed books i swear. >"teach" or tell anything they will have to overtake part of your mind temporarily. the way it seems to happen for me is >get poison/medicine put into the body >brainwash and change of personality manifests when it "goes down" >this goes on for however long till it's assimilated >"oh ok i get it now" i guess that would be "merging", it's just how i am i like understanding things that way. Concerning spirits it's funny you have to approach them a certain way or some of the high level one straight up punch you across the room, it's like they have many dark aspects? and only one of them is appropriate to speak. I guess for a humans it would be like surprising them from behind versus getting a meeting in a nice place. >The sun just screams "mundane duty time" for me. Idk bro it's just wrong. My eyes and skin are extremely sensitive to it despite being from a hot region so i might be biased. > the previous inhabitants were humanoid feathered lizard like being with beak like faces heard about it before but never confirmed it myself. >"dragon" is as wide term as the term "humanoid" true many types, some of them are more like pixies sized. >s. It's just when I will start doing that my mind will change shapes and forms and I become a new person again and it takes time to go through that yeah tell me about it, it's amazing but it also sucks big time. >NEVER EVER CLEANSE ANYONE UNTIL YOU KNOW YOU HAVE ENOUGH POWER WITHOUT BEING AFFECTED BY THEIR ENERGIES see that makes me thing is it just because you take their karma? karma is so weird i fail to understand it fully. i just somehow get it as "going against your true will make shit more painful for you till you get it" Inaction is also negative karma even though you're not doing anything bad visibly. maybe fucking up someone who hurt you long ago can be "good karma" and taking it is "bad karma" being true to yourself yadayada. We should have made another word, using eastern concepts carry luggage from religion and i am using it like a westerner would so it does sound kinda dumb. >It is about becoming the other person and you "learn their path" find the blindspots they missed and reconnect them to operate properly once again Yeah i get that, though i am not gonna try that till i am sure i am not gonna kill them if i try. My energies are way too chaotic honestly, pure black fury. oh yeah made a sword with that energy, it can even pierce a dragon i did it with her consent i am trying to resist the urge to cut my head with it. > Also cleansing must never be a powerwank from your side but an act of wisdom and kindness True true but blind kindness is retarded so an act of WISDOM and then kindness lel, i am saying that to myself really, hard to be true to yourself sometimes. >Also you don't "pay" your karma. You "resolve your karma" I really appreciate you try to kick me out of my money paradigm. I guess i got obsessed cuz rn i am trying to earn money to be idk free or something, maybe also cuz it's fun. but yeah money is a fucking demon and sometimes i just want to burn my clothes and go in the woods, balance is hard. >where I can understand and figure out spiritual teachings effortlessly so even if someone tells me something in an incomplete way sometimes I can still access their proper and higher meaning Like intuition? I sometimes wake up with a ton of memory downloaded to my brain and the feeling i have been talking to someone for awhile, prb where most of my understanding come from tbh. and also putting myself on the path let me see thing that were hidden from veil of isis all that.

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>Imagine a lvl1 wizard casting a lvl 100 flame that drains his mana drains his lifeforce then sets him on fire. right..see my personality is just crazy like that I just realized what i am doing these days is akin to that, i just push myself to the limit to force an awakening, so a lvl1 wizard casting a lvl 15 spell that put him in a short coma but since he got "blessing of nature" he just keep regenerating and gain a "mutation" you played elona? each time. >perfection will arise naturally once we return to the golden age until that we must watch over to know what we and our environment can handle I don't mind waiting i just don't wanna forget who i am again and again, but you were right btw, memories aren't the whole deal, it's about spirit. If you are awakened even with full amnesia you don't forget your true self you just "know". my childhood was so fucking bad so it act as a motivator to not be born as a screaming baby again. >You need to know how to handle high energy (without getting mad wizard syndrome) and low or almost 0 energy without dying too You just become your spirit correct? can handle anything if it's animated by the spirit eh. > cleansing our own energy then the environment then parts of the world that interact with your "path" is important but never more than you can handle. I started influencing the energies around me, it's like i am a gravity point and the energies orbits around me and i can change the "flow" of a place. >Also yes but that is not the main thing. It's like you computer have many photos and games. Every photo is a "different reality" and every "game" has different "laws" but they are all games. Being able to "jump" is actually one of my goals, i hate restrictions, eh i'm prb locking this potential on myself on purpose cuz i have to deal with a lot more mundane and non mundane bs before this opens. >Is that frequent for you? Idk if it was really her or not, i just had bad experiences with sleep paralysis and a snake lady who tried to rape me by folding a penis out of her vagina, i ended up eating her whole which is what started this whole bloodlust thing now that i recall she got me out of my body grabbing a finger, which is what she used to do when alive, playing with us by pulling our fingers to make them crack. So yeah being out of my body made me full hostile with snakes of energy screaming out of my body, don't remember the rest. I don't get "attacked" like that anymore or they get eaten and i forget. >The answer is yes but the explanation of why is quite long yeah how we're not really individuals but a cluster of spirits or something like that. a bee hive? I don't really get it but i can divide my mind into many many fiery fairies and still retain myself, i realized a lot of other me got stuck somewhere, one of them is still busy cursing and old enemy from middle school lmao. i'm slowly absorbing them back, just gotta get authority and order them to merge, some of them even degenerated into full carnivorous forms except for having my face, how many more "me" do i have to kill and eat? how many corpses? i wonder and yet the hunger grow with each core i destroy and absorb. > I expected some "grand mission" or something and not a "do whatever" "here your personal Fateweaver" kek, yeah i think it's how it works for all of us tbh. wanting to do great thing is to be great, a chef feels like a chef a kind feels like a king y'know? it's from Jojo's > I am not a "split soul"

>>1046 >>1333 > I am not a "split soul" how do you know if you got split or not? i am interested >WHICH IS REDUNDANT BECAUSE I WANT TO REDUCE MY OWN DEPENDENCE ON THE FLESH AND NOT INCREASE IT I see it as a attachment/Detachment game you have to be fully invested to get anything out of it and not stagnate but you also have to be able to cut it out whenever you want. and that's with everything, so yup just do that lol. >. Every female fantasy novel is about how they want a dark and magic bf but that is their lustful fantasy speaking. I thought it was vampires not warlocks ? tbh i stopped having high hopes for people, it's not just women who are degenerated it's everyone so tbh i just don't expect much anymore i love them for what they are like kittens but i know one day i'll lose them and that's okay. >This requirement of 2 genders because hermaphrodites genetically and energetically are too imbalanced is annoyin i fucking hate it! Like a dog chasing his own tail forever. Female form with foldable penis seem stable if you're a demon but doesn't work for humans genetics. horrible if you wanna be whole and not lacking anything. > Preparing my "fused soul" takes effort and clarity. This is the problem of seeing too many lives at once. At the start you have to focus on the "common theme" and let the details for a latter and calmer time. sounds fun i hope to get there soon, but knowing me it'll prb just all kind of me fighting and eating each other. > thx to the small hat tribe green parties and tendencies were hijacked and it's hard to be "environmentalist" when you have to associate with people who think immigrating people who throw around trash and outsourcing the industry to countries that have no regulations nor the logistics for clean production is a "solution" and Nuclear is le evil for some reason, so let's dig for more coal ugh. >You ground yourself to a location you work with the spirits you balance and harmonize your energies then you notice how you connect with every other place. As you help the spirits they will help you. yeah and then they love you so much they don't let you go.. and then you try to incorporate humans into the system cuz you wanna protect the land from foreign intervention and now you have to build a structure for karma or something and make anchors a scepter and...ugh seriously, i don't care she's a reptilian i wanted to ask Elizabeth II a few things :'( I swear togashi in on something i won't spoil but go read the succession arc if you got time. >while higher gods don't understand the customs of the local environment so you have to bridge the worlds by yourself then let higher truth guide you forward. remember when i told you the one guiding me with the flame was a female voice? It was Samsana Kali all along! crazy thing is when i asked they told me it was "Samsana" but couldn't find anything about it cuz they spell differently in how it's pronounced in english UGH. yeah she's cool i always liked female more anyway tbh i don't like working with males have to be careful though shit start breaking around me when she works with me, it's like a dark chaotic energy and i get full of rage and destruction i just want to ravage tear entrails drink blood... but it works to raise my energies and open some nodes so not complaning, i'd rather deal with my bs all at once than waste 80 years on one at a time. >.Bound by the desires until you run out of fuel and collapse see the thing is i do want to just wreak things, so maybe i'm just letting the energies express through me, but in that state i don't care about much except "destroy" my normal ambitions are burnt to charcoal the moment it starts. oh right i once found a weapon that looks like one of her swords, i thought it had something to do with communism cuz it looks like a sickle, never been able to use it, it "rots" you with gold if you touch it, had to seal it in a box then in an abyss. >Yeah that kinda left me after seeing the current state of CS industry. Look up risc-v and guix linux, it's one of the few things that give me hope. >Yeah... same... Seen myself growing a tail and horns again, the tail have chakras-stones so now i can't use the human system anymore nice. Idk how many 6 9 12 16, goes deeper i block at 23 and then it left, it's like small previews, maybe my final body will be like that but now i'm only allowed to see this. >Don't forget "current (You)" is also part of the "real (You)" Thanks i sometimes forget that in my mundane stupor, thinking i'll just die somehow and then TADA but it's the same old awareness just more uh aware? > I am saying this because if your fear of death and desire to live is not balanced you will be... well... I am on my "fuck my shit up" phase so i don't care anymore? i am ready to die lol or at least part of me want to. There is a place i come back to, a volcano with a pool of lava, a woman stand by always watching me, happened a few times till she gave me a dagger and told me to cut my own head. seem no one will do it for me. It's funny i spend weeks making my neck strong enough to make any blade bounce and now i have to cut my own head! i think it's about cutting head being put into idk a metal egg that burns everything about you to be reborn, it's painful. i wish i could just jump but gotta internalize the meaning first ultimately i do it to myself. >Did you watch Haruhi and the part when she rampaged the astral when she was grumpy? nope didn't watch the anime yet. >Seems like you have more? at least 2-3 it's hard to tell why is it so hard to use your 3rd eye fuck

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>But sometimes you have to realize a natural order and realign it so much confusion even the mistakes are part of the lesson, or especially the mistakes i should say, you're thrown into crazy situations and have to find a solution on the fly and deal with whatever ramifications. >but it mostly stems from my current distrust towards the monetary system We could make monero-chan into a deity and distribute it around humans, come on bro it'll work this time for sure! i wanna burn everything > psychic powers are about being able to "externalize the mind" and once you overdo that it becomes the "wandering mind" problem. I got this technique a week or two ago to absorb my parts maybe you could just call them back whenever necessary and then eat? >then other "whimsical" entities might approach you. Especially if they are pissed. yeah and then you get stuck ruling a country sucks :<. > Every person is a mystery. Never forget that right thank for the guidance. > This comes from an early ritualistic method. So hard to decipher it. I am accepting it at this point :/. > They are native american spirits signifying evolution and other things similar to that. They are a good sign. Oh cool, i keep seeing them sometimes. >Yes that happened with me too. Still does, It becomes like a reflex because the energy tells you how to connect them. Also had the hands i use for energy work stuck in some weird mudra behind my back spirits told me it was forbidden to teach that one but could be a lie to make not procrastinate lol >Absorb it. You will need this love then as you make a breakthrough create a "solar fusion" you will reattain a new energy a new love then you give it back tenfold Give it back how? do you just make your influence grow over them like a projection of your authority ? I am not just absoribing love, hate as well, give me back myself damn it! >You literally inject it back and the stone tablets become even more colorful. Seems all stone tablets are actually that, golems, i have a few laying around that i found i'll look at them when ready to deal with that.

>>1251 >I managed to reach a deeper understanding of the meridians and energy flow and I had to acknowledge this truth Oh cool i am glad ! >Started to read Atlas of Acupuncture i wish i could read a whole book like that by myself, but i just go by instinct so i take some part here and here apply it fuck it up learn it and then go back, takes me years to read some book whilst i can read 40-60 page a day of a fiction book with no problem. I have digestion problem as well, what's happening now is that i found myself in some place near a watefall and i just open my stomach and let everything out in the water, old gunk, old blood, helps tremendously with the pain, a fire is there as well so i burn and clean with water pm. I hope i am not polluting some's pond, but eh i'll just go in there and clean it if thats the case, hard to tell what's mine or not, do astral realm ponds suffer algae blooms ? who knows but the floating "fish" never complained if i gave them that kind of matter. there were 2 spirits who attacked me there but i think they were in the wrong and we made up, i guess they just hate being bothered wtf were they doing anyway holding hands for eternity? i got my cave and they got their home so whatever. Found an object called "sword's of t/demetria" make me wonder if the place i find myself in belong to somebody and i just barge in cuz i vibrated to that frequency.

>>1335 Oh right on immortality i found a few ways but they're all fake and gay. >Make deity of yourself as household/family protector >Attach it so it's actually just you in a different body >Now you can keep going as long as your descendant give you liquor and food I mean that's one way, i wonder who even teach me these things. I prb astral project in my sleep and don't remember, i think i got lost in a giant library once too lol.

>>1336 Okay so this could work but it's also a bad idea. If you're not careful people's desire will change your makeup and you will be a little more than a tool for their prayers, so if anyone reading this don't do it unless you can "write it in stone" the qualities of that being and make sure the people praying to it adhere to it or else you'd be subject to change and since you're not a god you'll be stuck being that instead of it just being an aspect of you.. I looked up deep into that egg in the volcano and it looks like pic related, seem it symbolize evolution? some similarities to world of warcraft's concept of world-soul i believe. Too bad it scorch everything about you, idk burning sin, very painful might be what i have been looking for all this time. This is just an analysis with my current understanding...these energies.. very hard not to puke rn.

>>1333 I have some freetime today so I will commence my longpostmancy >after i get crazy with the lust for innards Looked into that innard lust of yours and... I got an image of a skin parchment with colorful runes etched into it and when I tried to analyze it electronics started to flicker so I stopped there. Guess its more potent and quite incompatible with my magic so far. "Cannibalistic ritual murdermagic" is not my forte. Wonder if the drow expert of fringe bothers to comment about it. I am not sure about drows. It's like they have "clans" of sorts and their magic differs in levels and potency the common theme is usually brutality but it's not a constant requirement. Their tattoos and weapons usually explain the way they operate but analyzing them counts as "rude" and they reply by stabbing you in the face... and they are not the type that "get impressed" when you stab back. Warrior culture and murder culture is not as similar as some outsiders would think. >Which kind? What do you see? They literally look like dragon balls like from DBZ. I meant which kind of memories they contain. >rather i am remembering who i was? Yeah something like that. >Concerning spirits it's funny you have to approach them a certain way or some of the high level one straight up punch you across the room, it's like they have many dark aspects? and only one of them is appropriate to speak. Well I am not exactly sure what spirits you are interacting with currently but because you are either a "rabid animal" thanks to the overwhelming energies of your awakening process or because some "mortal desire" that you "carry to the table" is either disgusting or distracting and they "punch it out" first then talk later. The reason why it is necessary because the brain and the mind have many "mental currents" and if you don't use one for long or ever in your current incarnation it gets clogged with trash and when you try to "reach" a higher being you literally vomit that trash into their face before a sound or thought comes out of your mind. At first entities moved my head into directions so "I can hear them properly" because some of my mental currents were misaligned and I had to cleanse my mind several times and it's still not clear. Currently I am trying to understand a "higher crown chakra" mental flow system that allows multiple higher thought flows and have the ability to "perceive them" with minimal effort. I learned that I make "memories" by "dirtying" and "anchoring" or marking the memories with multiple negative energies for a "quick recall" because the negative energies I have are more abundant than my positive ones... and now that overcharging these negative energies are making my head explode if I am not paying attention. This system needs to go. i have to learn to think with the most gentle thoughts ever. >I guess for a humans it would be like surprising them from behind Are you assaulting entities? Or how do I imagine your "approach" here >versus getting a meeting in a nice place I usually have to let my energies "sync" with the energies of the entities until a "reality consensus" manifests then we are in the "same room" with the "same mindset". For me it is necessary so I don't cause psychic anomalies and I can make sure that the information and lessons I am getting are close to "it's truth" as possible. The mind can translate concepts in weird ways sometimes and it's important to watch that you are not making misunderstandings for yourself. >Idk bro it's just wrong. Yeah :/ >My eyes and skin are extremely sensitive to it I think it was like a decade ago but I realized while sungazing that I can "tune" my eyes to be "receptive" to the sun or straight up blind me. Didn't understand how it works but I had several eye sight increase practices... that I had to trash when I realized how eye meridians work and how the eyes project and draw in energies with different energy formations and my "old system" was too harsh and made my nerves constantly twitch. Usually I need like a month or 2 and I get used to the cold or hot but it depends how fast I want to adapt. 2 years ago I wanted to do the adaptation in like 2 days but because I can summon wind whenever to ventilate me from heat I realized I don't have a patience for this shit and made the wind blow with minimal intent because my frustration fueled it. Your energy flow can make you "harmonize" better with seemingly "hostile" energies if you figure out your connection with nature. This is the problem with aeromancy. You realize there is no such thing as "perfect weather" because it's always situational and bound by many factors. >but never confirmed it myself. Me neither. i just had to accept the "possibility" so my energies can harmonize with my "origin energies" better. Things that happened so long ago that not even "fossils" exist from it are rarely worth exploring beyond curiosity. I leave these things for later times. The farther you go in the past the more mindfuck you have to understand and at that level not even the nuttiest schizos will understand what you are saying. >some of them are more like pixies sized It's not just about size but their function and attributes differ so much I have to usually look into what the other person is talking about to make sure I "know" which "dragon" he is talking about. >it's amazing but it also sucks big time. Yeah you cannot halfass the process. You have to make sure you "have the time" for it. >is it just because you take their karma? Usually you take their "Hostile energy". It's like you get served food. The other person is eating the food slowly and you offer "help" by eating it. It turns out the food of the other person is rotten and because of that you also have to suffer "food poisoning" as your own system "works through" that energy. You might think "all karma is the same" but while some people cannot eat it because it's "too spicy" some karmic energies are rotten because their "owner" never practiced "self care" or straight up indigestible and your entire body fights it until you eject it. Oh and the worst part. Some of these energies are "generated" by the person. Which means their "karma" is a sign they should fucking change their lifestyle. But you the nice and extremely stupid "healer" go and "take it" now they can go back and continue that lowly lifestyle because they are "healthy" enough to pursue their degeneration. But now you the clueless healer made a psychic link with the retard and the retard continuously dumps his "trash" into your energy field because you signaled that you are a literal energetic dumpster for them. Then until you either collapse or send back all that shit to them they cannot "notice" that they should change their lifestyle and stop generating that karmatype. This is why wisdom comes first in healing and it's important to know what you are dealing with. People can be so spectacularly retarded it's ridiculous. >karma is so weird i fail to understand it fully Ye >i just somehow get it as "going against your true will make shit more painful for you till you get it" That is also part of it. But there are other "Minor karma types". Like "societal karma" which is the energetic mess your environment generates. You can call it a manifestation of the collective unconscious where you "share the burden" then there is the "ancestral karma" that you get from your ancestors and you "carry it" until you genetically and spiritually "overtake your body" aka you are not just "living off" the gifts and curses of your ancestors like youth vitality and other genetic gifts like the intelligence of your father the metabolism of your mom etc but an actual manifestation of your own soul forces.

>>1333 >Inaction is also negative karma even though you're not doing anything bad visibly Inaction or laziness is actually an "activity". With that your body still "moves" still breathes circulates and generates energies. Is it like a rest or a meditative stillness or a generation of harmful and slothful energies. If you are not willing to work why should your organs work. Why should your soul "even try" when it's "comfortable" enough to rot within. This dullness is also something that I am exploring. I realized that my "will to live" does not come from "enjoying life" but a sort of "defiance" against those that try to fuck with me. I live as an obligation and or to "prove" something and not because I see any "meaning" in life. Which is a problem. Life has it's own and great meaning but some of my lower aspects are not feeling it. They desire the entropic darkness more than the joy of life. The only energy that "snaps" me out of it is my anger that I employ against those who "try" to take "even this part of myself". Made me realize I made a retarded attachment system with this and now I am taking it apart slowly and ho boy. I never realized the levels of emotional retardation I went through as I navigated my life. >using eastern concepts carry luggage from religion and i am using it like a westerner would so it does sound kinda dumb. Karma means action. It is just the action and it's consequence. We are not seeing with our mundane eyes but the original energies of the action established a consequence before we even started "acting on it". You "didn't do it" you just "went with the energies" which just proves you are "not in control". It's important to realize how these energies move us and how we move these energies. You can discharge and change the polarity of many actions many karmic types once you know and see what you are doing. This is why mindfulness and awareness is paramount. >My energies are way too chaotic honestly, pure black fury You are trying to "break through". There is a layer you are trying to grasp break and "make it your own". The problem is that not all "breakthroughs" can be done with pure mindless destruction. First the intensity is important that it's the necessary level not higher or lower and the "elemental" resonance. It's like how you can stop a firestorm with a dynamite because the explosion "blows away" the fire. Which means combining explosive and fiery energies at the wrong moment can make them cancel them out. Or with wind. Wind blows out the candle light but makes a firestorm stronger and unstoppable. My destructive abilities were not just "firebound" (especially because there are too many firetypes holy shit) but the flow of wind and how electricity and lightning is "created" or how it "flows" was also important... then how and "what" is exactly "lifeforce". Yeah... Just realized some days ago that I don't know enough about some aspects of magic to talk about it again. So annoying. >made a sword with that energy Question. Did you ever "act" upon your hatred IRL? Like destroying something while being completely possessed by it making people feel sick scared or collapse around you or just break things in a way you could never do that "consciously"? Or you mostly heald back and argued maybe got into fights. Did you act upon your hatred so hard it made things irreparable? I am asking because I am able to see some parts of that hatred and it seems it needs to "connect" to something. Your hatred is different from mine and I am not sure how it connects to your psyche. The message I am receiving from it <I have to end this I have to end it all or I will not go further Your hatred is directed at some specific issue. Can't figure out what. Seems like I didn't manage to experience it as profoundly as you in my current life to be able to relate to it easily. The energy is almost "mad" that I am unable to "get it" when it's "so obvious". Feelings usually fool themselves to think that they are "obvious for everyone" or they think "no one can understand it" and repeat patterns until someone properly deciphers them. Truth lies in the middle. We all live different lives but we all share a reality so no feeling is too alien nor too close to our own. The best course of action is always to understand ourselves first but sometimes they need "company" so it can truly "mellow out". Sometimes things needs to be talked out or if it's banal as hell you just have to find it's source and "let go". I will not look up some elementary school classmates because they were rude once. Was even surprised I have an energetic current embedded into my emotional body from that age. Like wtf I thought I was done with that. It turned out it was a cornerstone of a previous thinking process of mine and because I didn't really "flesh it out" it was allowed to stay around. >I really appreciate you try to kick me out of my money paradigm. Materialism is a curse we have to not just transcend but "let go" or we entrap ourselves with the "material aspects" of spirituality. Like those that buy crystals and snake oils that some hippie shaman sells because their horoscope said they need it. Then it evolves into a "I have to go to india and work with the OG shit eating gurus or I cannot ever attain true enlightenment and for that I have to wageslave for the next 2 decades so I can have enough money and freetime to learn Sanskrit and a house so I can visit a guru everyday". And let's not start talking about artifact hoarding and other "ritual necessities" you need according to "western ritual magicians". Yes they are good and sometimes required to stabilize the energies and not fuck things up but that is "not the point". Most issues can be solved by meditating and "being aware of the present" as much as possible. The moment when people realized they can make money from "spiritual themed nonsense" the whole thing went south. >I guess i got obsessed cuz rn i am trying to earn money Money is a curse that I too cannot get rid of yet. The "trick" is being able to "Notice" the "prosperity" and "wealth" energies being able to generate and "act" upon opportunities that might grant you money and never ever exploit it. The moment when you go into "hoard" mode aka "greed" you absorb all the curse and negative energies money "transmits". You have to realize money is a "means to an end" so are "all material riches" and never sacrifice your health nor your soul for money. Money is like toilet paper. You use it to clean out the mundane shit from your life until you learn to stop generating shit for yourself. >idk free or something Explore this further. What it means to be "free" and what are the shackles others imposed upon you and which are your "own" that you can take off the moment you notice the locks. This is how you "resolve" karma. Some are mere mental or emotional. While some action' requires further or a counter-action and you have to figure out what activities you need to do to truly resolve them. It's not like going to a shop and ask for a deep karma cleaning... but most types of karma can be cleansed in many hell or purgatory dimensions so never think that you have to do all of them on the physical. I visited so many and most of them was unintentional. I am in a dream and suddenly in a golden bath and the "doctors" (assistant demons playing dressup) are explaining how I require further "operations" so I can get rid of it then I tell them I can do this on my own move an energy and they tell me "k carry on then". Not even demons understand fully karma even tho that is their whole job and purpose to handle that. This is why I have a bunch of demons following me. wtf I thought I will have to doomguy them and not educate them. I WAS LIED TO. I thought they are just fucking with me but once I fucked up my energy work so hard they appeared and started to restore my energetic systems without even asking them to do it.

>>1333 >maybe also cuz it's fun Doing work grounds me well so I cannot abandon it yet. Sure is fun paying taxes and family debts in an economy that is doing it's best to collapse and even fails at that >i just want to burn my clothes I had a part where I had to rip apart my clothes in a frenzy where my "real strength" came out signifying how I broke several limiting old energy barriers of the body. I rarely use my full strength because I am constantly holding back so I can be a "functioning member of society". When I am "truly myself" I am 3 times as strong because other times I am "merely dragging a corpse through the day". Had to break that mentality. Society managed to "program us" that "living your life"= being a hedonistic fuck and wasting money on travel or other expensive activities while staying home and working on your life with minimal expenses is "lame" or "cringe" IF YOU ARE NOT PAYING FOR IT THEN IT'S NOT EVEN VALUABLE. People who think like this need to experience absolute destitute so they can finally "notice" what "value" means. But "poverty" nowadays is when you are eligible for gibs. The moment you have money suddenly you have to "pay for everything" and keep yourself in a perpetual hamster wheel until your health breaks down. >Like intuition? Intuition is a "wide term" tbh. It usually means it is above "grounded reason" which means it is a "thought current" that does not originate from your "analytic mind". >I sometimes wake up with a ton of memory downloaded to my brain Sometimes I am seeing as an outsider observer my own thought currents "talking to themselves" and while I "notice" that they are thoughts I usually "think with" they are "above" the capabilities of my current "memory complex" thus I am unable to integrate it. It's like a thought that I never thought about but "always knew". Gets weirder to operate reality as I move forward. My memories are getting softer more shapeless and sort of "ever present". My "memory recall reflex" is not adapted to it yet. >also putting myself on the path let me see thing that were hidden from veil of isis all that Truth is I had to realize that I "always seen these things" but never "noticed them" because they were "not important" in my mundane perspective. I am constantly recalling memories when some realizations manifested in my life many years ago but I had no chance or reason to truly explore them thus deepen my understanding back then. >right..see my personality is just crazy like that Reach the point where you crash the computer while exploiting the game with your retardation and you learn to be careful. For me one of the first breaking point was going like this >wow so the soul has a number and it is like an infinitely long integer that constantly changes as I live my life? And I can edit the numbers and see how it shapes my life and soul forces??? Wow. What if I change those numbers to ∞. Oh so this is how the fabric of reality looks and the background forces of the matrix operate. OH SHIT OH FUCK I WAS NOT SUPPOSED TO TOUCH THAT HOW DO I REVERSE THIS INSANITY It was not fun. I could talk to the numbers and every minute on the clock described a moment of my life. It was like I became and embedded my psyche into the matrix itself. Took me months to snap out of it. Not seeing the letters and numbers as living beings and the "lines of reality". Not just leylines but "living organisms" that the fabric "breathes" with. You consider insanity as "interesting" until you reach a point of no return and realize what it truly means to "stabilize" from it. >you played elona? I read the thread on /jp/ some years ago and kinda wanted to get into it but never had the time >blessing of nature" he just keep regenerating and gain a "mutation" Actually this is how you cleanse and evolve your genetic makeup. But "evolution" and "cancerous growth" is a different thing. >memories aren't the whole deal, it's about spirit. Yes also spirit memory and soul memory is a thing. It's just you have to get accustomed to your incarnation first before you let your true powers manifest. There are built in mental protocols that "try" to keep them sealed until it's sure you are able to use them without going insane or killing others or yourself. There are several locks and meridian pathways in the mind that awaken and seal many natural abilities. This is where understanding your own genetics and soul compatibility is important. If your ancestors were never big on magic you have to learn to awaken it on your own but if they never had the "potential" you wouldn't be able to incarnate into an absolutely incompatible body thus "there is a way" you just need to find it. >you don't forget your true self you just "know". Yeah >my childhood was so fucking bad so it act as a motivator to not be born as a screaming baby again You have to understand something. You don't dislike the "baby" part but the shit childhood granted by your parents or society. You will reborn as a screaming baby several times while in this body. Awakening is like a second puberty a midlife crisis and a fight to the death for the rights to "reborn" within your own body. And you will have to understand that "shit childhood" is "in the karmic package" sometimes. Some genetic "gifts" are only available if they are balanced with other negative energies. I am quite amazed finding my own genetic potentials that my ancestors could act upon very rarely and accidentally because it was never truly "theirs" and they never developed it into perfection. Having similar genes as Tesla himself? Dad was being able to hear electric currents and dreamed about greys landing because we have a specific attunement to this psychic current and I am the "Only one" who can consciously exploit it by "pure chance"? Yeah fate is a thing. But I am still not sure where it leads. Some parts of me are not ready to "look" while some already "knows" the answer and knows it's not the time for that You will have to realize "why are you here (on earth)" Is it a "punishment" a "deceit" or you "want to be here". Creation is still unfolding and what it means to "have a purpose" is not as simple as some stories make it be. >You just become your spirit correct? Sorta >can handle anything if it's animated by the spirit eh. More or less. It's real complicated. There are elements that enhance the spirit and some dulls or corrupts parts of it. It's all situational. The term "spirit" is also quite wide and your understanding will develop constantly as you move forward. >started influencing the energies around me, it's like i am a gravity point and the energies orbits around me and i can change the "flow" of a place. Yupp. Our "aura" is a sort of "gravity field" and everyone "somewhat" influences their surroundings but rarely notice it and usually they get influenced by it more than they influence it themselves. I am learning lessons how to not accidentally "discharge" energies into the environment when I am not "meaning it". Some of my powers and aspects require me to warp reality in a way It counts as I "didn't even warp it". Howtobeanormalhuman lessons are hard. And no not like the fucking normalfags but actual proper humans that can wield their own powers as balanced as they can

>>1333 >Being able to "jump" is actually one of my goals It's more life "floating" or "drifting" there. You acquire a density and a buoyancy and you reach the place "where you belong" and when you can move freely it means you are not just "allowed" to go there but welcomed. Hard to explain. Every reality has it's natural order and rules you have to not just follow but to integrate into your own being. Like I cannot disable gravity on earth by a whim so I shouldn't do that on an astral realm that is so malleable I am like a "god" there but it gives home to extremely specific beings that fulfill a purpose in a specific ecology and if I mess with it someone might be mad about that. This is why learning "respect" as an energy type and a thinking current that makes you notice the laws and customs of every reality and you know how to "behave" by instinct. Sometimes "behaving" means killing demons and setting things on fire because the nature of that reality was "besmirched" and the person who is suffering because of it is (You) therefore you have a right and sometimes even an obligation to cull the hostile forces :P Cleaning out your personal astral places and interdimensional realms is your duty as a magician. But you have to realize what you want to do with them after the ashes go cold. >eh i'm prb locking this potential on myself on purpose Yeah we have to resolve our karma first. >yeah how we're not really individuals but a cluster of spirits or something like that sorta >i can divide my mind into many many fiery fairies and still retain myself Yeah there are "submissive" and "dominant" parts of your mind and not all of them are part of your "core mind". Just found out that several parts of my mind is still inactive because of retarded childhood traumas that make me limit myself so I don't "get into trouble". I cannot even word how much the retarded education system disabled many parts of my mind while "educating me". Fucking ridiculous. >i realized a lot of other me got stuck somewhere Yeah this is how attachments work and why they are a problem. If any "real" part of you is "stuck" and not retained after death or other departure into other existences you will have a "longing" and you will return to it no matter what. So either the "stuck" part escapes "on it's own" or you have to come back to unearth it. This is why "end times" "resets" are necessary so "stuck" souls can finally gtfo and reality can be "renewed" because stuck souls cause so many troubles holy shit. I just found out how diseases formed "into existence" after the "fall of golden age" and yupp. They are minor "shaved off" soul shards emanating and reproducing shitty desire bound energies. Found out how i fucked up my own immune system in my teens because I had a "knack" for manipulating diseases and my energy field was "attacking itself" because it considered some parts of me as hostile objects while I was slowly supposed to absorb it with my water element my whole energy field went into a high alert to break it apart. Had a cold for a week in the middle of the summer ffs. >busy cursing and old enemy from middle school Was weird when I went into a memory like this so I can "drain" the anger to psych myself up during work and as I went through that energy the elemental school kid appeared at the local gastation out of nowhere after 14 years... He turned into a fat alcoholic and he looked so shit I realized I couldn't grant him a worse punishment than the current state he looks in. The weird part was that he noticed me and said "hi" while I even had a mask on because it was during covid. This is how powerful these attachments are. Resolving them might summon the other person because a "part" of you return to you this way if you are unable to "recall it on your own". >i'm slowly absorbing them back, just gotta get authority and order them to merge Yeah >some of them even degenerated into full carnivorous forms except for having my face About this... >how many more "me" do i have to kill and eat? You see these "(You)s" are connected to you already. Which means if you are a carnivorous retard that eats them like a rabid dog they will also "evolve" into that with you so they can also "eat" the "other parts". The problem becomes when the retarded magician merges with a force that is much stronger and uncontrollable that his own essence "shifts" into an another being and the magician's energy starts to devour himself because he cannot retain the control of his own body/energies. This is why making sure our energies operate with higher more proper and benevolent principles and not by this animalistic eat or be eaten kill or by killed mentality is important. "merger" is not always "eating". I usually let the energy "sync" so they can "explain their woes" and other findings they they can "return" to the "safe state". You have to understand how much pain is to "deviate" from yourself and understand the "thrill of exploration" so you can send out parts of yourself in a way they "return home". Real hard I know. My aspects run around like children on the playground when I get too exited about something and bring me all sort of things. >how many corpses? Just make the reintegration process more efficient. If you are going with the "living flame" model you can do this by explaining to your parts that "becoming one with the flame" is "good" so they pass through the barrier the impurities will fuel the flame and as they return to "true spirit" you will feel "wholer" and not "more hungry". >core i destroy and absorb Understand the common energies of your "cores" so you can "command them" to come back and to "disassemble themselves". They are part of you and their wish is to be (You) and not to "stuck" being something else. >>1334 >how do you know if you got split or not? i am interested I will continue posting later. This posting spree is already too long and explaining how I see my past lives and how some mysteries unfolded while I still don't have a full image needs consideration b4 writing. The tldr is about being able to "get in touch" with your "female aspect" and if it's not just "within you" but an another force of existence that feels "ever present" instead of beaming to an extremely specific point in the earth population then you can conclude that but it's complicated. There are soul aspects higher archetypal forces and "alternate lives" at play that complicate this whole issue. >already at almost 30k characters. Yeah I will continue posting later >>1342 Once I get into my views on immortality and start talking about the "eternity spirals" I am not sure where will I stop my posts. What I wrote is already TLDR. We might need to start an immortality or ascension general so the discussion stays more or less coherent. The hardest part of "immortality" is not the "how" but the "why" and "what for" and understand what kind of "function" you will fulfill once you stop changing bodies so your soul doesn't get weary in a single vessel. Not even sure where to even start because immortality starts when you can transcend the life and death cycle and not even spirits understand what "death" means in some cases. To understand immortality you have to meet proper masters of immortality and understand what you will do as an immortal. Then there is "immortality" and "invincibility" which is also slightly different. Then there is "perfection". Stillness and change. What stays and what changes and what you need to change to stay still and can you call it as an existence worth pursuing.

>>1343 >Their tattoos and weapons usually explain the way they operate but analyzing them counts as "rude" and they reply by stabbing you in the face... and they are not the type that "get impressed" when you stab back. Warrior culture and murder culture is not as similar as some outsiders would think Drow are legit elves, they just don't use the same kind of magic as the common elves. They also expand their numbers by recruiting from hell, where they pick suitable souls out and purify them using alchemy. It involves burning off all incompatible material from the soul and repairing any ripples in it, before inserting it into the womb of a "willing" drow. Their magic moves on the scale from black ritual magic to black chaos magic. But if you practice chaos magic within a ritual setting, you are not drow but a druid. Drow begin with chaos and out of that emerges rituals. Their energy forms a thick mass of brutality around them, it becomes a part of their autonomous nervous system. When you meet a drow for the first time, it's likely they will just attack you out of nowhere and try to stab you repeatedly, If they succeed they will proceed to butcher the body and burn it, eating any meat that's good enough. This is not a conscious willing act, it's their "autonomous nervous system" responding to the presence of a non-elven being. They will not attack other elves, but that is the only restriction. They do not have any control over this. If you want a drow waifu you need to instantly grab and restrain her knife hand, then force her down and rape her with your own knife to her throat. Only when impregnated will she submit, because you created a new drow, and that means you are now a contributor to the elven race, and will not be attacked automatically. That's all there is to it. Elves are elf supremacists and drow are the most fanatical of them. Once accepted you can have a lot of benefit from them, but it's likely most people would die if they tried. Regular elves have an astral reincarnation cycle. Drow are all immortals. They incarnate once only and finish in one run. It can take 70 000 years and they will end up looking very old. Drow women can get along, but men need to stay at a distance from each other, preferably they should have a territory where they can't see the bordering land in any direction, or there will be trouble. Not because they will attack each other, but their energy mass may misfire in violent and unexpected ways. For this reason drow tend to form harems. But they are matriarchal, the males are lower in standing and they don't get to decide much. The standing in drow society for a man is only counted based on his contributions to the race; how many kids does he have. Other than that, males have little value for drow.

Can you take that chuni schizo blabber to sunflower please?

>>1351 With all due respect, I think we need some new blood to freshen up the place. Even if they just make funny shitposts.

>>1351 >calling people schizos for believing in magic >on /fringe/

>>1351 I HATH A REVELATION THE CHUNZARD WILL GO AWAY WHEN You faggots start effort posting and revitalizing fringe on your own and maybe give useful advice to neophytes and misguided initiates instead of complaining and sadposting

I tried to get into Elona, but found it to be very clunky and awkward to play. I'm an avid Dwarf Fortress player, btw. Looking forward to Elin.

So I was meditating and I kept seeing some ugly, flickering violent energy, and I kept asking >what is this? And I got the same word over and over, something that sounded like ershegal or eershegal or something like that. I know I've seen that name before, but I can't find anything.

>>1363 Got it! https://www.worldhistory.org/Ereshkigal/ >She was responsible for both keeping the dead within her realm and preventing the living from entering and learning the truth of the afterlife. OK, that's funny because just before I started meditating I was reading Edward Alexander's book about this very topic (I'll let you find it yourself if that's your karma; I don't want to piss her furher, if that's what's going on here).

>>1361 Do you like to make soap in Dwarf Fortress? Do you use the paid version or the chad ASCII version?

Kabbalah thread is gone. That's the second time I've seen something of quality vanish from this board for no apparent reason.

>>1367 Board is too dead so I was trying to provoke discussion by throwing out some topic. But no one replied to it and re-reading it, it wasn't very good so I deleted it again. You can try making a better thread OP if you have some resources to add so it isn't just a concealed question thread (asking for information without providing any).

>>1368 Fair enough. For what it's worth I was planning to reply about learning hebrew for kabbalah studies, which I've taken up just recently. Would really benefit from resources that explain the symbolic meaning of the spellings of words. Also a tool that lists every word or phrase that adds up to a particular gematria number, would be highly useful.

Is Kenneth Grant a good source about matters /fringe/?

Have any of you visited The Elder Srolls/Skyrim universe on th astral plane? If so what was it like?

>>1395 I've played astral TES IV: Oblivion before. Was an Argonian and I had this rolling gyroscope thing I could roll around and attack in. Quite fun, more so than the actual game (which I enjoyed immensely back in the day) and a lot more vivid. Basically I just fought enemies in the overworld near one of those ancient ruins locations. Other times I've used the Morrowind spell menu while lucid dreaming, but can't recall ever actually visiting that gameworld.

>>1395 I did a year long semen retention in 2013 and I had a dream where I fucked a dead vampire chick from Elder Scrolls. Didn't know back then that the origin of vampires happened because they went through a ritual murder orgy till Molag Bal resurrected them with immortality. When vampire threads started to appear on fringe was wondering if that was related to it in some causal chain or it was a premonition. Or maybe completely unrelated. I think I had an another quite surreal TES dream too but not sure what it was about. But I never went to the realms personally yet. But yeah seems like they exist. I thought the game lore is just higher concepts warped into TES theme with the power of the LSD but it seems there might be more to it huh. Not sure if I want to go there tbh. Todd ruined the future of that franchise. Only mods and memes keep their egregores alive with fresh content and not those who are supposedly are trying to make money from it.

Can I use homemade crystals with household chemicals such as table salt, baking soda, borax, sugar, epsom salt, sodium acetate, etc, as an alternative for store bought crystals in magic? I might have a better time setting intention with homemade crystals than with crystals bought from some amazon warehouse. Also chemistry is one of my hobbies so it might help the crystals resonate with my frequency if i make them rather than buying them.

>>1343 >I have some freetime today so I will commence my longpostmancy Always a pleasure fren. btw i am sorry for taking so long some days it'll happen again but i am not trying to be rude or anything of the sort. also we first talked to each other on sunflower a few months back i think, i wasn't sure cuz some people have a similar smell then i thought you knew but yeah.. >colorful runes Oh i have these all over my body idk what they are. they're also on a wheel structure like a core/point with orbiting wheels, or should i say 0 particle ? 3rd wheel is physical. I am using it as mental aid for physical etheric astral mental etc they also have runes on them idk what happens when they're all activated though! only 4 of them have runes rn is what i mean by not activated. >analyzing them counts as "rude" and they reply by stabbing you in the face. That's just wizard **and programmers* in general not just drows they hate when you reverse-engineer their stuff >I meant which kind of memories they contain. oh right my bad the golden ones have personality the black/dim ones have instinct and subconscious processes. >Well I am not exactly sure what spirits you are interacting with currently my guides so Drow Fairythe one that don't mind murdering humans a black chinese Dragon and Zazzy idk if Azazel or some other angel i just call him Zazzy to communicate i learnt how to open a window of light were their appearance change there Black dragon became golden there Drows are still drows but they're nicer >Or how do I imagine your "approach" here I just go to them all curious and got punched like that i don't assault entities. >eyes project and draw in energies with different energy formations Oh so that's how it works? Nobody can see through my layer of Glamour but i thought of it more as light distortion cuz it bounces back to their eyes, cuz they got no horns nor shining eyes No matter how you look at it my teeth aren't human no seriously wtf does no one notice that. I noticed some humans aren't humans too they look horrifying yet if you asked mundanes they might even say they're pretty the layer of distortion is thick ! Did you notice if you don't eat in front of mundanes they get suspicious and scared of you? i always make sure to eat in front of people especially "people's food" like bread potatoes and fruits almost as if humans have a built in detection for this >to make sure I "know" which "dragon" he is talking about. The ones i met are as follow >Protector of the land >shapeshifting powers, love to turn into a human to live among them >Wouldn't mind eating the bad ones >love humanity and take a guiding approach >see humans as kids who don't know better they're good. >"ancestral karma" that you get from your ancestors well that explains why that cure keep regenerating .. i need to break out of this bs. >Just realized some days ago that I don't know enough about some aspects of magic to talk about it again. So annoying. Nah you explain it well i am finding my balance and keeping it all spinning you are of great help actually. >Question. Did you ever "act" upon your hatred IRL? I mean yeah, stuff broke out around men i also got my mind taken by the energies temporarily and broke stuff with my hand, bent some metal, never took far enough to fuck up my relationships for good . People get scared around me, they go from happy to pale and sweating but i make sure to keep my maelstrom around me and if some parts of me goes for the kill i call it back and teach it to know better, so i never end up truly harming someone who isn't trying to harm me. >I have to end this I have to end it all or I will not go further Oh my you're getting dangerously close aren't you? This is something i can't talk about yet, if i do won't be able to deny myself anymore and then who knows what will happen i might just end up burning everything. It has to do with my last two lives including this current one. It was done out of free will in the sense that if i hit you in the head so hard you forgot wtf you are and made you sign a bonding contract it'd be "legal" i wouldn't call that ethical though. >Sure is fun paying taxes and family debts

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Is that compassion making amends? necessary? can you even go further with family fren doesn't everything have to burn for you too? >I had a part where I had to rip apart my clothes in a frenzy where my "real strength" came out signifying how I broke several limiting old energy barriers of the body. All mental tools, forces you to change the deep core beliefs on the spot, fucking wall of disbelief stooping us from shapeshifting on the spot and throwing fireballs. >Reach the point where you crash the computer while exploiting the game with your retardation and you learn to be careful. yup you're sane fren. the "occultists" can fuck back off to where they came you'll never learn to fucking swim on dry land no matter how long we talk about it and guess what the body knows how to float by itself if you just learn to fucking listen, intuition divine guidance whatever all the same shit. >Actually this is how you cleanse and evolve your genetic makeup. Oh cool i knew i knew how to do it! Just gotta learn how to dance again, find the balance. >"there is a way" you just need to find it. The only genetic gift i am aware of is a powerful evil eye that shoots at random cuz i can't control it yet, it can kill but it only do stuff like make someone fall cuz you got jealous of them. Idk could be an old witch line, i am pretty removed from them culturally i don't talk our native tongue and even if i did they degenerated anyway they just do folk magic and shit like putting period blood in the food you feed the man you wanna keep. I'll prb end up integrating what i can and then making my own line, i can't let my ancestors decide on my means of manifestation and expression. >Our "aura" is a sort of "gravity field" And a belief field eh spooky force people to conform to your thinking, for me it even is part of the whole Glamour spell i am using, passive size is 3-5m and that's a circle, i can use it on a crowds but not for too long it makes my heart go crazy hard to maintain as of now. > if you are a carnivorous retard that eats them like a rabid dog they will also "evolve" into that with you so they can also "eat" the "other parts". It's all good now thanks fren! Gave them the love they need and i am reintegrating them one by one gonna take a while. Yay the power of love. funny finding child you who need a father and becoming that, or a mother a friend, a savior, it's truly..hilarious how fucked we got. >We might need to start an immortality or ascension general Sure fren i'd love that was thinking of making a shapeshifting thread myself. I'll respond to the rest when i have something to say it's hard to find the time to even reach for my computer these days. oh yeah i wanted to add i was doing affirmation stuff found out that instead of shortening ex "i am powerful" in IAP i could just remember the feeling/frequency and have a part of my mind repeat it over and over like the angels chanting gods name y'know? wizard 101 but gotta start somewhere. >>1351 so you mean sunflower the larpers not the real wiz among them and mundanes are two faces of the same coin and that <nothing is meaningful the world is matter! and <everything is meaningful my word-salad out of context means i am the chosen one! are both incorrect ways to view this illusion if ones want to advance? woah!

>>1431 What you call schizo-babble on Sunflower is just tolerance for the fact that some people are legit insane but still practice. The best channellers need to be open, and the most effective transformation will destroy your old concept of reality, so have periods of insanity is normal if you're serious. The board is the outside of what used to be called "the secret test server" on Discord, where possibly very harmful magic was performed with a strictly vetted group. We don't do that stuff out in the open, but consider it "high risk, high return magic" - light, for the public.

>>1433 I knew I smelled a discord clique on that board.

>>1433 mm where you trying to respond to that anon posting without a flag? > is just tolerance for the fact that some people are legit insane but still practice sure but they are left to be crazy instead of getting the hit on the head they need to, nobody is here to correct nobody everything is accepted as factual. which make me think the sunflower is just an egregore that feeds on it's associates and filter their belief to make an accepted reality, maybe the galactic federation were the friends we made along the way which would be fine if y'all didn't talk about 1 million year of suffering at every turn and left it at being lesbian catgirls. I like the sunflower some skilled people there i even shared some artifacts i found but seriously it could be better. Give me almost the same vibe as falun gong "nibble there and there but stay the fuck away". >"the secret test server" on Discord Yeah i read that on the general a few weeks ago covens within covens eh? also >Discord >not XMPP >or even irc

>>1437 >an egregore Egregoral work was always the main point, going by the understanding that the NWO is based on principles, and that spirits and deities don't care about material assets. So if we use the same organizational form as the NWO but do it better, we will become the legit NWO and gain the support of the gods instead of them. That way we hijack the entire process and take over the world system. For this to work all systems need to be included, and the correct egregores linked into it, and that's best done on a mainstream platform with mainstream rules. Having people criticise each other will not work, they need to be able to express their ego in full like the real elites do. They may criticise each other, but this is done from a position of power, so we need to create that same mentality of not expecting criticism. Then we need to also assume the same language and doctrines, a combination of Maoist memetics and kabbalah with regular obfuscation of sexual identity, just with more accuracy than they do it.

>>1438 >we will become the legit NWO and gain the support of the gods instead of them beggars can't be chooser eh idk bro i'd rather we all ascend supporting each other instead of making a gang structure with punishment and stuff. Also i am not a fan of having my mind overtaken by egregores i didn't make myself. yeah yeah i know it's already the case for everyone. >That way we hijack the entire process and take over the world system Ok and then what? how long till it became like the current system? >Having people criticise each other will not work, they need to be able to express their ego in full like the real elites do. So a cult and then if you don't play ball you get the Epstein treatment? Instead of advancing together we just all hit each other in the ballsack leave the neophyte be retards cuz "they should just know better!" till one of us is top crime boss? Idk bro i'd say we're better than this.

>>1439 >rather we all ascend supporting each other That's the point. But to do that we need to eliminate the current incompetent leaders. The thing that enrages me the most about them is their criminal stupidity and wastefulness. >Ok and then what? how long till it became like the current system? That won't happen. The current system allows opposition and its leaders are hiding like rats in the sewers. The new doctrine will be to have no leaders, fully distributed anarchy and no lies, no hiding scum and no one opposing us. >So a cult and then if you don't play ball you get the Epstein treatment? We'll deal with that before full formation, there won't be opposition when we're done, no one will be excluded once we're up and running. >'d say we're better than this. Then you are allowed to be better, no one will stop you. It's those who are worse who will be removed.

>>1440 What if someone opposes you who isn't "scum"?

>>1431 >btw i am sorry for taking so long some days it'll happen again Don't feel sorry. I am not a terminally online (You) farmer not an attention craving slut. This is what I liked about forums that you can post something leave the place visit it days or weeks later then continue the conversations. I hate chat apps because you have to be there 24/7 and I can only do that with close friends. Same with phone calls. I can do it with "professionals" where I know how to talk to them or with close friends/relatives but I usually make them keep it short and only the important bits because important things need to be said personally and when people have the time. I cannot use chatrooms like discord at all because it develops into inside jokes and drama within weeks and if you are not in the gossip network you are out of luck catching on. While on forums you can skim even the most autistic conversations and figure out wtf is going on. >not trying to be rude or anything of the sort. Considering the awakening phase you are going through you are quite well mannered tbh. Not replying within 10 minutes is not rude don't worry about this. Only reply when you feel you have the time and mental clarity to longpost. Truth is I wanted to reply further to the stuff you wrote in the previous posts but my mental clarity was not on the level and... I managed to get into the drow initiation after realizing my awakening symptoms are on the level of the average drow male and the girls like too much when I bring my "shadow" with me. Learned quite the stuff about the drow history and found a cave that led me to a god... He gave me one of his daughter but I have to watch over with this. My intents turn into chants and reinforces pacts and things go a little fast because deep down I "want it" but I know I have to watch over because I will work with a darkness that I didn't manage to work with in my closer past life journeys. Boy I missed having entities that can handle the darker sides of my male aspect instead of fearing or exploiting it. Might write about it later but I feel that I have to explore this mater further before talking about it. >we first talked to each other on sunflower a few months back i think Probable. There are several people coming and going but because you had such an energetic transformation I am not sure which you were >wasn't sure cuz some people have a similar smell Definitely But >>511 Remember this poster? Even he felt that you are "similar" back then. I wonder how much similarities he sees between You and him nowadays. Truth is I am developing a new sense or "taste" for souls but... I am actively blocking it because I feel I cannot use it "Purely" because I still have some "Perversion" in my psyche that makes me into a "soul taster" and "energy gluttony" can also make things awry. The goal is to understand purify and master your own energies and not prey and feast upon the energies of others. That is the "way of demons" and just turns you into a "hungry ghost". I know what fate awaits soul eaters. Also my face and name memory is quite bad even in mundane matters so my energy memory is a hit or miss in some cases. It's still developing and I must not rush it. >i thought you knew but yeah I try to separate sunflower and fringe mentally as possible because if I connect too many energies at once weird things manifest while I post and I dislike when the servers go offline just because the machine spirits got overloaded with energies that I interact with People who change and develop their energies and work with different spirits constantly are hard to trace. For that I have to notice their "origin energy" first and when you do that it is like knowing the "true name" of a demon. It's not just about the "power" you get over a person because you will know them more than he knows himself but... if you start to "meddle" you connect to his karma. Unforeseen things can happen especially if they have a stronger or incompatible path with yours. Currently I am merely "aware" of you but that doesn't mean noticed your "soul beacon" yet so I can trace you wherever you go. That is still dangerous for me. My "extrasocial" skills are not good enough so I can be an "overseer entity" outside of my own sphere of influence yet. My current goal is to restore the wizard population of fringe and practice the way I express spiritual guidance. Greater "Online spirituality" ambitions will come after I git gud at this. The internet is a window into the collective subconscious. If you mess with energies too much things happen when you don't pay attention what you are doing. Not to mention I consider my internet addiction as an attachment i have to work on anyway so I don't intend to ascend into a terminally online "internet guru". I post when I feel it is in line with my true expression and not as a perversion nor as a duty/mission. >Oh i have these all over my body idk what they are Drow chaos and or black magic. But they see chaos differently compared to me so I cannot explain more about it yet>>1347 The drowzard explained it well but there are many more things on this matter I cannot say yet. >they're also on a wheel structure like a core/point with orbiting wheels, or should i say 0 particle ? Same function as dharma wheels and co. Hard to explain their full function tbh because they are still on the "activators" level and not the "full product" stage. >I am using it as mental aid for physical etheric astral mental etc Yeah I have several of them also. I gained several artifacts while awakening that I could have inserted into any physical objects so I can "larp" as a ritual magician. Was wondering what "mundane objects" should serve as magical tool then I concluded that the human body is the greatest tool the magician ever needs in the earthly life and everything else is "extra". What I said was a bold and wise choice because ultimately you will destroy and absorb your own artifacts and return the rest to their "place" but... because the artifacts are literally embedded into my body (was weird learning that the artifacts actually represented organs and bones by default and how easy they merged) they get activated or stimulated if I am not watching with my thoughts... Realized I have to mentally stabilize myself further and I cannot continue this DO OR DIE THE BRAVE HAS NOTHING TO FEAR and run ahead like my ass is on fire... >what happens when they're all activated though! They usually activate on their own "when you are ready" aka your energies are stable and plenty enough to handle all of them at once. >not just drows they hate when you reverse-engineer their stuff It's more complicated here. It's not like I just "infringing on intellectual rights" but if you do it in the wrong way you might break or corrupt their system. >golden ones have personality the black/dim ones have instinct and subconscious processes Yeah was wondering "which kinds" lol but if it's too complicated or personal no need to explain them. They are probably merely the "kickstart" parts of your "cross-life personality" and there will be more when your awakening level increases. >i learnt how to open a window of light Yeah this is important. Being able to sync the environment for entities and for yourself when you visit or get visited.

>>1441 >What if someone opposes you who isn't "scum"? That won't happen because we're aligning with the full structure of humanoid races, if you oppose humanoid races and still carry such a body, you are scum and will be removed for being a parasite, a freeloader on the racial body. Create your own DNA which isn't humanoid if you don't like it, simple as.

>>1431 >i don't assault entities I didn't exactly meant (You) but the "feral energies" that "go with you" and make you crave entrails and co. Drow stabbed me in the face when I went with my "niceguy" spirit form then when I thought I should go with that "sharp elemental form" which makes me able to turn EVERYTHING into a sharp weapon be it metal stone branches or the very air itself to show how much I "respect" their "knife practices" (it's a weird ass karmic path I got initiated after passing a test) the drow jumped the fuck back because I looked like a vengeful entity... then after the drowzard's post I just realized I should stop overcomplicating it and let my "dark aspects" do the talking. >Nobody can see through my layer of Glamour Do not test me >i thought of it more as light distortion cuz it bounces back to their eyes Complicated but that is how "eyes" are supposed to work. Like how bats echolocate. Make sound it bounces back and they "see" with their ears. Eyes are "supposed" to work this way but we have that fucking sun object there and blinds us and make our eyes "sense" only the photons as they bounce. Hard to get past that because once you can see beyond the "veil" you realize there are several more veils and if your mind is unable to process that information you are better off going blind than insane. And yes the "glamour" is protecting you and "expresses" your energies in a new way. Feels like an "eggshell" in functionality. It's fragile and potent at once but the main function is to help you develop in safety. >wtf does no one notice that. Bruh humans are so weird IRL already not just mentally but genetically not to mention you have other traits people focus while talking to you. >I noticed some humans aren't humans too Yeah I am on the "if they behave as humans I leave them alone" approach. For me "people" were always somewhat alien so if they behave I am not questioning their "earthern citizenship". Truth is humans house so many spirits and parasites without noticing and expelling some when things get heated suddenly makes them amicable out of nowhere. >Did you notice if you don't eat in front of mundanes they get suspicious and scared of you? I never ever thought of that but now that you mention it yeah. Interesting perspective. Eating front of others signifies a level of trust even in animals. Not eating front of others is "weird". >almost as if humans have a built in detection for this They have but you have a weird complex about this. Quite interesting tbh. This is something my grandma does too. Waits till others eat and only eats when everyone leaves. I am making her eat with us because she starts nagging you with bullshit while you try to eat in peace. And when she starts eating she eats so fast she almost chokes in some cases. It's a weird trauma circuit for her that I am slowly untangling but it can be annoying sometimes. It comes from our weird workaholic family dynamic. Quite TLDR tbh. >they're good. Yeah you found the benevolent ones for sure. >you are of great help actually. Good to hear. >never took far enough to fuck up my relationships for good . The "trick" is that you don't always "break physical" things but notice what energy formation what misunderstanding causes the anger and break or resolve that instead of loading all your hatred into your "limbs". For a while I was unable to handle this and whenever a conflict arisen my "shadow" started to punch others like a fucking stand from Jojo and people suddenly "behaved" or started coughing and other weirdness. Took time to learn to control it and learn to express "constructive anger" in speech and other expressions. As you awaken you realize you are gaining not just powers but ways to move people and reality in new ways and to reach the next level you have to temper it further to understand the core principles of your being. Was asking because it felt like you are "losing it" but "holding back" at the same time. I had the same. I wanted to retain complete control while I wanted to completely lose it and overtaken by a force at the same time. Be it rage pleasure or love. This made me so imbalanced because I realized I don't know what I want at all. I had to realize how my internal switches work. I am not a conflict searcher or maker but a conflict resolver and once someone makes a conflict arise I notice the ways I can resolve it and I will use the extra energies that they "awakened" within me. >People get scared around me Yeah... took me time to notice it too. I didn't realize how terrified people can become when I get angry. I was too lost in my own rage to see it. Remember when I made a woman cry just by ranting about an issue because she lost control over her emotions. I developed a "dominant empathy" many years ago because when I noticed how shit the energies are that people have and makes me sad and sick I realized I can "command" their energies to match mine and not drag me down to their level constantly. When my energies were weak and subdued it was just a minor skill but when my energies started to arise it started to cause anomalies. >but i make sure to keep my maelstrom around me Learn to become the "eye of the storm" and invite those who deserve the "peace" that you can find in the center of the storm. You can preemptively get rid of hostiles that are still trapped within their subconscious before they even approach you if you do it right and find the absolute serenity that your center produces. Took me time to balance it. Shit was creaking around me when I "awakened the storm" for years before it balanced out. >if some parts of me goes for the kill i call it back and teach it to know better I realized I can short circuit it if it does it without my "approval" the first attack will be done on my "own flesh" and the pain it causes will be "felt" by the shadow itself so instead of creating an "eye for an eye" long winded karmic scenario it just "bites his own tail" if I am not allowing it to act upon the impulse. Seeing people get sick and terrified randomly is not fun. You heard the retarded leftist term of "microaggression" I am sure. Now imagine your impulsiveness kicking others for energetic microaggressions that they didn't even "mean". So easy to deescalate situations when you know what are the correct energies that a situation needs instead of making others choke in your presence. An employee just mentioned some days ago how terrifying my glare is and she knows she needs to not bother me when I am doing it and spirits told me the same before. Not to mention I realized I can literally "stare down" some hostile forces in some scenarios. But it's not a "skill" it's just my pissed energies expressing themselves through my eyes. I cannot do it at will nor I like to do it. Makes my neck stiff at the end of the day. >so i never end up truly harming someone who isn't trying to harm me Yeah it takes real practice to learn to do that. Not to mention "breaking karma" is not always a "harm" long term. Sometimes you can break their karma if you know what you are doing. It's a weird mix of impulse and intuition. Some energies of theirs literally "taunt me" and I notice it and break it because I learned to break that type of energy formation already. Always wonder if it's the work of their shadow or similar. Can't really call it good or bad. Karma needs to be resolved but the methods can vary. >Oh my you're getting dangerously close aren't you? You talked about the sword and I can literally see it with my own eyes because you put that much energy into the post while writing. The things people describe with their posts sometimes instalinks to the concept they are talking about. Also I consider myself quite the expert on hatred and anger issues so it was not really hard to connect to it.

>>1443 >because we're aligning with the full structure of humanoid races What if someone disagrees with that? It's pretty freaking dogmatic to assert that someone deserves not only death also but the elaborate hell-dimensions you supposedly consign them to just for committing the crime of disagreeing with you.

>>1431 >This is something i can't talk about yet No worries. Only talk about stuff when you feel either ready or you resolved them already. The stuff I share are usually things that I am "done with" more or less. No need to open up scars that are still healing. Let them heal then explain the "experience" if you feel like it can be educative for others. >if i do won't be able to deny myself anymore Hard to explain but you can "overcome" yourself also. Reach a point where you know you are "stronger" wiser or sure of yourself you can handle that aspect of yours then "accept him". Like how in Matrix 3 Neo realized he needs to "accept" Mr Smith the same way Mr Smith "accepted Neo" when he first tampered with his programming. Then Neo did a full circle and disabled the entire "shadow system" that he let lose. Then he took a snooze so he can fit into the Jesus allegory then was brought back because Warner needed more money lol. I love and hate that franchise so much. They explain and misinterpret some aspects of spirituality at the same time so well it's ridiculous. >who knows what will happen i might just end up burning everything ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I remember when my energies went out of control and realized how many hindu tales talk about "demon gods" that are the "incorrect manifestations of Brahma" and they become all powerful but because they are still blinded by earthly desires like rage and greed they destroy everything until Krishna/Shiva/Kali or some other deity slays it. I asked of the gods I worked with to slay me when I go completely out of control because I don't want to become the "worst manifestation of myself" and they replied that >You never reach that point and always turn back before it's to late. Made me much calmer because I realized they are right. Even if I think I "lost control" I am still aware still an observer of the process and can either stop or change the direction of things at will. I realized I need to calm down and cultivate awareness further. I think you should ask Kali about this. I worked with her too and she knows how to slay and "digest" your demons in a way you can awaken Shiva within and without. >that if i hit you in the head so hard you forgot wtf you are and made you sign a bonding contract it'd be "legal" OOooohhhh. This is tricky as hell. If you are "Not yourself" by default and make others "forget themselves" then give them a way they are on the level where they count that they are the "same" in a way it sometimes allowed while if someone "found himself" and you literally blocked his path from advancing and fucked up his destiny then it is an another issue... Details are seriously important here and I think you should talk this out with Kali or Azazel. >i wouldn't call that ethical though. Yeah you will notice that what is and isn't ethical is quite situational as you move forward. Details and clarity is always important in these cases because oversimplification and confusion can hide the core of the issue. Talk it out with your entities. Currently what you need is not regret nor lamentation but a new perspective to see the big picture. >Is that compassion making amends? Somewhat. Truth is it's a stabilizing force in my lower and higher aspects. It's like playing Recettear or other games where you have to collect gold and reach a goal then you "won". It's more of an "excuse" to stay on earth instead of an "Obligation". >necessary? Hard to explain but my awakening is incomplete. I had a past life where this happened and my mind broke apart and I had to incarnate as a female several times so I can pick up the parts of my unhinged male aspects. When you asked about the >>1049 >lol and what about spells cast in a past life.. and I replied >HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I kinda let the madness overtake me there. >can you even go further with family fren They have their roles that they will play out. I just don't want them to die and scream in the afterlife as they rip each other apart. I want to help them make amends in this life so they can go on in peace. Their life was a turmoil and they didn't exactly "deserve" it. It was the product if the times. >doesn't everything have to burn for you too? "Burning" is about releasing trapped energies and use the energy to create something new in the process. Not just destruction. Flames cleanse create and build too. >All mental tools, forces you to change the deep core beliefs on the spot yeah >and guess what the body knows how to float by itself if you just learn to fucking listen This was my worst thing in childhood. My swimming teachers didn't manage to explain this basic shit concluded that I suck at swimming then made me do useless crap with that floater and took me a decade later when my cousin explained something about floating while on a vacation and the whole thing clicked in an instant. Was so mad that "teachers" rarely manage to "teach" they just "do their thing so they get paid" and nothing else. >Just gotta learn how to dance again, find the balance. Yeah >i can't let my ancestors decide on my means of manifestation and expression. That's not how it works. YOU MAKE YOUR ANCESTORS PROUD BY SURPASSING THEM. Once you are "above" an understanding so much you don't need to be "held together" by genetic gifts and curses you can integrate your own truth into your being. Genetic mutations are not just genetic defects. I realized I have more gifts than curses it's just my close ancestors were not really expert making use of them. But what can you expect from living under communism. Alcohol is your best friend and ambition is your enemy there. >And a belief field And authority field/influence >force people to conform to your thinking All I am trying to do to make them able to "listen to me". I dislike overtaking others because once they are out of your influence or you require the energies for something else they malfunction also fuck micromanaging people constantly. I am no control freak. >but not for too long it makes my heart go crazy hard to maintain as of now The heart is one of the most important energetic core of your being. Always listen to your heart. >Gave them the love they need Nice >funny finding child you who need a father and becoming that You got it >hilarious how fucked we got And sad and extremely infuriating in some cases

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>was thinking of making a shapeshifting thread myself Nice >I'll respond to the rest when i have something to say it's hard to find the time to even reach for my computer these days Same. It's the beginning of the harvest season for me too. >wizard 101 but gotta start somewhere You will learn to shift into the "zone" at will when you git gud but yeah babysteps until you don't know how to run and jump like a tiger. >>1436 Fringe was dead for quite a while and somewhere people had to gather. I was not part of any discords because I considered the bane of the internet but it was inevitable. >>1437 >nobody is here to correct nobody everything is accepted as factual. It was supposed to work as a think tank. Not to mention correcting others when you don't "see" things with the same eyes is redundant in magic. Insights are insights. If you can confirm it or correct it you can do it if not then it's best leave it that way. There are arguments there it's just most people noticed the "style" of the others already. >the sunflower is just an egregore that feeds on it's associates and filter their belief to make an accepted Yeah but every egregore does this already.